Snarry-a-Thon18: BONUS FIC: Severus and Harry Enjoy Some Snarry Title: Severus and Harry Enjoy Some Snarry Author: Totally Anonymous Trelawney Other pairings/threesome: No threesomes, assorted pairings Rating: Mature Word count: ~4600 Content/Warning(s): crack, M/M slash, sexual innuendo, butt humor, mpreg, perhaps chan in your area, character death, angst, strong language Prompt: Severus Snape and Harry Potter enjoy the fruits of another Snarry-a-Thon. Their new Dicta-quill records their commentary. Summary: Harry Potter and Severus Snape are huge Snarry fans. Really, they are! Many a night has been spent recreating the more imaginative tales of lust. In the spirit of gratitude, they decide to document their reactions to Snarry-a-Thon 18 using a handy dandy Dicta-quill. Every piece is mentioned. So is a stalker. Enjoy! A/N: All of the Potterverse belongs to JKR, Warner Brothers, and Bloomsbury Publishing. The Thon pieces belong to their respective artists and writers. The ‘Thon moderators are goddesses, as are the betas and the Thon proofreader/editor. The author of this piece wishes to remain anonymous, but she is channeling the slim part of Trelawney that is not a fraud.
“So, Sev, Snarry-a-Thon 18 has come and gone, and there was a veritable cornucopia of creativity on display. What do you think of this year’s crop of Snarry goodness?”
“Cornucopia, Potter, have you been hitting the thesaurus again?”
“Shut it, git! The week three Thon list was just released, it’s time to reflect on this year’s offerings. We do this together every year.”
“Yes, my brat, but every other year, there hasn’t be a Dicta-quill just waiting to record my every utterance-”
“Aw, c’mon Sev, it’s not like we’re doing anything embarrassing, or graphic right now-”
“That can always be changed, Harry,” Severus purred.
“Later, my Sexy Serpent, it’s time to discuss the Thon. Let’s start with Week One.”
“If I must. Ahem. Week One. We’ll go in list order. Art First.”
“The first on the list is a lovely piece entitled ‘With this Ring.’ Your thoughts, Sev?”
“I have always been partial to pencil and paper, it seems to home the viewers’ attention in on the intimacy of the scene. And the honesty of expression - it’s not easy, capturing my expressions-”
“The artist did get your tender look just right-”
“Let’s not tell all my secrets, Potter, shall we proceed?”
“The next piece of art is entitled ‘The Last Memory’-”
“Harry, you’re not going in list order. ‘The Last Memory’ was first. Why did you not start with it?”
“I was distracted. You are one Sexy Serpent, Sev, and choosing those skin-tight dragon skin trousers, that was wicked. I just looked at my tablet and read the first thing I saw.”
“That is acceptable, my little Lion. Now, back to ‘The Last Memory’. The overhead view of you and me, it was exquisite. It was if the artist was actually there. The use of color was inspired - black and greys highlight the bleakness of impending demise, the red is used sparingly, but it is in stark contrast to the rest of the artist’s pallette. To me, it appears to illustrate the tenuous link to life I clung to in that moment. And the artist mentioned the cough. If I didn’t know this was a Muggle exhibition, I’d have to consider that a Magical person is our Anonymous Artist!”
“We go through this every year, Severus. There is NO SNARRY STALKER! How many times have the Aurors investigated, and found nothing? The albino ferret doesn’t count, he may be obsessed with you, but he never evolved from crude stick figure sketches. Let’s move on to the fics. The first fic on the list is ‘Surfacing.’”
“This work is a very realistic-feeling story of how the two of us could have navigated the immediate post-war Hogwarts. I found myself swept away by the tale. It really was masterful. How will the Snarry readers react, my dear Harry, when they find that YOU were the smoker, and it wasn’t tobacco. Molly isn’t just the Weasley matriarch, my brat!”
“You KNEW!”
“Medicinal marijuana is not just a Muggle therapy, Potter. Longbottom, Sprout, Pomfrey and I did a landmark study after the war, the Muggle Prime Minister was given the results. You weren’t reprimanded for your usage, it would have been hypocritical.”
“Next, please, Sev, before you start telling all of MY secrets! Besides, I stopped that herbal supplement when my supply of Hostess Twinkies was cruelly cut off-”
“You were developing a bit of a paunch, oh ‘Boy Who Worshipped Snack Cakes’, you had to be stopped!”
