[Log] Open Your Mind Who: Balfour Vallet, Kamizuki Izumo When: October 7th Where: Izumo’s room What: Between rounds, Balfour and Izumo have a little chat. Secrets get shared. Warnings: Izumo, kissing, biting Open or Closed: Closed Observable: No
*
Balfour lay on Izumo's bed, curled up against him, just resting after their little roll under the covers. His gloves were off and a bare hand rested on Izumo's heart, just feeling, enjoying the closeness, the feel of warm skin under his hand.
He smiled. Izumo made him happy, though he wasn't sure why. After all, they weren't even in a relationship. Then again, the fact that they weren't only made Izumo's choice to spend time with him that much sweeter to Balfour. It was a privilege, one he was afraid to lose.
Even still, sometimes his curiosity got the better of him.
"How'd it go?" he murmured, pressing a kiss to Izumo's shoulder. "The, ah, rumor thing you had to fix the other day."
Only one person had asked him about it, and he'd told him exactly what Izumo had said: illusion practice. He bought it, at least.
"Well enough. How many people will buy it is anyone's guess," Izumo answered, after a moment, rousing himself from satiated drowsiness. He sighed and relaxed more heavily against Balfour, lazily curved in the hollow of the larger man's body. He didn't want to move, eyes closed and mind pleasantly fuzzy.
"Why?"
"I want to know," he murmured, sliding his fingers up slowly, hand coming to cup Izumo's jaw before it slid back down and he sighed.
"One guy asked me, so far, but he seemed content with the answer, if a bit unnerved."
"Good. It's an unnerving answer," Izumo returned. "Creepy as hell to know someone can tamper with your brain."
He yawned and snuggled closer.
"Mm, I suppose it all depends on who you talk to," he whispered with a smile as Izumo curled closer, lowering a kiss to the top of his head. "I don't find it creepy. Then again, I think I'm a bit biased, don't you?" He laughed softly, running his fingers gently along Izumo's waist.
Yeah, he was biased in the fact that Izumo meant too much to allow that little thing to creep him out. Then again, it wouldn't have, anyway. He was curious about the genjutsu, wanted to know how it worked, what it was like. Anything new to him had his attention.
"You're sleeping with me, so my judgment's impaired," he continued with a laugh, allowing it to be a joke.
"Damn straight," Izumo muttered, achieving a further state of boneless as he dipped towards sleep again. Chatty Balfour. Hmmph. Ought to shut him up. But...sleepy.
"You do know that my offer still stands, right?" he said quietly, lips moving against Izumo's ear. His fingers combed through his hair gently, soothing him the best he could. It was nice to be with him, at least, nice to be curled up close.
And he stopped that train of thought immediately. It was dangerous, after all. He really needed to get out and find himself a lover instead of clinging to Izumo.
"What offer?" Izumo slurred, cracking an eye open with intense effort.
"The one about bringing out a memory," he murmured, fingers ghosting along his shoulder, lips lowering to his forehead. Izumo was tired, so he shouldn't be bothering him about such a thing. He just smiled against his forehead, the kiss lingering just a moment longer than necessary. "I really don't mind. Once probably won't hurt anything."
"That's what they all say," Izumo groaned and rolled onto his back, stretching. "Balfour, why?"
"Admittedly, because I'm curious," he whispered, shifting to remain close to Izumo, his arm looping around his waist as his eyes drifted closed for a moment. "I wouldn't ask if I didn't trust you, you know that, not to mention you need the practice, right?" His fingers rubbed gently along his side.
"Curiosity killed the godsdamn cat," Izumo retorted. "Better reason. Start talking. Why do you want me to fuck with your head so bad?"
"Well, that is why..." He knew that curiosity killed the cat and knew that it was likely to get him killed as well, but it was the truth.
"I want to know how it works, what it's like, you know? I know you told me, but that's no substitute for experience."
And, though he wouldn't admit it, not even to himself, it would be nice to see his brother again, even if it was only an illusion. He often did wonder what his brother thought of what he was doing.
