Kane Owen (sellingsouls) wrote in shadows_rpg, @ 2023-12-11 19:21:00 |
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Entry tags: | #july 2018, adrian, adrian x kane, kane |
Who: Kane and Adrian, cameo by Aaron
When: evening, Saturday, July 21st -- wedding reception and after
Where: the marina, Kane’s place
Warning: turns NSFW (duh)
Status: complete, Part 1
Just like with the bachelor party, Kane made an effort to stay away from the wedding he knew was happening down at the marina. It was part of Adrian’s life he didn’t belong in, the public-facing part, with all the people he wanted to hide Kane from. He really tried to forget it was happening, to stay busy doing other shit, but his mind kept wandering back to how fucking good Adrian must look at that very moment. Was he having fun? How did his suit look on him? Were there other good looking guys in suits there? That shouldn’t make him jealous, and it didn’t, but it kind of did. Was Adrian thinking about him?
After he finished the random chore he’d been doing to try to distract himself, Kane checked the time on his phone. They were probably well into the reception. Maybe a couple of cocktails in, dancing the Funky Chicken or something. Kane told himself it had to be fucking lame and boring, and he definitely did not want to be there, nope. He would just run out to the store for a case of beer, cigarettes and some food ... and not go anywhere else. He put on some jeans and grabbed his keys, repeating that to himself.
Instead, Kane drove to the marina after he’d picked up his supplies. It couldn’t hurt to look, right? Adrian hadn’t been weird about him showing up to the strip club. It wasn’t like Kane was going to go in there and announce himself and out the man to his whole family. He just wanted a glimpse. To see if Adrian looked happy or wistful without him. To ogle him in a suit. Just to see him. Kane didn’t know where the sudden bout of insecurity was coming from, but it made his chest feel weird and his heart beat too fast and his mind race.
Getting in the building was easy, he just carried the bag of food like he was making a delivery, and nobody stopped him as he walked past the front desk. It wasn’t a huge place, so it wasn’t hard to find the ballroom with the ‘Lucas-Moretti Reception’ sign in front of it. It was noisy inside, the air crowded with music and laughter and voices. Kane stepped just inside the door and moved to the side, his eyes scanning the room quickly to spot his man. His man, even if nobody in the room knew it.
It had been an amazing day, Adrian had been worried that something would go wrong but it had all exceeded his expectations and now Aaron was officially his brother in law and Mila was positively glowing. Tired, but glowing. All that was missing was a date, he definitely felt the pressure, showing up alone, the older brother to the bride and all. He'd had a few people tell him he was a catch already and if he wasn't careful he might find himself on a blind date in the near future. He still had fun, even if he was alone and at his mother's insistence he danced with her a few times, brushing the metaphorical dust off his metaphorical dance shoes for the first time in a long while. It all came back easily, all the old dance lessons he'd taken as a kid paid off and it helped that his mother was a slow dancer and not too strict on the rules.
He wasn't thinking of Kane in that moment but he had been on and off all day. It was hard not to imagine what it would be like to be there with him, what it was going to be like when Mila knew about him, what Kane would be like to the people Adrian cared about. He'd only really seen him interacting with strangers except for the brief moment with Aaron that was all sorts of blurry in memory. Would his family like him? All homophobic shit aside, would he fit in? These thoughts kept creeping up on him and he imagined Kane in a suit, sitting at his table, smiling at the other guests in between stealing lovely glances at Adrian. It didn't fail to make his stomach ache and his chest feel weirdly hollow. It had never been meant to go this far.
Adrian was on the dance floor, not with a dashing man in a tux, but an older woman who Kane assumed to be his mom, or an aunt or something. As they turned on the dancefloor, he caught a glimpse of the woman’s bright smile -- yeah it was definitely his mom. Kane’s heart twisted weirdly in his chest with a mixed flood of emotions. His own mother was very slowly dying, she would never dance with him at a wedding. Especially not his own, for a dozen reasons that all hurt to think about. Adrian was smiling too, his eyes on his mom and not on Kane, no wistfulness in his expression. Which was ... good? Yes, he should be having fun at his sister’s wedding, and Kane didn’t know what he expected or even wanted. He shouldn’t have come. It was time to go.
He checked his phone and then shook his head and turned to walk out, but he couldn’t put a ton of effort into the ‘lost delivery guy’ pantomime. No one seemed to be paying attention to him anyway. Kane couldn’t help but glance back over his shoulder though, because Adrian did look fucking fantastic in his suit. A moment later he was striding toward the nearest exit, feeling a little queasy. He had no one but himself to blame.
