Rikki Barnes aka Nomad (nomaderwhat) wrote in starnomad, @ 2015-09-08 10:23:00 |
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Entry tags: | character: jacen solo, character: jovan drark, character: lyric, character: rikki barnes, character: tenel ka djo, date: [61.10], location: shooting star |
Who: Rikki Barnes, Jacen Solo, & Lyric (and assorted others on the Myrkr team)
When: 61.10
Where: The Shooting Star
What: The plan's gone over and Jacen tries to lift Rikki's spirit before they're in Yuuzhan Vong space.
Rating: Low
Status: COMPLETE.
There were eleven of them gathered in the main hold of the Shooting Star, seven Jedi, three incredibly capable non-Jedi, and one droid and it left the room fairly crowded. You couldn't have put anyone else on the ship and flown comfortably, although everyone had enough space to stand, or in some cases sit as Rikki outlined what she knew about the mission and what they were flying into. Jacen stood near the back of the hold, his back up against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest as he listened. Having gone over the mission with her one on one not a day before meant that most of this was repeat and Jacen was able to evaluate the group. Rikki was the commander, and she had named Darius as her second. Jacen couldn't say that he was thrilled with that - as he didn't know a lot about the street kid and former (presumably) Peace Brigade contact - but he had provided enough valuable intel that he couldn't deny that what Darius had brought them would help them get through this mission alive. And if Rikki trusted him, Jacen was willing to extend the trust as well. What had surprised him just a little is when Rikki told him that he was third - if something happened to her or to Darius, then the rest of the mission would be in his hands, and it would be his responsibility to get everyone safely home. It was a responsibility he hoped he wouldn't have to do anything with because he had a feeling that if both Rikki and Darius were unable to keep commanding it wouldn't mean anything good for the mission. Lyric rounded out the other non-Jedi of the group, someone who had a decent knowledge of the peace brigade and the ability to bluff his way into situations and out of them - and who was a decent shot when handed a blaster and of course he'd had one since he'd boarded the Falcon. The Jedi were a group that was more mixed, some had been recruited specifically by Rikki, others had been recruited by Jaina, but between them they offered skills in piloting, mechanics, fighting, and healing - although it was mostly Jacen providing that final skill and while he had some proclivity for it, he hoped that there wouldn't be a great need to make use of those skills. He was certainly going to be spending some time with a datapad and refreshing his understanding of using the Force on other Jedi and also on non-Jedi. The Twi'lek Rar sisters would be providing ground support and stealth, the Rodian Jovan Drark would offer ground support and was one of the best shooters that the Jedi had. Zekk had been recruited by Jaina and would be working with mechanics alongside her, and Tenel Ka had piloting knowledge as well as fighting skill that was among the best in the group. Jacen had watched the unease as Rikki explained what they were looking for, and what they were going to be potentially up against, but he had to give the entire group kudos for asking questions and pouring themselves into the task. He hoped that their support, determination, and enthusiasm would bolster Rikki herself. He knew that somehow Anakin had uncovered something and Lyric had walked in on Rikki and Anakin having a discussion, presumably about this, and while it was probably not obvious to most of the rest of the group, even the other Jedi, Jacen knew Rikki too well - it had bothered her more than she was letting on. He reached out in the Force sending support and strength her direction. Whether she'd get it or not or be aware of it or not he didn't know - probably not since she didn't have any strong Force sensitivity, but hopefully she would still be encouraged. "I'd like to spend some time with what you have on the Voxyn," Tenel Ka spoke simply as Rikki finished. "Anyone who wishes to join me is welcome." Alema and Numa glanced at each other and stood to leave with Tenel Ka. Darius had slipped back to the cock-pit nearly as soon as it had appeared that Rikki was finished with her presentation and now Jaina and Zekk headed back to double check the escape pods and run a few more systems check. That left Jovan, Rikki, Lyric and Jacen in the room and Jacen glanced over to catch Lyric's eyes. "We have no intelligence about whether or not they've created one yet?" Jovan was asking Rikki. "No." Rikki frowned slightly as she ran over what information they did have in her mind. Reports were scattered and even with coruacant being a hub for the galaxy not everything actually passed through there. Still Darius' contacts believing he was still on their side was invaluable. While the Jedi had their doubts about him and they were more