“Perhaps we should go back to your appraisals. The next fic is a spicy bit of fun called ‘Giving Detention’.
“Ah, yes. That was a quite a saucy romp in the prefects’ lavatory. First I insulted your teaching acumen in front of my snakes, and then you pinked my bum until I saw stars! Perhaps we could recreate that scenario in our quarters, later, but with your pert little arse over my lap-”
“A Dicta-quill is recording our every word, Sevvy Bear-”
“Snarry needs inspiration. I am providing it. Next fic, please.”
“Okay, next fic it is. What are your thoughts on ‘Worth Watching’?”
“I loved it. It was the natural sequel to ‘Esse Quam Videri’, by Torino. I could almost see the story unfold as a black and white movie from the 1950s. And the excitement of a lust-driven coupling while your mother was in the next room, I’ll admit it, my staff was fully raised by the end of that tale. This one needs to be re-enacted in the Room of Requirement!”
“Bring that dragon skin jacket of yours, and it’s a date! Now for the next tale, ‘Dear Sir’.”
“I always feel a bit left out in tales featuring your children born of Ginevra Weasley-”
“Sev, James Severus was carried by Ginny, Albus Sirius was carried by Luna Lovegood and then Luna Lilleen was carried by Hermione Granger, using both of our DNA. They are genetically YOURS. Why the insecurity?”
“First, the tale. I do love the use of Albus Severus in this story, as the wily matchmaker. He is as gifted as our Albus Sirius. And James Severus is very accurately portrayed, right down to the ‘why are they (you and Papa) fighting?”
“Forget to ward the door ONE TIME-”
“The time I had you bound to the bed?! That took some explaining, Potter, which was difficult to do when decked out in my Dungeon Master regalia. Thank heavens James was a resilient young boy-”
“You Obliviated him!”
“Needs must when I’m decked out in BDSM garb. You were in no position to assist me in damage control.”
“Back to the story, dear husband.”
“Miss Lovegood colluding with Albus and Lily to reel me into your life was brilliant. She is totally capable of such a ruse. It was a thoroughly entertaining read.”
“The insecurity, Severus? What. Is that about?”
“You are mine, Harry, all MINE, nobody else is allowed to have you, not even in the Land of Snarry!”
“The Thon is a Muggle celebration of our partnership, it would be very boring if there were no literary obstacles, or backstories, to complicate the path to ‘Happily Ever After’.”
“As long as you realize - YOU. ARE. MINE!”
“It’s hard to forget, when there is ‘Property of Severus Snape’ tattooed on my arse!”
“C’mon Sev, we have a few more lovely works to discuss. The next is ‘True Love, Tripled’. I know you have some thoughts on this, my own.”
“Male pregnancy is at least twenty years in the future, Harry. Collaboration between Muggle physicians and our healers in this field is still in its infancy.”
“Did you just make a joke?”
“I’m not sure. Did you find it humorous, Harry?”
“Back to the fic, Sev. What did you think of it?”
“IF spontaneous wizard pregnancy were possible, I suppose I would find the idea of three children due on the same date quite humorous.”
“A ringing endorsement if ever I heard one. The next fic on the Week One list is ‘Grim’. Sirius is the matchmaker here. I am sure you have a strong opinion about that.”
“Harry, Sirius’s path to redemption was actually a healing journey for me. I would like to think if your godfather did wish to make amends, he would choose this exact route. It puts Sirius in a much more sympathetic light.”
“That is awfully generous of you, dear. What would you like as a reward?”
“That thing you do with your tongue will be fine-”
“Dicta-quill!”
“Not a problem, ‘Boy Who Blushed’!”
“‘Lost in Cokeworth’ was quite a hot number. Your thoughts?”
“A very entertaining story with a truly epic fu-”
“Shush, you. It was epic, I grant you, but sometimes I don’t like others pondering your sexual, umm, talents.”
“So we both grapple with jealousy. Think of these writing events as fodder to spice up our physical relationship, as well an opportunity for growth.”
“Whatever, my Slytherin stud. And now, back to the list. ‘No One’s Master But Mine’. Sev?”
“Harry, if only a snake would adopt me as her wizard. She was quite the clever companion, and her loyalty was commendable. Think of all the vermin she could exterminate! And a house full of little snakelings would have been quite a challenge-”
“How does that differ from being head of Slytherin House?”
