Reluctance (2/2), for rakina Title: Reluctance Author:suemonroe Giftee:rakina Word Count: 17,500 Rating: NC-17 Pairing: Harry/Severus Warnings: AU, no DH. Disclaimer: The characters contained herein belong to J.K Rowling. No money is being made from this fiction, it is for entertainment purposes only. Summary: Harry comes out of hiding to discover that some things do change. AN: Much thanks to TM, without whom I would be a puddle of frustrated tears still trying to finish this. Also, thanks to Z for the very, very last minute help.
Sitting back in his chair several weeks later, Severus dropped the last mind-numbingly boring essay on top of a stack of similarly dreary attempts. Normally there was a student or two from each house that showed promise in potions, but this year there had been only three.
Most years this would have disturbed him far more than it did now. But in past years he hadn’t had such an interesting project to occupy his time. Over the weeks, pursuing Harry Potter had transformed from a passing interest into an obsession.
While part of him, a loud, insistent part, was impatient to get the wretched, irritating… maddeningly attractive young man into his bed, a larger part of him was satisfied with his progress. He had cornered Potter several times over the last few weeks, and each time the boy had responded beautifully to every provocation Severus sprung on him. Watching anger light Potter’s eyes was a treat Severus couldn’t deny himself.
He’d also managed several civil conversations. He’d learned that if he did not goad the boy, Potter was actually an intense, lively conversationalist. Potter’s time with the reclusive Croaker had broadened his knowledge of Wizarding history and traditions. Severus had immensely enjoyed the debates.
When the boy was a student, Severus had only seen flashes of intelligence in Potter and had wondered why Albus expected so much from a mediocre child. But it appeared now, Potter had hidden his intelligence, or he reluctantly acknowledged in the privacy of his mind, Severus himself had not looked hard enough.
Glancing at his clock and seeing there was still an hour before curfew and his rounds, Severus pushed away from his desk. Perhaps Potter was in the staff room, the boy often marked assignments there this time of evening. Maybe Severus could provoke the boy into a passionate argument. The flush on the boy’s face and fiery green eyes as Potter made his case was a pleasure to watch. Severus often wondered if he’d see the same look on Potter’s face when Severus slowly slipped his cock into the boy’s tight arse.
%%%
Approaching the slightly open door of the staffroom, Severus automatically paused and looked through the crack to see who was in the room, old habits died hard. In the far corner of the room, Delores Umbridge had Harry Potter cornered as she hissed at him. Severus couldn’t hear what she was saying, but Potter had a strange expression. If Severus didn’t know better he’d say the boy was afraid of the odious woman.
The last several days the foul minion of the Ministry had become quite insistent on seeing Potter’s lesson plans. Potter and Minerva had been stonewalling her, saying the plans weren’t complete as Potter was revamping the stagnant History of Magic course. It appeared she was through taking excuses.
Having seen enough, Severus threw open the door and stormed into the room. “There you are Potter,” he snapped. “I have been waiting outside your door for twenty minutes, you inconsiderate oaf.”
Potter goggled at him. Umbridge tried to glare at him, but her glares were pitiful things, toads had never frightened Severus.
Ignoring the woman, Severus scowled at Potter. “Well, boy? Do you or do you not wish to discuss engaging my services to brew Lupin’s Wolfsbane?”
Nose wrinkling in disgust at the mention of the werewolf, Umbridge turned to fully face Severus. “Mr. Potter and I were having a private discussion. I’m afraid I’ll need a few more minutes of his time,” she simpered dismissively
Severus watched in amusement as Potter slipped around the woman and made for the door. Grabbing Severus’ upper arm the boy steered them both out the door. “So sorry,” the boy said with noticeable insincerity. “But the full moon is in a couple of days. Don’t want Remus running around without his potion do you?”
“But the full moon was last week,” Umbridge protested uselessly. Potter was already out the door, dragging Severus down the hallway.
They turned a corner and the staffroom door was out of sight. Dropping Severus’ arm, Potter slumped bonelessly against the wall. The boy scrubbed his hands over his face and looked up at Severus with tired eyes. “Thanks,” he said softly.
Severus narrowed his eyes. This wasn’t the first time he’d seen Potter all but cower before that woman. Determined to find out why Potter, who had stood up to the Dark Lord, was intimidated by Dolores Umbridge, Severus gestured to the boy to stand up.
“I believe your quarters are closest,” Severus stated coolly. For a moment a rebellious spark flared in Potter’s eyes. When Severus arched a questioning brow, Potter sighed heavily and nodded.
Shortly, Severus again found himself inside Potter’s rooms. The space had a more lived in air than it had earlier in the year. Parchments littered the coffee table, books were scattered around the room, and a set of robes were tossed over the back of a chair.
