Elena Gilbert (niceness) wrote in somerealityrpg, @ 2020-01-07 13:01:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | active: damon salvatore, active: elena gilbert |
displaced in time
What: Reuniting, angst, and trying to forget
When: Backdated to Saturday January 4th
Where: Their apartment
Warnings: Language, some TVD spoilers, and mush
Status: Completed via GDOCS
If Damon were honest, he wasn’t a slobbering drunk. Part of it had been an act, as his will to even lift a bottle to his mouth took more energy than he was willing to give. Time had slowed, his lethargy glued him to Bonnie and Enzo’s couch. He had lost a wife, a son, and best friend in one swift kick to the nether. So, he had to keep close to his best friends for fear of losing them right before his eyes, too.
The same bottle of bourbon had gone unfinished since Elena’s departure, but just gripping it had helped. Although he did reek of alcohol, his wits were mostly about him. What stopped him from drowning his sorrows fully was a glimmer of hope, an ability she had instilled in Damon. He couldn’t ruin himself completely. What if she came back?
That thought had not crossed his mind when Bonnie sent him packing to take a--he paused to sniff himself and grimaced--much needed shower. Bourbon bottle in one hand, keys in the other, he unlocked the door and ventured inside. The booze was discarded on the stand with the keys, his shirt removed and flung carelessly to the floor.
Just as he was about to unbutton his pants, he hesitated. Something was different. He lifted his head, vision swimming with the sight plastered before him, and immediately dropped to his knees: it was Elena, dressed from a time years behind them.
“Elena,” he breathed out in disbelief. Was it really her, or had he actually imbibed more alcohol than he realized? A suspicious glance was ruefully cast at the bourbon in question, then immediately returned to the embodiment of love and grace in his--their--living room. It only took him two more seconds to get back on his feet and stumble over the distance between them to wrap her tightly in his embrace.
“Elena,” this time he all but whimpered her name, unable to believe that she was here again. “God, I’ve missed you.”
Nothing made sense. When she awoke, not only was she not in Mystic Falls anymore, but she was reasonably certain she wasn’t even in the proper time period. Unless the world had taken bringing back past aesthetics and trends very seriously? Then she could have sworn she was in the 1920’s.
Thankfully she didn’t have to wonder too long, because after wandering around for a while- attempting to find the place that the letter she received described- she ran into a familiar face.
It was a tearful reunion with her best friend, but it shouldn’t have been possible. She never thought she would see Bonnie again. Wasn’t that how this was supposed to work? The former vampire was linked to the witch, as long as Bonnie was alive, Elena would never wake up.
At first, she panicked, thinking that Bonnie died and that she was somehow in between, but after she managed to calm down, the other woman explained everything the best she could. It was a lot to wrap her head around, but at least they were both alive. Elena wanted so desperately for her friend to be able to live a long and happy life- she sacrificed everything for it- and she was thrilled to hear that it hadn’t been in vain.
But then, she told her about Damon. Bonnie hadn’t gone into too much detail, but Elena knew that she was here before. Immediately, all her questions were pushed aside. All she could think of was seeing him. They already lost each other too many times for him to have to go on one more second without her.
She was pacing the living room floor when the door opened, and she froze- watching him discard the bottle. Elena didn’t know why she couldn’t move, it was as if her feet were glued to the floor. She couldn’t even bring herself to rush forward as he fell to his knees. All she could do was stare at him.
He looked so defeated like he had been through hell and was spit back into this world a shell of the man she knew and loved. Sure, he looked haggard and older than she remembered, but he was still Damon.
When his arms wrapped around her, it snapped her out of whatever had a hold on her, and she clung to him tightly. “Damon, I’ve missed you so much.” God, it felt so good to be back in his embrace.
It didn’t matter that she was quite clearly not the same Elena he had married, she was wearing a dress he could never forget. The memory of a roll in the hay with her wearing that briefly crossed his mind as he held on to her as though she were the only thing keeping him alive. In many ways, that was truly the case.
The first night in the apartment without her had been haunting. It gave rise to the false projection Stefan and forced him to see: a life without Elena, one designed to scare him out of wanting the suburbian fantasy. Eventually, Damon knew he would have gotten back on his feet and moved on, to a degree. He would never get over Elena, there would never be another love to fill his heart, and he accepted that. Learning to live with it was the real trick.