Adrian got the feeling someone was watching him but he brushed it off easily, distracted when his dad showed up to take over the dancing. He twirled Maria one more time before giving Antonio her hand, grinning at the two of them as he turned to leave. Weddings were thirsty work but he wasn't drinking alcohol tonight, not yet anyway. He wanted to be present for the whole thing and didn't want to risk getting too drunk too fast so he opted for another glass of water and resting his butt at the bar. No longer busy, he thought of Kane again, imagined him there next to him, teasing him about the water, leaning against the bar, looking handsome as anything. God he wanted to see him in a suit just for the novelty of it. His own suit was good quality, nothing like the uncomfortable itchy stuff he'd had to wear to church as a kid. It was comfortable and well fitted and it made him feel pretty damn fine, if he said so himself. Kane probably couldn't keep his hands to himself if he was there so it was a good thing he wasn't.
Aaron was in heaven. The ceremony had gone off without a hitch and now he was married to the love of his life, who just so happened to be unrelentingly gorgeous and perfect. And now all his friends and family were gathered in one place, everybody enjoying the bar and dancing and each other, and it was all just blissful. He’d been working the room while Mila rested her feet at their table, chatting with little clusters of people. He was facing the doorway to the reception hall, bullshitting with a few of his buddies, when he saw a familiar face walk in and look around. Aaron kept an eye on the guy, recognizing him instantly even though he hadn’t exactly been clear-headed the other two times he’d seen him. He still wasn’t, a few drinks in him now. Aaron worried for a brief second that there was going to be some kind of scene, but Kane just stared at Adrian for a minute and then left again.
A few minutes later, Aaron broke off from that group to go to the bar to get a refill, sidling up next to Adrian. Aaron gave him a sly little grin as he set his empty glass down. “Guess who I just saw,” he said.
"Jesus," Adrian said deadpan, because he really had no idea. But Aaron was so happy tonight, he might as well have seen some divinity. Not right now though, his smile was more smug than that and Adrian gave him a curious look, arching a brow at him as he smiled back. Considering how much he'd been thinking about Kane, maybe it was weird he didn't instantly come to mind, but there was a divide between worlds there; Kane on one side and his family on the other. "Santa?" he added to his list of guesses and turned in his seat to face Aaron better.
Aaron snorted and chuckled, gesturing at the bartender to give him another round. He leaned his elbow on the bar and turned his full attention to Adrian again, still smirky. He couldn’t tell if Adrian was fucking with him or he really hadn’t seen Kane across the room, but it didn’t really matter, Aaron was going to rib him about it anyway. They were brothers now, and that was what brothers did. “Your boyfriend,” he said, side-nodding toward the main doorway. “Just a few minutes ago. You can tell him to come in for a drink, you know. He rescued Mila, we owe him that much.” It seemed like a reasonable suggestion to Aaron, they didn’t have to make out in front of anyone or anything.
Adrian's smile faded fast and he glanced toward the door before looking over his shoulder to see if anyone was close enough to overhear. The bartender didn't seem to have heard them and nobody else was hovering too close but Adrian still had that sinking feeling that felt almost claustrophobic. "Keep your voice down," he said first, urgent and quiet. "And that's not funny." Kane had no reason to be here and there was no way Adrian was calling him to come over, just one wrong look and everyone would know, there was no question about it. It felt like some quantum physics rule, that Kane couldn't be close to Adrian's people while Adrian was in the room too or the universe might implode.
He wasn’t drunk enough that he couldn’t control his volume, and Aaron knew it was a touchy subject ... but there was nobody else close enough to overhear them. Adrian’s reaction told him that he hadn’t known Kane was there, so that added a bit of weirdness to it. “Not bein’ funny,” Aaron told him mildly. Nothing could kill his good mood today, not even that constipated look on Adrian’s face. “I just saw him. You didn’t? He only stayed for a second though, guess you were busy dancin’.” Aaron didn’t tell him he really meant it about the drink, because he did, but he could understand why Adrian wouldn’t want to do that. The bartender set another rum and coke down and Aaron picked it up for a sip.
Knee-jerk reactions sucked and Adrian realized pretty quickly that a cool way to react to Aaron's words was just to laugh it off like any straight guy would. He tried to loosen up, giving Aaron an apologetic little smile and grabbing his glass of water. "Are you sure it was him?" he asked as he wondered if Kane had been looking for him and just not seen him, if he was still outside, if he'd come back in. Of course Aaron was sure, Adrian was pretty sure it was hard to mistake anyone for Kane and now he couldn't stop picturing him walking slowly through the reception like some sexy predator, eyes scanning the crowd. Maybe he was just here for work, though uber drivers didn't tend to come inside.
“Uh huh,” Aaron answered, trying not to grin like an idiot. Adrian was just kind of adorable when he was flustered, and it didn’t happen much around Aaron. “Jarhead haircut, big nose, big ears ... pretty sure it was him.” Was he a stalker? Was he waiting around for all this to be done so he could talk to Adrian? Aaron didn’t know and it wasn’t really his business, he was just relaying the information here. It was Adrian’s to handle. He thumped Adrian on the arm and turned to walk away. “M’gonna go hang out with my wife,” Aaron said, obviously relishing the word. It would distract her if Adrian wanted to slip out of the reception for a moment, but beyond that Aaron just wanted to bask in her presence some more.
