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Tweak says, "herp derp"

Hawke was born the (victimofaname) wrote in somerealityrpg,
@ 2019-07-05 13:49:00

WHO: Hawke and Anders
WHERE: The shared apartment
WHEN: Friday, July 5th
WARNINGS: TBD (some mentions of canon typical violence and language)
SPOILERS? TBD (mentions of Dragon Age: Inquisition and Dragon Age 2)
STATUS? Ongoing

Hawke did not like putting her faith into anything. She barely believed in the Maker (Andraste could be debated, but ever since She'd gone up in flames She hadn't exactly been doing much in Hawke's opinion) and would never put her life and destiny in the hands of something that had proven itself to be petty at best and terribly cruel at it's worst. So putting her life in this benevolent entity's hands was not something she was enjoying. Besides, if it was truly that benevolent, would she need coin? Couldn't it just put them in this place. What did it need the coin for, anyway? There weren't any answers to these questions, and Hawke had no other options then to play along. She made plans, no doubt about that, because she wasn't going to be caught off guard (Kirkwall had taught her something at least) but in the mean time she needed to eat, and to keep this roof over her head (and it wasn't awful, at least it wasn't Gamlen again).

Which meant going through the paper she'd found. It was a little disheartening. Nothing sounded familiar. It wasn't a Chanter's board where she could pick up something and earn coin from it. These things asked for skills she didn't have, and some she didn't even know. All her life she'd made her coin with her daggers. Kill this thing, find this person, stop the blood mages. That was easy. But those skills didn't transfer here. She had a few options, dog walker of all things and maybe something that taught others how to defend themselves, but she was also going to reach out to the wider community and see if someone would know more. Maybe her cousin would know something.

She tensed when the door started to open. She knew some of who she was sharing with (and wasn't it hilarious she could call the bloody King of Fereldan someone she shared quarters with) but she didn't know the last person and a lifetime of being wary wasn't an easy thing to put down (even when she'd gotten her mother's mansion back she'd always been tense. It had been foreshadowing of the worst kind, because the worst thing had slipped in under her nose). She'd shed her armor, but still wore it's leather (another thing she'd need; clothes. She hoped her cousin might oblige her. Again) and never kept her daggers far away. She set one hand on one of the hilts, casually (or as casually as anyone could hold a dagger), and waited. The familiar face made her raise her eyebrows, and remove her hand.

"Hey." She relaxed and smiled at Anders. He was avoiding her, and she'd let him have it for a moment. He'd never be able to really get rid of her, and she'd almost wondered if she'd have to hunt him down. And they did need to talk. He'd acted like they had just parted ways in Kirkwall, still expecting her anger and acting like if someone had tried kidnapping him or putting him in any sort of Circle she'd just let it happen (and...well even at her angriest she'd never have let that happen. She'd ensured his safety). As if years hadn't passed where she'd only gotten word from Varric (who was still angry and who did still tell her that 'the less you know the better') and all she had was worry that he'd finally let Justice win and gotten himself killed in some fool plan. "Can't keep avoiding me you know," she added with a smile. "Might as well have a seat." She motioned to the seats. "This is an odd question, but what year is it? Back home anyway. Just, indulge me here. I swear there's a purpose to it. We can get in on everything after."

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healthespirit
2019-07-15 11:47 pm UTC (link)

Guilt radiated again through his body at those words, and like he was good at, Anders did his best to shove those feelings down again. She might have been joking and he might have smiled at it, but it didn't change how many mistakes he had made. Would he have actually written to her once he had settled somewhere like he had in Kirkwall? He couldn't imagine not having any kind of contact with her after everything they had gone through, but the situation was different now than what it probably could have been if he hadn't been brought here.

"I-" A pause, real thought being put into the mage's answer. Being physically in the fade hadn't seemed possible by regular mages in the first place. "Before what you said, I did not know if possible to be in the fade physically. If one stayed there, they would die. If there was escape, it might bring the Blight again, but different. I am not even sure how the original Tevinter mages got there." He had been afraid to research too much while in the circles and while he was out, there had only been brief moments in time where he had the actual time. Kirkwall had been different, after he met Hawke, but it didn't take long for that to shatter as well. There had been peace for him since he'd been a child. With everyone together, before he lost control over Justice and he was made into something dark. As an adult, it had been one of the happiest times he'd had as an adult, if the only.

He knew the spirit didn't agree with them being an idiot if they were doing what was right and just, but Anders didn't say anything and Jusitce didn't make another physical appearance. It was almost as if he were sulking. They were pretty much entwined with one another but they still had separate thoughts. Sometimes, at least. They tended to agree on a lot, yes, but they still had times of being their own. Like being near Hawke and feeling sentimental. Not hearing his voice was impossible, especially with him making so much sense to the mage, but sometimes he wished it was lesser. Not so much there. Would he have not made his offer if he had known what would happen between him and his friend? Maybe. The what if's were something Anders thought about often, even when he tired not to.