He allowed Potter to dither around at the liquor cabinet; the boy had excellent taste in spirits after all. Eventually Potter dropped into the armchair across from Severus, the young man’s head hung down as he avoided Severus’ eyes.
Severus nearly chuckled at the boy’s dramatics. “Why do you allow that woman to browbeat you?”
As Severus expected Potter’s head shot up. “I don’t,” he demanded petulantly. “It’s just… while I was at school… she… oh, hell, Snape, just stay out of my business.”
The boy unconsciously rubbed the back of his right hand; Severus could make out a pale silvery scar. Moving quickly, he snatched Potter’s hand and tugged. The boy fell out of his chair to his knees. Severus kept a tight grip on Potter’s wrist and studied the scar. ‘I must not tell lies,’ was clearly etched into the flesh.
“Where did you get this?” Severus asked in a soft, deadly voice. He had his suspicions, but waited for the boy to confirm them.
Potter tried to tug his hand away, but Severus refused to release him. “Fifth year,” Potter snapped. “Let go of me.”
Softly running his thumb over yet another mark the boy wore, Severus hissed, “Be still, boy. I’m not going to hurt you.”
The young man stilled immediately, his verdant eyes met Severus’. “I didn’t think you would,” Potter whispered.
Awareness thrummed between them for an electric moment, and then Potter’s eyes dropped shyly. Severus’ eyes narrowed. It was suddenly clear to him that Harry Potter, savior of the Wizarding world, had very little experience in romantic entanglements. How that was possible, Severus couldn’t begin to guess.
Getting back to the matter at hand, Severus kept up his slow strokes. “That woman did this?”
Potter snorted. “I did it.”
“Potter,” Severus began slowly. “I would like to know the truth.”
Eyes darting between the scar on his hand, and Severus’ face, Potter pulled a face and sighed. “It was a quill. Cai said it was a blood quill.” Potter shrugged. “She used had me write lines with it.”
Torn between curiosity at who Cai was and confusion, Severus’ brow furrowed. “And how would that make you fear her?” he asked, keeping to the topic under discussion.
“If she would do that to a child,” Potter started softly. “How far would she go now that I’m grown? She’s the one that sent the dementors to Surrey.” Potter shuddered. “I’m not scared of her, more of what she might do if I turn my back on her.”
“Understandable,” Severus agreed smoothly while his mind plotted revenge. “It is never wise to turn your back on an enemy. However I do not believe she will be so obvious now that you are grown. People like her prefer targets that are not able to fight back.”
Potter suddenly seemed to realize Severus still held his hand; he tried to surreptitiously pull it free. “Are you uncomfortable with this?” Severus asked softly.
“No,” Potter snapped. “I just figured out why you’re being so nice. I’ve grown up now, can fight back.”
Severus stiffened at the accusation, but didn’t release Potter. He recognized when he was being provoked. “I do not recall that you ever feared me, Potter,” he said quietly. Dropping his voice to a near whisper he added, “Not even the night you stood by and watched me murder your mentor.”
For the first time, Potter seriously tried to pull away; he nearly succeeded in pulling Severus down to the floor with him. “I didn’t stand by,” Potter shouted. “If it wasn’t for that body-bind Dumbledore used, I would have stopped it all from happening.”
Using the hand he held, Severus pulled Potter up on his knees until their faces were nearly touching. “You would have died had the headmaster not bound you,” he hissed. “Now don’t you think it’s time you stopped trying to distract me, boy? Why do you squirm and fidget every time I touch you?”
Potter froze. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said woodenly.
With a sigh, Severus realized he’d have to change his methods. The boy had truly learned to control his temper. In the past, goading the boy into anger was a surefire way of pushing him to blurt out information he’d rather keep hidden.
“Would you like to know why I’ve noticed your reactions?” Severus asked. Potter didn’t speak, but tilted his head in curiosity. That was enough for Severus.
Taking a chance, and a deep breath, Severus looked down. He couldn’t look into Potter’s eyes, not if there was a chance he would be rejected. He watched his own thumb trace the letters of Potter’s scar.
“I’ve watched you since you’ve returned. Surely, you’ve noticed?”
Out of the corner of his eye, Severus saw Potter nod. He could feel the young man’s eyes as they seemed to bore into him.
“It is obvious to all that you have grown up, matured into a confident, powerful man. One that I find attractive.”
Several tense moments passed, and Severus dared to glance up. Seeing no disgust in Potter’s eyes, he breathed a little easier. Potter was staring at him with a puzzled look, and Severus was reminded of his earlier thoughts about Potter’s level of experience.
Potter’s tongue darted out and licked his lips, and Severus eyes fell to Potter’s lips.
“Attractive? I’m… that is…” Potter stuttered as a blush slowly crept up from his neck to cover his cheeks. Ducking his head, Potter tried to turn away.