The way Aaron said that made Adrian smile. Mila deserved to be loved this much and Aaron was a good man, it was all he could really wish for. His parents might have their doubts about him but Adrian had no doubts they'd come around and love him too. "Go hang out with your wife," he said because he was sure Aaron liked hearing the words as much as he seemed to enjoy saying them. "And sneak her out if she's getting tired, everyone will understand." Weddings were tiring and on top of all that, Mila was pregnant. Nobody would blame her for ducking out early. Adrian didn't want to leave just yet, he still had some people to talk to though it looked like his dancing duty was over; his parents looked quite content slow dancing and chatting on the dance floor.
Kane only lingered in the parking lot for a few minutes. He didn’t think Adrian had seen him, but part of him kind of expected him to come out anyway, like maybe he’d sensed Kane’s presence. That was stupid though, and he knew it. This whole thing had been stupid, and he was kind of pissed at himself for doing it. He fired up the SUV, feeling much more of an appetite now for all the beer he’d bought than the food. When was he going to learn to quit rubbing salt in his own wounds, reminding himself of all the shit he would never have, the life he would never live? He sped back to Castle View and cracked a beer open almost as soon as he was in the door. Kane grabbed as many more as he could carry between his fingers and went to the couch to flop and drink and try not to sulk.
Adrian had smothered the urge to text Kane to ask him where he was or what he was up to. He'd also smothered the urge to ask him if he'd actually come to the reception, but he couldn't stop thinking about him, wondering what he'd been doing there. Maybe he had a legit reason and had darted in, doing his best not to look for Adrian. Or maybe he'd been there to see Adrian, to catch a glimpse of the forbidden life or check if he was seeing someone else. It should have annoyed him, but it was honestly just a little hot and he chided himself for thinking that was even the reason. Like he was self important or cocky about it. Crazy about it. But he kind of knew they were both crazy.
When the party started winding down he said his goodbyes and headed out and even if it had been a while since Kane was allegedly there, he still found himself looking around for his car. Stupid. Back at Castle View he hesitated in the hallway and wondered if he should go to his own place first but... Hell no, he didn't want to so he knocked on Kane's door and then got his key out to let himself in when he heard Kane telling him to.
Kane sure felt crazy, in an entirely uncomfortable way. He knew he was wallowing, he knew how stupid and pointless it was, but he couldn’t seem to stop. Just like he couldn’t help that he crashed someone’s wedding reception to stalk his not-boyfriend. Not-public-boyfriend, anyway. Kane couldn’t hold it against him, he understood Adrian’s reasons, and it wasn’t like he was the kind of man anyone wanted to publicly date. Adrian’s family would want better for him, Kane was positive of that just from catching a glimpse of them. Just the way his mom smiled at him ... even if she accepted Adrian, she would never accept Kane.
All of that negativity was swirling around in his brain as he chugged down a few beers. Kane turned on the TV in an effort to distract himself, but ended up restlessly flipping through channels for the better part of an hour. He’d been expecting the knock, though not quite so soon. His heart leaping in his chest, he called for Adrian to come in, and pushed himself to sit up on the couch. Kane brushed his fingers through his hair, realizing with a bit of dismay that he had no idea what to expect.
Adrian locked the door behind him and slipped the key back in his pocket, giving Kane a little smile as he did so. God he had no right to be this good looking with his big ears and nose, as Aaron had put it so nicely, but he was and he currently looked like a kicked puppy. It gave Adrian mixed emotions, like he wanted to kick him some more, or make everything better. "Well, Lucas finally made an honest woman out of my sister," he said and made his way to the couch slowly. He knew he looked good in his suit and his confidence was bolstered by so many people telling him that. It just felt weird to feel smug and worried at the same time. "I missed you," he added as he stopped in front of the coffee table and it felt like a damn canyon between them, one littered with cans of beer.
He did look fucking amazing in that suit, and it made Kane’s heart skip a beat. It also made him wish that this was the first time he was seeing it. It should have been, he should’ve been waiting to see Adrian, tingling with anticipation and horny, instead of full of self-loathing and beer and only slightly horny. Because damn there was something hot about the way he sauntered in, and those suit pants fit him so well. Kane could only assume Adrian didn’t know about his earlier indiscretion, and he didn’t know yet if he wanted to keep it that way. “Missed you too,” he said, hands resting on his thighs. “Did you have a good time?” That was the most important thing, really, not Kane’s stupid spiral over seeing it.
