WHO: Billy Sinclair & Luka Romanov WHAT: Quick one! On the eve of the 13th, Billy and Luka have their last night of secrecy before Billy plans on telling people on his own terms.
They were so close to not being a secret that even Luka was getting nervous. Some of the adults knew, a couple of the kids knew, but it wasn’t the same as putting themselves out there and awaiting judgment. Especially the day right before the big holiday party where Billy’s mom was going to be. There was a good chance she was going to rip Luka’s head off and end the whole thing then and there.
They had to spend their last night well. After it all came out, the pressure would be on from all sides. It would be freeing, but they would have to watch themselves and take care not to end up splashed all over the media. Other people would be allowed to have opinions and voice them, and there would certainly be a lot of that.
The night was quiet. They’d spent most of it curled up in bed and catching up with SNL. At some point Luka had gotten a little handsy. On any other night, it would be Billy’s cue to shift into his more human form, but Luka didn’t pull back to let him change. He kept touching, murmuring in Billy’s ear: Stay like this. Please.
Billy had hesitated, but Luka seemed so sure, seemed so okay with it, and Luka’s hands against his fur had felt right. He’d had Luka’s hands against his skin, but as much as he loved his human form he really didn’t identify it as being fully his own.
Maybe that explained why, this time, when Billy collapsed back down onto the bed, he curled up tight under the covers and buried his head under the pillow like he wanted to cry.
“Hey...” Luka gently touched Billy’s shoulder and settled down next to him, nuzzling the fur on his arm. “Billy? Did I hurt you?” Billy was emotional, but not like this.
“No----no.” Billy turned around so he could face Luka, burying his muzzle against Luka’s shoulder and wrapping his limbs around him. “No, you didn’t,” he insisted. “It’s just. It’s different, and I never thought anyone would look at me like this...” He wiped his hand over his face. “A part of me feels like I should feel like a freak, or I should feel wrong----”
“Why? What’s wrong about it?” Luka nuzzled Billy’s hands and held onto him, rubbing his back. “This is your body. How is it weird to want to use it?”
“Because I’m not----I’m not human,” Billy said quietly. “Isn’t that wrong?” His parents had both been wolves, and while Rahne had been with other humans, she didn’t exactly do things in her wolf form. Then again, her wolf form wasn’t how she was born. “It’s one thing for me to want that, but you?”
“Do you think there’s something wrong with me?”
Billy lifted his eyes to Luka. In this form, he didn’t have much of a smile. It was more of a shift in expression, a softening of his features. He nudged Luka’s cheek with his nose. “No.”
“So... there’s nothing wrong with me. There’s definitely nothing wrong with you. There must not be anything wrong, then.” Luka nipped at Billy’s muzzle. It didn’t take extra effort for him to want to be with Billy like this. He wasn’t swallowing any prejudice or forcing it. The big difference was that Billy couldn’t kiss and that he was more fun to cuddle with. Nothing worth freaking out over.
“I don’t know if I want to be this way all the time,” Billy said. “I don’t think it’s disingenuous to want to be able to really kiss you, or feel your hands on my bare skin, or not worry about my claws.” To make his point, Billy lifted his paw-like hand and brushed the tips of his claws over Luka’s cheek. They weren’t razor sharp, but with enough pressure they could do damage.
“I kinda like the claws.” Luka nudged him, pushing Billy down onto his back so he could crawl up between his legs. “I love you no matter what you want to do. You’re still just as sexy, but don’t take it the wrong way when I say that I agree, and I would be disappointed if you decided to stay like this forever and never suck me off again.”
“Mm.” Billy shifted into the form he used most often with Luka, human except for his ears and tail. He leaned up and indulged in a slow, soft kiss that he couldn’t manage in his natural form. “Hey. Tomorrow’s my birthday.”
“It is.” He nipped at Billy’s chin and happily ran his hand down his bare chest. “Big day.”
“I’m going to tell people,” Billy said quietly. “I... Half the staff already knows. It’s going to come out and I need it on my terms. I’m just afraid about my mom knowing.”
“Me, too. But we’ll deal with this. I promise.” Luka went quiet, gently kissing Billy’s cheek. “They can do whatever they want to us. They’re never taking me away from you. Not even your mom.”
Billy reached up to lightly touch Luka’s hair. “Can you protect me? My information. I don’t want this getting out the way Owen’s story got out.”
“Of course I will. You don’t even have to ask.” Luka could handle whatever the media threw at him, but Billy deserved to be able to keep his privacy.
“I love you.” Billy kissed him hard. “And whatever happens, you’re worth it.”