truly_desperate (truly_desperate) wrote in spinningcompass, @ 2015-03-18 21:46:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | !closed, katherine lokadóttir, loki |
Who: Loki and Katherine
Where: the forest
When: Friday 13th, just after midnight
What: Birthday presents
Rating: Low
Open: NO
Status: Completed
He had been timing her biology perfectly, watching the clock count down to her birthday. Really, Loki had lucked out that her birthday was soon after she had turned her head back in his direction rather than the heroes’. He had much to teach her when she was ready, but if it were the anniversary of her birth, he had a feeling in his gut that their relationship would reach a whole new level.
Loki stood in his favourite clearing in the forest, looking up at the stars. He hadn’t cared much for the feasts after their glorious victories back on Asgard and had instead decided often to seclude himself away, contemplating what his next move should be. As soon as midnight was struck, he could bring her the most wonderful gift. The gift of more power.
Katherine had been craving the power, he could taste it on the air. He just had to offer and she would jump at the chance.
He watched the stars and felt the time turn to midnight. Grasping his sceptre in his hand, Loki summoned the power to bring Katherine to him by a teleport. He didn’t have to set foot anywhere near the pathetic Avengers
---
Katherine had been staring at her computer screen for the last three hours. She still needed to get used to the ancient editing software. It was frustrating. Everything was under different function and she was never able to find the tools she needed. And the speed! Everything happened in slow motion. If she applied a complicated filter to the picture she almost had enough time to make herself a cup of tea. How were people able to work like this?
A picture of a foggy landscape had completely overtaken her mind. She had quickly taken a liking to the raw version and had been working on making a good picture perfect. Sometimes it was easy enough but often it took her hours to be completely satisfied. She was quite the perfectionist. Kat hadn't even noticed that midnight had passed when she suddenly found herself sitting crossed-legged in the middle of a forest, dressed in only her pjs and a t-shirt. Adrenaline rushed through her body and set it on fire. Her eyes darted upwards and met those of her father. She almost jumped to her feet. Her heart beat quicker than a cheetah in full sprint.
"Father," she breathed, trying to regain her composure and calm. Her eyes dropped to her bare feet, feeling very much inadequate for a meeting with a god, even if this particular god had contributed to her very own gene pool. She looked back up at him, eyes half-averted in a coy gesture. She still wasn't quite sure how to handle this, how to handle him. A part of her told her that she shouldn't even want this. But she did and her other half came up quickly enough with justifications. Abi had told her that no one was pure evil and even though Kat was sure that she would never put as much trust in her father like Maryanne did, her friend's words had encouraged a change in her mind that had already started a while ago. There was no evil. There was no good. Humans and gods were both slaves to their experiences and emotions and she could understand those of her father all too well. She trusted him as much as she trusted herself.
So far he had not hurt her and she was not so naive as to think that she would ever be safe from him. If he wanted to hurt her, he could and would. Nonetheless, it was a dangerous game. She liked her life. She liked her friends, her uncle. Her hobbies. She was terrified of endangering them, all the people she put at risk. Maryanne might not be able to see it but by interacting with Loki you put the people dear to you in danger. But her mundane human life wasn't enough. It was half of her and she craved more. Meeting her father was a drug. This was hers. It was special. It was forbidden. It was a gate to the power that had been kept away from her for so long. She felt like a bird which had finally been allowed to grow wings. Who was she to deny them?
---
Loki perused upon the tiny mortal girl in front of him, pale and with goosebumps and so very very fragile. He didn't like weakness, as to speak of such things was mortal and pointless in his realm. He took pity upon her and materialised thick robes around her; a dark green dress and cloak with fur collar and the seal of Odin holding it together. He thought she looked like she belonged.
"Hello Katherine. Happy birthday." He said quietly, the sceptre glowing and illuminating his rounder cheeks. "Are you more comfortable now? I cannot have my only child in rags."
---
Katherine looked down at her with fascination. People said that clothes make the man. Oh, it was so very true. They made her stand a little more upright, chin raised a little higher and her expression that of pride. No more tiny little mortal Kat who tried to keep up with her brothers and failed miserably in her father's eyes. No. To this father - her real father - she was something. She hadn't quite worked out the definition of something - maybe she never would - but it was better than anything Liam ever gave her.