"Yeah I did," Adrian replied and nudged the table with his knee to make a little space as he made his way around it. "Couldn't you tell?" he added as he stopped in front of Kane, running his fingers through his unruly hair and tracing them down to Kane's temple. There was no accusation in the words, just quiet amusement and maybe more of a question than just that one obvious in the words. He didn't let it linger without an explanation though. Kane looked kind of wrecked and a little drunk so he didn't really feel like torturing him with this. "Aaron saw you, or someone who looks a helluva lot like you. We both know there's nobody like you."
Regardless of Adrian’s tone, Kane’s stomach dropped, and horrified regret flashed through his eyes. “Fuck -- I’m sorry,” he said, his expression briefly twisting with emotion. Kane tried to rein it in, because it was fucking pathetic, but he’d fucked up and Adrian’s fingers were so soft on his face and he didn’t deserve it. “I didn’t mean for that to happen, I -- I wasn’t trying to fuck anything up for you --” His hands were practically cramping with the need to touch Adrian, but Kane fisted them in the denim covering his thighs instead. He knew logically that only Aaron knew who he actually was to Adrian, and if anybody else saw him standing there they probably didn’t think anything of it, but it still felt like he’d walked in with a huge neon sign that said everything Adrian didn’t want known.
Adrian felt a weird dissonance between how he felt and how he thought he should feel. He should be pissed off and he knew that if he had been the one to see Kane he probably would have panicked. That initial shock had been buffered by Aaron's good vibes instead and he'd had time to process the fact that nobody but Aaron had noticed Kane to the point where they needed to ask about him. Only a second there, Aaron had said, so it wasn't like he'd been standing there and staring blatantly, but he'd still been there for no fucking reason. Or one likely reason and Adrian couldn't confidently say he wouldn't have done the same thing in Kane's shoes. Even if he had been fuming when he got back, he was pretty sure he'd have run out of steam pretty fast with the way Kane was reacting. He looked almost afraid, like he really was a kicked puppy waiting for another taste of the boot. Adrian couldn't say it only elicited sympathy in him either, some dark part of him was enjoying it, wanting to keep Kane squirming.
"Did you get a good look?" he asked and he had to wonder what exactly Kane had been hoping for - or worried about. Was he there out of jealousy? Or did he actually wish he could have joined Adrian. Their relationship was strange and Adrian didn't think that was solely his fault for being closeted.
It was strange because they were strange, both of them a step away from the rest of humanity due to what they were ... but after what Kane had seen today, he felt miles further away from what made people human than Adrian was. Adrian still had a real loving family, a mother who smiled at him like he hung the moon, a sister who adored him, events to go to with people he loved. Kane could only lurk around the fringes of that, catching glimpses of all that light before he crawled back to this familiar dark hole. Adrian deserved all of it -- family and love and happiness, nothing that had happened to him had been his fault, he needed to hang onto that other side of life with both hands. Could he even do that with Kane around? Or was he dragging Adrian down further into the muck with him?
Kane didn’t know how to stop all of the terrible thoughts racing through his head. He didn’t want to be feeling this way, he wanted to be appreciating his man looking like a full meal in his suit, he wanted to forget all of this bullshit and just enjoy the connection he could get. He nodded to answer Adrian’s question, swallowing thickly as tears stung his eyes and nose. “You looked really happy,” he said haltingly, his voice unsteady. He gave Adrian a watery attempt at a smile and reached out to finger the edge of his suit jacket. “And ... so f-fucking good.”
"I was pretty happy," Adrian admitted and the thick emotion in Kane's voice was making his insides twist. "I missed you though. I missed... being able to have you there." The price was so high. It was exactly that way his mother had always looked at him that he was so afraid to lose. She'd been disappointed in him before in his life but never to the extent she would be if she knew he was gay. A nurse instead of a doctor? Disappointing and she'd nagged him for well over a year about considering med school instead. But she still loved him and supported him even when she was overbearing and disappointed and he was terrified of losing that. He wasn't even sure he could explain it to Kane - or if he wanted to. Some part of him said that Kane was worth paying that price, but mostly he thought he might regret it. Kane would leave him and he'd have burnt all those bridges for nothing. "I'm here now," he added quietly and slowly moved closer, straddling Kane and slowly sitting down on his lap.
He got a sweet throb in his core as Adrian climbed on top of him, heat rushing into his groin despite his emotional state. Adrian didn’t seem mad at him for showing up where he didn’t belong, and what he was saying sounded sincere in a way that made Kane want to cry even more. He ran his hands up Adrian’s chest, the jacket material soft and fine under his fingers, and cupped Adrian’s jaw with both hands. Kane pulled him in to bump their foreheads together and closed his eyes, sniffling a bit. “I don’t even know if I could ... if I’d be any good at bein’ there, you know?” he murmured. “I don’t -- m’not good at people. And you’re the best thing I got in my life, everything else is death and misery, and that don’t make for good dinner conversation.” He sniffed again and swallowed thickly, his jaw working for a second. “You deserve so much better, and I dunno if I got it in me.”
