remus john (![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} lonewolfen) wrote in ![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small} snapthread, |
There were still a myriad of excuses Remus could come up with to avoid The Thing, and he was sure Sirius could come up with plenty more too. Now his biggest worry, other than messing everything up and losing their friendship, was that he was being pushed by a desperate and devastating turn of events back home. He sure as hell didn't want that to influence Sirius either. That wasn't a reason to bring to light something that they'd been holding back for so long. It wasn't the right reason, but maybe it was still a valid one. To counter that, Remus could argue that really, it shouldn't matter what the reason was so long as the feelings were true and there. And bloody hell, they were. They'd always been there.
What they were doing now was falling back into old habits. They got just enough from each other to take the edge off of The Thing, but it never went away. It was a content place to be but it wasn't what it could be and Remus knew that. He was pretty sure Sirius knew it too. If they addressed it, if they acted on it, it wouldn't take away the pain of knowing what was going on back home for Remus or what was in store for Sirius should they ever get back there. But they also could see this place as an opportunity to finally get it right.
The toast Sirius chose had Remus' heart do that fluttering thing it always did whenever Sirius did something that made him feel special. He lifted his cup. Sirius was starting off bold, but then, Remus ought to have expected that. "To us," he repeated, and raised his cup, which most definitely was for tea, and clinked it to Sirius'. He held his best friend's gaze probably, definitely, a little longer than he should've before he brought his cup to his lips for a swig.