“Not at all.”
“Hm, I have no response to that. The last one on the Week One Roundup is-”
“‘Careful What You Wish For: Meeting the Addams’. Here we have a rich backstory for me and my beloved mother. Morticia Addams would have been the perfect rebirth for a woman who was never valued by the Princes, nor her husband. I would have thrived within the bosom of this family-”
“Daddy, Papa, we’re home!” shrieked three rambunctious children, shattering the soft timbre of their papa’s reverie.
“Speak of a loving family, and they shall appear,” the ethereal voice of Auntie Luna proclaimed.
“My beloved husband, let’s ditch the Dicta-quill for now and enjoy the rewards our personal Snarry story. Next week, we’ll approach the Week Two Roundup.”
“Dicta-quill OFF,” murmured Snape.
~~*~~
Week Two
“Severus, do you think the readers and Snarry authors know what we did with each other after we tucked in the children last night?”
“These are Snarry readers and writers we are discussing, my dear brat, they know full well how imaginative, and vigorous, our marital relations can become.”
“Did you hide the lion tamer garb, my own? I don’t want to explain the whip to the children.”
“Harry, the Dicta-quill is on, if we don’t get to the Week Two Snarry-a-Thon 18 Roundup, you are going to provide some truly salacious fodder for next year’s ‘Thon.”
“You sexy git, why didn’t you tell me the quill was live-”
“Can I help it if I find your crimson blushing enchanting?”
“Alrighty then, before I spontaneously combust, let’s go on to the Week Two Roundup. Again, we’ll start with the art.”
“Spontaneous combustion of just your clothing will suffice, but that can wait. Until the list is done. Then, INCENDIO!”
“Severus!”
“I did send the children off to the Burrow, with their mothers, for some ‘bonding time.’ It seems a shame not to utilize the time for some bonding of our own-”
“The list, Sev. Now! Please!”
“As you wish, my scarlet lion!”
“The first work of art is called ‘The Right Sigil’. Your thoughts?”
“We previously established that I am particularly fond of pencil and paper renditions of my person. The artist’s steampunk solutions to my neck injury and my inability to vocalize after Nagini rearranged my cervical anatomy were inspired. And ‘your’ spell work, melding magical medicine with technology, was beautiful.”
“No comment about the sigil being on the left, not the right?”
“Potter, you adorable idiot, ‘right’ also means correct, which your interpretation, sadly, is NOT.”
“Adorable idiot, that’s a new one, Sev.”
“I aim to be original.”
“The next entry is ‘Have I Been Here Before?’ Before you say anything, I must say, it is a touching tribute to Alan Rickman, who portrayed you MASTERFULLY.”
“He is sorely missed, my Harry. And this compelling use of music and snippets of the ‘Deathly Hallows, Part 2’, really illustrate the finality of death, even when we try to use our magic to thwart it.”
“You did, though. Thwart death, that is.”
“I was prepared, Harry. Antivenin and blood replenishers, I always carried them.”
“And I am so thankful that you did!”
“As am I. Shall we proceed to the next work?”
“That would be ‘Bad Memory’. Severus?”
“I really admire how the artist captured just how much concern and comfort can be provided with a simple touch. And my post-war anguish, it was right at the surface. An unspoken dialogue, captured in a single gesture.”
“I couldn’t have said that better.”
“Indeed. That’s why I am your literary assistance wizard-”
“Oi, you just insulted me-”
“And you love it.”
“I am a fully qualified Healer, I am intelligent in my own right-”
“You are fluent in Healer-speak. Adjectives confuse you. Don’t deny it.”
“Grrr.”
“I rest my case.”
“This isn’t over, but we have many fine fics to discuss, so let’s move on. The first is called ‘A Little Tenderness’, which is a continuation of a piece entitled ‘Diagonally’, by Lilian.”
“This tale is a brilliant continuation of Lilian’s work. It begins with the precious little witch, Maddie, and chronicles the changes she brings to the lives of our literary counterparts, as she weaves the three together into a cohesive family group.”
“I loved how ‘we’ were able to take away a glimmer of goodness and hope from the tragedy that is war.”
“Potter, you waxed poetic there-”
“Literary assistance wizard my arse-”
“And then you prove me right with my first assessment. Harry, kindly holster your wand - YIKES, HARRY, did you have to hex my arse?”
“Yes. The next tale is ‘The Taste of Treacle Tart’.”