than justified to, Rikki had seen enough to know in her gut he could be trusted. "But we've had increased activity there in the past few weeks. If they haven't created one than they're definitely getting close." "Jedi hunting monsters. Just what I wanted to sign up for." Lyric sighed easily as jacens glance caught his own. The urgency in Rikki's mission made a lot more sense now that it was all laid out. Anakins a sense made even more. If he had a way to convince rikki to not include Jacen he would have. But instead she had done the crazy thing and actually made him one of the leads on this mission. As if Jacen needed more of a reason to feel responsible for everyone. "I told you that it'd be exciting." A weak smile was all she could force together. She looked older than when he had seen her in coruacant, tired. The fight with anakin would hardly have helped. And if he knew either of them then Lyric knew they were both going to be stubborn. "Next time I'll take less exciting. I'm not sure any of you know what that is though." He sighed but reached out to rest his hand on jacens shoulder with a quiet bit of affection, grounding himself to his Jedi. There was more at risk to Lyric than just some order than would be hunted down. These voxyn were another threat to Jacen, and his solo had enough threats to deal with as it was. Rikki watched them for a moment of Lyric didn't know any better he would have sworn for a second that her eyes sank into despair before pulling herself back together. "We can go over what we have of the map again though." She said instead of whatever she was actually thinking, looking over at Jovan. He couldn't have been much older than Elix. Sure Lyric knew that wasn't why they were here at all but he couldn't help but wonder. The rodian was taller than his girl, but then again he didn't know just how different men and women were for that species at this age. In the back of his mind the question hung but he refrained from asking. Jovan nodded, either oblivious to or ignoring the tension that Rikki felt. "Then we need to assume we'll be dealing with them and be prepared to deal with that. And probably the idea that we may have more than one. Those of you who aren't Jedi," he looked up at Rikki and then his gaze fell to Lyric. "May have a certain advantage in the sense that these creatures aren't going to be looking for you specifically. " It wasn't a pleasant thought, but Jacen couldn't deny that Jovan made good sense. The Rodian was younger than Anakin, but he'd always had a good sense about him, and right now he was in clear planning mode. Jacen watched him look back at Rikki and his lips came together in an expression that Jacen recognized from time spent with Elix as sheer determination. Something about how it looked on a Rodian face was different enough that Jacen wasn't certain he would have recognized it a few month previously. "Let's look at the maps," he nodded to Rikki as he stepped past her. "Whatever we know about our terrain going in is going to help us ultimately." As Jovan turned to exit, Jacen's hand lifted gently to the back of Lyric's neck, his fingers finding the soft dark curls and sliding in amongst them without any words accompanying the gesture. The truth was that while he knew he ought to follow Rikki and Jovan he didn't want to in the moment, wanting instead to find a moment to speak with Lyric quietly, separately, something that might not be easy to find the further into the mission that they got. He was worried about Rikki as he watched her - she looked tired. Determined, yes, but there was an edge to her words that Jacen didn't like. It was a look he might even go so far as to call fatalistic. "It's better to get them now, before they've mass produced them," he said softly in response to Lyric's earlier statement. "There's a reason I kept our number mixed when it came to force users." Rikki offered a weak, grim smile before jerking her head towards the cockpit. She fell into motion easy, ready to go over the maps with darius' ever helpful interjections. "Come on though, you might see something I missed tactically." Lyric watched Rikki and the rodian Jedi leave. Despite himself it was only natural when no eyes were watching to ease into the warm pressure of Jacens fingers tangled in his hair. As dark as their purpose was that small touch made the Galaxy seem for the moment at peace even with the gnawing nerve in his stomach that had a bad feeling about this entire plan. "There's a reason I'm here." Lyric chuckled softly, the sound warm yet he knew that Jacen knew enough rehear the bravado in it. Reaching up he ran his fingers along the hand tangling in his hair, holdi g it in place as he leaned in to press a kiss against the skin of Jacens arm. It was a risk to be affectionate even if Rikki knew. But Jacen was at risk as the rest of the Jedi with these monsters possibly on the loose. So Lyric found at the moment he didn't care. The affection made Jacen's heart leap as it so often did. For the moment they were alone - the group dispersed to their various projects - and yes it