Now, he didn’t have to. Now, he had a brand new conundrum.
Face buried in her hair, he inhaled the scent of her and exhaled relief. It didn’t matter, he reminded himself, that she wouldn’t remember becoming a mother. In the end, whether human or vampire, Damon was selfish. As long as he had Elena, he could want for nothing else. While the fact remained that he desperately missed his son, that was something he would have to bottle up, at least for a little while.
With that thought in mind, he slid his hands up to cup either side of her face and regarded her appreciatively, lovingly. Emotions were heightened as a vampire, that much was true, but they soared as a human. Never wasting a moment, he pressed an urgent kiss to her lips. Only then could he bring himself to mumble words a hair’s breadth from her mouth.
“I know the feeling. Welcome back, Sleeping Beauty.”
She buried her face against his neck, breathing him in. How long had she been asleep? For Elena, it only felt like a moment, a minuscule blip in time. It seemed like minutes ago she was dancing with him in the spot where they met, telling him to live his life- to find a way to be happy without her. The last thing she wanted was for him to sit around and wait for her. She couldn’t fathom the thought of Damon losing himself to grief.
Elena was prepared to sleep peacefully for decades, knowing that her friends got to live long happy lives. She made peace within herself knowing that fact. It was her endless amount of hope that allowed her to do so. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have been able to bear it, because this wasn’t how it was supposed to be. She was supposed to be there for all of it. She was meant to witness it, but if she gave in to those thoughts she would have broken down, and she couldn’t let any of them see that- especially not Damon.
She didn’t know how any of this was possible, but she was given the ultimate gift. The chance she should have had to live her life with the man she loved and the people she cared about.
When his hands moved to frame her face, she allowed herself to get lost in his kiss. It was then she knew that she didn’t care ‘how’ or ‘why’. All that mattered was this. “It feels like I just fell asleep...but you,” she began, slipping her hands up his chest and gasping softly when she felt his heart beating at a quicker- dare she say ‘normal’- pace beneath her fingertips. She had intended on questioning how he looked older, but that heartbeat told her everything she needed to know.
Lifting her head to lock her wide eyes with his, she kept her hand over his chest. “...You’re human.”
Grateful now for that spark of optimism Elena had managed to instill, Damon smiled at her. It felt like it had been years since he’d gotten to do that, but in reality it had been, what--a week? He hadn’t been keeping track. Without that sliver of hope to guide him, he could have arrived home to their room in Goodland in a drunken haze. What then? He wouldn’t have been able to answer her with another kiss, then sweep her back into his embrace with a spin. Human strength still afforded him the ability to do that.
“Human, yep,” he finally responded, but unwilling to detach himself from her. She was the most warmth he’d let himself feel in days. Only then did his smile fade, if only out of reluctance to bring her up to speed. Distracting himself by tucking her hair behind her ear, his other hand sought one of hers at his chest to grasp it tightly. He didn’t realize it, but his wedding band was visible.
“This is gonna be a lot, Elena,” he cautioned, strikingly blue eyes searching hers for a sign he should continue. “You might want to sit down for this. But, I need you to know that the only thing I care about is that you’re here, and I love you, Elena. Alright?”
Elena’s laugh bounced off the walls as she was spun around. Damon truly was her happy place. Through all the ups and downs of their story, that one fact remained true. Even during the times where she was so angry with him she couldn’t think straight, or when she felt like she wouldn’t ever stop crying- Damon possessed the uncanny ability to make her deliriously happy.
That laugh died on her lips not long after it began however. His words chased it away just as quickly as he brought it on.
Biting her bottom lip, she nodded at his words. Elena was a lot of things, but she wasn’t the naive girl she once was. She knew the moment she laid eyes on Bonnie that this was going to be complicated.
Her gaze left his when she felt the cool metal against the skin of her hand. Cursing her eyes that widened in shock, she reached with her free hand to run her fingertips across the ring. Elena hadn’t ever been the best at hiding her emotions, even when she desperately wanted to in order to spare others, she was the kind of person who wore her feelings on her sleeve- visible for the world to see. “I know you do,” she whispered- thankful that her voice at least didn’t crack. “You’re right though...I think I need to sit.”
