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snapelyhols_mod (snapelyhols_mod) wrote in snapelyholidays,
@ 2009-12-31 00:06:00

Entry tags:

2009_fic, disabled_sex, dub-con, fic4:kelly_chambliss, snape/mcgonagall, snape/moody, wanking

fic for kelly_chambliss 'In Memory of Sigmund Freud' (Snape/McGonagall, Snape/Moody)
kelly_chambliss_snapely09
Fic for: kelly_chambliss
Title: In Memory of Sigmund Freud
Author: atdelphi

Pairing: Snape/McGonagall, Snape/Moody
Rating: NC-17
Warnings/Kinks: highlight between brackets if you prefer story warnings:
[Mother and father issues, oblivious narrators, and 20th century poetry.
additional warning/kink note from the mods: dub-con & consensual sex, alcohol use & disabled sex]
Summary: Severus Snape spends his first summer holiday away from teaching cloistered at a remote house in strange company, not least his own.
Disclaimer: The world of Harry Potter and its characters belong to JK Rowling. The author of this fic has borrowed them for the purposes of storytelling. No profit was or will be made.
Word count: ~20,000
Author's note: Many thanks to my ever-patient beta readers. The title of this story is taken from that of a W.H. Auden poem; unnamed quotations herein are taken from Auden's A New Age and Roman Wall Blues respectively. Happy holidays, kelly_chambliss!

In Memory of Sigmund Freud

(note: link leads to author's website)

x-posted to LiveJournal & DreamWidth

(Post a new comment)

	gingertart50 2009-12-31 02:50 pm UTC (link)
	Oh wow! This is hard, gritty, poignant and utterly believable. I loved it - loved your damaged, wary, socially clumsy and insecure young Snape and Minerva was wonderful. Excellent fic! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:09 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you very much! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	centaury_squill 2009-12-31 03:08 pm UTC (link)
	Extremely well written and thought-provoking. All three of them are haunted by the past to some degree (literally, in Snape's case). I loved the Auden quotes. Philip Larkin's poem about parents came to my mind while reading this,too! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:10 pm UTC (link)
	Philip Larkin's poem about parents came to my mind while reading this, too! laughs Absolutely! Thank you very much - I'm glad you liked it. (Reply to this) (Parent)

perverse_idyll
2009-12-31 07:36 pm UTC (link)

This was - oh, this was brilliant, in a lucid, sly, stomach-kicking way. I have to leave for work now, but I'll come back later to make a stab at more detailed feedback. Let me just say that the ending tossed me between two poles. For a second, out of the blue, tears rose to my eyes, and then the last line made me laugh helplessly, ruefully, oh Severus you poor doomed awkward sneaky awful and endearing boy, and it was so perfect and all of a piece. I'll read this again tonight, for sheer hungry, heart-fraying pleasure - because it's too subtle and crafty to outright rend - and maybe by that point I'll be able to say something intelligent. God. I love this.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:16 pm UTC (link)
	blushes Thank you so much. 'Doomed' is such a good word for Severus here, because as much as I wanted him to leave as a better person at the end, we know from canon that there's only so far he can go. I'm really glad you enjoyed this, and thank you again for the kind comments. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	irena_candy 2010-01-01 12:13 am UTC (link)
	This is so beautifully written that I can only bow my head in admiration. Your depiction of such a tangled skein of relationships is incredibly deft and sensitive. Thank you for a wonderful piece of prose; I enjoyed it more than I can say. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:17 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much! (Reply to this) (Parent)

kelly_chambliss
2010-01-01 07:17 am UTC (link)

I probably shouldn't attempt to leave feedback when I'm still reeling from the gut-punching power of this brilliant story. The depth and complexity and sheer literary heft of this fic have left me practically boneless. Thank you, Mystery Author, for this pearl beyond price of a gift.

The story reads like the finest of whiskies -- smooth and smoky at the start, but then, with each sip, incredible layers are revealed, each with its own burn and bite and kick and heat, its danger and reward. I'm becoming incoherently lyrical, I know, but I feel like Emily Dickinson or something, tasting a liquor never brewed. . .