"Because I want my neurons, psyche, and emotions screwed over. You could just do drugs and get about the same effect, you know," Izumo declared, and rolled over again to lightly bite Balfour's shoulder. "Look, I am giving you the chance to persuade me. You're not doing well. Last try."
Balfour groaned slightly at the bite, his head dropping a little bit as he scooted closer.
"You know I can't think when you bite me," he murmured, deciding to buy time by kissing him instead, because that made it so much easier to think.
It was hard to explain something you refused to admit even to yourself, so Balfour was casting around for a different reason, one that wouldn't sound so pitiful, yet still be true. He had absolutely nothing, though, and had successfully distracted himself by kissing Izumo passionately.
"Mmm, pretty persuasive," Izumo admitted, after the kiss. Balfour was getting to be quite good with his tongue.
Balfour laughed softly, deciding to not let him in on the fact that he was just buying time, more or less, mostly because he'd forgotten any arguments he might have come up with during the kiss. He pressed a fleeting kiss to Izumo's lips after a moment, reaching up to skate his fingers along his jaw.
"So?"
"We will regret this in the morning. Think of a particular memory, close your eyes and relive it, and tell me when you think you're ready." Izumo knew Balfour was not going to shut up about it any time soon, and he wanted to rest in peace. So he'd give the brat what he wanted, and may he enjoy it.
He held up his hands and started weaving them through signs, chakra flaring softly.
Balfour smiled happily and softly, leaning forward to kiss him again before settling against him and lowering his head to rest on his shoulder, eyes closing as he cast around for a memory, then smiling as he brought to mind learning to cook, his sister, only three, covered in flour, his brother, twelve, throwing more at him and Carina. It was a wonderful memory. He missed them both.
"I'm ready," he whispered.
"Oh. The more recent the memory, the easier on your brain, or that's the current theory anyway." Izumo demurred. "Just in case that changes your mind."
"This one is the best one," he said softly with a smile, but he cast around a little more, trying to find one with them all a little bit older. The only one that came to mind was the one, about four years ago, with his little sister and his older brother, Amery giving them both hugs, telling Balfour to be careful and take care of Carina. It was the most open he was. Then another, this one with just Amery, not much more recent than the one with him saying his goodbyes. Amery looked worn and weary, but he had a smile for Balfour, the blush on the younger boy's cheeks when he saw the chief sergeant amusing him a little. That was the one he latched on to, the last time he'd seen his brother. They'd gone to see fireworks that night.
"Ready."
"Alright." Izumo reached out and laid his hand on Balfour's chest. He let the jutsu go, chakra flaring, then settling.
He'd get a sense of it, too, holding the jutsu, ready and waiting. It was almost like a trap, open to whatever was put in it, but not. It would dig deep into Balfour's mind, pull out the details he didn't consciously recall. The human mind was an amazing thing, and people could remember so much more than they thought, shelved deep inside the twists of the mind. Smell, colour, textures....all this and more.
Izumo felt along the chakra and waited for the memory.
Balfour's hand came up to rest on Izumo's, and he took a deep breath, focusing, and the first thing that appeared were fireworks, bright and cheerful, but so clearly in the distance, and then Amery was sitting on a slanted surface--a roof--in a leather jacket and woolen pants, his hair mussed somewhat as opposed to the way it was always brushed back. He was laughing, such a rare sight for Balfour. It brought a quiet laugh to his lips, something hauntingly close to a sob.
So that was Amery. A brother by shared features, and Balfour had spoken only of one. Izumo found himself not much impressed. In his opinion, Balfour was better-looking; a certain sweetness of spirit in the face. He watched, and he listened, cataloging expression, mannerism, voice and face. It was habit: this was a tool he could use if ever need came.
Friend or foe, Izumo always knew a weak spot.
Balfour's attention was fully on the illusion of his brother, who was speaking of the last week or so in the Airman, saying softly that he was proud of Balfour for going to the Versity. As the illusion wore on, though, the fireworks ending, Amery's face closed off and he ran white-gloved hands through his hair to comb it back--clearly where Balfour had gotten the habit--and stood.