"Just 'cause I put on a brave face, doesn't mean I'm not cursed," Adrian murmured and he could well imagine how it all looked from the outside, a beautiful wedding with a happy family. He was pretty sure he'd been dancing when Kane stopped by and that was always a cheerful thing and sometimes even a healing one. "And even if I deserve better, you're all I want," he added honestly, trailing his fingers up and down Kane's cheeks in a gentle caress. Being good at being there was kind of funny to him, clearly Kane had been staring at him and not paying attention to the more awkward Lucas family present. Surely Kane couldn't be worse than Gavin Lucas who'd looked like he was there as a personal bodyguard and not the best man. "Would you even want to?" he asked and he wasn't sure what he wanted the answer to be. Yes, because it meant a lot to him. No, because it shouldn't happen.
Kane was learning in a very raw way what it was to really love someone else. If Adrian wasn’t cursed, if that bachelor party had never happened and his life had stayed on course, they wouldn’t have met. Adrian wouldn’t be straddling his lap and petting his face to comfort him, and as impossible as it felt to wish that away, Kane wanted better for him. It broke his heart that Adrian had suffered through so much shit he’d never asked for, and if he could’ve changed it all, he would have, to his own detriment. But he couldn’t, and Adrian was there, and the most selfish part of Kane was grateful. He scraped his teeth over his lip and nodded. “Yeah,” he said, but it was a complicated yes. “I just ... want you. Any piece you wanna give me. I’m not gonna try to force it though, I get it. It won’t happen again, I just had to see you, m’sorry.” He rubbed his thumb against the scar on Adrian’s temple.
Adrian had this crazy idea that maybe he could come out to everyone but his mother, just slowly reveal Kane to people he trusted until only Maria Moretti remained and then everyone would help him hide the truth from her for as long as he needed it hidden. Kane could be a 'good friend', the 'guy who saved Mila', Adrian's bestie - and still be part of the family, still join him for Sunday dinner or church or whatever else was going on. The thought of Kane in church was almost sacrilegious in a funny way and Adrian smiled faintly as he thought about it, even if it was laced with pain. God he wanted to give Kane anything he desired, including this. The cost was just so high and so terrifying. "Well," he said quietly. "I'm gonna tell Mila about you. So you can... you can be part of some of it. ... If she doesn't freak out." He bumped their foreheads together a bit and wondered if he was willing to lock himself out of all the things Kane wanted to be part of. Was that a risk he was willing to take? The question alone made him feel like he was being pulled in two directions, his chest aching.
He sniffed and nudged the bridge of their noses together with a soft “yeah?” Kane hadn’t known he’d made up his mind to do that, and it felt like a big step. He knew how important Mila was to Adrian, and siblings were often even harder to please than parents. Their bullshit detectors were more finely tuned. At least they had been in Kane’s limited experience, so that was a little nerve-wracking. He wasn’t good at charming anyone at all, but hopefully he’d already won some points with Mila. She at least didn’t and wouldn’t know their full history like Bailey did, so maybe Kane could build a better relationship with her than Adrian and his own sister could. “If it’s going badly -- telling her about you -- you don’t gotta tell her about me,” he murmured, moving his head to kiss Adrian’s forehead. “Nothing’s gotta change if you don’t want it to, you know. It just ... it just all hit me all wrong today. I’m here for this, whatever it is, I’m yours.” Kane paused and shifted a bit underneath Adrian, giving a little huff and a crooked smile. “Look, you got me all fuckin’ weepy and hard at the same time,” he muttered. “I’m a fuckin’ chump for you, where am I goin’?”
The permission made Adrian relax a little bit. He didn't need it but it felt good to have it nonetheless. He let out a soft chuckle at Kane's words and moved to press a gentle kiss on Kane's lips. "Weddings make people cry, you're just sappy," he said though he knew that wasn't it. He could feel Kane's emotions radiating off him - or maybe it was just his own echoing them, whatever it was felt good and bad at the same time, stronger than it had any right to be. This thing between them was like fire and lightning, insane cosmic powers that clashed and weaved together erratically and much like a natural disaster, he was powerless to stop any of it. "If I end up coming out for you and you leave me, you know I'll have to kill you, right?" he said quietly and he wanted it to be a joke but on some level he knew there was at least a fraction of truth to it.
That strangeness reared its head again -- a threat like that should have made Kane bristle, get defensive of his life, put Adrian in his place. Instead it made his stomach clench and his core tingle. He knew it was true and he knew that if Adrian wanted to make that happen, he could. Kane didn’t really know how much he would fight back either. He would deserve it. “I would expect nothin’ less,” he murmured, letting his hands slide down to grip Adrian’s upper thighs. “And if you’re fuckin’ with me, and you don’t mean any of this ...” Kane would make him suffer for it. He didn’t even know if killing Adrian was possible, but there were other ways to make someone pay, and Adrian would have to kill him to stop him. He left it unsaid, tugging a bit on the fabric of Adrian’s pants. “Don’t fuck with me,” he whispered.