Anyway, I knew I was in for something special when I saw the Auden title and took in the promise inherent in the tone of your wonderful warnings and summary. (I was already pretty damned excited just to see the pairings and the rating and the length -- 20K of Snape/McG! with Moody! and sex!) And that opening promise is fulfilled over and over again.

I'm going to stop trying to craft a reasoned response and just list some of the things that moved and disturbed and delighted and unsettled and shook and impressed me:

--the precise, painful, funny way you render Severus's various social and financial anxieties; they ring so true.
--the humor and the IC dialogue (loved that "lure me out here" exchange, for instance)
--The effective way you set up and then develop the suicide motif. Lines like these -- ceasing his study of the sharpness of his knife and using it to dissect a Yorkshire pudding instead and deciding that falling would take almost as interminably long as drinking oneself to death -- just resonate on so many levels. I'm not sure if dying is an art, but your use of it is.
--the ocean/salt imagery, the unending rhythmic tide of sea and sex and death, bringing the eternal note of sadness in -- exquisitely done.
--the whole mixed-up, enthralling, frightening, tangled parental motif. Brilliant. "Mother and father issues," you say. My god; no kidding.
--the juxtaposition of Minerva's killing jars and skewered butterflies with the way she's got Severus formulated, sprawling on a pin. (Sorry for all my poetic allusions, but this story is a veritable poetry anthology -- it contains them all, one way or another. I can't help myself.)
--Snape's believable relationship with Moody, the sex and violence indistinguishable, the weaknesses and strengths indistinguishable, both of them old before their time yet still such painful boys ("give it back" / "make me"), both of them irrevocably maimed in their own ways, yet fighting on. (Like a Freudian textbook, all these relationships.)
--that beautifully-written paragraph about why Snape steals
--so many wonderful details and scenes (the library! the bookstore!); you create such a dense, full world.
--so many great, revealing lines (e.g.: smirked with a mixture of satisfaction and contempt that suggested he had just had the pleasure of killing Severus's dog)

Your depiction of these characters is so complex and multi-faceted; I'm awed. No sooner do I start to feel a bit warm-and-fuzzy about them than you complicate any straightforward response by peeling off another layer: saved!Severus becomes thief!Severus; understanding!Minerva becomes user!Minerva and thief!Minerva in her own right, taking things from Severus as surely as his mother takes his coins. Yet she is kind and giving, too. It's like Eileen's note -- "I love you. Give me money." Both are true at once. Snape is stolen from and coerced, by his mother and Minerva and Moody, and he steals and coerces in his turn. Yet they all, in their own ways, give freely (or as freely as any of us can, enmeshed as we are in our Freudian unconsciousnesses.)

Well, I'll stop for now, but like

perverse_idyll, I may have to return later and say more. There's too much here to take in at once.

In sum, dear Mystery Author, I am thrilled to bits. I asked for complex, grown-up characters and writing, and you provided them beyond my best imaginings. I've heard the mermaids singing! To me! In this story! When I talk about it -- and I will talk about it -- I will rave and flail like a mad raving, flailing thing, so fine a piece of work this is.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Thank You!

atdelphi
2010-01-10 10:07 pm UTC (link)

First off, I have to say I'm so thrilled that you enjoyed this story. I was, admittedly, really intimidated to write for you, both because you're such an excellent writer and because of your remarkably insightful reviews. I spent all month chewing my nails, waiting for this to be posted and convincing myself it was going to disappoint. (Also, I want to apologise - I would have done more to be anonymous had I known you had read "The Art and Science of Change." For some reason I was convinced you hadn't, and so I liberally borrowed some fanon from it.)

That this was a very oblique story only added to my nervousness. I know not everyone likes subjective stories that require puzzling out and guesswork, but I do and I hoped from your reviews that you might too. It started out a little more straight-forward, but I soon fell in love with writing a Severus who (while probably not the most sensitive to others' feelings to start with) is so wrapped up in his own headspace that he's incapable of ascribing much reality to anything, and is still young enough among the people who knew him as a youth to have a complete lack of conception that they are people just like him.

