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savage_storm (savage_storm) wrote in snark_n_bark, @ 2008-09-05 17:52:00

The Breakfast Club
Characters: Regulus, Serenus, Tybalt, Etienne, Serafino, Sekhmet, Wooster
Summary: Regulus finds out that Savage-Snape family life is very different from what he's used to



Regulus was accustomed to quiet, leisurely mornings. He rarely set an alarm unless he had an early meeting with a supplier or a client, and he tried to avoid early meetings as much as possible; usually, he slept as late as he liked, woke with reluctance, stretched languidly, and ambled in search of breakfast for himself and Sekhmet. At the table, he read the newspaper and sipped his tea, easing himself into wakefulness and activity slowly. Everything was quiet, neat, and orderly, just the way he liked it.

Thus when he was awakened at six o'clock in the morning by the sound of small children shrieking and laughing, he was disoriented and startled, thinking for a moment that he was still dreaming. But he sat up in bed, rubbing his bleary eyes, and he could still hear the sounds that had roused him from slumber. Then he remembered. He wasn't in his quiet, neat flat; he was at Azoth House, and the sounds he heard were no doubt Etienne and Serafino.

Throwing back the covers, he shuffled to the bedroom door, opened it, and stuck his head out in time to see Serenus emerging from the nursery with one of the twins anchored on his hip. The little boy in question smiled widely and waved at Regulus, which let him identify the boy as Serafino, the one Serenus called "the cuddle-bug".

"Good morning!" Serenus called out cheerfully. "Did we wake you? Sorry about that. I should have warned you we're early risers around here. We won't be offended if you put up a sound-proofing charm on your room so you won't be woken up every morning, though."

"Thank you," Regulus mumbled, stifling a yawn with effort.

"Since you're already up, you might as well join us for breakfast," Serenus added as he headed to the stairs. "Just come on down when you're dressed."

Tybalt emerged from the nursery in Serenus' wake, holding Etienne cradled in his arms. "Serenus makes excellent waffles," he told Regulus, having overheard their exchange. "Do you take tea in the morning, or coffee?"

"Hungry!" Etienne said, turning in Tybalt's arms and tugging on his jumper. Then he turned again, facing Regulus, and offered a shy smile.

Surprised to see the usually somber half of the set smiling at him, Regulus couldn't help but smile back despite his half-asleep state. "Tea," he said in response to Tybalt's question. "And waffles sound like a good idea." He felt Sekhmet rubbing against his legs, and he glanced down at her. "I can let Sekhmet out to hunt. She will take care of herself quite well."

"There's a great deal to hunt around here," Tybalt said, smiling at Sekhmet. "Perhaps we should have Serenus transfigure a cat door for you, my lady, so that you can come and go as you please."

Etienne seemed to like Regulus' smile, and he suddenly held out his arms imperiously. "Want you carry me!" he said, in a tone that brooked no argument.

Regulus blinked, surprised anew by that announcement, and he hesitated for a moment; he didn't dislike small children, but he had little experience with them, and he didn't want to break the first one who actually seemed to like him.

"Is it safe?" he asked Tybalt uncertainly.

Tybalt was as surprised as Regulus seemed to be, but he was far too familiar with Snapean temperaments to argue with his son's sudden liking. He smiled reassuringly at Regulus, and held out Etienne toward him. "Absolutely safe, trust me. They're tougher than they look, especially at this age - in fact, you might find that you should be the one in fear for your life. When the two of them rough house, they take no prisoners and have no sense of boundaries!"

"Rough-house?" Regulus gave Tybalt a quizzical look as he reached out to take Etienne gingerly.

Inclining his head, Tybalt gave Regulus an inquisitive look. "You know, play around? Tackle, wrestle? The two of them are particularly fond of trying to get me flat on my back so they can tickle me."