could change at any moment, but more than likely Jacen would be able to tell when it did, so for the moment he turned his attention onto Lyric, his eyes sought out Lyric's dark ones and searched them. He suspected Lyric was as worried as he was himself, but the other boy was doing his best not to show it - as was Jacen - but neither of them needed to be so brave. His fingers curled warm against the back of Lyric's neck and he stepped forward to bring his other arm onto Lyric's chest and sliding it down to rest on his waist for a moment. "And it's not to do anything stupid and get yourself hurt," Jacen teased lightly. "Just a for your information sort of reminder. As the Solo, I'm the one who is supposed to do the stupid things, and you aren't a Solo, so you don't get to." The thought that Lyric would make a really pretty Solo slid into Jacen's head and out of it equally quickly. Lyric could possibly be an honorary Solo - but not this trip. He dropped a light kiss on Lyric's jaw and pulled back so they were not continuing to stand so close - that was something that really was tempting someone to see them. Instead he stepped across to the small table in the corner of the main holding area and slid into the booth, his head nodded for Lyric to come and join him. They could sit next to each other, hold hands, it wasn't quite the privacy of a bunk, but on a ship like this even the bunks were not overly private. "I've never seen her look like this," he said softly his attention turning back to Rikki despite the nearness of Lyric to him. Jacen had to know the fire that always seemed to follow his touch. It was so easy to just let himself be guided into jacens arms, his own finding Jacens waist for the brief moment that he was close enough. But it was all a risk, just like the lips against his jaw that he could still feel even with Jacen pulling away. "Someone has to protect you from your own stupidity." He sighed, but the affection managed to slip through the quiet boredom he put on. As much as he trusted Rikki the fact remained that this mission was more dangerous than he would like. But the facts were there, if the voxyn were released that could spell devastation for the Jedi. And as Lyric followed Jacen into the booth, his hand automatically seeking its counterpart in his solo to grasp right, Lyric knew that he could stand for that chance against the Jedi even if most of the order bordered on useless in his opinion. "Anakin wasn't kind." Lyric answered, careful to keep judgement out of it. But this has to be more than anakin. Or maybe it wasn't. Rikki wasn't that much older than them and as far as Lyric knew she hadn't been interested in anyone since her fiancé's death. And now there was anakin. A broken heart could do some Terrible things from what he had seen. Jacen kept his hand laced through Lyric's. The mission was on his mind, of course, and there were things that they would need to look into as they progressed but right now his focus was on the man beside him and the woman who was leading them into danger. Both of them were among the people he cared most about who were on this mission. Jaina and Tenel Ka also fell into that category, but outside of the normal danger the mission represented there wasn't the emotional change that he'd felt in Rikki. "Anakin was angry at being left behind," Jacen said softly. "It doesn't surprise me that he wouldn't be kind. He isn't known for always thinking before he says something or rushes into a place, and diplomacy isn't usually his best skill." He loved his brother dearly, but there were times when Jacen wished that Anakin would think - would use the Force a bit more - and he still had a lot to learn. His thumb drifted across Lyric's hand lightly, rubbing along the skin in a way that was intended to comfort outside of the immediate connection even. He couldn't help but think about what Rikki had told him about Anakin. But Anakin wasn't going on this mission and she shouldn't be worrying about this - because Anakin wasn't going to be there to be injured or hurt in any way. "I think she's just had a bad feeling about this whole thing - I don't know. It feels like more than just the fight might have caused to be honest, but more importantly - we need to be positive going into this. It's going to be a dangerous fight - we need to believe we're all coming out the other side." Or they might not. "You can be positive for all of us, beautiful." Lyric leaned his head in close with a cocky grin momentarily flashing. No one was here and he was tempted to take the risk to kiss Jacen. But they both knew that this would likely be the only chance they got to talk, to deal with the nagging pull that this whole mission seemed to have. Sure they were going to save the Jedi but Lyric had seen enough to know that those dire sorts of missions seemed to happen more than he would like. Instead he settled for pulling jacens hand up, pressing a quick kiss against the back before letting it fall back into the shadows, tightly held within his own. Anakin might have been mad but not every mission needed every