I'm also tickled pink that you liked Minerva here, since she's the character I most worried about getting 'wrong' and since we only see her shadows here. The motivation I was working with was that she's been here before. She was widowed young, and she had her life yanked out from under her, and she has had to grieve both a tangible loss and a loss of what might have been, and she has had to start all over again. She's been where Snape and Moody both are, and she knows that no amount of coddling or confrontation is going to help; that all she can do is offer them a safe place to get their acts together. She does think a summer affair might be something Severus would enjoy (certainly she doesn't think it would do him any harm) but mostly she instigates that because she promised herself a little selfish pleasure after all those years of sacrifice during the war.

In the early stages of writing this, I was thinking back to the scene in the first book of Minerva sitting alone on watch at the Dursleys', and the impression we slowly get over the series that while the 'civilian wizarding world was coming out of isolation and joining together to celebrate after the first defeat of Voldemort, the Order members were coming out of years of uncomfortably close conspiracy. I liked the idea of them all needing a little solitude and selfishness to remember who they are as individuals. Minerva, that she's still a sexual creature, an independent woman entitled to her own hobbies and privacy and boundaries, not just a teacher and deputy headmistress. Alastor, that he's still got enough fight in him to drag himself up now that he's hit rock bottom. And Severus...well, he certainly comes into his own here a little, but he doesn't let go of the summer the way they do, which I saw as part of his character; even in later canon, he's someone who's never entirely grown up, someone still chained to the place where he was a child, holding on to grudges and bad memories. I like to think, though, that between the end of this story and the time that Harry and Voldemort come back into his life, he gets to enjoy a few ghost-free years.

Finally, I want to thank you so much for your wonderful, blush-inducing comments. I was just gobsmacked by your response and so, so happy you liked it. This was definitely 'roll over and light a cigarette' feedback and was a holiday present all on its own. And most of all, thank you for making this request. This is definitely something I wouldn't have thought of on my own, but I had an absolute blast writing it.

Would you mind if I added you to my f-list?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: Thank You!

kelly_chambliss
2010-01-11 02:38 am UTC (link)

I'll start here -- Would you mind if I added you to my f-list? Please do! I was planning to ask you the same, since I'm eager to read everything you write, down to the last journal post /g/.

And thank you, not only for the wonderful story, but for providing your background thoughts about it; I love such glimpes into the writer-at-work. I'm taken with this notion in particular: I liked the idea of them all needing a little solitude and selfishness to remember who they are as individuals. I think it's at least partly because they're all being "selfish" that all three characters are so fully-realized (even if we're not inside the thoughts of MM and Moody). Their individuality comes through so clearly, both "now" (the summer of the story) and later: the seeds of the Harry-years characters germinate perfectly in this prequel to canon. That's another thing that makes this story so satisfying -- the fact that it provides such a rich narrative in its own right without violating (in fact, it helps explain) what each character becomes in canon.

Minerva, that she's still a sexual creature, an independent woman entitled to her own hobbies and privacy and boundaries, not just a teacher and deputy headmistress *sighs with happiness* -- Yes, this is just the Minerva I love to see in fanfic.

I liberally borrowed some fanon from it

Ha! I suspected you as the author, but I wasn't 100% certain until I reread "Art and Science" before reccing it to crack_broom and noticed the high-button shoes and Andrew's name. I loved those touches for the continuity and depth they provide.

(And I'm so glad you didn't feel spammed by all my commentary. I tend to get a little verbal when I'm excited /g/)

(Reply to this) (Parent)

kelly_chambliss
2010-01-01 05:56 pm UTC (link)

*back after reading again* This time, I'm struck even more by the parallels between Moody and Snape, both of them angry, bitter, paranoid, both of them accepting what Snape calls Minerva's "charity," which puts her in another light -- savior!Minerva, healing both men. In my first reading, I'd been struck by the opening sentence, wondering if, by the end, we would conclude that it had been a case of Minerva's "slyness" and not just a coincidental saving of Severus from suicide (however much he might not see it). And I like this interpretation more and more. She does take from Severus, but nothing he isn't willing to give (I don't think), and she gives back a great deal, too, as his gradual retreat from the shorelines and cliffs of suicide suggest. Her refusal throughout to comment or judge -- as Snape thinks, She was very good at not saying things. -- it's a way of giving both Snape and Moody the space and peace to heal themselves (to the extent that they can and however much she can't resist the occasional disapproving purse of the lips or "exasperated gaze.")

