Challenge: Professor Lockhart
Word Count: 100
“We is doing this under orders, Master Professor!” cried the elf, and shoved a book into his hand. “Don't be angry!”
“What - “
The elf vanished with a puff of displaced air. Severus scarcely had time to realize that his shaving kit, tooth powder, shampoo, and soap had been replaced by patchouli-scented products adorned with Lockhart's personal monogram when the book cover formed itself into Lockhart's grinning face.
“Sorry to be so abrupt, but your vanity needed the upgrade. Enjoy the samples!” it burbled.
The scream of rage could be heard all the way in Gryffindor Tower.