Her mind was drowning in all the potential scenarios she was about to hear, and she made a conscious effort to break through the surface. She needed to hear it from him, and not try to lose herself in all the ‘what-ifs’.
It was going to be a lot, he knew. With the tightest of smiles, Damon nodded faintly at her. He could only imagine the myriad of thoughts flying through that beautiful head. For all Elena’s positive thinking, he knew she could leap to all kinds of intriguing (albeit detrimental) conclusions. He didn’t want to leave her in the dark. Long before he had even married her, Damon had vowed not to keep any secrets. He was an open book, now it was just a matter of how much of it she wanted read aloud to her.
So, he bent at the knees and swept Elena gracefully into his arms. Forehead pressed to hers, he breathed her in one more time before moving to sit down on the couch. With her frame situated over his, he shifted an arm to wrap around her waist and kept a steady grip on one of her hands in a show of the utmost support.
Even if he wanted to lie to her, there would be evidence to contravene the deceit all around the apartment. Their bedroom had ornately framed photos that had replaced the constantly cycling digital ones. His phone, now a scroll that looked like it had fallen out of Hogwarts, would be a dead giveaway, too, if ever they returned to the present.
He lifted her hand up to graze the knuckles with a kiss, then began weaving his tale. “I’m years ahead of you now, beautiful. Took a while for Bonbon to get you of that coma, but she did it without any consequences. It was hell though…” His eyes seemed to glaze over in recollection of the darkest period of his life, the time when she slept and he had become a murderous puppet. Those stories could wait.
“But, things had a way of working out for you and me.” He tilted his head back to smile at her. It looked as though he still couldn’t altogether believe she was there with him. “You became a doctor, I owned a bar, and… we got married.”
Elena’s mind might have been heavy, but her body felt weightless as she was effortlessly swept up into his arms. She clung to him as if her life depended on it, and if she were honest with herself? It very much did.
Once they were comfortably settled on the couch, she shifted so her head could rest easily on his shoulder- her hand holding fast to his. Elena was ready to hear his tale, even if a part of her may have wanted to live in ignorance for a little while longer. Who could blame her for that? She just got him back, she just got her life back. Why was it that every time something good happened, their world just couldn’t help but throw something at them? She knew Bonnie would say it was the universe’s way of finding balance, but after everything, didn’t they deserve a break?
She listened carefully, and quietly as he spoke, her heart feeling heavy at times. He was years ahead of her? He had this whole life with her, one that they dreamed about together. Wasn’t that what she wanted for them? Wasn’t that the whole point of taking the cure together? So, why did she feel like she missed it? It was hard to wrap her mind around all of it.
Damon got everything she always believed he deserved with another version of herself. Maybe that wasn’t the right way of viewing it, because it wasn’t necessarily another Elena. It was her right? She was just displaced in time- and that realization hit her like a ton of bricks.
She couldn’t help the tears that welled up and blurred her vision. It was a mix of happiness for him and sadness for herself. Because yes, she did feel like she had missed this amazing life. It was silly, wasn't it? For her to worry that he may miss that future Elena? That he may wish it was her with him instead of the girl she was today?
Elena finally managed to lift her head off of his shoulder to look at him. “Bonnie told me I was here before, but I didn’t really understand.” Running her fingers over his ring again, she sighed. “But it makes sense now. She was here with you. The Elena of your time?” Her heart broke for him and herself, she couldn’t imagine what it must have been like losing her all over again.
Saying it aloud felt strange, almost foreign. Despite everything they’d been through together and apart, he couldn’t quite wrap his mind around the universe’s latest attempt to make things more complicated. He wished he didn’t have to tell her any of this, that somehow all those memories could go flying into that pretty little head of hers, but he doubted that possibility. It was almost as distressing as when Ric had wiped all the memories of their love story from her mind, only this time he didn’t have his best friend to blame.
He knew that look on her face. Squinting at her, Damon tried to dig deeper under the surface to work out what she might be thinking. Releasing her hand to cup the side of her face, his expression turned insistent. He may not have been a mind reader, but he’d been by Elena’s side for years. He could wager a pretty good guess.
“You were here with me, Elena,” he insisted. “Whether it’s you from three years ago, ten years from now, I don’t care. Hell, it could be you from when you hated me and I’d still be happy to at least have you nearby, because I love you, Elena. That’s all that matters to me. You know that. Don’t you?” He nearly ran out of steam by the end, worry making its round at his inquiry.