She smiled broadly at him. It wasn't the beam people like Jay and Abi received. It belonged to another world. "Thank you, father. This is much more suitable."
---
He was pleased that she held herself higher; it was more appropriate, yes, given her reckoning. It was as if she reflected his mother, though Loki knew it was biologically impossible. If Frigga were alive, then everything would change for him - Katherine would know her roots, be guided by his mother like he had been and would never waiver in her trust. Loki’s sceptre hit the ground softly and lights were illuminating them in a soft warm glow.
“You’re welcome. They won’t disappear, so keep them clean and in good stead,” he warned, sitting on one of the rocks by the brook. “I need to speak to you, daughter, I have a gift to offer you.”
---
The young woman gave a nod of understanding. She would keep them safe. She would value them and most likely never let anyone else touch or see them. They were hers. She took a place on a rock next to him, careful not to dirty her first gift from her father. An eyebrow was raised at his statement and she cocked her head to the side. Her heart leaped in anticipation. "Yes?" she encouraged him to go on, her eyes shining brightly in the light of the waning moon.
---
Loki peered up at the stars for a moment, remembering his 18th cycle. In mortal terms, he was over 1500 years old but on Asgard, he was regarded as a petulant child, a mere teenager as the humans would say. His own birthdays were not so much celebrated as tolerated. “It is your 23rd birthday, is it not?” he asked rhetorically, pulling the central orb from his sceptre without touching it. The blue glow was ethereal. “In the centre of this,” he floated the orb in mid-air, “Is an infinity stone. Specifically, the mind stone. They were forged many many years before existence from fragments of universes. They have infinite power and cannot be touched by anyone, especially a mortal. But what it can give you today is an opportunity.”
---
Kat gave a small nod at his question. She knew what the sceptre was, still she couldn't help but listen to her father's words with fascination and awe. Reading up on things bend over a computer screen that were mostly written by some fans and hearing it from Loki himself were as different as summer and winter; the landscape was the same but the way you perceived it was oh so different. Those people and their ideas, their speculations - they would never have this. Never sit here with the man that was powerful and clever enough to destroy worlds and fool the wittiest of the witty. They would never ever share his blood.
She gave a nod and urged him to go on. She was eager to know what he had to offer.
---
“As it is your birthday today, I can offer you a once-only gift.” The orb glowed eerily and hummed as it floated closer to Kat. “It’ll require a sacrifice, but if you give it willingly, the infinity stone can enable your Jotun side to manifest easier.” His own eyes appeared ice blue by the light of the stone. “You will be able to unlock your full, unravaged, immortal potential, Katherine. Isn’t that what you wanted?”
---
Her eyes shone at him. Yes, that was exactly what she wanted. She gave a hesitant nod and bit her lower lip. "What sacrifice?" she asked, her body tensing under the uncertainty.
---
Loki smirked a little, chuckling at her fear. “A drop of your blood, my daughter.” He muttered, the orb hovering still in front of her head. “It demands your loyalty and sacrifice for that gift.”
---
Katherine's eyes widened. That was all? She had been prepared for test. Find out how far she was willing to go and where her loyalty lay. A smile tugged at her lips. This "monster" treated her so much better than the supposed hero. "Well then," she said, her confidence growing as the smile turned into a smirk of her own. She held her hand up and displayed the inside of her palm. "How do we do this?"
---
“Just watch.” Loki turned his empty sceptre upside down, the curve of the blade sharp and shiny, threatening enough. He took her wrist firmly and sliced along her palm, knowing she had to feel it, and that he had to draw blood. “Just a drop, Katherine..” he muttered, holding the sceptre. He held the point of the blade above the orb and dripped three drops of her blood onto the orb.
It sparked and shattered into life, turning the darkest of blues, as cold as ice. Tendrils whipped out from it, and curled around her arms, her legs and neck up to her temple. “Open your mind, daughter. Let it take you. Don’t force it out.”
---
Don't force it out. That was like telling a pilot to fly into the ground. She had enough self-control to not jump away. Her instincts screamed at her but a small jerk and eyes that were ripped open were the only things that betrayed her struggle. Weakness was prohibited. Not right now. Not in front of her father.