"Wouldn't dream of it," Adrian whispered back and this was not healthy, this was not okay, but it made him feel so damn good that he didn't give a shit. Imagining Kane coming after him if he left, never leaving him alone again, not taking no for an answer - these were all things he would have thought of as terrible just a year ago but now? It was the only level of devotion acceptable to him. "Never fucking let me go," he murmured and kissed Kane again, not needing a verbal answer so much as he needed to kiss him now, taste that thick emotion, pull all of Kane's feelings into himself and give them back with his own in a steady circular rhythm.
A helpless sound vibrated in Kane’s throat, his heart squeeze-fluttering behind his ribs. His palms slid to Adrian’s hips and squeezed, pulling him in tighter as their tongues clashed together. It was such a relief not to hold back, to be raw and honest and not punished for it. Adrian was embracing him instead, understanding him in a way that he didn’t think anybody else in the world was capable of. He wasn’t going anywhere voluntarily, Adrian was going to have to force him to go away if he wanted to end this. Thankfully that wasn’t going to be tonight, in spite of Kane’s fuck up, and he tried to shut his mind up and just sink into kissing his man. Heat was already pooling in his belly, an emotional desperation fueling his desire.
So many things that were upsetting when they happened still somehow wormed their way into Adrian's mind as something sexy when the real threat was over. The cabin, hunting, Kane almost dying - and now this. He would have hated seeing Kane at the wedding, it would probably have sent him spiraling and this evening would have gone completely differently. But now? Now he looked back at sitting at a table and meeting Kane's gaze across the room and in the fantasy it was just hot. His own stalker, there to check on him - spy on him, dark eyes fixed on him and nobody else. It was fucking hot and Adrian deepened the kiss, tracing Kane's face and jaw before moving to the back of his neck and gently scratching at the nape of it. He had no idea what he wanted from Kane other than this, it was hard to imagine him participating in what Adrian now thought of as a false life, because most of the time with his parents he felt like he'd put on an uncomfortable mask that was far heavier than it had been before the Blackwater incident. He had so many layers to hide now, so much more horror, at times he didn't think he belonged there any more than Kane did.
Maybe the point wasn’t fitting in, but not feeling alone. Kane had fantasized about being open and out with Adrian more than was healthy, and he was pretty sure he would never quite fit in the Moretti family, but he didn’t think he would feel lonely with them, not with Adrian there ... and maybe he could give some of the same comfort. Maybe they were strange, but they’d be together, on the same wavelength. Mila had been through some crazy shit too, but Kane got the feeling only he knew everything Adrian had done and suffered. How could Kane not be obsessed with him? He’d never met anyone whose demons were so like his own. It shouldn’t have been a good thing, but it drew Kane in like gravity itself. A shiver running down his spine from Adrian’s blunt nails, he stroked his tongue against Adrian’s, vaguely wishing he didn’t taste like beer and cigarettes. Adrian didn’t seem to mind, though. Kane’s fingers moved to unbutton the fine jacket his man was still wearing, and he slipped his hands inside to touch him underneath. Part of him wanted to start ripping fabric and popping buttons, but he also didn’t want to rush through it, Adrian felt too good.
Adrian happened to like the taste of beer and cigarettes but he liked the way Kane touched him even more, leaning into it wantonly as they kissed. He couldn't keep his own hands off Kane, gently stroking his hair and face, wanting to be closer than was physically possible. That seemed like a recurring theme with them, always wanting more to the point of madness. "Aaron said you should come in for drinks," he murmured against Kane's lips. "As if I could just act normal around you." He could keep his hands off Kane in public but he knew the way he looked at him would always give him away. He had a feeling the chemistry between them was so tangible it could be felt by even the least empathetic people so there was no hiding what they were.
Adrian’s mouth made him feel twice as drunk as he really was, making his head swim with a flood of lust and emotion that he could never hold back, and his fingers dug into the thick muscle of his back to feel it move. What he said drew a snort out of Kane, and he grinned briefly. “Might as well announce it to the whole wedding,” he muttered in agreement. He would be able to behave -- for a while at least -- but he was sure it would be written all over their faces. Kane thought back to the party at the country club, sneaking to a back hallway with Brianna to fuck her up her dress, and he couldn’t help but put Adrian in her place, pants bunched around his thighs, taking Kane’s cock in the bathroom of the reception hall. It made him leak to fantasize about, and he rocked up into Adrian’s weight a bit. “I’d have to drag you away eventually, defile your sister’s wedding.” Kane grinned and nipped at Adrian’s bottom lip.