With his free hand, Severus lightly grasped Potter’s chin and pulled till the young man faced him once again. Then Severus quieted the boy the way he’d longed to for months now.
Softly he brushed his lips over Potter’s. The boy made a small ‘oh’ sound; Severus immediately took advantage of the open mouth. Slowly, giving Potter an opportunity to pull back, Severus traced the lush, slightly moist lips with his tongue.
Potter’s left hand flew to Severus’ chest, but did not push him away. Instead the hand fisted in Severus’ robes and Potter was the one to close the distance between them. Assured he wouldn’t be pushed away, Severus dipped his tongue inside Potter’s mouth and stroked it along Potter’s teeth.
Severus was pleased a moment later when Potter’s tongue hesitantly met his own. Severus allowed Potter to lead the kiss for several moments before he slowly pulled back.
Looking down at the young man, Severus took a moment to appreciate the reddened lips and slightly dazed expression in Potter’s eyes. He watched as awareness crept back into Potter’s eyes, the young man blinked twice and quickly got to his feet, this time Severus let him. Turning his back on Severus, Potter stared blankly into the unlit fireplace.
Taking his time, Severus stood, straightened his robes, and cleared his throat. Wide eyed, Potter whirled around.
“Tomorrow is Friday,” Severus said easily. “Would you care to join me for dinner in my quarters?”
Nervously biting his lip, Potter hesitated.
“It’s just dinner, Potter,” Severus snapped. “If it makes you feel better, I promise not to bite.”
Potter snorted with reluctant amusement. “I’d like that,” he mumbled.
“The biting? Or the dinner invitation?” Severus asked with a smirk.
Blushing bright red, Potter giggled a surprisingly attractive sound from a grown man.
“The dinner invitation, you great prat.”
The smile was still on Potter’s face when Severus walked over and brushed a chaste kiss across the boy’s mouth. “Very well,” Severus murmured. “I’ll look forward to seeing you about seven.”
Potter followed him to the door, and Severus could feel the young man’s bemused eyes on him till he turned the corner at the end of the hall. Once out of sight of Potter, Severus stopped and leaned against the wall. Breathing a sigh of relief, he wondered how he had gotten through the last half hour without humiliating himself.
He still had trouble believing Potter had agreed to dinner. Now that he had set this thing in motion, Severus questioned his own abilities. Could he be what Potter needed? What he deserved?
Pushing away the uncharacteristic self-doubts, Severus shoved off the wall, and continued to his rooms. I am a Slytherin, he reminded himself. Cunning people who use any means to reach their ends.
The sun was shining brightly, a slight breeze stirred the air, Hogsmeade was bustling, but Harry Potter hardly noticed the stares and whispers. He was still replaying the events of the night before.
He had kissed a man. Severus Snape at that. And Snape seemed to want more. Or at least that’s what Harry figured the dinner invitation indicated. Would they just eat, or would there be more kissing?
Seeing the Three Broomsticks up ahead, Harry sighed. It was times like this he really missed Ron and Hermione. They’d always been the ones he’d taken his problems to. He knew he could use the Floo, but it wasn’t the same as talking to them in person.
He was startled out of his thoughts when a heavy hand landed on his shoulder and turned him about.
“I’ve been calling your name for half a block, lad,” Cai Croaker scolded gently. “What are you doing walking around with your head in the clouds?”
Scowling, Harry shrugged. “Was thinking.”
“Thinking? Didn’t think you knew how,” the older man said with a laugh. “Come on, lad. Buy me lunch and tell ole Cai what’s troubling you.”
Knowing full well Cai wouldn’t stop pestering him till he had the whole story, Harry agreed. Walking along side the Unspeakable, Harry brightened. Cai was one of the few people Harry trusted to be straight with him.
Finding an isolated table near the window, Harry and Cai ordered sandwiches and a couple of pints of Rosmerta’s ale. Chatting companionably with the older man while they waited for the food, Harry began to relax.
Though the Broomsticks was busy, their food arrived quickly, and Rosmerta kept the occasional forward admirers at bay. It didn’t take either man long to polish off the thick ham and cheese sandwiches. Leaning back with his second pint, Cai turned his dark eyes on Harry.
“So, lad, what’s on your mind?”
Echoing the older man’s movements, Harry sighed and explained the situation with Umbridge. Though it wasn’t the problem holding his attention at the moment, it was still important. That and Harry wasn’t comfortable talking about more personal things. He wanted, needed, someone to talk to about Snape, but wasn’t sure how to begin.
Harry finished up with Umbridge’s latest demands that Harry provide her with a comprehensive lesson plan for each level by the end of next week or face Ministry censure. “Thought I have no idea what she means by that,” Harry added angrily. Umbridge’s presence wore at his patience.
Cai pursued his lips and shook his head. “McGonagall hasn’t said anything about what her plans are?”