person. And if Rikki had a bad feeling, well, the woman had better instincts than most people Lyric ran into. "It would be easier if she didn't have that feeling." Lyrics smile disappeared again as he sighed. "She's uncanny with things like that. Her bad feeling might as well be an intelligence report." She might be paranoid, and really she was possibly even more than Lyric was. But Lyric was a pretty good judge of when she was paranoid and when she had that true sense that might as well be up there with a Jedi. Lyric's response teased a smile to Jacen's lips and he lifted his head to smile at those beautiful dark eyes. There had been something about Lyric that Jacen would never understand, but from the beginning he had offered this sense of hope and peace and calm. It had made no sense to Jacen that such light would have its source here, but the longer they'd known each other the more certain it had become that despite the practical and at times paranoid realism that Lyric offered, he also gave Jacen hope. And right now his gentle tease pulled hope up and settled it in Jacen's chest. "That's a lot of weight on my shoulders. I don't know if I can live up to all that," Jacen teased lightly in return. But he sobered a bit as he considered. "The number of times I have wondered if she doesn't have some Force sensitivity," he mused aloud. But Rikki did seem to have an uncanny ability to tell if something would go wrong and Jacen couldn't be terribly sad that his brother had been left behind whatever Anakin's feelings on the matter might be. "But we can only hope that they haven't successfully created one of these. This mission will be difficult enough as it is. Enemy territory, a lot of Jedi on one ship, and if they get word of that for some reason... But if they have managed to create one or more of these creatures then we're dealing with that as well." He was quiet for a moment. "They are being created from this galaxy so maybe I'll be able to feel them in the Force. If I can... There is at least some chance of influencing them." Jacen sighed and leaned his head back against the wall behind him. It was a moment of vulnerability he would allow few others to see. "Rikki may have a feeling on this one, but I don't. I know it'll be dangerous and I know I want you to be careful," a small smile turned up at the corners of his lips. "But at the same time, I'm glad you're here. It's been... I've gotten used to working with you. You're a good person to have around." "You'll figure it out." Lyric said, and he actually believed it. Jacen was one of the few people in this galaxy Lyric did believe them, a rank of people that he could count on one hand. But Jacen was kind and Jacen was clever, and more than anything he just seemed to have a sense with animals. It wasn't something that Lyric had seen a lot of in their travels together but he'd seen and heard enough about this man to know that if anyone had a shot it would be him. "Maybe this is what all that weird pet collecting over the years was building up to." he teased affectionately. Watching Jacen all Lyric wanted to do was be able to reach out and hold him. But for now he settled on keeping a grip on his hand, warm and safe with as much affection as they could risk in this small a space. These were Jacen's people, it would be his choice when or if they would ever know what was going on. And Lyric was all right with that. The people he cared about already knew. "You can't flatter your way into my pants, Solo." Lyric chuckled as he leaned in to whisper. "It's a small ship." Lyric's belief was as warm as his hand wrapped around Jacen's. When it came down to it, Jacen could name no one else that he felt believed in him the way that Lyric did. He knew that his parents did, and his Uncle did, and perhaps even his siblings and Rikki trusted him - but there was something different about Lyric and the way that belief bolstered his own spirits even when he was exhausted and otherwise struggling. It was that look across a dark room that had pulled him in. It was why despite differences in background, and even in their approach to a situation, Jacen knew he could count on Lyric. "Maybe it was," Jacen returned. "Surely there ought to have been some point to all of my various creatures. You know, when we have a place sometime - we're going to have to have a pet or two. Exotic and unusual, and interesting enough to find in the Force..." He looked over to see Lyric's reaction to this statement. It was lighter than the moment really deserved to be by all rights, but he couldn't quite stop the tease as he turned into drop his lips next to Lyric's ear, nearly touching them but almost. "I don't need to flatter my way into your pants. You've always dropped them on my command." If Lyric was surprised by the sudden declaration of their future he didn't show it. The same easy smile that seemed to show up just got Jacen stayed in place even as his heart skipped. Just a few months ago the idea of a future with anyone but maybe Elix around seemed impossible, a fantasy that he could never risk indulging in. But with