This was old sly Bernard all over again. The mean bastard she had loved to bits and who had been condemned by the islanders as much as she had been. Only that he had earned himself the right while she had inherited it. Fucking legilimens.
It took her a second to convince her own guards to take a break. And when she did icey fingers touched her mind. But they did not searched. It was a far more sinister violation. She was a cast where ice was poured into. It reached every cell. Every thought and every fibre of her being.
---
Loki watched, enraptured as Katherine was consumed by the ice blue light. He could taste her power increasing before his eyes, feeling her whole body richened by his Jotun ice. “Katherine. Do not fight. Let it in.” he encouraged softly. His sceptre absorbed the remnants of Kat’s blood. He had some plans for that later, but for now, his only child was blossoming into the powerful being she could be.
“You’ll know when you are ready.” he said confidently. “It will know when you have reached your capacity.”
---
Slowly, steadily she felt it manifest. A parasite that slowly turned into a symbiosis. The young Jötunn forced her defenses down, trying to absorb as much of the cold as possible. It hurt. It etched into her humanity, carving its marks and shaping it - molding it to a stronger structure. She gasped as suddenly the last bit of the foreign matter left. Everything was hers. She dropped to the ground, panting heavily. The process had rid her of her energy.
---
The orb had finished its job and had returned to its icy cold place in his sceptre. Loki shuddered himself as it did so, feeling it through the metal of the staff. He had never seen anything so damn beautiful and elegant in all his life as his daughter becoming a Jotun warrior woman, the person she was meant to be. His sceptre dissolved and Loki bent at the knee, placing a palm on her cheek. “Wake up, Katherine. Can you feel the earth turning? Can you see every centre of every realm?” he muttered. “Can you taste the power you have now?”
---
Kat shook her head, trying to regain a grip on reality. Blue eyes met their equivalent as she tried to make sense of what had happened. Her mind felt slow, still overwhelmed by the shock of change. Still disorientates, she glanced down at her hand. The cut had already started to fade.
Instead of answering, she tried to get up. She had barely understood the questions. She had heard her father's voice but the words hadn't reached her mind. Feet tried to find a grip in the ground as muscles tried to adjust to their newly acquired density and strength. She felt like a baby trying out its first steps. Her balance was off. Her head spinning slightly as she finally stood on her two feet. Her body shook slightly as she smiled a wavering smile at her father, not wanting to disappoint him.
Kat's eyes darted from side to side as she noticed the changes around her. The midnight breeze was less biting. The air less fresh. She tested for differences in her body. Let her mind wander down her alone and limbs. Pain still echoed through her body. It might have absorbed the ice but her bones and tissues weren't finished yet. Suddenly she lost her balance. Keeping herself upright was too heavy on her mind and stumbled forwards into the other frost giant. "Sorry", she muttered, trying to regain clarity in her thoughts.
---
Loki caught the stumbling child in his arms. When his skin touched hers, it didn't turn blue, it didn't frost or ice or burn. He was amazed at how much pain she had taken on in the name of pure power, in the search for identity and meaning. In that second in his arms, she truly felt like his daughter for the first time. Katherine was more than she could ever hope to be and would soon discover how the universe truly felt. He didn't want her to sit around and ignore what was turning and changing.
"Slow." He commanded in a tender but rough voice. "You need to let it work first." Loki sat her back down on the rock and touched the sceptre to the seal on her robes. It shimmered and shone, turning from a dull gold into bright and alive. "This seal is the seal of Odin, of the throne to Asgard. I should have been King, but you are my daughter. You should be a Queen of this realm." He looked into her eyes. "You are not their toy, Katherine. Think for yourself, whether that be good or bad of me."
---
Kat clung to the stone as she took in her
father's words. They surprised her and she glanced at him with a mix of shock and curiosity. Until now her opinions had been masticated for her by her adopted parents. It was all 'you need to believe this and that'. No one had ever told her to make up her own mind too scared of the decisions she would make. Humans were so busy fighting for affection that the truth got lost in the struggle. If everyone would just be themselves things would be so much easier.
Not their toy. No one's toy. That was what she wanted. She had no ambition to be a queen - what was their to rule anyway? For her power meant independence. She wanted to be able to say 'fuck you' to anyone and anything.