"I must get back. I'm glad I was able to spend time with you, though. You should come by next week. We can have a picnic..."
"Next week never came," Balfour whispered, but if it was to the illusion or to Izumo, it wasn't obvious. He clenched his eyes shut and turned his head. He couldn't handle much more.
Izumo left the illusion dissipate, and touched Balfour's face softly to draw him back to reality. He expected some confusion or disorientation from the other: such reactions were very normal.
"Balfour," he called, his own voice much deeper than Amery's.
Balfour was shaky as he opened his eyes again, smiling a little bit at Izumo and pressing a kiss to his chin.
"Thank you," he whispered, his voice just as shaky. Part of him wished he had chosen one of the memories with Carina in it, mainly because Amery's mask never came back during those, but he had chosen the last time he'd seen his brother. Foolish choice, he realized now.
"Is your head supposed to hurt after?" He didn't mention the fact that he was a bit dizzy. The way his hands were tight on Izumo's shoulders should have said something about the disorientation.
"Yeah, sometimes. I told you it was rough." Izumo kissed Balfour on the cheek, but he moved as little as possible to do so. He still vaguely remembered the ugly sick feeling he'd had when he'd been put under a genjutsu for the first time.
"Just breathe and you'll be fine," he murmured.
"I..." He took a deep breath, then another, leaning against the kiss to his cheek. He was glad that it was Izumo and not someone trying to pull him apart. It was hard on the person, apparently.
"I needed that, apparently. Thank you." He smiled up at Izumo, pressing a kiss to his lips, seeming a little bit more stable. "I don't know why I chose that one, though. I should have chosen the cooking one. You would have enjoyed that one."
But apparently he had needed to hear those four words from his brother.
"Just breathe and be still." Izumo huffed a chuckle. "If you thought that was rough, try getting a kunai through your throat as your first."
"Ooh, definitely not something I'd like to experience," he said with a quiet chuckle, falling still as he curled close. "Even still, I'm glad it was you I asked to do it, not someone else." He was right to trust him, that much he knew.
"Thank you for that." He would be sure to not ask for that again. That was a little bit disturbing.
"The fireworks were beautiful that night, weren't they? It was a summer festival, I remember that much. I'd taken Carina earlier that day. That was also the first day I met Adamo. I think...I remember Amery laughing at something and I didn't know what... I think I know now. I think he was laughing at the fact that, well...I had a crush on Adamo from the first day."
He wanted to talk about it, about what Izumo had brought out. It had been intensely personal, but Izumo was part of it, and there was no reason to pretend otherwise.
"This Adamo of yours must either be very good looking or a hell of a man," Izumo declared, playfully. "Which is it, then?"
"Both, actually," he said softly. "Adamo was a warrior, that much was for sure, born and bred in the military, a talented tactician...and, what surprised me most of all about him, was the fact that he was so warm-hearted. I hadn't expected it, not from someone who had to spend so much time yelling his men down." But he never would forget the anger in his eyes when he found Balfour tied to the shower, the compassion and regret when he had come to fetch him, the worry when he'd almost gotten himself killed.
"I never had a chance, but..." But he'd fallen in love. He was finally moving on, at least, something he'd never expected to happen.
"I really do think you would have liked him. He would have been a huge help in the game, at least," he said with a laugh, nuzzling his face into Izumo's neck. "He wouldn't have thrown the knife. He would have gone over and slit the man's throat, no bones about it."
"Sure you had a chance. That's just something to say when you're too afraid to gamble." Izumo ran his fingers through Balfour's short dark hair. "And that still wouldn't have been helpful anyway. The flag needed to be gotten. I can take care of myself."
To a point, after which he was dead meat but that wasn't what Balfour needed to hear.
Balfour laughed softly, shaking his head.
"No, I truly didn't. The man was straight as an arrow, unfortunately. I think he might have had a wife, but I'm not positive."