"Yeah, now was not the time," Adrian told him, playfully chiding. "No defiling my sister's wedding, please." It was too late now, thankfully, and he darted his tongue out to taste and tease Kane's lips. "You can defile this suit though," he added. "But if you wreck it you buy a new one." Or pay for the dry cleaning, or whatever needed to be done. Kane's clothes were easier to clean, just jeans and a t-shirt, but if they got hot and heavy without putting Adrian's suit aside first, it was going to cost one way or another. He had the stray thought of making it fun and doing a little strip tease or something but he just didn't want to get off Kane's lap for anything. Not yet.
“Sounds like you want me to wreck it,” Kane murmured. He started to tug the dress shirt out of the back of Adrian’s pants, then around his sides. Buying Adrian another suit was pocket change to Kane, he would buy him a whole fucking closet full if he got to rip every one of them off of him. Kane kissed him again, with a bit more force and hunger. He shoved his hands up the inside of Adrian’s shirt, eager to feel his bare skin. He dug his short nails into his skin, feeling the crazy urge to dig in harder and make him bleed and moan. Adrian drove him so fucking wild, he wanted to tear him open and crawl inside, and other impossible intimacies. Kane’s hands moved to grip the tails of Adrian’s shirt and jerked apart enough to pop the bottom couple of buttons off.
Adrian saw it coming but at the same time he didn't so he let out a low, startled gasp when the buttons popped. "That'll cost ya," he groaned against Kane's lips and the way Kane was handling him made him feel like he was on fire. It verged on painful, the way his fingers dug into his flesh, but at the same time it felt so damn good - so grounding - and Adrian wanted those hands on him everywhere. On some level he thought he should feel bad about not caring about the suit, with the ties to his family right there and how proud his mother had been of him, but he found it hard to care about anything right now when Kane's tongue pressed into his mouth and clashed against his own in ways that made his balls ache.
Adrian didn’t stop him, so Kane gave another tug to rip the rest of the buttons off. He dipped one hand under the shirt to grope Adrian’s chest while his free fingers slid up to start pulling at Adrian’s bowtie. He’d never actually tied one of them himself and had no idea how it was supposed to come loose, but he was going to get it undone. Kane nibbled on his tongue as he pinched and pulled at one nipple, a groan catching in his throat. He wanted to think that Adrian had thought about this moment while he’d been getting ready, anticipating letting Kane undo all the work he’d put into looking this good. He smelled amazing too, and Kane’s nostrils flared as he broke the kiss to drag his mouth down over Adrian’s jaw to kiss and bite at his neck.
Adrian let go of him to shimmy out of his jacket, getting restless and in need of more skin to skin contact. The suit felt good on him, but Kane always brought out a more primal part of him that wanted to be naked and practically glued against Kane so he was fine with losing the clothes even if they'd made him feel damn fine all evening. "I want this off," he moaned softly as the jacket fell somewhere behind him and his hands were free again to explore Kane's body. He fisted his hands in his t-shirt and tugged it upwards, knuckles brushing against Kane's skin, hot to the touch and begging to be touched more.
Kane leaned forward enough and lifted his arms so Adrian could peel his shirt off. He’d gotten the bowtie undone and he unbuttoned the final button around Adrian’s neck the normal way, licking his lips as he looked him over. All of the darkness and self-loathing he’d been basking in for hours seemed to have dissipated like a fucking magic trick. Kane knew it would always work that way, but the fact that it ever happened at all was amazing to him. All he had room for in his brain now was Adrian, touching and tasting and pleasing him, making him feel as hot as he looked. Kane pushed the shirt over Adrian’s shoulders as he leaned in to kiss and lick along his collar bone, his cock aching now in his jeans.
The only thing better than the way Kane was looking at him, was feeling his teeth and tongue on his skin and Adrian was soaking it all up, now freely stroking Kane's bare chest and all the familiar scars there. He knew this body so well now, he felt like he could draw it from memory if he had an ounce of artistic talent in his body. As it was he could almost remember the placement of all the scars and a few birthmarks as well and he could tell when his fingers came close to gracing one even if couldn't feel it and wasn't looking. God he loved this body, loved all of Kane for better or worse and all this pleasure was just a bonus.
Kane loved making him breathe like that, feeling the thump of his heart against his lips when his mouth dipped low enough. He ran his hands up and down Adrian’s bare sides, loving how the texture of his own scars broke up the smooth expanse of skin. It made Kane want to lick every inch of him. Difficult to do in their current position, but separating their bodies to relocate to the bedroom sounded like a giant hassle at the moment. He suck-kissed his way back up Adrian’s neck to get to his mouth again, a groan in his throat. “You should be in my bed,” he grumbled against Adrian’s lips, hands sliding down to squeeze his ass.