"Ah." Regulus nodded his understanding, settling Etienne on his hip as he'd seen Serenus do. "Sirius and I didn't rough-house in that sense. Our rough-housing was vicious and short-lived. We were fighting to win, and our mother put a stop to it quickly. She preferred well-behaved children who didn't fling hexes at each other."

Tybalt snorted in disdain. "Well pardon me, but your mother was an idiot - and I say that with the utmost respect," he said, giving Regulus a broad wink. "Children need to play, and their parents should play with them. It's not just good for them, it's good for the adults, too - it means that we can pretend we never grew up."

"That was definitely not my parents' idea of child care," Regulus said dryly as he headed to the stairs. Etienne wrapped both arms around him, holding on tightly as they walked along. "They never played with us, and I was expected to adhere to their notion of what a mannerly child is meant to be. They wanted to mold me into the perfect pure-blood son since they had failed with Sirius."

"I feel bad for you, then," Tybalt said quietly as they descended the stairs. When they reached the bottom he reached out to ruffle Etienne's dark hair. "Children are meant to be free, to laugh and play and enjoy the perfect safety and innocence of childhood. My mother is even more of a free spirit than most, so I was a wild child, and I have very fond memories of her sitting in the dirt with me, conjuring water so that I could make mud pies. She taught me to dance in the rain and love without reservation, and I hope that I can give my children just as wonderful a childhood."

Regulus listened quietly, feeling a pang of envy; his own childhood memories were of strict rules and little affection. Certainly, his mother never would have let him make mud pies, much less danced in the rain with him. That was too undignified for a Black. He had learned to enjoy the finer things of life, but he had also learned to be neat and orderly and had developed an ingrained sense of decorum that stayed with him even now, decades later.

"I think you will," he said, smoothing one hand along Etienne's silky dark hair. "You have made a good start, at least. They seem quite happy."

"I believe they are - temper tantrums and imperious commands not withstanding," Tybalt chuckled. "You missed out before, but it's never too late, you realize. I suspect if you can unwind enough to romp with my boys, you'll find that you can relive your misspent youth."

"Perhaps," Regulus said neutrally as they entered the kitchen where the scent of tea, bacon, and waffles wafted to greet them. "Unwinding is not something I am familiar with. I am far more accustomed to a quiet, orderly lifestyle, not rough-housing."

"Well, you're in for a shock here, then," Serenus said, waving a wooden spoon in greeting. Smiling, he went to kiss Tybalt and the boys before returning to the stove. "We aren't quiet or orderly, not with two toddlers, a crup, and an overgrown Auror who thinks he's six years old," he added with a wink at Tybalt.

Tybalt stuck out his tongue at Serenus, then groped his arse for good measure as he moved to retrieve the kettle from the stove. "You might want to put Etienne in the seat beside you," he told Regulus, as he poured the steaming water into the tea pot Serenus had prepared, then carried it and the cups to the table. "He'll scream bloody murder if he's latched onto you and you try to get away from him."

He bent to kiss Serafino's head, then slid into the seat beside him. "Smells great," he said to Serenus, picking up his knife and fork to cut up Serafino's waffle. "You're a good cook, Regulus, but Serenus is a genius, especially with anything baked. It's a wonder that the boys and I don't weigh fifty stone."

Serenus turned off the heat on the stove and levitated plates of waffles, bacon, and eggs to the table, pausing to kiss and nuzzle Tybalt's cheek. "Thank you, caro," he said, smiling with pleasure at the compliment. "It's practice. I enjoy cooking," he added, glancing at Regulus as he explained.

Taking Tybalt's advice, Regulus settled Etienne in the high chair beside his place at the table and sat down, but before he could think of taking a sip of tea, Etienne looked pointedly at the waffle on his plate and then at Regulus.

"Cut!" Etienne demanded.

"What do we say?" Serenus gave him a stern look before Etienne could decide to say 'now' instead of what he was supposed to say.

"Please." Etienne turned wide baby blue eyes on Regulus, who stared back, non-plussed.