Jacen it seemed attainable, like something that was just out of their grasp but that soon he could reach for and it'd be tangible. "Just as long as you know you're the one taking care of them. Elix never brought anything home so I've no idea what I'm doing." he mused, content with how easy it was to imagine something simple and domestic with Jacen. But his eyes widened just a fraction at the game Jacen decided that he wanted to play. There was a moment where Lyric's smarter brain pointed out that this was a danger they really didn't need and that they should have gotten this out of their system before departing. Granted Lyric could not be faulted for lack of trying on that. But that moment passed easily, his head turning to look Jacen over before meeting up to his eyes. "Careful with your commands, princess." His hand slipped away from Jacen's fingers to trace along his thigh instead, equally content to drive Jacen mad. There was hardly anything they could do here in the open when they could be walked in on at any moment and Jacen had learned at least that lessons after being caught by his Father. It wasn't something he wanted to repeat with say Tenel Ka, or his sister, or any of the crew on board. But driving Lyric to distraction was almost as appealing as Lyric's fingers sliding up along Jacen's thigh. Both gave him delight, a heady feeling of both controlling Lyric's reactions, and wanting to simply give into his own. For the moment, however, he kept his tone controlled, cool after the low warmth he'd applied only a moment before. "I very much know what I'm doing," Jacen said easily, with a question about whether or not he was talking about the animals or something else entirely. "You won't need to worry about anything. I'll take it all into hand." "Oh I'm not worried." Lyric cocked an eyebrow easily as his hand trailed up further. This was entirely inappropriate and he knew it, but Jacen never stopped him. All it would have taken was one word but that word never came, instead Jacen encouraged and teased until Lyric could barely think straight. Instead his thoughts were occupied by the man beside him, a fate that he was finding himself to be content with. But the moment couldn't last, not in a ship this small, not with a mission this large baring down on them. Reality snapped back as Rikki walked into the room, darkness clouding around her. Lyric's back straightened as he watched her, pulling his hand away as all attention was placed on the woman who looked like she might fall over. Her skin was pale, the blood having drained away, shadows under her eyes as she reached up and pressed her palms against them. Looking up, she gave them a perfectly crafted smile that only increased Lyric's worry. "Oh, you two are still here." she said off hand, a small awkward attempt at a laugh following. "Yeah, for now." Lyric's hand returned to Jacen's, tangling fingers together as his stomach dropped, a cool chill running through his veins. "The terrain overview go all right?" Her lips were pressed thin. "Yeah. Really it's just going over and over information at this point." It wasn't surprising when someone walked back through, and Jacen probably should have been grateful that it was before anything had gone much further, but as it was Rikki, it felt a bit as if ice cubes had been trickled down his back and he turned serious, his eyes turning to watch one of his closest friends. Her smile couldn't fool Jacen. Rikki had some practice at trying to keep her emotions under control and Jacen would give her that, but this was an undercurrent that was honestly worrisome and part of him wondered if the other Jedi could feel it. If so - and it wasn't impossible - that could have a negative affect on everything. It was the piece of the conversation he and Lyric had been having before they got distracted, and Lyric's words floated in his head for a moment and what to do felt like an impossible decision to make. For someone who a moment before had been making extremely questionable choices on the drop of a hat, he was back to trying to think through every possibility - the best way to approach one of his closest friends... Jacen squeezed Lyric's hand gently before he let go and pulled himself out of the seat, taking a step towards Rikki and offering her the hand that had been Lyric's a moment before. "Come sit down with us for a minute, Rikki," he said. "I want to ask you something." There was still some uncertainty, but there was a piece of this that might fall into place - and it might give them a better shot if things turned bad or if one of them got captured, or injured badly. You can be positive for all of us, beautiful. He couldn't be, not by himself, but together they might be able to bolster each other. Perhaps he could even help to bolster Rikki and Lyric and Darius. It might not work to the same degree, but they could be felt in the Force, so they could interact with it - probably. Maybe. The smile became a little more relieved as Jacen offered his hand. Even if he was asking more questions the fact that it was offered seemed to lift a