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snarrymod (snarrymod) wrote in snarry_games,
@ 2009-08-18 07:50:00

Entry tags:

Team Cauldron Entry (FIC): "Harry Potter and His Incredible, Dumb Luck!" By Eeyore9990
Title: Harry Potter and His Incredible, Dumb Luck!
Author: eeyore9990
Team: Cauldron, whoot!
Genre(s): Alive and Kicking (EWE)
Prompt(s): Seeking Knowledge, Go West
Rating/Warnings/Kinks: NC-17; Warnings: Highlight if you wish to know: *Bottom AND Top Snape, Forced Sex (not rape), EWE*
Word Count: ~11,700
Author Notes/Disclaimers/Betas Beta'd by Team Cauldron and Nomeci. Everyone rocks so hard. This fic was inspired by some world events as well as this study. Dedicated to ptyx whose birthday (several years ago) spawned my research on this bunny.

Summary: In which Harry proves himself a god… just not a sex god.

"Harry Potter and His Incredible, Dumb Luck!"

Don't forget to vote and review!

MOD NOTE: POLL IS NOW CLOSED. THANK YOU FOR PARTICIPATING IN THE SNARRY GAMES.

Mod note: If you rec this story, please link this POST, not the story url, or the author will not get her proper vote tally. Thank you!

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(Post a new comment)

ivylady
2009-08-19 03:45 am UTC (link)

Eey, I love you! This story is awesome and hilarious and I loved every bit of it. My favorite line was this one: "I promised in your first year of potions classes that I could teach you to brew fame, bottle glory... even put a stopper in death. Why, then, does it surprise everyone that I've use those skills for my own ends?" I've been wondering that myself ever since the end of book 7.

I love Harry's reaction and Snape's barbs when he discovers Snape laid out like the virgin sacrifice he is.

"I will suck your prick if I must, Potter." I died of laughter here.

Hee! I love the natives thinking that Harry's a god, that Harry came too soon during the ritual, and that Severus was better at sex than Harry. Dangling participles and gods aside, this was a fantastic fic. Yay, Team Cauldron!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:28 pm UTC

polpolaris
2009-08-19 06:06 am UTC (link)

You had Snape and Harry in a tent and you didn't utilise it!? I was having Brokeback flashes.

I love this, you get the humour just right. Very interesting take on 'uncontacted' groups; the mind magic with the touching of foreheads seemed quite authentic and real. Harry as a 'god' was just hilarious.

The ending was great too, with neither of them dealing with things until they absolutely had too (at least in Harry's mind). I particularly loved the use of 'all was well'. Always brings a smile to my face. Cheers for a great story!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:28 pm UTC

	pumpkin_pixi 2009-08-19 06:34 am UTC (link)
	OMG you OWNED this!! everything was perfect, the interaction between the two, the hot deflowering goodness and oh man the one liners were great, Loved it!! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:28 pm UTC

	lucianwolf 2009-08-19 07:18 am UTC (link)
	I've never read anything like this. I loved it. Thank you for the new environment. (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:29 pm UTC

	accio_kilt 2009-08-19 08:50 am UTC (link)
	Oh I so love it when you write a new story!!! The 'sacrificial sex scene' had me laughing aloud. This was brilliant!! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:29 pm UTC

	red_day_dawning 2009-08-19 10:40 am UTC (link)
	My mouth is currently hanging open in a most unappealing manner - this is the silliest, funniest, most hilariously brilliant crack I've read in ages. I think I spluttered and snorted throughout most of the story. Well done. (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:29 pm UTC

	szefi 2009-08-19 10:41 am UTC (link)
	This was very funny, and Harry is indeed a lucky guy! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:29 pm UTC

	jolalie14 2009-08-19 11:29 am UTC (link)
	Hee! Hilarious, especially their discussion on the altar. Love that Snape was so snarky and went into spy-mode when they encountered the Atlanteans. Enjoyed reading this very much! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:30 pm UTC

	eriador117 2009-08-19 11:43 am UTC (link)
	"You and your dangling... participles sort of blanked everything else out for me." - best line ever, LOL! Not really a fan of bottom!Snape, but the rest made up for it :) Hot and funny. take care, Annette (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:31 pm UTC

eriador117, 2009-08-19 07:31 pm UTC

	sweet_mercy 2009-08-19 02:16 pm UTC (link)
	That really was Harry Potter and His Incredible, Dumb Luck! Loved every second. Funny, serious, and fluffy all at once. Thank you! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:32 pm UTC