Tybalt returned the nuzzle with affection, watching Etienne out of the corner of his eye. "Oh, he does like you - he's resorting to unfair tactics," Tybalt laughed, amused by Etienne's adroit attempts at manipulation. Serafino was busily stuffing pieces of syrup coated waffle into his mouth, and Tybalt used the break in the action to gulp down a deep sip of his own tea. "Ah, caffeine. You'd better fortify yourself well, Regulus - it's non-stop around here until bedtime tonight."

"Really?" Regulus glanced at him in bewilderment. "What do you do? Don't they have lessons?" He couldn't imagine not having a regimented routine; his own childhood had been conducted on a strict schedule. He picked up his knife and fork and awkwardly began cutting up the waffle for Etienne, a first experience for him; he'd never had to attend to a child's food before, but Etienne was watching him raptly, and he found himself not wanting to disappoint the child.

"Some lessons, yes, but they're still young," Tybalt replied, cutting up his own waffle and reaching for a few slices of bacon. "At this age, you combine learning and play or you won't hold their interest for long. They love to help Serenus in the garden, too, don't they, love? If you can call what they do helping, that is."

"I help!" Serafino agreed cheerfully, pointing at his own chest. "You help too, Mis'er?"

"Regulus, Mister Regulus," Tybalt said, and Serafino's brow creased as he concentrated on the unfamiliar name.

"Weg'lus," he said slowly, then beamed in satisfaction.

"Very good." Serenus nodded, smiling with approval. For once, he was able to eat breakfast in peace since Tybalt and Regulus were on duty with the twins, and he munched a piece of bacon with extra pleasure for not being interrupted after every bite. "Yes, they do 'help' me in the garden, which consists of grubbing around in the mud and splashing water all over each other and me."

"How do you get anything done?" Regulus asked, shaking his head with confusion. By his side, Etienne was happily scarfing up bits of waffle, occupied for the moment.

"Nap time," Serenus replied with a grin. "Or we trade off. Tybalt watches them while I do other things and vice versa or I call in Ethelenda or Celestra as reinforcements. We have to work around them and their schedule, and if something doesn't get done..." He shrugged negligently. "Nothing is as important as being there for them. That's why we've added the nursery area at the shop. I want to be there while Gaius gets settled in, but I want the boys with me too rather than handing them over to babysitters for long hours several days a week, even if the babysitters are family."

"You know that saying about it takes a village to raise a child?" Tybalt asked. "It's pretty true, especially with twins. Fortunately they're really good children, just energetic and high spirited - we're just out numbered, two to two."

Regulus could scarcely wrap his mind around the concept of just not doing things and letting them go; everything Serenus and Tybalt were saying was completely foreign to his own experiences, and he could barely understand what it must be like to live that way. He supposed he was about to find out, though.

"I can't even imagine what it must be like," he said, shaking his head.

"And that's just with our two," Serenus said, his dark eyes dancing with mischief. "It's even more chaotic when Severus' brood is added to the mix."

"Especially with Cymbeline, the ringleader." Tybalt shivered dramatically. "You think it's bad with chaos? Think about how much more, um, interesting it is when there is an evil genius in charge of all their energies."

"Cymbleen!" Serafino nodded firmly. "She good girl! I wike her! Wike Lysanner an' Gaia, too!"

"I like Cymbeline, too," Regulus said, earning a beaming smile from Serafino, and then he glanced at Tybalt. "I can only imagine, however, what it is like when she is in charge. If she doesn't end up in Slytherin, I will be quite surprised."

"I don't think there's any question about that," Serenus said, chuckling. "If the hat tried to put her anywhere else, she would ignore it and take herself off to the Slytherin table anyway."

"And so might a certain cousin of hers," Tybalt added, inclining his head at Etienne. "Fortunately she adores him, so they've not butted heads too much yet, but I have a feelings it's only a matter of time. Irresistible force, immovable object - I just hope that I'm not caught in the middle when it happens!"

