He didn't want to get back to the start, the start hadn't been what he wanted for them either. But somewhere there had been a middle, a really fantastic middle and even if that was just friends and trust. Well Steve wanted that. Nothing seemed quite right without it, not when together they were such good leaders. They needed to channel that now as best they could.
But under that was something personal, a place Steve kept firmly Locked Down. It was easier to just not consider it, there was no time, there was always something else he could focus on. It had always been that way, although when he'd been young it had had a lot more to do with being self conscious of how he'd looked. Now Steve worried about people liking what they saw too much.
That sounded like an order and Steve wasn't used to following them, but Tony was right. They should sleep, there would be time tomorrow to think through everything another hundred times. So he settled down, but didn't shut his eyes right away. Because looking at Tony's profile was nice, actually looking at Tony was always nice and in the darkness you could nearly get away with looking, like it covered all sins.
Besides the view was so much better than what Steve saw when he closed his eyes.