little bit of the weight from her soul. Nearly two years of constant preparation, nearly reinventing herself, and now she was at the cusp of what it had all been for. Anakin might be angry but once he understood he would know why she had to do what she did. It had to be okay. Taking his hand, Rikki followed him easily to her seat. "You know pretty much everything I do." she sighed softly as she took her seat. "We've got a good team I think. Jaina added some good last minute additions, and Master Skywalker doesn't seem to disapprove as much as he could." Lyric wrapped an arm around Rikki's shoulders as she sat, her head naturally falling to rest on his shoulder like it had so many times before int he Undercity. There was a comfort, an ease to this that didn't fit with what she felt raging inside. "Yeah, you gave a pretty convincing presentation." Lyric offered easily. Jacen slid in next to her keeping his hand around hers as he watched her. If he couldn't bolster her with the Force - and he didn't have a strong sense of whether he could do that or not - then he could certainly bolster her with a hand wrapped around hers, a hug of support, encouraging words. Those were things that anyone could do and it rather seemed Lyric had the same idea. Jacen met Lyric's eyes, the easy desire he'd felt earlier had faded back into the strongest affection for the man in front of him. "You have a good team," he affirmed quietly. Truthfully, considering what they were doing someone like Anakin who had gathered a bit of experience with the Yuuzhan Vong directly, might be really helpful. But Jacen knew better than to say anything about that now, and had really after their conversation on the Venture determined that it wasn't a good idea no matter how much Anakin might add. If Rikki had a bad feeling about it, he wasn't going to force an issue. Not when they had a lot of other data that would be helpful. "But I actually - it wasn't about that. At least not directly. It was more something Lyric said a moment before - it made me think of something else." Jacen didn't know exactly how to explain what he was about to try to explain. All he knew was that it felt important. Perhaps even more important considering the importance of the success of this mission. He hadn't had a lot of time to put his thoughts together so when he did speak it was quietly, trying to pick his words intentionally to explain what he was thinking. "Back when Anakin and Jaina and I flew together at Dubrillion we were able to link with each other using the Force. That was simple enough, because we're siblings as well as being Jedi, but it got me thinking - we're going to hit rough patches, and maybe I could use that link - with Jaina, but with the other Jedi, and possibly even in a rudimentary way help you and Darius and Lyric if needed - to help keep our spirits up, and all of us positive, even if things are dark. I don't know if it would work, but I think we have everything we can possibly have in terms of tools, and knowledge, and understanding of what we're up against - this would help us bolster each other and keep our heads in the best places." Lyric raised an eyebrow slightly, a barely perceptible tick as he looked back over at Jacen. But as Jacen continued the comment made sense and Lyric was beginning to wonder if he was starting to understand Jedi more than he really wanted to. Or maybe it was just this one particular Jedi that he seemed to have a bond with that he couldn't shake and didn't want to shake. They needed to get through this mission after all, he had a future promised to him now and he wanted to see it out. So his arm squeezed Rikki's shoulder gently, holding her close as she watched Jacen. She took a deep breath, letting some of the tension ease out. The idea wasn't a bad one. While it might not work all that well with the non-jedi in the group there was a benefit to having the Jedi linked as they went through. Anakin had tried enough times with the Young Allies in their more dangerous moments. It wasn't perfect but it helped, even if she wasn't fond of the invasion of the Force. It had been so long but even if the Force was something to be comforted by the sensation of something else in her mind... "It would be good to try." Rikki conceded quietly. "I just." She hesitated, looking away from both of them and staring out into the ship. Neither of them could fully understand Onslaught and she didn't really want them too. Even Anakin had taken months, slowly easing her towards being at least less hostile towards the sensation of his place in the force. "I don't do very well with that. But it'd be good for the team." Jacen was watching her too closely to not catch the hesitation or the uncertainty. He glanced briefly towards Lyric, the initial concern he had about Rikki floating back into place. At the moment there was probably no one that needed it more than Rikki might. The rest of the team might be worried, but they were fresh and determined, and they hadn't just come off of a fight with their - whatever Anakin was to Rikki these days. It was Rikki right now