She flinched as pain shot through her body once again. She let it ebb away before glancing back at her father. "Thank you." She huffed shortly. "You know you are already doing a far better job than Liam." While the first two words held real gratitude, the last were filled with the contempt she held for the man that raised her.
---
Loki ran a thumb along her cheekbone as he sat her down, seeing the gauges of his own genes in her face. He could accept that she was his daughter now, he had evidence of it in front of his eyes with the Jotun... but to believe that she was half human? A mortal had stolen his heart and had born him a daughter of such magnificent beauty and power? It was impossible. He had never heard of a half mortal ever taking on a mind stone's influence. But she had. He had to know if her mother had truly been a mortal woman, or if there was something more in the background that he wasn't aware of.
"I'm just giving you your birthright back, dear daughter. How you use it is up to you. Are you feeling more stable yet? I cannot transport you back until your DNA has settled into its new code."
---
Kat's eyes raised to meet his, eyes staring up at him at the affectionate gesture. Emotions formed a knot in her throat and pulled it tight. If you had asked her two months ago, she wouldn't have allowed herself to predict that she would experience any other feeling besides contempt towards this man. But here she sat and experienced something that she had not felt in a while: a sense of belonging. For a long time the thought of Loki being half of her had filled her with nothing but disgust. Now it had changed to an odd pride. He was clever. He was strong. He chose the people he cared about very carefully. She knew she shouldn't but she started to trust him slowly. One tiny step at a time. She did not agree with the things he had done but she understood. If he would endanger her friends, she would be the first to try and stop him but she hoped that whatever had brought on that display of affection would be enough to keep him from trying.
"I'm getting there," she mumbled. She felt more stable but was still far from okay. Her body was still a work in progress and exhaustion spread through her body. Ten minutes. Maybe twenty. She couldn't wait to fall into her own bed.
---
Loki had never been one for sentiment, and if he had felt connections, they did not last long. Maryanne had betrayed his confidences, his own brother and friends had fought against him, his father despised him all his life. Any meaningful connection in his life had been nothing but fraught with eventual anger and hatred. If there was one thing he missed more than anything it was not having regrets. Frigga had died because of his actions, the only woman and the only person to never have betrayed him. He hoped that Katherine never would, particularly now that he was treating her the right way, but he couldn’t be certain of it. If she was half mortal, then that was her weakness. He couldn’t change her base materials but he could make her Jotun half stronger.
“Let it take its time, Katherine,” he said, tucking her thick dark hair behind her ear comfortingly. “Come here…” he pressed his thumb to her skin and closed his eyes. He sent her images of his home, of Frigga, of Asgard and his home. Gold and glittering in its splendor. “This is where you were meant to be, daughter.”
--
The young woman leaned into her father's touch. She let the pictures wash over her and the beauty nearly over powered her. The Island was a waste dump compared to the place that had formed in her head. Frigga - she was all every woman could ever dream of being. Full of love and affection, beauty and strength. People like her did not belong here. She could see that now. Her father, her uncle - you did need any more bars. This was already a prison to them. How could they ever be happy here when they had experienced true beauty and elegance? A tear formed in her eye, created from the grief she held for both of Frigga's sons and herself and strengthened by the exhaustion that had claimed her. "This place must be hell for you."
---
He had not expected her to understand so easily. Perhaps it was her power that opened up her mind like this but he wondered if it wasn't simply who she was. Empathetic. The world he had come from was the centre of Yddrassil, the key stone to order in the nine realms. There were greater powers in the universe and even darker forces, but Asgard was the one they all coveted. The good and the bad were one in their goal for its throne.
"It is different. Our powers a Jotuns allows us to see beyond this world, into the next. If you held the sceptre in Asgard, you could see the infinitesimal connections between worlds and people as clear as your own palms, but here? I see nothing but dead air and desperation for meaning. The people here have no concept of how truly trapped they are. And I am stuck with them." One day, he would let her take the sceptre in her hand so she could understand that the sky above them with its stars was a lie. "I'm sorry, but that is the truth of this place. I don't want to rule it, Katherine, I want to destroy it. And go back to my rightful place."
---
For one who had always been bored in history lessons, she listened carefully. This was more than a story about power-driven people she would most likely never meet and most certainly did not care about. This though was heritage. It was her story as much as this island.
