Secret Snarry Swap: FIC: Before Sunrise Title: Before Sunrise Author:emeraldlove Other pairings/threesome: None Rating: General Word count: ~1300 Content/Warning(s): Non-magical AU. Prompter/Prompt: No. 31 from emeraldlove: Before Sunrise AU. Severus Snape meets a handsome stranger on the train. They spend a day together. Summary: Severus reflects on the memory of meeting Harry on the train. A/N: I had plans to fully write this AU, but life got in the way. Maybe one day I will. Until then please enjoy this little one-shot. Many thanks to Coconutice22 for helping me in turning this fic from a mess to a somewhat coherent story, and thanks to the mods for hosting Swap. Let's make the last Swap a great one. <3
It rained that day, and the weather did its job in souring his mood.
It was a chance meeting, really. A day and night spent together that Severus would reflect upon many times during sleepless nights and quiet moments, after another fight he had with Harry and him wondering if their relationship was worth it.
Severus would close his eyes and be taken back to their first meeting, a serendipitous occasion he needed after the trip back to his childhood residence. He'd received many half-hearted condolences there for a father he'd never cared for before scurrying back home.
It didn't help that he sat next to an obnoxious couple arguing, voices raised before transitioning to harsh whispering when they realised they were getting too loud. Abysmal to have a train ride ruined by an inconsiderate couple who'd rather air their personal problems in public.
Severus remembered closing his book and grabbing his bag before making his way down the train car and away from the arguing couple. He found an empty seat and sat down, glaring at the couple who'd made him move.
Then, a miraculous thing happened — soft laughter came from his right.
Severus glanced over and saw a young man staring at him from across the aisle. He must have seen Severus's trek and his obvious annoyance. Severus raised his eyebrows, daring the young man to say something. It only sparked more laughter, a light little thing that penetrated through the fog of misery he was in.
This was where Severus's life had taken a sharp right turn. Severus would then let the memory of meeting Harry unfold unhurriedly in his mind, back when he was still a stranger on a train.
The young man with the light laughter leaned over. Warmth radiated from him, even in the frigid cold air. He took the open invitation to start a conversation and asked, "What are you reading?"
Severus debated for a moment or two, wondering if he should ignore him. He was on a train heading into the city during a downpour. Even on days on which it wasn't raining, and he had only good news to share, conversations with strangers were never a pastime he indulged in. Severus preferred solitude. Socialising was exhausting.
However, the young man's expression was inviting. His body language and the way he voiced his question showed interest in what Severus was reading, and Severus craved for someone to take an interest in him — a need he didn't realise he yearned for before that day.
"The Memory Police," said the young man when he saw the title after Severus held up his book. "How do you like it?"
"It's an exploration of memories and forgetting," said Severus, not expecting the conversation to continue. Who wanted to converse with him? A dour man, getting on with his years. There were lines already on his face. He was not an object to be admired. His relatives were quick to get rid of him at his father's funeral. "As you forget objects, then your profession and body parts, when do you cease being you?"
"Cogito, ergo sum."
Severus opened his mouth, before closing it. No air was left in his lungs as he stared at the stranger. He did not expect that response, especially from a man that looked to be in his twenties, who seemed to enjoy the weather with his tanned skin and rough hands. "Something like that," Severus finally said, a bit of wonder in his tone as he took in the young man in a new light.
"Pride and Prejudice." The man held up his own tattered book. The spine was creased, and the pages were dogeared.
"Pedestrian," replied Severus, a remark he later regretted.
"A classic," said the man, eyes beaming with delight. Severus would marvel at Harry's eyes, always beaming and always amusing, as he drew Harry's profile in his sketchbook during the years they lost contact. "Don't discount Jane Austen."
"I can discount whomever I like," said Severus with a huff.
"Ah," said the man. His lips curled up into a smile. The pitter-patter of the rain against the windows provided a relaxing atmosphere to the intriguing conversation Severus found himself in. "You're one of those people."
"What do you mean 'one of those people'?" asked Severus, crossing his arms.
"A book snob."
Severus scoffed at being called names. "I am not a book snob."
"If I were to say that I was reading the Da Vinci Code, what would you have said?"
"I would've said nothing," said Severus.
"Really?"
"Yes, I would have kept my lips shut, gotten up, and left you and your horrid taste in books behind as I found another seat."
The man's laughter was lively, a pleasant contrast to the rainy day outside.
"Snob," chided the man.
"Fine, I'll permit you and only you the pleasure of calling me a book snob," said Severus, refusing to give the man a smile, even if he did give him a concession.
"As long as you admit to your failings," said the man. He tapped the book with his fingers. "And it's for a class, my book."
"Student?"
"I started uni a few months ago. Taking an Austen course with a friend of mine."
Severus nodded, his world realigned once again. Of course, a man like him wouldn't read for leisure.
No, Severus shouldn't think that. It was a rude thought, and the man conversing freely with him didn't deserve a rude thought.
"What do you normally read then?"
"Nothing. The papers, if there was a football match. What do you think of me now?" asked the man, honestly.
Severus's fingers clenched, and his heartbeats sped. The man's smile was wide and his teeth were dashingly white, so unlike Severus's yellowed ones. "I should've picked a different seat."
Once again, laughter filled the space between them. "Then we wouldn't have met."
"And my life would've been the better for it," said Severus, half-heartedly.
The man tilted his head to the side as he took Severus in, and Severus felt exposed, as if he was cut open on an operating table.
"Do you think so?" asked the man.
"No," admitted Severus after a moment. The word escaped from him before he could stop it.
The man leaned forward again and held out his hand. "I'm Harry, by the way."
"Severus."
In the constant replay of the memory, Severus marvelled at the chance encounter on the train. A couple airing out their grievances and Harry taking an interest in Severus's book.
They would spend the day together — away from their worries, their troubles, their lives. A magical day in which Severus would feel free. Severus, who was heading home after burying his good-for-nothing father. His heart closed off and his mind set on secluding himself from the world.
Their conversations would flow and stutter, moving from one nonsensical topic to another. Confessions would be uttered and secrets hidden.
Severus would try to suppress the bubbling affection he had for Harry, refusing to go down this path once again. Every time he followed the breadcrumbs men laid scattered for him to clumsily pick up, his heart got broken time and time again when the path inevitably ended. And it was so easy to fall for Harry.
Severus's fingers would ache so much from holding back and from pulling Harry close, choosing moments to grab Harry's hands and missing the moments to play with Harry's hair, a teenage desire he thought was long gone. He would steal glances at Harry, urging him to look at Severus and see his growing affections.
And then Harry would be gone.
They would part with only a promise on their lips and hope in their hearts. Severus would not see Harry till years later when he sought Severus out at Severus's book signing.
The day and night they spent together during that first meeting was like a fantasy, a dream even amongst dreams, so unlike the harsh reality of them together now.
Decades later, even after the fight that almost ended their relationship, Severus would hold Harry close and whisper against his skin and allude to that day with "I'm glad I got off the train with you."