[His face is punched]
To my loyal subjects,
Today, under threat of being punched again, I have decided to resign. All laws made up to this point will be enforced for 5 more months and then it will revert to the default rules set by the magic of the town or to the rules set by my replacement.

The legal age of consent is 30, and every week, on every device, Myles Amil will deliver a mayoral address as the acting mayor in my resignation. All of my slaves are being freed and all of my pets will be euthanized.

Please remember that although I will be rotting in prison for my crimes against humanity, anyone who doesn't get married will be rotting in hell for eternity.

I love you and goodnight.

[Tonys, Neds, MJs, Peters, Pyotr, any other science people]
I solved it! I fixed addiction.

During the body-swap magic, MJ and Evan switched bodies but not minds. MJ was placed into Evan's body, and Evan has never taken drugs before so his body has never had a chemical dependency. When MJ was in Evan's body, she had no cravings for drugs whatsoever and when Evan was in MJ's body, he was practically clawing the webs off to get free, doing anything he could to get drugs.

We can help all of the addicts in our city the same way. There are people in the city who are able to make bodies. If we can find a way to transfer someone's mind into a new fully functional body, people can really quit when they're ready to. People like MJ who made mistakes and want to be better, would never have to live with cravings again.

The only thing we need to get access to are healthy live bodies that nobody's using and more drug addicts who want to get better.