Harry shrugged. “She certainly hasn’t shared one with me. Just keeps telling me to put Umbridge off.”
Snorting derisively, Cai growled, “Old tabby, spent too much time around that scheming old man.”
Rolling his eyes, Harry ignored the snide remark. When they’d first met, Cai had vigorously voiced his opinion about Dumbledore’s methods. While Harry agreed that Dumbledore should have been more upfront with him, he preferred to give the former headmaster the benefit of the doubt. Harry was sure Dumbledore had been trying to do what was best for everyone.
Cai’s suddenly eyed Harry shrewdly. “You know, there’s a former classmate of yours. Made quite a name for himself as an unbiased reporter…”
“And?” Harry questioned anxiously.
The large shoulders shrugged. “Well, seems to me, if you spike the Minister’s guns, tell your story, there’s nothing they can do.”
An idea began to form, Harry began to smile wickedly. “Promoting open rebellion, Cai? I’m shocked. I thought you worked for the Ministry.”
“I do, lad. But the Minister has no friends in the Department of Mysteries.”
“But the Ministry passed a decree,” he remembered abruptly.
Cai clicked his tongue impatiently, and leaned forward, his eyes held a knowing smile. “That decree only applies to members of the Order.”
The light swiftly dawned. “I was never a member of the Order of the Phoenix.”
With a smug grin, the Unspeakable leaned back and lifted his pint in salute.
Quickly running through his plan, Harry could find no flaws. Relieved to have one worry off his mind, Harry laughed softly. “You’re a crafty old sod,” he said fondly.
Scratching his forehead, Cai laughed. “I am at that. Now that’s out of the way, why don’t you tell me what’s really bothering you.”
“Can’t fool you, huh?” Harry asked rhetorically. “It’s, well, I don’t…”
Noticing the nearly empty glass in his hand, Harry hurriedly suggested, “Let me a refill. You want another?”
The mug was gently taken from his hand, and Cai frowned at him. “Can’t distract me either, Harry. Are you in trouble?”
“No!” Harry snapped. “Maybe… yes. Oh, hell, I don’t know what I am.”
With immense patience, Cai simply said, “You know you can tell me anything.” He leaned back in his chair, nursed his ale and waited for Harry to speak.
Not knowing how or where to start, Harry blurted out the first thing that came to mind. “I kissed Snape. Or he kissed me.” Harry frowned, that didn’t sound right. “Well, both I think.”
The sudden choking sound across the table caused Harry to look up in concern. His eyes widen indignantly when he realized Cai was struggling not to laugh. “You arse,” he growled. “I’m trying to tell you something important, and you laugh at me.”
Stumbling to his feet, Harry turned to leave, when he was magically forced back into his chair. Struggling against Cai’s spell, Harry snarled, “Let me go.”
“Won’t do it, lad,” Cai said softly. “Didn’t mean to get you all riled, I’m sorry I laughed.”
The sincerity in the older man’s voice soothed Harry’s outrage. He stopped fighting the magic holding him and it disappeared.
Cai signaled for another round and sat quietly while Rosmerta fussed over Harry and refilled their glasses. They both sipped their drinks, and then Cai looked over at Harry and waggled his brows. “Snape, huh? You’re a brave man, Harry Potter.”
Harry snorted, then he giggled, he tried to stop, but couldn’t. He’d never thought about it that way before, but it would take a brave person, or a foolish one, to consider a relationship with Severus Snape.
After several minutes, Harry got himself under control. Moistening his dry throat with ale, he tried to explain what was bothering him. “I don’t know what to do,” he complained plaintively.
Cai paled. “Ah, lad, I know I said I’d help, but if it’s the birds and the bees you’re looking for…”
Balling up his napkin, Harry threw it at the older man. “Don’t be stupid. I know the mechanics, its practical experience I’m having problems with.”
“You’ve never,” Cai made a rude gesture, “With anyone?”
Blushing, Harry growled, “When have I had time? First it was Voldemort, then afterwards I didn’t want anyone to know where I was.” Harry sighed and ran his hands through his hair in frustration. “I couldn’t just pick some stranger up at a bar…” He left unsaid the, I wouldn’t be able to trust them. But Cai heard it anyway.
“I see,” Cai said with an understanding nod. “But Snape’s not a stranger.”
“I know, but my parents, and Sirius, they hated each other, hell Snape hated me. I don’t understand it… any of it.” Harry knew he was babbling, but his thoughts were jumbled. It was all he could do to keep his seat and not pace the room like a caged lion. He was so confused.
“Calm down, lad,” Cai soothed. “Let’s take one thing at a time. You like him?”
Harry rolled his eyes. “Obviously, or I wouldn’t care.”
“Fine and you trust him?”
“Completely.” Harry was surprised at the lack of hesitation in his answer.