Then again, he didn't know much about his chief sergeant's personal affairs.
"And he would have sent you after the flag, knowing him. Ah, but at least he could also follow orders. Unfortunately...I sort of...can't. I'll get better, though. Considering training, you know?"
"I have had quite a few passionate nights with married straight men," Izumo pointed out. "For one mission I was even the kept lover to a straight married man. It got tangled when the wife sneaked in to cheat on her husband with his lover! Now that was an adventure."
He tugged lightly at Balfour's hair. "You make a better healer than soldier. And don't ask me to help teach you, I suck as a teacher. No patience."
"Well, considering I got thrown into a game without even volunteering," he said softly, grinning at the tugging at his hair, head tilting back slightly, neck arched in invitation. "I figure a bit of training would be good for me. You yelling at me...probably not so much." He laughed a little more. He had already accepted the fact that Izumo probably wasn't the one to teach him to fight.
"As for Adamo, even if he had been willing, it still wouldn't have been good to sleep with him. He was my commander, after all, and it wouldn't do to complicate things any more than they already were."
"Mmm, are you wise or prudish?" Izumo mused, and bent to nibble at Balfour's exposed throat. "With an answer like that..."
"Hmm, both, I suppose. Possibly closer to prudish," he whispered. "Looking back, I still think it was best that I didn't get involved with him."
He frowned slightly, shifting closer. Why hadn't he chosen one where Izumo could see Adamo? It would have been less emotional, at least.
"Ah, well, had I done so... Well, I likely would have ended up dead. I'm lucky I survived the first time I did something stupid."
“What was it?” Izumo wanted to know. He pushed Balfour over onto his back, then crawled on top. Hah. Chest-to-chest he kissed Balfour on the lips and lazily tangled their legs together.
Balfour rolled easily onto his back when pushed, his arms looping around Izumo’s waist, returning the kiss slowly, sensually, stalling for time. When the kiss broke, he traced his fingers down the line of Izumo’s spine.
“That scar,” he whispered. “You know the one. I was trying to...to...”
He frowned. No, that wouldn’t do.
“They had Adamo and Proudmouth, chains over her, arrows at him. Anastasia tried to talk me out of it, but, well, I wasn’t going to let them die. Had her destroy the chains...tail came down wrong on one. I don’t remember much after that except waking up in the medical wing.”
He frowned, looking away from Izumo, clearly ashamed.
“And what was stupid about that?” Izumo wanted to know, reaching up to run his fingers through Balfour’s hair, frame his face, feather over his shoulders. He kissed Balfour’s chin.
“Same thing that was stupid about almost anything I did, back then. Too much heart, not enough brain. Even Adamo read me the riot act for trying to save him, though he blamed himself for getting into such a situation.”
He had gotten in over his head.
Izumo considered this, and kissed Balfour’s throat. “But did you know you could do it?”
“I thought I could, and...maybe if we hadn’t misjudged the angle on that last one, I might have been successful, but then what could we do after that? They would have shot at us, then, and we would have been in the same situation.”
But he hadn’t wanted the mountains to have a new red paint job, especially not courtesy of his chief sergeant, so he had acted.
“But he had not been completely disabled? Only trapped?” Izumo queried, digging after his point.
“They were shooting arrows at him,” he said pointedly. He would have been dead had much more time passed. “And I practically threw a knife at the man’s enemy.”
Just like in the games.
“I’m protective of my friends, Izumo, to the point of idiocy, crushes even more so. If I had gotten into anything with him, everything would have gone belly-up. I wouldn’t have thought, just acted.”
Thankfully, for now, Izumo was still in the close friends category.
“I do not think you were quite as stupid as you think you were,” Izumo declared, rising up on his elbows. “Rescues are damn tricky but an attempt needs to be made.”
He kissed Balfour on the end of his nose. “We say it at home, Konoha takes care of her own. That’s why the Games are so much worse. At home I knew no matter what dungeon or torture chamber I was in, they’d try to save me. Here? No-one cares.”