“The make up sex had better be fantastic, Potter-”
“Severus, your literary comments are welcome here, your arse complaints are not.”
“Alright, Mr. Potter. ‘The Taste Of Treacle Tart’ is a very believable slice of life piece, illustrating the birthday of the fabled ‘Boy Who Lived’, juxtaposed with the reality of this Harry Potter’s work, friendship, and family life. The insanity of public adulation is nicely illustrated, and my role as your stabilizing foundation is particularly well written.”
“The treacle tart was a nice unifying theme. And I am sure every reader and writer in Snarry Land knows the identity of Doris Crockford!”
“Indeed. What is the next fic on the list?”
“That would be ‘When the Morning Comes’, which must be short for When the Morning Comes, ‘Cause We Didn’t Last Night.”
“A crass assessment, but you do speak truth. So much nakedness, so little sex, until the sun, and our libidos, arose. A delightful escapade.”
“The next piece is a very thoughtful piece entitled ‘Unlike The Other’.”
“I was quite taken with the Albus Severus in this story. Squib does not mean non-magical, it means inability to conjure the elements with magic. His ability in manipulating computer technology was magic in itself, and it was inspired. Squib is such a pejorative term; our daughter is an inspired dancer and painter at the tender age of four, but she seems to lack the ability to conjure. She is no less magical than her brothers!”
“Hush, my husband, I know you fear that she will be ostracized, but Hogwarts, Too, the new school, was formed specifically for children like our daughter. She will always be a part of our world!”
“Thank you, husband, I needed that reassurance. Please introduce the next work in the Roundup, while I compose myself.”
“Gladly, Sev. ‘Harry Potter and His Incredible Performing Jarvey’ is the next fic up for your appraisal.”
“Ah, yes, this is an amusing tale, filled with lust, infidelity, sex, and redheads having sex. Embarrassing sex in public. And later, there are babies. Announced by Bruno Mars, no less. Do you think the Muggles know he’s a wizard?”
“Severus, you flew through that one. You forgot the Jarveys. Why?”
“The less time we spend discussing it, the less likely the real Ginevra Weasley will be to hex our bollocks off-”
“Too true, that. So on to our next one, ‘The Forsaken One’. I’m going to discuss this piece, Sev. It was quite the eye-opener, seeing a pairing of us that involves my life essence that is not a prelude to a sexual relationship. It really opened my eyes to the possibility of being brotherly soulmates, although you are drop dead sexy, so not a life I would choose.”
“It is a bromance in the truest sense of the word, my Harry. A commendable twist of the soulmate trope. What have we next?”
“Next up is ‘At Last My Love Has Come Along’. What did you think of it, Severus?”
“Harry, even the presence of your godfather in this otherwise delightful dating farce did nothing to dampen my enthusiasm for this fictional chronicle of your counterpart’s dating disasters! And the AU setting, wherein no one died, was refreshing. I often wonder if we ever would have bonded, if Diggory had survived.”
“My type is tall, dark, and snarky; Cedric was only tall.”
“That is true. What is the next fic for my consideration, Harry?”
“That would be ‘White Shores’.”
“Harry, not many works move me to tears. This one did. You and I could easily have slipped into a quagmire of despair after the war, two survivors who had outlived our destinies-”
“Dumbledore was right, love saved us.”
“Indeed, it did, although in this work, it was Dumbledore’s love for us that lifted us to our own earthly paradise.”
“Not too different from this paradise we now call life.”
“You really are quite the poet today.”
“I am a man of many talents-”
“Clearly, humility is not one of them.”
“You will pay for your snark, Snarky McSnarkypants. The last item on the Week Two Roundup is ‘Daffodils’. I loved this one, Sev, what did you think of it?”
“This writer really captured who we were after the war. Both of us were emotionally wounded, as was illustrated, and my physical recovery was aptly described as well. And the full year of Friday visits, and their reason, was a poignant memorial to my mum. Thank Merlin the actual Ron Weasley is a far more accepting man.”
“That he is, Severus, that he is. That wraps up the Week Two Roundup. Accio whip!”
“WHAT? PUT THAT THING DOWN! DICTA-QUILL OFF!”
~~*~~
Week Three
“It’s always a little sad when a Snarry-a-Thon ends, isn’t it, Sev?”