that Jacen was most concerned about and as their leader she would help to set the tone but he didn't know exactly how to persist in the face of that comment. "I can talk to Jaina and some of the others," Jacen said. "I'm pretty certain that I can link all of us who are Jedi through and probably maintain that bond - at least somewhat consistently through this. I can help use the positive emotions to strengthen those that are struggling at any given time." He hesitated. This was theoretical more than really tested, but his words hadn't been false. He believed he could do it. Not entirely certain what she was saying he tentatively pressed on. "It shouldn't be anything you have to do anything with - like you and Lyric and Darius, you aren't actively maintaining a link in the same way, so it would be more like - a warm word? An emotional boost of sorts if I feel it's needed." "I just don't do well with it." Rikki's voice came out too quick, pushing the pained expression back until a carefully controlled mask. Even thinking about it, no matter how much trust she put in Jacen or the rest of the Jedi on her team, it made her skin feel as if it might start to crawl off. Which wasn't a normal reaction to the Force and she knew it. And it was not as if it truly felt the same. There was a difference, one that she couldn't properly explain. But she pulled Lyric's arm off of her shoulders gently, letting go of Jacen's hand. The room felt too warm, crowded. Lyric seemed to understand, moving just slightly away to create a space. "It's complicated." she finally admitted, crossing her arms before her and pillowing her head against them on the table. "Back on my world, the reason I left. It's. There was this man. Onslaught. And he took over my mind." She was quiet for another moment before continuing. "I just don't do well with the feeling of something else being there, something else that isn't me." Jacen's hand dropped away from hers, his brow furrowing slightly at the response which was if not entirely comprehensible at least obvious to him. And it was impossible to completely cover the frustration and then disappointment that flashed through on the heels of the motion. Rikki, at least, wasn't watching him so likely only Lyric would have noticed. If he even had. But Jacen had thought there was something here that might help make everyone a little stronger but it was obvious from her response that the one person he'd hoped most to shore up with it - even without an ability to touch the Force - was fearful of the entire notion. And he didn't know what to say to someone in Rikki's situation. He hardly understood the situation in the first place but mind entered without permission he supposed that he could understand that. It was a place to start. Maybe the only place to start because if you had no defences and you couldn't fight back against someone... "Rikki I - I didn't know. It doesn't have to - I mean, it's -" he looked over at Lyric as if something there might help him find something to say. "I don't have to do this. For you or at all if it's uncomfortable. I- don't even know that it will work." He settled into silence that wasn't altogether comfortable, but at least it was more comfortable than the time he'd kissed her and found out the hard way about her dead fiancé. It was honestly a wonder they were still friends as frequently as he seemed to find the kriffing worst thing to bring up. "How could you know?" Rikki asked quietly, her chest compressing with the soft rush of air out as she sighed. "I never told you." There was so much she hadn't told them, so many secrets that she kept inside that they felt like they would break loose at any moment. Keeping secrets was never something she was entirely good at, never this many and never this long. Sure there were some. Who she was, where she was living, maybe she was better at keeping them than she thought. But it had been almost two years of secrets, they were all piling up and all she wanted was someone she could turn to. While there had been Luke and Mara that felt different from this. She was startled out of her thoughts by the warm press of lyrics hand against her back. Eyes up she managed a faint smile that was returned. This mission wasn't about her though, no matter how much of her soul she had poured into it. Pulling herself up, her arms wrapped around Jacen's, pulling his arm against her as she leaned into him. "There's a lot I can't talk about yet and that's one of them." She explained softly. "But it's a good idea for the Jedi. We need to have as much belief as we can. There's a lot riding on us, but to protect the Galaxy we need to a step up because no one else can." Lyric ran small circles against her back gently as he looked up to Jacen before back at Rikki. "Sounds pretty inspirational there, nomad." It was answered with a weak attempt at a laugh. "Yeah, well, I believe it. And I wouldn't have any other team with me for this." For the Jedi. Well, he could talk to Jaina and Tenel Ka and the others and they could pull something like what he'd described together and he was