Stroking the side of her face, gaze wandering over her features as though in memorization of them, he shook his head. “Like I mind if I get to relive all kinds of old experiences with you again.”
Elena felt the tears that had been threatening to fall, slip out of her eyes and roll down her cheeks to meet his hand. Deep down she knew that even if she didn’t express her thoughts, he would be able to read her mind. She never could hide anything from him, even if she had possessed the ability to keep her expressions from allowing Damon to read her like a book? He would have somehow known. This magnetic force of a man that she fell for, always knew. It was one of the things she loved most about him.
Leaning into his touch, she took a deep ragged breath. Elena didn’t question the truth of his words, but perhaps she had needed to hear them? It was ridiculous of her to be jealous of her future self, almost as ridiculous as it was for her to doubt for one second that he would ever compare and find that he came up short with who she was now, but that little voice in the back of her head that planted that seed of doubt.
Damon quickly stifled that voice, though, and made her heart feel like it was going to beat right out of her chest. Leaning forward she pressed her forehead to his. “I know,” she said softly. “I know. It’s just hard to think of us having this life together that I can’t remember because I haven’t lived it yet. I don’t want you to feel robbed of that, because whatever it was that brought me here, brought me from the wrong time.”
There she said it, the confirmation that his suspicions had been right. That she was being entirely ridiculous.
“Wrong time?” Damon shook his head, though managed to do so without breaking contact from her. Any fraction of a second separated from Elena was a second too long. Every day that he’d spent numb and laying uselessly on Enzo and Bonnie’s couch had been one dreaming of her coming back to him. Granted Grayson had been involved in the reunion, he couldn’t ask for more than just this right now.
He also couldn’t bring himself to give up that part of their shared future together, not yet. This was already a lot for her to handle. Somehow Damon would find a way to hide those pictures before she could see them and ask him about them.
“I’m not the one that got robbed here, Elena,” he countered. “Trust me, I’d give anything for you to be able to remember the life you get to have. That’s not because I want to change you or want something more for me. I want that for you. This is enough for me, and I’m not gonna be sorry to have you back. It’s just been me, that bottle,” he paused to nod at the half-full culprit on the stand, “and Bonnie and Enzo’s couch. I’d much rather be here with you in this life that we get now.”
With each passing second, Elena allowed Damon’s words to push all the intrusive thoughts from her spinning mind. She had so many questions for him, so many things she wanted to know about the life they had, but she wouldn’t ask a single one of them. Although a part of her was screaming to know, there was a stronger part who didn’t want to hear about it. That was the part that was protecting her from any and all pain.
While she was certain she could have found joy in stories of her future, it could potentially dictate what she chose to do with her new life. This was a gift of epic proportions, and she didn’t want to walk through this existence with the shadow of the other looming over her. Elena knew herself well enough to know that she would try to live up to her future self, and that wasn’t the way she wanted to live.
“I think that maybe it’s better this way,” she said- meeting those strikingly blue eyes that were so full of love and adoration that it brought a fresh set of tears to her own. “That I can’t remember. This is enough for me too, Damon. As long as I’m with you, I don’t care about what happened or what is supposed to happen. You get to live this twice, do you know how remarkable that is?”
There was more she wanted to say, but the bit about him and the couch caught her off guard. Her eyebrows arched, and she blinked for a few moments before speaking again. “I’m sorry. What? Bonnie and Enzo?”
Uncertain if he could call it fortuitous, he accepted her words regardless. He always did. Whatever she wanted, Damon would go to hell and back to ensure that Elena got it. While he didn’t quite have the supernatural skills required of that kind of feat, one would be hard-pressed to deny him an attempt. There was a grain of truth to what she said, he ultimately realized. He did get to see her face when he inevitably proposed again, provided the Entity or whatever the hell else was in charge gave him the chance.
As he mulled over that, he hardly heard her questioning the state of affairs between Bonnie and Enzo. Damon had forgotten she had slept through Bonnie’s great love story, that Elena’s memories of Enzo wouldn’t be… ideal. Despite that, he rested his head on her shoulder to laugh. God, did it feel good to laugh around her again. His chest, his soul felt infinitely lighter already. She would always be his one and only salve.