His thoughts were broken as she spoke, a soft smile on his lips for the moment. He was a bit of an escape artist, even if he still got caught time and time again. Even with that, he still managed to get away again. How many escapes had he managed from the circle? Seven? That seemed about right. "I can't promise not to hide, but I can try to help find a way out." It wasn't that Justice didn't think they needed other people, but most people tended to get in the way of their goals, at one point or another. Being distracted by friendships that weren't allied one hundred to what they were trying to do wasn't worth it, to the spirit. Romance, friendship. It got in the way of making the mages free in whatever way possible. When Hawke pulled back again, he frowned at her comments but didn't say anything much towards it. "It's like it is and isn't. We can still use magic, Justice is still here, but I can't feel it's presence." It was odd, something he didn't really like or understand. There was no lyrium. Not for the mages and not for the templars. What happened to them without it? He didn't worry for their health, just a curiosity. He didn't care, not really. "We'll figure it out."

Did he sound a little more sure of himself than he felt? Maybe.

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victimofaname
2019-07-16 12:21 am UTC (link)

She let him go and went to sit down again. She'd gone through everything she'd wanted to say, everything she'd promised she'd tell him next time she saw him and felt better for it. Things were more cleared up now. She would do what she could to ensure Justice didn't have the last word. She didn't care if she was a distraction because here, there weren't really mages in trouble. Yes they were all trapped, and she had an idea that if anything she could count on Justice to help them out there, but she wondered if he knew he'd have really nothing to sink his time into. She wondered if Justice would let Anders figure that out, or if she'd need to drag him out for sunshine and actual company.

"Tell you this, I'll let you have your moments of solitude. I can't actually blame you for wanting peace because I give you exactly two weeks to figure out how much fun I actually am in close quarters. I'm so much worse at mothering people when they're actually present. But if you keep it too long, I will break in. And we'll find out how mages sleep now don't we?" She gave a wicked grin and a wink, because she couldn't quite help it. She wasn't nearly as bad as Isabela, but she would flirt. She respected the answer he'd given her all those years back, but it seemed harmless enough. And it wasn't the worst line she could have used. "So unless you're keen to waking up with me staring, come out your room. It's a lot less painful. Besides the King of Fereldan is our bunkmate, who else will help me give him shit? It won't be my cousin, I know that. This is literally the one place where I can sass royalty and it not bite me in the ass." And she trusted Anders to tell her when she got too much. "Besides that there's also a chance to get some good done. We can hammer out something for the mages. He can't go against the Chantry, not directly, but there are things we can get out of him. I think he has a horse in that race anyway, what with my cousin."

"Generally, yes. Let it not be said I like any of this." Then she frowned, recalling what he'd said before about the Fade. "How long could someone last you think? And I don't think you're right with the bringing back the Blight thing. I would have it otherwise, and I was cleared by the Wardens and I'm not getting sick." She shrugged, "we left someone behind there. One of Beth's Warden friends. The choice was them or me, and while I'm not exactly sure the right choice was made, I feel at least somewhat responsible. I can't do much here, but I'd want to find a way to get them out, if they're still alive. Chances are low but even if they died I'd want to bring them home." She stared off into space because she still felt like it should have been her. "I'd want to come home I think, if It'd been me. I mean, something to be said about going down like that but being there forever? S'not right. And seeing it was my fault well I have to try." Idly she set her fingers over the tattoo on her neck, where the image of her namesake was. She hadn't thought about it much, what it would have been like for Beth to get the letter that Hawke would not be coming home and while technically the Warden hadn't had any family, she knew well enough sometimes you made your own. And every day she regretted not being able to send off Carver properly. She wanted to do this part right. And the Nightmare demon would be somewhat weakened. She hoped if there was a way, it would be a quick thing. But she doubted it. Her luck never quite ran that well.

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healthespirit
2019-07-18 03:43 am UTC (link)

A calmness he hadn't felt in a very long time was starting to touch his mind and he took a breath, unburdened with too much stress. From what he'd read on this computer thing, breathing exercises could actually help with almost anything. Once he got a little more accustomed to the world here, enough that he didn't want to just hide in his overly nice bed, he should make it his mission to figure out a way to go home. Anders and Justice still had people they needed to help, even with everything else. They could see about the ending of the Inquisition, even with Hawke saying it was over. Could he find a home back in Thedas? Was it even safe for him to return?