certain it wouldn't even be difficult. But it left Jacen without any real option to help Rikki. She pulled his arm back against her and he did the only thing he could think of to do, which was to slide his arms around her for a warm hug. "We've got this, Rikki," he said softly. "All of us are here to make this happen and that's what we're going to do." He was still worried about her, and didn't know if what he and the others could offer in support would be enough to boost her spirits. He didn't know if it was a good idea to say something about Anakin or a bad idea. All he really knew is that he'd give this everything he had, and he had no intention of having to take over control from her or from Darius. They were going to make it through this. They were going to make the galaxy a little bit better in the process. Jacen could keep faith in that. His lips twitched slightly as he pulled back. "And you know, if Lyric starts giving you attitude you can just come to me, and I'll put him in line," he offered his tone light and teasing, hoping to draw a grin from her as well. Rikki let go of his arm to let her arms wrap around Jacen, a soft sigh as she knew she needed to pull herself together. A moment of weakness, a moment of weariness, and now members of her team were worried. She couldn't afford to have this weakness, not now when they were so close. Whatever the future held it would be better. The voxyn would never bee released and Anakin would be able to help see the galaxy into a new age, one where Jacen would hopefully never have to face the darkness like he had after Anakin's death. "Hey, who says you can put me in line?" Lyric's reply was barely a chuckle, but there was an easy smile as he reach up to ruffle Jacen's hair affectionately. Maybe they could pull Rikki would of this dire patch and he hoped they could. The entire team was looking to her and Lyric would do what he could to prop her up. The answer was a soft escape of a laugh as Rikki looked between them, a smile almost breaking out. "You know, I wasn't expecting you two to get along this well." Which was a statement that had more implications that she was still processing her way through. If this meant Allana was never born? Then again Allana was a long ways off. "It's good." Jacen kept his arms around her for a moment, wrapping her up in all the warmth and security he could provide without the Force. It wasn't going to last, of course, but he'd give what he could, and he would see this mission through. He couldn't be certain but it felt as if some of the weight had lifted off of her shoulders just a bit. Perhaps there was some hope that she'd find the belief she needed to get through this even without the Force. His eyes pulled up to Lyric's, and it was on the tip of his tongue to say 'Oh, I can put you anywhere I want', but he held back saying so aloud. Even if Rikki knew about him and Lyric being together, he wasn't certain she was quite ready to hear about them at that level. Instead his eyes were warm and bemused as he looked up to meet Lyric's eyes. "He's handsome, and we all know I'm charming," Jacen teased gently with more confidence than he'd typically infuse into such a statement, and perhaps more than he really felt after feeling as if he'd messed up the whole notion of using the Force to boost everyone. But he was glad to see the look on her face had lightened. It wasn't quite a full smile, but it was close, much closer than anything they'd had since they left the Venture. "It might well have been inevitable." Certainly there had been a spark of desire the first time they'd met, something Jacen would have never expected himself. He dropped his hand to cover one of Rikki's and he squeezed it gently. "I should go find Jaina and the others - get their feedback on this meld idea and discover if we can make it a thing." "You're charming now?" Lyric teased easily, full of affection as he caught Jacen's eyes and knew exactly what his Princess was holding back. The moment before Rikki had walked in wasn't entirely gone but they both knew this was more important. If they got out of this alive then they'd have more time to sneak around the Venture and figure out just how to cut out a small bit of space for themselves. Rikki straightened her back, a small twitch of a stronger smile at the weight of Jacen's hand on hers. They would get through this, even if she didn't. She had to be strong for the rest of the team, to pull everything together for the sake of the Jedi and the galaxy. And this team had managed to pull this mission off once in worse circumstances. "It's a good idea I think. No reason to not give ourselves more of an edge if we can." Lyric took her note and got up, letting Rikki get to her feet and look back at Jacen. "And thank you." she said softly. "Both of you." "You tell me you're never charmed," Jacen's smile was warm and affectionate as he met Lyric's eyes, but he was standing as well dropping the teasing for a more serious smile given to Rikki. His eyes held an equal warmth as he met hers and he nodded briefly. "It's part of why we're here." |