“Hmpf”
“Are you still sulking over the whip incident? I didn’t land a single blow-”
“Didn’t land a single blow, he says.”
“Aw, c’mon, Sev, your hair doesn’t look that bad!”
“Doesn’t look that bad? Harry-”
“Candy floss pink is your color, dear!”
“You are extremely fortunate that Madame Pomfrey has me on bed rest for the compound ankle fracture I sustained trying to evade your frankly deplorable whip skills!”
“I really am sorry for that, my own! But you must admit, that figure eight your wand performed, while you were also airborne, was a thing of beauty. And you invented a new hair coloring spell!”
“A spell that has no counter, my dearest ‘dead meat as soon as the medical restraints come off’ husband of mine.”
“I love it when you get all murdery, my love, but enough pillow talk, Sev, it’s time for our Snarry-a-Thon Week Three Roundup review. We start, of course, with the art. We have a single piece this week, aptly named ‘StarWiz, the Movie’.”
“As you know, I usually enjoy a nice sketch of my impressive visage, as it, in itself, is striking, but this futuristic, boldly neon colored rendition of Future Snarry is actually a very accurate portrayal of our proper places, if we were called upon to save the galaxy.”
“What are you saying, Sev? I’ll give you that I am cute as a half-wizard, half cyborg pet, but what do you mean by ‘proper place’?”
“You are at my feet, groveling adoringly, while I have my back turned to you, facing the galactic unknown, with only my cunning, skill, rogue-ish good looks, and a seriously awesome laser Death Ray hand extension to defend the Light, and strike fear into idiot sidekicks. It is QUINTESSENTIALLY me.”
“Sev, do I need to find a safe house before you are unrestrained? You are seriously scaring me here. It was an accident, Severus-”
“I will have my revenge, my brat, you can count on that, but there are many ‘creative’ methods at my disposal, and it will take a while to select the perfect one, so, for now, you are safe.”
“I’m only safe because Poppy has your wand, you are stuck to the bed, and your magic is blocked to prevent accidental outbursts.”
“Brat, if the ‘outburst’ connects to your backside or its general environs, make no mistake, it would be no accident.”
“And with the hanging threat of retaliation in the air, we follow with the written works. Be nice, the participants put their hearts into their works. The first work is ‘Little Monkeys’-”
“This fiction neatly captures my innate fatherly instincts and my subtle use of my Slytherin wiles to achieve what I desire. I was very touched by your loyalty to ‘your’ wife’s sacrifice. Renaming the children according to their personalities and the icons they resembled was inspired. Your feelings of guilt were realistically illustrated, as were the children’s grief reactions. It did end with a sense of hope for the future-”
“An epic kiss, you gotta love that!”
“Grammar, Potter!”
“Persnickety old fart!”
“Persnickety: did Hermione teach you that word? And ‘old fart’? Your anal fixation is Freudian, my brat!
“Your anal fixation is why we exist, git!”
“Touché, Harry. You have just won your first verbal sparring match.”
“What’s my prize?”
“I WON’T hex your arse off and mount it over the fireplace.”
“Slytherin sadist. Does that mean you won’t retaliate when your magical control is returned?”
“It means that any retribution will not be physically or emotionally painful. It will be embarrassing, and highly entertaining, to anyone who isn’t you.”
“I’m shaking in my boots here. Not. Now, let’s continue with our commentary without further interruption. Next up, we have ‘Afloat (On a Sea Of Love)’. Your thoughts, my sexy immobilized Serpent?”
“Middle aged Snarry in Speedos, meddling Minerva, interfering relatives, and seafaring fun, what’s not to like? It was surprisingly close to our actual honeymoon!”
“No one rocks a Speedo like you, Sevvy Bear! Speedo, oh oh oh oh-”
“Flattery will get you everywhere, my Harry, but doesn’t this piece PROVE there is someone following us, hiding in the shadows?”
“THERE IS NO SNARRY STALKER!”
“How do you explain the Speedos, then? It is so out of character for my public persona, wearing such a revealing, neon colored swimming costume. Only you and I knew of their existence.”
“You and I, and a ship full of Muggles, saw those Speedos, oh most endowed one, it wasn’t a state secret. There was that night on the Lido deck, when you wore the banana hammock in the hot tub, that wasn’t mentioned. Don’t you think a stalker would mention something so, umm, monumental?”
“You just spilled the proverbial beans, my indiscreet little pet! Now. She. KNOWS!”