Cai nodded sagely. “Then what’s the problem? So he had a feud with your folks. They’re dead, lad. You can’t live your life for them.”
“I know, it’s just that…” Harry trailed off, he didn’t know how to tell Cai he was scared to let someone that close.
“Harry,” Cai called gently, getting Harry’s attention. “There’s no guarantees in affairs of the heart. You take it as it comes. Trust is fundamental though, if you have that, it’s a good start.”
Harry smiled. “Thanks,” he said simply, though he meant it with every fiber of his being.
Shrugging aside the thanks, Cai grinned. “I’ll leave the sexual instruction to old Snape. You know I saw him the other day. Hair seemed cleaner.”
Not knowing whether to laugh or scold the older man, Harry just shook his head. “You’re awful, you know that, right?”
Looking pleased with himself, Cai leaned forward and whispered, “Let’s just hope you won’t be saying that after a night with Snape.”
%%%
Looking down at his watch, Harry saw the hand slide fully on to the seven. Taking a deep breath, he lifted his hand and knocked on the wooden door. The door opened so swiftly, Harry’s hand was still upraised.
“Potter,” Snape drawled coolly. He gestured gallantly for Harry to enter. “I’m pleased to see you are prompt.”
Slightly confused by the mixed signals, Harry cautiously entered Snape’s chambers. He darted glances around the room. He’d never been in Snape’s rooms before, and was pleased to see the rumors of gothic splendor had been false. There wasn’t even that much green.
“Does it meet your approval?” Snape asked sharply.
Realizing he’d been obvious in his perusal, Harry flushed guiltily. “It’s nice,” he said hastily. “No coffins.”
He turned and looked at Snape who stood beside the door with one sardonic brow raised. “No coffins,” he repeated slowly.
Harry winced and closed his eyes. “Oh fuck, that came out wrong,” he whispered. Opening his eyes, he met Snape’s steadily. “I’m really nervous,” he admitted softly. “I’ve never…all this is new.”
Snape’s face lost its pinched look. “I had noticed your lack of experience,” he allowed. “Though I must admit some curiosity at how you reached twenty…”
“Three,” Harry supplied.
“Twenty three with such innocence.”
Harry sighed, he knew he’d have to discuss his lack of experience at some point, it wasn’t like he could hide it, but he hadn’t expected it to be so soon.
“Can we sit down?” Harry asked in a bid to stall.
He was surprised to see color heat Snape’s face.
“Forgive me,” Snape said softly. “Please have a seat,” he gestured to the sofa. “Would you care for a drink before dinner?”
“Please,” Harry agreed with a touch of desperation. Maybe alcohol would help ease his nerves.
In a shorter amount of time than Harry expected, Snape reappeared with a bottle and two wine glasses. Filling both glasses half-full, Snape handed one to Harry. “It is an elf-made red,” he explained quietly as he sat stiff-backed in the chair opposite Harry. “I’d noticed you did not have any in your collection and hoped it was because you were unfamiliar with them not that you disliked them.”
It was all Harry could do not to goggle at Snape; he’d never heard the older man run on about inconsequential subjects before. Taking an experimental sip, Harry was astonished at the mix of flavors that exploded on his tongue. “It’s really good,” he said with a small smile.
Some of the tension seemed to drain out of Snape’s shoulder and Harry was relieved he’d said something right tonight.
“I do not mean to discomfort you,” Snape began gently. “But I would like to know whatever you are willing to tell me.”
Chuckling dryly, Harry gave a half-hearted shrug. “Mostly, it’s just embarrassing. I never got around to it,” he admitted. “Umm, I…you know.” He made a slight movement with his hand.
“Masturbated,” Snape supplied with a slight smirk.
Feeling his cheeks heat, Harry nodded, “Yeah. But the thought of being with someone like that? Well, after everything that happened, I don’t trust that many people.”
It was a horrible, muddled explanation, but it was the best he could do.
“Yet you are here?” Snape asked disbelievingly.
Harry suddenly realized that Snape was as unsure, and nervous as Harry was. Strangely, it made Harry feel better. “When you helped me that day with the tea, well, I never thought for a moment that you wouldn’t. And I talked to Cai…”
“Cai?” Severus questioned imperiously. “That is the second time you’ve mentioned him.”
“Cai Croaker. You know, he’s an Unspeakable, he’s the one that trained me.”
Snape nodded thoughtfully. “I’ve heard of him, but never his given name. He is highly respected by many.”
Harry rolled his eyes. “He’s an arse. But smart. Anyway, he pointed out that trust is a good start.”
“Trust,” Snape said with a hint of suspicion. “And how far does your trust extend, Potter?” The older man got to his feet, bridged the scant distance between them and lowered himself on to the couch beside Harry.
“Does it encompass this?” Snape slowly reached out and grasped Harry’s hand.
