Alex loves to eat (nanwu) wrote in st_margarets, @ 2015-07-01 11:12:00 |
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Entry tags: | character: alex jiang, location: beyond the academy and camden, npc: guozi jiang |
Narrative: Passing On
WHO: Alex Jiang
WHEN: July 1, 2015
WHERE: Jiang Home in California/Spirit World
NPCs: Guozi Jiang
Going into the spirit world was always easy. Alex always struggled staying out of it. Even with his extra trainings with his grandfather, he didn't feel like he was making much progress. When they would go there, his grandfather would have to reassure the spirits that Alex wasn't dangerous. He told them all he was stupid, and Alex had gotten used to hearing it, and he also knew that what he'd done was stupid. As much as he tried to justify it, it was stupid. Today it didn't look like they would be doing a lot of conversing though. At least not with spirits. Instead they were walking around the home which looked so different here. Alex sometimes felt like he wanted into some impressionist's canvas with the colors swirling about wildly, but there certainly was a beauty to it. "What are we doing?" Alex asked again. It was at least the fifth time since entering the spirit world he asked, and each time his grandfather wouldn't answer or he would answer with some old saying. He was starting to sound like the stereotype of the old Chinese man who just keeps spouting out proverbs. "A person leaves a reputation, bad or good, behind wherever he works or stays," his grandfather responded and Alex frowned. Yeah, he saw the wisdom in the phrase, but was that what they were here for? To remind Alex that he was going to go back to St. Margaret's soon and have to face those people that he'd left a really bad mark on. It wasn't like they were completely innocent, but Alex had done quite a bit of damage. He frowned and his grandfather turned to him again. "Life is very short," his grandfather said, "but such beauty fills every moment." "Why are you talking like a fortune cookie?" Alex asked with a frown and when he looked at his grandfather closely he noticed something was different. A lot was different. His grandfather's spirit didn't look like this radiant warrior. He still looked like his grandfather but it was like something was missing. Alex was having a hard time pinpointing what that was exactly and it took him a few moments before it clicked. "You died," Alex whispered and his grandfather's spirit placed a hand upon Alex's shoulder. He said nothing but the look on his face confirmed it. "When?" Alex asked and his grandfather replied, "When we passed into this realm." "Why didn't you say something before? I didn't get to say goodbye. I couldn't even—you're d—why are you doing this? Why are you dying?" Alex was having a hard time keeping one thought long enough to fully form a sentence. He was already wanting to ask more but he couldn't figure out how to let it out. His grandfather's hand moved from his shoulder to his face. Alex looked at the creased lines of the older man who had been dying for some time. Alex knew it was going to happen some day and he knew it was getting worse, but he just hadn't expected it to happen so . . . suddenly. "We are saying goodbye here," his grandfather said, "In this world. The very last place where we can part ways. I am dying because I am a very old man and I am also very sick. You know I am sick and have been. It is what brought our paths together." "Where are you going?" Alex asked weakly. "I do not know. Perhaps reborn into another life or maybe somewhere else. I will follow the same path as my ancestors and simply be," his grandfather responded, speaking in a way that confused Alex. He hated it when his grandfather spoke that way, but Alex knew if he wanted to know what he meant, his grandfather would simply say that Alex would have to seek those answers for himself. "I don't want you to go," Alex said, "Please. You need to stay. I have to go back to St. Margaret's and I don't want to go back there. You need to be alive and go teach there. Teach them everything you know. You know more than anyone else there. More than Ms. Menides, I bet." "Your headmistress is a very wise woman. She feels anger and fury but she knows how to lead. I have to go, and you need to let me go now," his grandfather returned and Alex felt a surge of panic, "No! I need you to stay! You're the first one that cared! I—FUCK!" "Guowei," came the firm reprimand in the form of Alex's real name. Alex wanted to panic but he bit back the urge and instead just stared at the old man's spirit. "We come into this life and many of us leave it. At different times, yes. Some try to cheat death or escape it. Others become its friend and live for a very long time. But for you and me, we know our fate. I have lived my life and now it is over. My chapter is done. I will not defy what is intended for me. I know my place and I have perfected my skill. There is no better end than I could ever want for myself. Especially since I see how much you have changed from that little brat I met." Alex stared at him. He couldn't think of anything to say. "Your life on this earth is not as long as you think, Guowei. Do not squander it. I will be here still, but I cannot be with you out there." Hope sprung up like a fountain within Alex and he asked, "I can still see you here?" "I will guide you as I can, but as I am now, I cannot teach you how to live your life among the other world. I will not be here all the time though, so do not lose yourself here in search of me. I will find you when I know you need me. You are my grandson. We are connected by blood in that bond. For now I must go and you must return. You need to tell your parents of my passing. I wish to be returned to my homeland for my burial. Bury my body there, grandson, and I will be with you until the day you call this place your home." Alex said nothing else. He allowed his grandfather to guide him back to where their bodies were. Alex's own sitting in lotus position with a perfectly straight back and calm. His grandfather's body was slumped forward. They shared a hug before Alex returned to his world and found his eyes blinking tears that had somehow pooled during his trance. He turned and touched his grandfather's arm. It was cold to the touch, lacking the warmth of life. Even if Alex knew his grandfather promised to be there for him should he need him, the man had still passed and Alex hugged the frail body in his arms, letting the tears flow freely. He didn't wail or moan as he cried, but the grief was still there. He didn't get up from where he sat either, but called to his parents. His mother came eventually. Alex told her that his grandfather was dead and she seemed appalled that Alex was hugging the old man's corpse. She tried to pull him away, but Alex just held on, saying that they needed to bury him in China. His mother didn't argue with him and said it could be arranged. She left the room, leaving Alex with the husk of the man who had changed Alex's life forever. Alex wept for a bit longer until it was time to let him go. |