She gave a small tip of the head, showing her understanding. Understanding did not mean that you had to agree though. She was silent for a moment letting her weakened mind process his thoughts. "We - we know that. I don't think you realise how many of us know that. It's hard to grow up here. You hear of all these wondrous place, you see them but they are never truly yours. All these people who crave their homes and all you ever know is this place. To survive you have to find its beauty." It was part of the reason why she became a photographer. The art changed your view of this tiny little that would only ever be a prison or a refuge to most.
---
He knew she couldn't possibly fathom it, yet. Perhaps if she had grown up in his lap with her full powers, then she would know what the island truly was. The outside world, the one she and the others perceived was a veil intended to shade and distract from the ugly face beneath it. He did not want to rid her of her optimism, though; she was young and impetuous and liable to create more trouble with the sceptre whilst her powers were settling. He would not ruin her, not for the throne or any other worldly thing.
"I understand you cannot see it and I won't show it to you either, Katherine. You must come to your conclusion as I have come to mine. Believe me when I say that I wish I could show you the nine realms but I can't. Even if one of those ludicrous doors showed up, it would never be the real thing. These are fallacies fed to you to keep you in line...." he began but sighed and shook his head. "Still, I cannot make you see it. It has to be your choice. A pretty lie is still a lie to me."
--
Her eyes widened and she quickly averted them to the side, her mind integrating his words into the knowledge of her time. Reality was all what it came down to. And that's what most lacked. The buildings, the animals, the people - it was all a fake. The theory was that people born here - made from this place were real. But maybe everything was a fake. The whole world. Nothing existed and nothing held meaning.
"Are we all lies, father?" she asked, turning back to him. Her tiredness forbid her to feel fear. The realisation would hit tomorrow and be ugly one. Right now, it was just a story.
---
He didn’t want to scare her so. Loki couldn’t bare to break the girl of her own, newfound self. She would become a powerfully astute woman, worthy of any true place in the universe. It sickened him that she was here, amongst the dead and the dying minds of the mortals and the mutants. Reality had infected him, and now he had infected her.
“The people here… they are not lies, Katherine. I will tell you as much; your friend Abi, she is real. Her son, too; them and their bond is real and yet they live in this bubble happily. It is down to you to decide whether that happiness is real or constructed by whatever is holding them here.” Loki still held Katherine in his arm, looking into her eyes. “My darling daughter is the most precious thing in this place and she will be more powerful than any of them had ever dreamed. Are you happier in this time with me than you were in the future with your other parents?”
---
His words fulfilled their purpose. They soothed her as did his touch. She let herself sink into it, lull her mind with the comfort of the embrace. "That man is not my father," she almost spit out. She left Holly's involvement out of it. She could see clearer now that wound had started to heal. They had told her that having a life away from Loki, not being under his influence was something she should be grateful for. They had deeply misjudged him. For the first time an elder did not want to shape her mind. Holly had supported her. She done her best in her limited human way, restrained by the limits of her own thoughts, beliefs and upbringing.
---
He was pleased by the ferocity of her reply, but didn’t show it. Instead, Loki ran his ice cold fingers down her clothed arm, the seal on her robes glinting blue and silver. She was truly his daughter, with his temperament to match. “No, he is not. I’m your father and I see that now,” he pressed a fatherly kiss to the crown of her head. “I will protect you if you need me too, my daughter. I can’t promise that people won’t be scared of your new powers if they saw them in action. They are terrified that you’ll be like me; powerful and with universally known knowledge. But you are my priority now, don’t fret.”
---
Katherine pushed a little deeper into his arms. While she might have been special to some, she had never been a priority to anyone. Even with the few relationships she had had, she had never felt that she had been number one. The sex might have been but not her true self. But this was not tainted by lust and desire. It was pure, possibly the only pure thing she would ever get and she would value it.
"If they decide to treat me with contempt, I will return the privilege," she said with a dangerously calm voice.
---
She was a true goddess, Loki thought as he bundled her into his arms and lifted her. It was protective as his stance but if he was going to have a daughter, he'd rather be the most appreciative of fathers and make up for the failings with his own mother's death. He mourned her intensely and held Kat as if she were a newborn.