Turning his hand so their palms were pressed together, Harry let his fingers intertwining with the Snape’s answer for him.
With his free hand, Snape gently brushed the back of his hand down Harry’s face. “And this?” The hand cupped his face, thumb caressing his cheek.
Careful not to dislodge the hand, Harry nodded.
Leaning forward, Snape fleetingly brushed his lips over Harry’s suddenly dry ones. “And this, Harry, does your notion of trust include this?”
“Yes,” Harry breathed against Snape’s mouth. “That is most definitely included.”
Not waiting for Snape’s next move, Harry leaned in and smashed his mouth against the other man. Snape’s teasing was all well and good in its place, but it wasn’t what Harry wanted right now. Now Harry wanted to feel what he’d missed in his isolation.
For a moment, Snape didn’t move, afraid he’d committed some grievous faux pas, Harry started to pull away. But Snape suddenly moved, arms wrapping around Harry’s back, Snape pulled him close and took control of the kiss.
Giving in to the passion he’d been trying to spark, Harry groaned softly. The sound seemed to spur Snape on. The older man pulled back, black eyes burning, lowering his head again to gently nip at Harry’s ear. “I knew you would not be passive,” Snape whispered between bites.
Harry couldn’t tell by the tone, if Snape was pleased by that or not. “Did you want me to be?”
“No, Harry.” Snape eased back until he could look into Harry’s eyes. “Never be anything but yourself. Not for me. Not for anyone.”
That was the second time Snape had called him Harry. Feeling bold, Harry asked, “Will you hex me if I call you Severus?”
The older man looked startled. Then a faint hint of color appeared on his cheeks. “Say it again,” Snape demanded huskily.
Tilting his head curiously, Harry whispered, “Severus.”
The banked fire in Snape’s eyes flared. “There’s a suggestion of Parseltongue in the way you say my name.”
Judging by Severus’ reaction, that was a very good thing. He was the first person who seemed to like Harry’s ability.
Smoothly getting to his feet, Severus extended a hand to Harry. “We should eat.”
Confused, Harry frowned. “You want to stop?”
“No, I do not. But there is no rush, Harry.”
Seeing Snape wasn’t really set on eating, Harry took his hand and allowed the older man to pull him up. Leaning into the older man’s body, Harry said in what he hoped was a suggestive voice, “I’m not really hungry right now.”
Harry swore he felt the heat from Snape’s burning gaze. “Be careful what you ask for, Harry.”
He might not know exactly what he was getting into, Harry knew he wanted it. “I’m a Gryffindor,” he reminded Snape. “We’re not known for careful.”
Snape began to smile, and Harry felt his knees grow weak. Not from lust, or attraction, but from fear. He’d seen that smile before, every time Snape had tried to have him expelled.
“You may live to regret that,” Snape growled. “Come with me.”
He used the hand he was still holding to pull Harry after him to a door on the far side of the room. Pushing open the door and stepping inside, Snape tugged Harry after him.
Harry had no time to be embarrassed. Snape had him stripped and laid out on the bed in no time at all. The older man tossed off his heavy outer robes leaving him standing in a pair of black trousers and nothing else. Sitting on the bed beside Harry, Snape quickly tugged off his boots, tossed them after the robe and stood.
Harry only got a quick impression of flat, ropy muscles and pale skin before the trousers were pooled at Snape’s feet and the other man stretched out beside him. Where a moment ago Snape acted so expeditiously, he now hesitated. Gathering his courage, Harry closed the distance; the first feel of smooth, warm skin against his own prompted a soft moan.
Snape gathered Harry in his arms, large strong hands trailed up and down Harry’s back. Lips brushed his, and then moved on to his neck, suckling at the sensitive skin there. Harry’s cock was hard and insistent on relief, unable to keep his hips still, Harry thrust against Snape’s stomach.
Severus growled against Harry’s neck, his hands drifted lower and gripped Harry’s arse and pulled their bodies roughly together. Squeezing a hand between their bodies, he murmured a spell, Harry felt a sudden slickness coat his cock. Snape’s hand wrapped around both their erections and he began to stroke them to the rhythm of Harry’s thrusts.
Feeling another cock against his, Snape’s cock, was incredible. Harry let his hands explore Severus’ back, slowly mapping each rib and indentation. When Snape’s strokes sped up, Harry unwittingly dug his nails into Snape’s back.
Far too soon, Harry felt his pending release tighten his balls. Burying his face in Severus’ neck, Harry thrust once more, and came. His orgasm felt as if it where ripped out of him as he shot his offering in the scant space between them.
He was still shuddering and fighting the darkness at the corners of his vision when he felt Snape jerk against him. A soft, ‘Harry,’ reached his ears.
They lay wrapped up in each other for endless moments. Harry had never felt so content. The warmth of another body next to his was wonderful. Knowing that it was Severus Snape that held him so tightly was indescribable.