“Spoiler alert, my former cellblock bestie and current bestie are head over heels. It’s been a thing. He makes her happy, so… I don’t have to pretend I can kill him,” he mused. “He’s still a vampire, so… that’s a conversation I’m betting they’ll have later. Then again…” His thoughts drifted back to the Cure still coursing in Elena’s veins. Technically, he hadn’t taken it from her yet.
“Never mind,” he decided, lifting up to look at her again. “Just know that… Bonnie went through a lot, but she’s fine now. You know her, always comes out on top.”
Elena wasn’t entirely sure if she believed what she told him or not. She wanted to believe it, though she was certain that she wouldn’t ever be able to fully push the thoughts of the life he had with her before away. She would try though, and once Elena Gilbert set her mind to something? Well, there wasn’t any swaying her.
Her fingers found their way into his hair when his head rested on her shoulder, and she couldn’t help but laugh with him. The sound was like music to her ears, and brought her back to that first summer they spent together in the Salvatore Boarding House. The days had been filled with so much laughter back then when they managed to come up for air from his bed. Their love was brand new and in some ways? It felt like it was new all over again now.
“I can’t believe...Bonnie and Enzo. This is crazy. All of this is crazy.” If her best friend was happy though, she would be happy for them both. It was good to hear that amidst the chaos that so often seemed to take over their lives.
Although it pained her to break contact with him for even a second, she slipped off his lap and moved to grab the half-empty bottle he discarded earlier. “This is crazy,” she repeated- tossing it back.
“Honey, I haven’t even hit half of the crazy train,” he grimaced as she stood up. Losing contact with her was almost a punch in the gut, but he coped. She was still in the room with him and there couldn’t be any chance that she was on the verge of disappearing. He hoped. At least he had been wise enough not to be a complete drunken lout in her absence, otherwise this reunion wouldn’t have gone as well as it had.
“Whoa, whoa,” he stood up suddenly, reaching out for the bottle. “First of all, Bonnie and Enzo aren’t that crazy, but I’ll give you some of that crazy if you’re ready for it.” He wiggled his fingers at the bourbon, waiting for her to hand it over. If they spent the rest of the night talking about their weird lives and drinking, he was perfectly fine with that. It had just been a long time since he’d sat around drinking with Elena since the birth of their child.
He’d practically sworn it off unless he was around Ric.
“Your baby bro is here from right when Silas… y’know,” he didn’t need to finish that part. “He’s fine. I made sure. Well, he’s emo as hell, but he’s fine. Bombshell number two…” He took a swig of the bourbon, then offered it back to her. “Ready? Jenna’s here.”
The bourbon burned her throat in a way she hadn’t expected. She couldn’t remember the last time she drank something this strong without her vampire tolerance, and the way it hit her was written all over her face as she stuck her tongue out. “Yeah, going to have to get used to that.” Elena supposed that there was a great deal she was going to have to re-learn about being human.
“Oh, I’m ready,” she replied with a little smirk before handing him the bottle. She could deal with whatever crazy he threw at her, right? Especially if it took her mind off of what they were discussing before, but then again...maybe not.
“Jer,” Elena said softly, recalling the day he died. She hadn’t thought of it in years, because she was scared to go back there. Losing her brother was the worst moment of her life, she couldn’t face it, couldn’t accept it and although he eventually came back? It still wasn’t something she could think about, so she shook her head in an attempt to shake the thoughts from her mind. Damon said he was fine, but Elena knew Jeremy- she couldn’t imagine he was as fine as he would like people to believe.
Elena reached to plant her hand on the stand where the bourbon was before she picked it up. She had to fight the urge to run to her brother immediately, it didn’t take long for her to think about something else, however, because Damon said Jenna was here.
Grabbing the bottle, she tossed it back again, taking a bigger drink than before, tolerance and taste be damned. “Jenna.” Her eyes welled up with those stupid tears again, and she laughed a little manically. “How is any of this possible?”
He knew that laugh. It had been a long time since he last heard it, but he knew it. Nobody lived and breathed emotions as strongly as the love of his life. He inched over to her, gently reaching for the bottle this time in an attempt to coax it from her grasp. It would be the pot and the kettle if he cautioned her against downing the rest of that bourbon, and as much as he felt inclined to do so now that they were in this remarkably unusual position, Damon had grown. He knew better.