Minerva is IC and yet so wonderfully enigmatic in this story; I can't quite make her out, which I love -- I feel like Severus on that last train ride, looking at Minerva and having her not look back, not answer, and yet, her presence itself is an answer. Though she's not terribly "irascible" in this story, she reminds me of Potter's thoughts about her in OoP -- "solidly and dependably there."

And I love how the sex between her and Severus becomes more and more equal as he comes into his own (they start with her as his teacher yet again and end with that perfect give-and-take of mutual pleasure and manipulation behind closed curtains); their relationship is such a complex and interesting contrast to his sex/fights with Moody. (Speaking of whom, in this second reading, I was cut even more by his pain, that whole, huge, untold story behind one word -- "Gideon.")

I love the whole ghost story, too -- is she a real ghost? is she Snape's hopes and fears and past and subconscious made manifest, her cheap comb an emblem of his constant fear that the world will see through to his fundamental unworthiness and give him the "sack"? how much does her description of being dead influence his choice not to be? (That description, btw, is a piece of genius.) It's such a fascinating take on death: death not as the Big Sleep, but as the Eternal Waking -- but not waking to any heaven or hell beyond the ones you lived in life.

And I can just hear the two of them bickering; I laughed aloud at this exchange: "What did you die of?" "Oh, what does that matter? Murder. Suicide. Consumption. . .Don't worry - they washed the sheets." (And in the end, of course, what does it matter?) He does have the last word, and it's one for himself as well as for her -- yes, as he says, she's dead, but what I hear even more loudly are the words he doesn't say: she's dead and he's not, nor is he going to be (yet [*sniff*]).

Severus himself is such a triumph: awkward and suspicious and prickly and vulnerable and bright and self-serving and yet wanting to be accepted and considerate (in his unique Snapey way). What you've done with him epitomizes everything that compels me about this character. And of course, my love for your Minerva is just without bounds. (I adore, for instance, the way you sum up their fundmamental differences through your description of their prep for the new school year, Minerva with her calendars and schedules and satchels of books [and ha! the walking trunks]; Severus with his hilarious vague plan to repeat what he had done last year, only with less misery on his part and more on his students')

It's impossible for me to pick a favorite part of this story, but I have to give special place to that glorious scene in the library of (superbly-chosen) poetry and sex and Severus's final, mumbled "not you." Of course they have sex there and then: there's no aprhodisiac like poetry coupled with "the scent of paper and glue and vellum." This whole scene is a marvel, and I savored every word.

I'll stop (for now), but I can't promise that I won't be back.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	kelly_chambliss 2010-01-01 06:25 pm UTC (link)
	I should have said that Minerva is "solidly and dependably -- and a little frighteningly -- there" (which is a large part of her appeal to me; power is sexy [~~and I have a little thing for her high-buttoned shoes, too~~]) (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

kelly_chambliss
2010-01-02 05:28 pm UTC (link)

Hi, yeah, me again, ruminating this time on pov and how cleverly you use Snape's "obliviousness" to make an enigma of Minerva. Aside from wondering whether she expects him to pay and if she's going to throw him out on his ear, Severus doesn't really speculate about Minerva -- what she might want or need or why she might do what she does. She's still an "adult" to him; he seems to look at her the way a child does a grown-up (especially a child like Severus, who never had adults put his welfare/happiness first) -- as an inexplicable, often capricious being who wields her considerable power in either arbitrary or needy (like his mother) ways that he's given up trying to make sense of; adults just do what they do, and he'll respond when he needs to and otherwise will live within himself when he can. He scopes out Minerva's bedroom and photos not because he's interested in her, but because it gives him a power of his own.