	sweetmelodykiss 2009-08-19 03:35 pm UTC (link)
	Got to love Harry's dumb luck. That was brilliant! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:32 pm UTC

	mimiheart 2009-08-19 04:32 pm UTC (link)
	:D I love it. Your Snape is absolutely perfect. And the whole expedition is great. All is definitely well. (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-19 04:33 pm UTC

	shiv5468 2009-08-19 06:05 pm UTC (link)
	Eeey darling, your Snape was perfect. Delightfully dry and sarcastic. And believable first time sex as well. (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:33 am UTC

shiv5468, 2009-08-23 08:16 am UTC

galad222000
2009-08-19 11:46 pm UTC (link)

This was a wonderful, funny, incredible story. Thanks so much for writing it. I loved so much throughout the story but my favorite was the ending when Snape said:

"You want to indulge in a sexual relationship with me based on one shared experience on a bloody uncomfortable rock in the middle of a hundred or so pervy bastards?"

Harry thought about this before nodding slowly. "Yeah, that about sums it up."

So very Snape and Harry! Thanks again!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:34 am UTC

	jin_fenghuang 2009-08-20 03:11 am UTC (link)
	That was awesome! I love how the Harry factor fucks shit up and then makes it alright in one go :P (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:34 am UTC

	chiastica 2009-08-20 05:19 am UTC (link)
	Ahahahaha, I LOVED the awkward sex! Harry is just so... he's just so eighteen, you know? That was fabulous. Thanks so much :D:D:D (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:34 am UTC

	sanityblurs 2009-08-20 11:12 am UTC (link)
	aww! awkward, but soo cute! <3 (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:35 am UTC

	ex_chrysos562 2009-08-20 04:57 pm UTC (link)
	This one made me smile so much! The 'sacrificial sex' was so funny and hot! I only wish the snakes had a bigger part, I love parseltongue. But that's just my personal kink. I loved the story! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:35 am UTC

	montana_dan 2009-08-20 06:10 pm UTC (link)
	This was so much fun. Harry's dumb luck indeed. The whole virgin sacrifice was adorable, with Harry's cluelessness and Snape's impatience. And of course the HEA. Excellent job, hun. Loved it. (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:35 am UTC

	gingertart50 2009-08-20 07:08 pm UTC (link)
	Excellent! A most hilarious twist on the ritual deflowering story! I really enjoyed this, thank you! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:35 am UTC

	undunoops 2009-08-20 10:25 pm UTC (link)
	How the hell did you come up with this bunny? Just completely unbelievable and deliciously hilarious! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:36 am UTC

leni_jess
2009-08-21 03:13 am UTC (link)

Loved the use of the old Boys' Own Adventure white-man-god-of-jungle-tribe trope – because

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Loved the use of the old Boys' Own Adventure white-man-god-of-jungle-tribe trope – because <i><this</i> dumb foreigner can speak to snakes! Also Harry rejecting virgin priestesses in favour of virgin Snape – and Snape's interpretation of virginity as being two-way.

"Dangling participles" – it's a wonder Harry's ever heard of them, but it's wonderful what one can recall under the pressure of sufficient embarrassment, no doubt. Also Harry's conviction that Snape's sarcasm can cut flesh.

The story was very funny, but still sweet, with Snape as snarky (mostly) as ever, but not nearly as hard to convince as he might have been, given Harry's supreme command of inarticulateness. Just as well Harry's lucky.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:37 am UTC

	lovesseamstress 2009-08-21 06:05 am UTC (link)
	I adore your snarky Snape. Kinda fun to read a fic where the sex wasn't mind-blowingly perfect from the get-go! I have a definite kink for virgin!Snape, and I loved Harry having to deflower him in front of the pervy natives. Very funny, and well done! (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:39 am UTC

	leela_cat 2009-08-21 03:46 pm UTC (link)
	'Dangling... participles' remains my candidate for one of the best uses of grammar ever. I love Snape's running commentary throughout and the utterly non-fireworks first time in front of all those people with poor Harry (and Severus) suffering from performance anxiety and premature ejaculation. Just brilliant. (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:39 am UTC

	magialuna 2009-08-21 11:58 pm UTC (link)
	I really enjoyed this! Very funny at parts, especially in the city. I really love my Potions Master snarky so thanks!!! This was very imaginative and filled the requirements of the prompt really well. Clare (Reply to this) (Thread)

eeyore9990, 2009-08-23 03:40 am UTC

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