“MERLIN’S FURRY BALLS SEV, SEE A MIND HEALER-”
“Language, Potter! We’re dealing with a professional here! I will find her!”
“Whatever, my paranoid Prince! The next fic is ‘A Weekend Away’. I’ll take this one, dear, so you can collect yourself from whatever flight of fancy is currently possessing you.”
“Grrr.”
“I worry about you, Sev, which is the setting for this lovely tale of care and devotion. ‘Your’ excursion into a snowstorm, the worry when you were delayed, and your belated return after getting lost, reminded me of the endless days, sitting by your bedside, praying to any power that would listen for you to be spared from death.”
“Oh, my Harry, that was truly touching. I would add that ‘your’ physical effort to combat hypothermia was a beautiful analogy for your contributions to my physical recovery after Nagini. And I did present you with the Prince bonding ring after my full recovery, but anyone with eyes could have predicted that outcome!”
“Aw, Sev, that was sweet. The next in the Roundup is ‘The Wizengamot Club’.”
“Politics is a slippery, shady and often downright dangerous occupation, and this fic illustrates its complexity masterfully. Actively poisoning a family to eventually cause its extinction, that was diabolical. Making both of us Lords, with me as your mentor, guiding your through treacherous encounters, that was pure genius. And I certainly got you in the end, in all possible meanings of the phrase.”
“Now who has an anal fixation?”
“I never denied that, my Gryffindor pet! What is our next entry, Harry?”
“That would be ‘Saving Dudley Dursley’. What was your impression here, Sev?”
“Petunia Dursley is hardly a sympathetic character, Harry, so it was quite surprising, seeing her portrayed as a caring woman with fierce love for her son, as well as for her nephew. In a framework of an abusive marriage to an explosively dangerous man, her actions during your childhood appear rational.”
“Sev, you know she was abused, don’t you? And that Vernon was too much of a walrus to reach me in that closet under the stairs? By the time I was of age to understand that she feared he would beat her if she showed me any kindness, I forgave her. From then on, I did the chores to save all of our hides.”
“You are absolving her of her complicity?”
“She should have left him as soon as he first raised a hand against her, but that happened after my parents were killed. Her parents were dead. There was nowhere to go. She was afraid he would hurt us all.”
“She should have asked for help. A well-placed word to a teacher, a police officer, or a clergyman would have got you three the help you needed. Besides, she was the one who wielded the flying pan!”
“We’ll be here forever if we keep arguing this. The dynamics of abuse are complex and will not be solved here. This tale really pulled at my heartstrings; I hope this Dudley survived.”
“I’m sure he did, my Harry. Such a noble sacrifice has to succeed. What’s the next tale, Harry?”
“Next up is ‘Compatible Magic’ and, if you don’t mind, I’ll discuss it. This is my favorite trope, asking for your help with potion-assisted pregnancy while secretly saving myself for you. I really liked how you used all your cunning to reveal yourself as my perfect partner. And the sex was HOT!”
“Our bedroom athletics are the stuff of legend. If mpreg were possible, I’d have you barefoot and pregnant for a decade or more, I’m just that good!”
“Modesty. Learn its definition, hon. And now for the closing piece for Snarry-a-Thon 2018, a hilarious offering entitled ‘Potterzine’. Take it away, Sev!”
“‘Potterzine’ was a very imaginative tale about fan clubs and their illustrated fan fictions that were prevalent before the Internet age. The Hogwarts staff, the heroes of the war, were objectified in salacious stories with outrageously enhanced illustrations!”
“They got ‘little Severus’ right-”
“Shut it, shrimp!”
“And ‘we’ were about to enjoy a little cosplay at the end, so no harm done, right?”
“Any tale where I get to fixate with your posterior end is a worthwhile read.”
“And isn’t that what Snarry is all about? Celebrating the many ways that we come together, emotionally, spiritually, and physically!”
“And on that note, Harry, I declare our reflections on this year’s ‘Thon complete. Thank you to all of the artists and writers, for sharing their Snarry love. And a special thank you to the Snape Potter moderators, and all of the betas, and the Thon copy editor, for all of their pre- and post-publication effort!”
“Dicta-quill off!”
High up in the North Tower, Sybill Trelawney is peering through her crystal ball and cackling, watching Severus and Harry reviewing some Snarry. “They will never know that it is I who see their every move. This ball sees all!”