His indifference becomes a bit chilling, of course, as we see with his response to finding her sobbing over the Prophet and his complete lack of curiosity about what might have happened to Andrew. But if we try to think of Minerva outside of the narrator's view, she seems less Eileen-user-like and comes across as a perceptive, generous, powerful, self-contained, butterfly-collecting (with all that that detail implies) woman who has opened her home to two damaged men, and herself to one of them, given them plenty of space, helped them save themselves (or at least not destroy themselves), and got some pleasure out of it herself in the process. No wonder she says she's had a "lovely holiday."

(Reply to this) (Parent)

therealsnape
2010-01-01 09:52 pm UTC (link)

What a truly wonderful story this was. Utterly, utterly brilliant. I don't know where to begin praising it, so I'll just give you some of my favourite lines.

she hadn't once made mention of the obvious fact that he had been her student, which put her miles ahead of the rest of the staff in the mental tally he was keeping. She did not correct his grammar, as Binns did. She did not eulogise his dead schoolmates in his presence, like a certain headmaster. This is so telling. The difficulties of that first year teaching – which is difficult enough in itself, as every teacher knows, even without the added strains he had to endure.

pretend he had in fact been the recipient of a social invitation before. How bleak. And so very Snape-ish. As are his financial worries, and the embarrassment over his clothes.

"Why, Severus. How thoughtful of you." Your Minerva is a delight from start to finish, and this line is so perfectly IC. As is To that end, I intend to occasionally subject you to conversation.

Severus thought he could hear the faint pounding of the surf beyond it, but it might have been the throb of an impending headache. The way you describe the landscape and mix it with Severus's moods is – again, sorry for being boringly repetitive – brilliant.

"And what would I want to look at you for? The whole interaction between Severus and the ghost is so eloquent – their bickering, and the way Severus accepts her: as an old friend almost. He would; he's been nearly dead in his mind already.

"Like you know you should be sleeping but you aren't."
He nodded as though that had been exactly what he suspected, and he put out the lamp, and he got into bed.

provided he doesn't curse a healer again." That detail is such vintage Moody – as is Minerva's unfussy determination to help him, nonetheless.

oranges, yes, and perhaps aniseed, and something more deeply herbal. I love the way your Snape, like the Potions Master he is, is always aware of the smells around him – and dissecting them, listing the certainties and possibilities of the ingredients.

The way their lovemaking proceeds, from student-teacher to equals. The comparison between Minerva and the sea. And the painful, needy path Snape and Moody take. That devastating 'Gideon'.

"I had a lovely holiday, Severus," she said, and then she opened her book. How enigmatic Minerva remains, right through the end. And the contents of Severus's satchel!

And what an excellent idea to have Minerva collect butterflies – more cruel a hobby than most authors would give her. But it fits so well with your version: someone who takes, as well as gives. Nothing remotely saintly about her, despite the help she gives both Moody and Snape, and the immense restraint she shows in not asking Snape about any of those bruises.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:21 pm UTC (link)
	blushes Thank you so much for your wonderfully kind comments. I haven't written a lot of Minerva before, only two stories really, and so it's a huge relief to see this go over well with fans who know her well. (Reply to this) (Parent)

myheartinhiding
2010-01-02 06:49 am UTC (link)

This story demands careful rereading: It's an elegantly tangled and perfectly dysfunctional incestuous knot of mutual manipulation, loneliness, and desperate yearning. "Oblivious narrator" as Severus is, in all his insular awkwardness and resentment, he manages to come away from this most inappropriate of "family" summer vacations feeling that, if he was used, he gave as good as he got.

More digging and contemplation is required. A wonderfully complex story with an achingly believable young Severus at its heart.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:22 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much. :-) (Reply to this) (Parent)

fanficforensics
2010-01-02 11:07 am UTC (link)

Powerful, intricate, a definite must re-read. Your young Snape just leaps off the page, he's so very complicated and very real, warts and all. Same for Moody: he's recognizably canon Moody, yet gains immense depth here with just a few hints towards his past with Gideon Prewett and the way it influences his treatment of Snape here. The way the characters interact is just fascinating and right. Absolutely top-notch work. Brava!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:22 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so very much! (Reply to this) (Parent)

joanwilder
2010-01-04 07:30 am UTC (link)

Oh, you got my heartstrings with that scene in the beginning, when Snape is remembering throwing the pebbles at the window, then contemplates jumping from the tower. I liked how he never really made a decision about that summer, but folded when she made it for him. You taught me a new word I love--lacustrine.