"It's alright, little one, I will walk you home. I'm sure your uncle will treat you better than the mortals do, at least. He is a fool, but he sees this realm as a new beginning. And that is invaluable when it comes to you and I."
---
"Thank you." The sound was almost lost to the words but they filled with the purest gratitude. "Thor is nice to me. I'm special in his eyes, even though we share no blood. I can only appreciate it."
She did not want to mend any bonds. It was not her decision to make as much as she was the only one who was allowed to judge her relationship with her adoptive family. But she wanted to let him know that she valued his presence to disencourage any open fights and try to build this one pure relationship on something other than lies. They had both been lied to enough in their lives.
---
“He is family, Katherine, that means the world to him. I see family as those who earn the right to call themselves such. You have earnt that tonight, daughter.” He carried her easily back through the forest. He could not come up with her but he could make her teleport as easy and painless as possible, through the short distance it would carry her.
Loki had refrained from giving her the second gift; it had been something he was rather reluctant to give away but she had earnt it now. “I have another present for your birthday, Katherine. If you’d look after it for me, I would be in your debt.”
---
Kat held onto the man that carried her tightly. She felt like a child again and she was too exhausted to care for the sense of vulnerability it left her with. Or maybe it was the growing trust that kept her from trying to regain her independence with all her strength and stubbornness.
His words honoured her. "You've already given me more than I thought I would ever gain." While she kept her words humble, she let her tone reveal her curiosity.
---
He chuckled softly as he carried her, letting her hold onto him tighter. It reminded him of saving children with his brother and the warriors on those poor stricken planes, the orphaned children and fatherless ones clinging to him for safety. Katherine wasn't such a child but he still had to protect her.
"It's not a powerful gift, darling girl, but it has significance for your dynasty. It belonged to your grandmother and she gave it to me to pass on."
---
Something belonging to her grandmother? Her left hand immediately went to her neck, trying to grasp the pendant only to find it missing. It was an empty feeling. "What is it?" Her voice grew stronger. Curiosity chasing away the tiredness.
---
“Let me get you home, Katherine, or as close as I am permitted to,” he grumbled at the last part of that sentence but set her down softly as they got to her home. “How are you feeling?” he asked, setting her down on her feet and keeping a steadier hold on her.
---
She held onto his arm while she tested her strength and stability. It was slowly returning. She let go of his arm, watching her own toes dig into the earth below. She stood. No shakiness, no weakness. No nothing. The pain still throbbed through her body but it could kiss her ass. "I'm good," she stated, eyes filled with a mix of pride and astonishment at Loki.
---
Loki chuckled softly at the sight of her. He could feel the remnants of her pain on the periphery of his mind but saw she was overcoming them. He felt a swell of pride and kissed her forehead. "That's my girl. Now, for your present..." he moved her arms so they were laid out flat, palms up. He manifested his sceptre and whispered something into the orb.
Folded robes, golden and pristine, appeared across her arms. They were opulent, being embroidered with silken flowers and Norse emblems.
"These were my mother's robes when she was commenced," he said, "They match the amulet I gave you. They don't have any power but you are worthy of wearing them now, Katherine."
---
Kat openly gaped at the gift. The were beautiful - flawless like the woman they had belonged to. "I'm not worthy of them, father. She's love and kindness and strength. I'm just a child," she said. And she harboured a destruction inside that should not be mixed with something as great as Frigga. "I'm far from pure."
---
Loki was pleased with her reaction. It was appropriate to what he had given her, the most precious of his gifts. The amulet had power and sentiment but it was these robes that he remembered from his childhood. "You will be worthy, Katherine. Keep them as something to aim towards wearing, darling daughter."
---
Katherine gave a sharp nod as her eyes fell back onto the garment in front of her. "I will use them as my guide. Thank you, father." She clasped the robes gently. Emotions rushed through her as she cradled them. What she would not give to have a woman like her in her life. But Frigga did not belong here in a world as ugly as this.
---
He looked at her one last time with that glow in her eyes and knew he was ready to open up his darkened soul to her, bare it and let her judge accordingly. "Keep your smile on your heart, dear Katherine, and have a happy birthday..." he cupped her cheek in his hand and used the sceptre to teleport her back to her room.