"I keep saying they will either end up hating each other or thick as thieves," Serenus said, leaning over to wipe Serafino's sticky hands with a conjured wet cloth. "I don't think there will be any grey area between them."

"I will join Tybalt in taking cover until it's sorted out," Regulus said.

Etienne stuffed the last piece of waffle into his mouth, and then he turned in his chair to face Regulus and held out his syrup covered hands. Regulus was at a loss until Serenus conjured a second wet cloth and tossed it to him.

"He wants you to clean him up," Serenus explained, amusement lacing his voice. "Considering we usually have to listen to him squawk and complain about washing up, I'm grateful he likes you enough to be cooperative."

"Yes, don't look a gift horse in the mouth!" Tybalt said, nodding sagely. "It's rare enough for them to want to be cleaned up, just go with it." He grinned. "And he doesn't bite, you know. Much."

Regulus raised his eyebrows at that, but he gamely accepted the cloth and wiped off Etienne's hands until all traces of the syrup were gone, and then he wiped Etienne's sticky face as well for good measure. "You aren't going to bite me, are you?" he asked somberly.

Etienne regarded him with equal sobriety in return, seeming to give the question serious consideration, and after a moment, he shook his head. "No bite," he said.

"I appreciate it," Regulus said, and Serenus chuckled as he pushed a cup of milk closer to Etienne, who picked it up and drank thirstily to wash down his waffles.

"Do you mind cutting up a piece of bacon for him as well?" Serenus asked innocently. "Since you're safe from being bitten and all."

"Certainly." Regulus had no idea how he had ended up being the manservant of a small child, but he obliged and cut up a small piece of bacon, depositing it on Etienne's plate. "Eggs too?" he asked, glancing at Serenus, who shook his head.

"We'll see how he feels after the bacon. He might be full."

"I full!" Serafino chimed in. "Up pwease, Daddy! Want horsey ride!"

"That's my cue," Tybalt said, glad to have managed to eat half a waffle and gulp down two cups of tea. He wiped his lips on his napkin and then stood, holding out his hands to Serafino, who took them and then scrambled up Tybalt's arms to his shoulders, placing one leg on either side of Tybalt's head.

"Gee'up," Serafino crowed, and Tybalt sighed before starting to bounce in place.

"I'm taking him out to the parlor, and we'll get started on some counting games," he said. "Take your time - I'll head into the office when the boys are occupied."

"We shouldn't be long," Serenus promised, eying the way Etienne was gobbling up his bacon, and he waved to Serafino, who waved back happily and yanked Tybalt's ponytail.

Regulus winced, feeling sympathy for Tybalt. "Long hair is fair game, I take it?"

"Definitely." Serenus pushed back his chair and began clearing away the dishes while Etienne finished his breakfast. "Either you develop a tough scalp or you're in constant pain."

"I see I have much to learn," Regulus said dryly, cleaning up Etienne's face and hands again now that the bacon was gone too.

"Up!" Etienne exclaimed, holding out his arms to his new friend.

"Go on, then." Serenus waved both hands at him in an encouraging gesture. "I'll clean up in here. You can just drop him off in the parlor with Tybalt. Once they're rolling around, you can sneak off to get dressed."

Nodding, Regulus stood and picked up the little boy once more, and Etienne immediately flung both arms around his neck and snuggled against him. It was overwhelming but oddly satisfying as well, and he found himself liking his new role more than he expected. It was odd to think less than an hour had passed since he had been unceremoniously awakened, and in some ways, he felt as if he'd already experienced half a day or longer. If this was the pace set every day, he had no idea how either Tybalt or Serenus were conscious by the end of it. He wasn't certain how long he would last, and he was just a helper.

He had survived his first breakfast intact, Regulus thought as he carried Etienne to the parlor to join his father and brother. Surely Regulus could survive the rest of the day as well.

Surely.

He hoped.