That first time with Minerva was so endearingly awkward; your description was so gentle and perfect that I held my breath, waiting for the disaster or humiliation that never arrived. My heart broke a little when Severus realized her words for him to wash up were the same as Mulciber's after his first killing. What a great contrast--in a phrase--of that life and the one he's trying to learn to live now.

From the cadence of his scrapping and fumbling with Moody, to the beautifully narrated scene where he's reading poetry to Minerva in the library, you pulled me on. It was then that I noticed the shrinking scroll bar at the side of the browser, and wailed. Not yet...

Poor Moody, burying his bottles, Snape watching from the window...implacable, but unable to look away, then wanting to go down and see the look on his face. I think Moody wasn't the only one to bury something that summer. Funny, how Severus was doing a little pas de deux with both of them; it didn't seem odd at all, and you put a lump in my throat when he and Moody shared that fag.

The house, Snape's little trip down to the shore in the dead of night; his ruminations on dying by drowning, dying by freezing, your final paragraph, where in his bag, Severus has the 'stones', the souvenirs of his holiday to remember it by. Honestly, I don't think I've read anything this fest season that's appealed to me as much as this has, and of course, it was the story, and your characters, but it was the writing mostly, I think. You remind me of a French writer, Alain Fournier, who wrote an enchanting book (Le Grand Meaulnes): the style, the dreamy ambiance, the way Snape reflected about things, the characters almost pitted against a 'forbidding' natural setting--it all seemed so familiar to me, and now I have to go dig out that book and read it again. And I'm really anxious to see who you are, and what else you might've written.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	joanwilder 2010-01-04 08:39 am UTC (link)
	I rec-ed you here. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	bk7brokemybrain 2010-01-05 06:01 am UTC (link)
	Thanks for the rec. It was quite an experience, this fic. I loved that word too - lacustrine. And I'd just heard 'riparian' on Keeping Up Appearances, lol. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	joanwilder 2010-01-05 07:24 am UTC (link)
	Wasn't it great? I rarely print fics, but I did this one. It's a hard-copy keeper! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:43 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much. You can't see it, but I'm blushing hard at the moment. I posted this very nervously and was certain that people would be hesitant to read this long a work with both these pairings. The response has been just amazing, and I'm so flattered that you recced it. :-) (Reply to this) (Parent)

bk7brokemybrain
2010-01-05 05:57 am UTC (link)

What an odd, beautiful, haunting story. These were two pairings that made me uncomfortable for many reasons, but you convinced me to invest in them, if not revel in them. I loved all the unanswered questions, the clues to who Minerva was before Hogwarts. I want to understand why the ghost would tell Snape that he wasn't supposed to be there, didn't belong there. I am willing to accept the unexplained as surreal and leave it at that.
You had me at 'self-murder' in the opening scene, and frequently tugged my heart with a turn of phrase or image. I especially will remember the ghost's description of what being dead feels like, and Snape's ideas on drowning.
Well done!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:31 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much! Admittedly, I was hoping it would be ambiguous to the reader whether that ghost really existed or if Snape were only imagining it, but I think I fell down on the job a little there. I'm glad you enjoyed it anyhow. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	bk7brokemybrain 2010-01-11 05:46 am UTC (link)
	I considered that the ghost might be Minerva's deceased daughter. What with the ring and photo Snape found, it seemed like she'd had another life which ended, then she moved on to Hogwarts. That's just me. I did enjoy it, whether the ghost was real or a figment of Snape's imagination. (Reply to this) (Parent)

torino10154
2010-01-06 01:16 pm UTC (link)