Then again, Hawke was one to get under his skin, in a good way or bad. Right now, he could feel his face heating a little bit at her words, a kind of laugh coming out of him at that. She was bad enough at trying to take care of them all when they weren't in the same area. How could she get worse? Would he really wake up with her hovering over him like some kind of nightmare? That part of him that was still wicked, even after all that had happened, rose up and made his lips twitch, made him want to test that theory. "That's not the worst thing to wake up to, really." A little shrug, telling her he was trying to be a little playful, in the very least. There wasn't anything he could do about their current situation right now and he could do a lot worse than being stuck with one of the only people he'd made a real friendship with. People used mages for all kinds of things but she hadn't actually done any of that. She had offered him a hand and, eventually, he'd taken it. What would have happened if they hadn't struck that first deal? Would he still be in Kirkwall, slaving away in the shadows? Maybe. Most likely not. Anyone else would have killed him afterwards, let Anders achieve the status of martyr like he'd wanted. "He can whisper ideas and not get credit." Would Alistair actually sit down with him, after everything? Sit down with Justice? Maybe if Solona asked him to. He'd promised to try, promised to give the King a chance now that he was moved on from being a Templar. Maybe this would work.

"The longer a person survives there, I can only imagine what that would do. Especially to someone tied to darkspawn." He paused, watching as she seemed to be seeing something else, or just spacing out in the moment. As she continued, he understood the guilt. "Do you think it should have been you, in his place?" He was moving to sit back down as well, feeling a touch awkward. Once sat, he ran a hand through his hair, distantly noting that it was a little longer than it should be. "I don't know what happens when someone dies in the fade. They might have to open a tear again to get him out." If they fell through a tear, they might have to do that again to get him out. Or the demons would have to push him out? Justice wasn't being any kind of help with this, either, stubborn spirit he was. "If it means anything, I'm glad you made it back."

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victimofaname
2019-07-18 04:44 am UTC (link)

She grinned when he returned the casual flirt. It showed, really, how much he was listening to Justice. There were times he'd shove people away. Whenever he showed more of himself was when she knew he was at least allowing himself friendship. She could say more, could give another comment but instead she just grinned at him. She was good with locks, and these seemed to be easy enough to figure out. She'd try her own door first, to get a handle on things. "But in that spirit, my door is open at any time. I might be keen on murder if it's the dead of the night, but if you need me I'll push it aside valiantly." Whatever sense of propriety she might have once had, the army had shed it pretty quick. She'd been a volunteer for a half hearted attempt at aid, privacy hadn't been something that had been easy to find. And she'd shared a tiny room with Beth and her mother, that first year in Kirkwall. "Granted I know you'll probably not want to be a bother or think you don't need it but if I don't make the offer I'll feel bad." She'd need to make the offer to the other two as well. She didn't know the last person they were sharing quarters with, but she figured it would change in time. And her door would be open to all, and she wouldn't play favorites.

She straightened then and nodded. She tended to joke around a lot, make herself look more foolish, or let her temper get the best of her. And with many she'd always pretended she hadn't understood them, like she was no better then the insults they gave her. It was all carefully crafted so people wouldn't look at her mage companions, as the more they looked at her the less they'd see them. She was smarter then she gave away, and her sense of politics had been crafted by the nightmare that had been Krikwall and Varric's tutoring. If she'd ever picked up the crown of Viscount, she'd have been formidable with it but she'd known that if she had, Meredith would have killed her and dragged her mages off to that prison. "If we can convince my cousin to return to court with him, it'll make things better. She's already a prime example of what a mage can be. She has titles, and with that we could get restrictions lessened." She held up her hands, "it'll be slow, and I think the first step could be letting mages who do have families be able to go home. The biggest obstacle to it is the Templars, but according to the Inquisition the Nevarran Accord was broken. If we can convince our gracious majesty to use that we can send them packing." She clasped her hands, "I don't think you'll like this but I think we'll always need Circles. Not the prisons, obviously, but even Beth needed to be taught not to create lightning every time she sneezed. I'd not want any mage to be afraid of what they can do, but to understand it. And to be taught how to be careful around demons. If we do it right, they'll be schools. I mean, Rivain seems to manage quite well."

She frowned at his comment. "Well, shit." And then that question and she looked away. "Corypheus was my fault. I should have considered that anything that needed that many layers of locks around it couldn't have just died. I let that monster out, and he broke the world. The Warden, they have knowledge, and were one of the only ones who hadn't gone batshit. That sort of leadership is hard to find." She was carefully not looking at Anders. He'd see too much otherwise. "I don't think the right call was made, no. I'm just me, and I'm not saying that to discount what I've done. I know I changed things but comparatively? It doesn't add up." Then she smiled and looked back at him, pushing everything away. "I'm glad I'm back too. Would have made a good story though."

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