“You’re wrong,” he said softly, his arms sliding further around Izumo, leaning up to kiss him on the chin. “You’re so wrong about that. I can name at least one person who cares, who’d try to save you.”
Not that he’d be successful, but he’d give it a damn good try.
Izumo snorted. “And how many games will you be in with me?” he asked. “The Scientists, the sponsors...they don’t give a damn.” He slipped down and kissed Balfour deeply.
Balfour returned the kiss with a quiet groan, arching up against him, hands coming to tangle in his hair. He loved when Izumo kissed him like that. He didn’t say anything about the kiss when they broke it, though, only sighed.
“You’re my best friend, Izumo,” he admitted softly. “My closest friend. I...I don’t want to see you hurt, and if I thought I could protect you, I’d do it.” But he was a terrible soldier and a worse bodyguard. “I have to train up a bit before I get into another game.” With that, he laughed, pressing a kiss to his forehead.
“How about this, though. Until I’m good enough, if you get hurt, I’ll come see you?” But if it was outside of the games, well, whoever had hurt Izumo would be able to count on an angry Balfour.
“I don’t think you should be in any games at all. And definitely come see me.” Izumo nodded, and kissed Balfour again, deeply, thoroughly.
Balfour groaned into the kiss, fingers curling against his scalp as he shifted, pulling Izumo closer, arm around his waist holding tightly.
“I still need to train,” he whispered after the kiss had been broken. “They threw me in one and they can do it again.”
But that kiss had gotten good to him, so he leaned up for another, sealing their lips together firmly.
-Truth.
Izumo sketched the sign over Balfour’s shoulder and chest, kissing him deeply, moaning softly, and pressing his hips against Balfour’s. Too early for another round? Maybe maybe not. Either way it felt good.
Balfour moaned softly into the kiss as well, taking a deep, slow breath, but then broke the kiss to track the fingers on his shoulders and chest, tilting his head.
“What does that mean?” he asked, tracing a similar--short by only a couple gestures--pattern against Izumo’s back.
Izumo snorted and slowly did it again across Balfour’s chest. “Truth. Also can mean right, or go ahead if I add this.” A second flicking stroke at the end. “It’s scout sign.”
Balfour mimicked the movements against Izumo’s back, adding the second stroke, even, when it was shown to him.
“You need to show me these,” he murmured. “I have no idea what they are. We never used them.”
“Mmm, why? I need some secrets. Scout sign wouldn’t be very useful to you anyway....as far as I know only ninja use it, and spies, and the like.” Izumo nuzzled at Balfour’s neck.
“Because you were using it with me anyway,” he murmured, tilting his neck again, giving Izumo plenty of room there. “So if you’re going to use it, why not teach me?”
He smiled, fingers tracing down his back again, then flattening his hand for the upstroke, just feeling, enjoying the contact.
“I probably couldn’t teach you all of it,” Izumo answered. “It’s complicated and a lot of it is situational.” He nipped at Balfour’s throat, teeth grazing skin. “I know about three different ones, too, from different villages. And I know a little of ANBU sign, which is supposed to be secret.”
He nipped again, mouthed over Balfour’s throat, tasting salt and flesh, the unique taste of Balfour and Balfour alone.
He groaned, arching his neck as he felt the tongue, letting out another slow breath.
“Teach me your favorites,” he murmured. “And the useful ones.” He never knew if he’d need them, and it was a good thing, to him, to be learning things from Izumo. At least, when asked, he could say that he was learning sign language from him.
Teeth pressed against flesh, just a nibble, and then Izumo moved lower and bit, junction of neck and shoulder. He pressed against Balfour’s arch, rolled his hips, and wondered why Balfour would want to learn sign.
Balfour groaned and gave up on talking when Izumo bit his neck and shoulder, rolling his hips in return and turning his head to capture his lips, rolling them both slightly to be on top, then pulling back with a teasing smile.
“Fine, we’ll talk about it tomorrow,” he murmured, then dove back in for another kiss.
He didn’t mind spending his night like that either.