This is fucking brilliant. Every last word is perfect-rather Minerva-esque in fact: crisp, clean, stern. I loved the ghost haunting Severus, the way Minerva is taking care of Moody, Minerva's opening lines when she brings Severus to her rooms (rather a "what happens here, stays here"). The ugly, rough relationship Severus has with Moody (and you touched me deeply with the reference to the Prewetts). Marvelous work. Off to rec. :)

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	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:29 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	alisanne 2010-01-06 07:14 pm UTC (link)
	Wow. Gorgeously written story. Snape was perfect. Clumsy, inept, socially backwards, and totally himself. His interactions with Minerva and Moody were just what they should have been at this awkward stage of his life, complex, messy and exactly what he needed. And your last line was just... Yeah, fabulous job here. :) (Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-01-10 10:22 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you very much! (Reply to this) (Parent)

purplefluffycat
2010-01-12 12:35 am UTC (link)

Gosh, I'm not sure where to start with this. The story was masterfully crafted - the 'semi-oblivious narrator' device worked extremely well, and so many themes (Severus' parents, the sea, stealing 'souvenirs', suicide and life and death...) were cleverly embroidered onto the canvas of the broader story. I'm not sure I quite liked or disliked any of the characters in this; as I'm sure you intended, they remained ambiguous - each with their own strengths and weaknesses and patches of light and dark - and they leave the reader feeling vaguely uncomfortable and voyeuristic to the end. Intelligent and thought-provoking throughout - Brava! (although I confess - the sappy part of me does pine for a 'happy ending' ;-) )

PurpleFluffyCat x

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atdelphi
2010-01-14 02:57 pm UTC (link)

I will take "uncomfortable" as a compliment, since I think that was what I was going for. And you know, I really did want a happier ending, but I just kept thinking about the Snape we meet in the books, and the Snape/"Moody" interactions in GoF, and I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Though the second I finished it, I started working on an old AU that has a happy ending because even I can only manage so much bleakness. ;-)

Thank you so much for taking the time to read it, and I'm glad you...well, maybe "enjoyed" isn't the right word, but you know what I mean.

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tabbyrox
2010-03-02 09:47 am UTC (link)

LOVED this. One of the best HP fics I've ever read.
I really liked seeing Severus play with his control, over the urge to steal things and whatnot.
Maybe I've been reading too many mystery novels lately, but this story seemed to have a wonderful mystery style to it, and I quite loved it.
I also loved the peek at Minerva's past, and though I was disappointed that you didn't give away more than you did, I actually liked how you kept it back, as Severus himself probably wouldn't have been allowed much more information.

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	atdelphi 2010-03-04 05:27 am UTC (link)
	Thank you - I'm glad you enjoyed it. :-) (And I admittedly enjoyed writing a Snape who's just completely oblivious - and to a certain extent, uninterested - in the lives of others). (Reply to this) (Parent)

	ensnarryed 2010-10-26 07:08 am UTC (link)
	Besides. He supposed they would make Filch clean up the mess, and the pragmatic reality of that was not nearly as satisfying as the fantasy of Albus Dumbledore being forced to get his hands dirty for once. I have read up to this point. I am not sure I can feel anything b/c my heart feels like it is in a vice. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	atdelphi 2010-10-26 06:58 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, honey! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

ensnarryed
2010-11-01 11:58 am UTC (link)

This is perfect! I cannot say for sure what is so wonderful, b/c EVERYTHING seems to be!

I love the organization, the pace, the descriptions, the conversation, the Moody^^, McGonagall's indignation over Severus's glance at her trunks, Severus's *own* trunks - they have that in common - or perhaps Snape got it from her. Minerva did teach Snape before Snape even began teaching.

I only regret that Snape was only 22 (which means Harry was 2^^), and in no way able to partake in Snape's 'vacation.' I think I am trying to say that I miss t3h snarry, but this is so, so, so GREAT in everything else that....

Memory!

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	atdelphi 2010-11-01 02:01 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much! Alas, Snarry is unlikely to feature in anything I write, but I'm glad you enjoyed the other characters. g (Reply to this) (Parent)