Okay, I know you won't be notified of this response and maybe it's been so long that you've given up checking to see whether I've ever gotten around to thanking you for this comment. But on the off chance that you see this someday, I just want you to know that this was a huge gift to me. I have a hard time going back to old fics once I've posted them, because all I see are the flaws. It's just extraordinary to know that you were so intensely affected by the story, and everything you mentioned in your feedback is something that was important to me when I wrote this. Beauty and eroticism and catharsis and sacrifice and the surreal power of fairy tales were all swirling around in my head at the time, and I struggled like mad to channel them into a coherent story. I was obsessed with trying to show how emotionally entangled Snape and Harry were, regardless of whether or not it was healthy or whether love was ultimately, sadly, just another trap. I was still reeling from Snape's fate in Deathly Hallows, and I wanted to write a fic in which he was allowed to be free - of everybody, even Harry. Considering the weight of his history, the cost had to be high. And I wanted Harry to grow up, to be purged, to learn how complex love is. How it doesn't solve everything and how it comes at a price.
I'm glad you singled out the scene where Snape takes off his sweater. I slaved to get that right, because I could see it so clearly, and I yearned to find the most sensuous words. I wanted to invest Snape with a sublimated erotic presence, which is a kind of power in itself. And yes, I also wanted him to remain a mystery, because he's being viewed through Harry's eyes, and Harry isn't the most astute or sophisticated bloke, especially when it comes to Snape. I can't imagine that Snape would ever entirely trust him. Love him, yes, in that twisted, possessive, disillusioned way of his, but never open up.
Another nod to the desperation. This was a fic dealing with the aftermath of war and the unresolved damage done to so many, Harry and Snape included. It's also a fic exploring the magnetic charge between them, that propels them toward each other, snarling and striking out. Snape's struggled all his life to escape his past, and Harry, in this version, has to learn what it's like to be burdened with sin and guilt; I can't see him being able to forgive or let go under any other circumstances.
The ending's one of the things I think I got right. Oh, some of the phrasing could be better, but their parting does what I hoped it would do. I'm still secretly thrilled that I pulled it off, because it felt like such a balancing act. Thank you for the word "elegant." I was reaching for a particular blend of hope and loss, the taste of tragedy mixed with joy. Because, after all, Snape's vanishing into freedom. No matter how much it hurts, it's worth it, and I think Harry knows that.
Again, my apologies for not finding this sooner - both for my own sake, because it made me glow like a lamp, and because I really want to thank you for brightening my week. And one final note: you needn't worry about English not being your first language. Truly, your eloquence is astounding.