The tricky things about memories for Bucky, was that he could recall the moments, but it was harder for him to remember the physical aspect of everything. He could feel the emotions attached to the memories, and for the life he'd lived, they were pretty powerful emotions. Sometimes it was good, other times it was overwhelming. It was part of why he chose isolation so much, because on the overwhelming days it was sometimes all he could do to even move. Remembering her, remembering the way they were, everything they'd found with each other and everything they lost when they were ripped apart had been incredibly difficult. Those memories hit him hard. And her, having lived through it with her memories intact -- well, it stood to reason to him that she'd move on, that she'd leave it in the past and possibly want nothing to do with him. How was he supposed to bring that up to her in the brief interactions they had in Wakanda?
But they were most definitely talking about it now, and he was so grateful for it. Even though it was still hard; there was so much to say and process, Bucky could only feel grateful and he wished on every star he'd talked to her sooner, before Thanos. They needed this; they deserved this. To finally have that chance to embrace in the open, without fear of death or what he honestly believed had been worse than death when they'd been caught before. Even if they spoke now and never brought it up again, this moment meant the world to him.
"I'm grateful," he said, his voice heavy with emotion he was trying to keep together so he didn't fall to pieces on her -- like she needed to see that. Jesus. He didn't even like to let Steve see that and she was coming from a time when she'd been through far too much. For her, he needed to be strong, and he would. Even if she could hold her own, he needed her to know that no matter what happened, whatever happened after this embrace, he would be a pillar for her. He would be whatever she needed him to be. That was something he could do for her, something he wanted desperately to do for her.
"Having this, this time to tell you now, to feel this, you," Bucky felt like he was babbling but it was impossible not to. "Thank you." He wasn't even sure who he was thanking; her, or the powers that be that brought them both there. That fear was still there, that they'd be ripped apart if someone saw but he was able to quiet it because no, no one was going to hurt them. They might be shocked, but no one would do what was done to them in the past. And with that realization, he finally let himself relax and just be with her. It felt better than any memory.
But for as wonderful as this was, there was more he needed to know. Selfishly, he didn't want to know right now because he wanted to indulge in holding her and knowing it was okay for him to feel the way he did about everything. He couldn't be selfish with her, though; never with Natalia. She was too important. "I need you to tell me about those five years after the snap. I know I didn't make it. Steve told me, about what happens when Thanos arrives. But I need to know more. What you said -- about you. Natalia, you have to tell me."