Just when Harry thought he didn’t care if he ever moved from this spot, his stomach growled loudly. He experienced another first, Severus laughed. Not a dark chuckle, or nasty, cruel laughter at another’s expense, but a true, humor filled laugh. Harry thought it was one of the finest things he’d ever heard.
“I take it you are hungry now?” Snape asked with a hint of laughter still in his voice, making it sound all the better to Harry.
“I could eat,” Harry admitted wryly.
Early the next week, Severus dismissed his class early and made his way to the Great Hall. Slipping into the back, he found a shadowy corner and looked out over the assembled group. All first and second years were present, as was any student with a free period. Minerva sat proudly on the dais that replaced the head-table surrounded by Order members.
The speaker for this special presentation stood with his back to the crowd, talking quietly to Justin Finch-Fletchley, a respected reporter for the Daily Prophet. In the distance a clock struck ten and began to chime.
Climbing on the dais, Harry Potter didn’t have to say a word. His mere presence silenced the mass of students.
“Good morning,” he said clearly, even without a spell to amplify his voice it reached the far corners of the hall.
“The Ministry does not wish me to tell you this,” Potter began, and Severus could clearly see the bittersweet humor in Harry’s eyes as he invoked Albus Dumbledore’s memory. “But I’ve made a habit out of ignoring Ministry decrees.”
Shaking his head as visions of open rebellious eleven and twelve year olds ran rampant through Hogwart’s halls, Severus couldn’t deny the truth of Harry’s words. But the comment provoked laughter and Severus could see Harry begin to relax. He had worried over the younger man since he’d first heard this plan over a delayed dinner. He’d agreed it was logical, but worried what would happen if the Ministry caught wind of it.
However, it appeared his concern was for naught, everything ran smoothly. Harry completed his speech; the truth of the war was now a matter of public record. The Prophet had promised to run a special edition with the story, and Finch-Fletchley was so unbendingly unbiased, the coverage would be favorable.
Harry stood on the edge of the stage answering questions from the students, his eyes searching the room. An unexpected warmth filled Severus’ chest when he realized the young man was searching for him. Stepping out of the shadows, Severus waited, a moment later Harry spotted him. A relieved smile creased that beloved face, and Severus was content.
The bell for the next class rang ending the question and answer session. Students gave Severus a wide berth as they streamed out of the room, but Harry walked straight to him. “That went well,” he said easily.
Much of the awkwardness between the two of them had been resolved that first night. They had not spent a night apart in the intervening days. Early in the summer, Severus had decried the inconvenience of a live-in lover, now he wondered if he’d ever be able to return to his solitary state, should Harry tire of him.
“I must admit, you displayed a credible amount of coherence.”
Harry nudged him with an elbow. “I rocked,” he said with a wide grin. “Did you see the kids? They were really listening.”
“Potter, they are children, they were allowed to miss their regularly scheduled classes to listen to the Chosen One discuss a bloody, exciting war,” Severus drawled. “Of course, they listened, the blood-thirsty little monsters.”
Rolling his eyes in exasperation, Harry nudged him again, the young man often touched him in public, but thankfully it was casual touches, nothing intimate. “So, see you tonight?”
The boy still had a charming touch of insecurity, Severus had no doubt he would out-grow it in time, but for now it was reassuring. “Indeed. I will count the hours until I can have you to myself.”
Harry gave him a shy smile. “I like it when you say things like that.”
Severus was well aware of that, it was why he attempted such romantic nonsense, but he merely arched a brow in response.
Minerva arrived and dragged Harry away to answer more questions for the paper, but Severus knew the boy would be in his quarters directly after dinner. Making his way back to his classroom, Severus pondered the unexpected turn his life had taken. When he’d first acknowledged his attraction to Potter, he’d hoped for an affair of a few weeks at best, rejection at worst.
But never, not even where his deepest, darkest desires lay seething and restless, had he dared hope for more. He snorted softly to himself. Harry Potter often had a way of turning things on their head, and now he’d done it to Severus. Severus couldn’t bring himself to care, not with the prospect of having Harry Potter in his life.
He remembered what Harry had said to him that first night. ‘Trust is a good start.’ Severus decided the young man had the right of it. With a wicked smile that sent two third years running in the opposite direction, Severus suddenly had the perfect way to show Harry how much he trusted him. He could hardly wait until tonight.
%%%
Severus sent a note to Minerva asking to be excused from dinner that night; he had arranged with Sinistra to watch over the Slytherins. A quick shower and change of clothes and he was ready. He knew Harry would rush through dinner when he saw Severus was not there. The boy would be here any minute.
He had barely sat down when a knock sounded at the door. He made no move to answer it. The rapping was repeated louder, followed by a faint ‘Professor Snape?’ As he’d anticipated, it was Potter. The young man knocked once more and then predictably rattled the handle.