“Look,” he began quietly, bottle set aside once again so that his hands could grasp either side of her. “I wish I had those answers. All I know is some holier than thou thing in the sky, probably, calls itself the Entity and brings us here to Goodland. It likes to send us all over the world, and right now we’re in the twenties, so apparently, it’s got time travel going for it, too.”
From Katherine to Klaus, Silas to Kai, his own mother and the Heretics to Sybil, the list of enemies in their shared background was borderline endless. He couldn’t discern where to place the Entity, as it had given him his son and wife once only to take them both and his best friend in one fell swoop. While he wasn’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth and turn away Elena for not being caught up in time with him, he honestly was at a loss as to what more he should do. Not just for her, but for himself, which was an odd consideration if he let it linger too long. Damon seldom thought of himself first, because Elena was (and remained) his prerogative.
The events that happened after she was put into that godforsaken mystical coma would be hard for her to hear, let alone accept. Right now, the present had to be the focus. Running his fingers down the side of Elena’s face, gaze piercing her own, he pursed his lips in an unfortunate smile. It wouldn’t be easy, but when had they ever settled for easy?
“It’s gonna be a lot, but we’ll take it slow. Elena, I swear I’ll tell you everything you want and need to know, but not all at once. Okay? I’ve missed you… so much, I…” trailing off, Damon suddenly felt tempted to contradict himself and grab the bottle again. Resisting the urge, however, he shut his eyes and bolstered his nerves. “Let’s just have this moment, for us. Forget everything else for now.” The “please” that followed was uttered so quietly, he wasn’t entirely convinced he’d even said it, but he had.
All he wanted was to hold her and forget the past week had even transpired.
It almost didn’t register with her that Damon was slipping the bottle away from her grasp. It was incredibly tempting to just drown herself in the bourbon. If she did, she wouldn’t have to think about all of the things that were being thrown at her. Although Elena was incredibly thankful that she was no longer asleep, a part of her wondered if it would have been a blessing? This world was going to be hard. Even something like Jenna being alive and here was overwhelming.
Elena was trying desperately to keep it together. Emotions may have been heightened as a vampire but as a human? Well, she was slowly being reminded of how intense they could be. She couldn’t allow herself to fall apart though, especially not when Damon was caressing her face, and begging her to forget.
She was so wrapped up in her own thoughts, that she hadn’t even considered what he must be going through. The desperation in his voice and the little ‘please’ that was barely a whisper struck her to her very core. It was all it took to push all of her questions and selfishness aside.
Leaning forward, she rested her head against his chest, her arms wrapping around him tightly. “I’m sorry, Damon…” she began softly. She was apologizing for so many things- for allowing herself to drown a little, for the Elena he lost, for the life he lost, and for all the things she didn’t have any control over. Like leaving him for god knows how long when Kai turned their world upside down. “Help me forget?”
It was all he needed. He lifted her up into his arms again, memories of bringing her into their home the first time after the honeymoon fogged his mind. It strengthened his grip on her as he cradled her in his grasp, lips pressed fast against her temple. Not sharing the same memories wasn’t new territory, and yet this time it was vastly different. She had come too far back to remember all the things she had gotten to experience in her human life with him.
This was fine, he repeated to himself. They would get through the time difference once again, because they had a solid foundation between them. Damon’s love for Elena was absolute, had transcended time, pocket dimensions, and a mind wipe. She always brought him home, and though they had much to work through, he knew he couldn’t let her down by not doing the same; not a fraction of doubt would enter his heart--for both their sakes.
He made his way back to the stretch of all towards the bedrooms. Stopping short of the one he had taken up with her originally in, Damon reminded himself that it would not be a good idea. He still had to remove all traces of Grayson until the time was right to tell her, and god help anyone who went behind his back and spilled the beans. He wasn’t a vampire anymore, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t find a way to punish anyone who ruined her adjustment period.
So, for now Damon swept her into the undecorated spare room and placed her down on the bed. He leaned over her, Elena’s face held between his palms so that he could look at her closely, ever mesmerized by her, then kissed her again. This time, he made no move to pull away and interrupt their reunion with an exchange of despairing words. This was their time again. Damon intended to make every bit of it count for her return, and while she slept he could take care of any sign that would remind Elena that he had lived a life with her that would likely go unremembered.