There was utter silence in the hallway when the knob turned under Harry’s hand. After a long moment the door eased open and Harry stuck his head cautiously around the door. “Severus,” he called hesitantly.
“In here,” Severus said casually.
Stepping into the sitting room, Harry looked around for him. He finally spotted him through the open bedroom door. Closing the portal behind him, Harry came into the bedroom with a baffled expression. “You didn’t set your wards?”
“The wards are up.”
“But the door opened for me…” Severus saw the moment Harry realized what he’d done.
“You added me to your wards,” the young man whispered in wonder. A brilliant smile light his face, his eyes were bright. “Thank you.”
Pleased Harry appreciated the significance of the gesture, Severus nodded in acknowledgement. “I thought it appropriate my lover have access.”
“Lover,” Harry repeated. “I like the sound of that.”
Severus quite liked the sound of it as well. “Why don’t you remove your clothing and come greet your lover properly,” he suggested.
Harry wasted no time in throwing off his clothes. While the younger man might have limited experience, Severus had seen little modesty in the boy. Likely a legacy of living in a dorm.
Climbing on the bed, Harry leaned over Severus’ reclining body and lowered his head for a kiss. Severus was happy to oblige him and kissed the young man thoroughly. When Harry lifted his head, his eyes were gratifyingly glazed.
“You have too many clothes on,” Harry said raggedly. The young man’s hands quickly pulled at the waist of Severus trousers, popping the button and skimming them down Severus’ hips. When they where past his knees, Severus helped by kicking them off.
Sitting back on his heels, Harry looked him over for a moment, and then gently ran his hands up Severus’ bare thighs. Delicate fingers carefully cupped Severus’ balls. Severus shuddered and spread his legs to allow Harry freer access.
Despite his relatively calm façade, Severus was nervous. He hoped Harry would recognize the meaning behind Severus’ intended gesture. It had been decades since he’d allowed another person such access, and in that case things had ended in death.
He knew he’d never have the words to tell Harry what he felt; he couldn’t even explain it to himself. He could only hope his actions spoke clearly enough for Harry to understand.
Unable to wait any longer, Severus rolled to his side, opened the drawer of his bedside table and removed a small vial of lubricant. Pulling the stopper, he quickly oiled his fingers.
When he breached the opening with the first finger, Harry gasped. The second provoked a shudder and a passionate kiss. The third, well it was only allowed to remain in place for a moment before Harry impatiently pushed them aside and grabbed the lube.
The hard, throbbing cock was quickly slicked and slowly Harry Potter eased his cock into Severus’ body. The young man hummed under his breath as he sank deeper. Severus tilted his hips to accommodate the girth.
When he was fully sheathed, Harry, his brow beaded with sweat, asked, “All right?”
“Perfect,” Severus whispered. And it was. When he had done this before he’d felt used, but with Harry it was perfect. A perfect melding, a sense of give and take that he’d never expected. “Perfect,” he repeated.
Severus wrapped his legs around Harry’s waist and his arms around his neck. Pulling the young man down for a kiss, Severus tightened his internal muscles and Harry thrust forward involuntarily. “Bastard,” the boy said with a chuckle.
“Always, now move.”
Harry started with long, slow thrusts, checking often to see if Severus was okay, but it didn’t take long for the sensations to get the best of him. Severus didn’t mind, the boy was a Gryffindor after all. Even lost in his own passion, Harry made sure the angle was pleasing for Severus. He considerately wrapped a hand around Severus’ cock and stroked. If the rhythm was a little off, the look of honest pleasure on Harry’s face more than made up for it.
He was so wrapped up in watching Harry; his orgasm caught him by surprise. Unable to control his response as he normally did, Severus nearly shouted with the pleasure. Harry’s hand gently stroked his softening cock milking the last pulses even as he thrust harder and harder.
An endless, joyous moment later, Harry came with a moan and Severus’ name on his lips. Panting into Severus’ mouth, the young man couldn’t seem to stop grinning. He swooped down for another kiss, and gently eased out of Severus hole.
Immediately snuggling close, Harry threw an arm over Severus’ chest. After a few minutes of peaceful quiet, Severus felt Harry smile against his chest. “You know,” Harry began with a hint of laughter in his voice. “After that you may never get rid of me.”
Severus’ arms reflexively tightened around Harry. He closed his eyes in relief, Harry had understood. Harry Potter seemed to understand a great deal about Severus. He never forced confessions Severus would be uncomfortable with, and he’d treated Severus with a respect that no one else ever had.
“I suppose I can resign myself to your presence,” Severus said still slightly out of breath.
Harry yawned widely and cuddled closer. “I promise to try to make you happy,” he vowed in a sleepy voice.
“You already do,” Severus whispered in response. “You already do.”