"Yeah, you would have loved that," Adrian murmured back. "If I'd ignored your sorry ass and made a beeline for the bedroom." Affectionate meanness seemed to be their love language at times and he smirked faintly as he spoke, then sealed his lips against Kane's and kissed him more hungrily. He thought of how he'd fucked Kane right here without much preparation and he wasn't so sure he could handle being on the receiving end of that, just another way Kane was tougher than him he supposed. Right now he just didn't want to get up, but he would need to anyway, there was still too much clothing in the way for them to fully enjoy each others' bodies. "Need me to drag you there now?" he asked after breathlessly breaking the kiss, rubbing his nose against Kane's as he pushed in closer against him, his hips restless.
“Nuh uh,” Kane answered breathlessly. He slid his hands under Adrian’s thighs and lurched forward a bit to scoot forward on the couch cushion. He didn’t need to be dragged anywhere, he could do the dragging just fine. With a deep grunt, Kane stood up with Adrian. If he’d had another couple of beers he probably wouldn’t have been able to manage it, but his balance was good enough. Adrian wasn’t a tiny guy, only a couple inches shorter than him, and he wasn’t light, but Kane was strong and he liked to show it when he got a chance. When Adrian wasn’t a hundred times stronger. He carried him toward the bedroom, enjoying how it felt to work his body hard, like it was a warmup for what was coming.
"Whoa," Adrian said in a soft warning but then Kane was lifting him anyway and he wrapped his arms around his neck and hooked his legs around his hips to hold on. "Okay," he murmured, amused and aroused in equal measures but mostly he was impressed. It wasn't the first time Kane carried him but he was a few beers in and had been pretty emotional just minutes ago so Adrian hadn't seen this coming. He didn't say anything beyond those two words, but he grinned faintly at Kane before moving in to nuzzle his cheek. He did not get carried often and never like this - unless it was Kane. There was something thrilling about it especially since he knew this wasn't like picking up some petite girl. Adrian was heavier than he looked, his muscles lean but strong and he did remember Kane bitching about it a few months back.
Adrian’s body had thickened up a bit since the first time Kane had seen him, no doubt the result of going back to his family and not being such a feral creature anymore. And maybe what the witch had done for him with the wendigo curse, relieving his constant starvation. He was still lean but it was a solid sort of lean, and while he wasn’t the easiest to carry, Kane managed without struggling in any embarrassing way. He loved the way it felt to be wrapped up in arms and legs and clung to so tightly. It made him feel kind of powerful and sexy to nudge his bedroom door open with one foot and carry Adrian inside, and Kane couldn’t help but think that Aaron was doing the same thing with Mila somewhere. He and Adrian were far from married, but there was something that resonated with the parallel. Kane put him down on the edge of the bed, sinking to his knees between Adrian’s thighs at the same time. He ran his now-free hands up those thighs and arched his neck to kiss him again.
Adrian leaned down to meet him, an appreciative and loving smile on his lips. He wanted Kane completely naked, even before he took off his pants and shirt, something about the power imbalance tickling him as well as how damn nice his own clothes were. Kane still looked more than sexy kneeling there in his jeans, denim clinging to his thick thighs, buttons begging to be popped. Adrian left that alone for now, cupping Kane's face as they kissed again before he trailed his hands down to his neck and from there down over his shoulders. He loved the breadth of them, the sharp angles, thick muscles, how well used his body always felt, strong and scarred. Right now it felt so powerful below him and Adrian was still reeling from being carried like it was no big deal.
Kane was a total sucker for how Adrian always touched him, like he was the sexiest thing Adrian had ever laid hands on. Kane wanted to think he was, that there were no other lovers he looked back on and missed, that he was the best Adrian had ever had. If it wasn’t true, he didn’t want to know. Kane relished touching him back, running his hands under Adrian’s shirt to caress his chest and sides. As he sucked briefly on Adrian’s tongue, he let his fingers trail down to hook into the front of his pants. Kane gave a little tug, a hum in his throat. He wanted to expose Adrian but not strip him all the way -- just enough that Kane could feel deliciously filthy sucking his cock. His earlier fantasy of fucking him in the restroom had shifted into something more like this, on his knees in worship instead. Kane’s thick fingers started working on the buttons.
Adrian reached down to settle his hand on Kane's, stopping him. "You first," he murmured against his lips. "Get naked for me." Once again he was caught in the contradicting feelings of wanting Kane to take him and serve him and it never ceased to amaze him how submissive and dominant feelings could coexist in the same damn moment. Going back and forth was one thing, this was something completely different. It was probably just the fact that he loved Kane no matter what he was doing, worshipful on his knees or looming over him with an aura of threatening - it was all delicious, all addictive all the time.
His stomach gave a pleasant somersault and a grin twitched at Kane’s lips. He liked how that sounded. He braced his hands against Adrian’s thighs and pushed himself to his feet. “I was gonna strip for you, you know,” he murmured, reaching up to stroke his fingers through Adrian’s hair with one hand while the other gave his own bulge a squeeze. “After the bachelor party, with music and everything. A real lapdance.” He hadn’t been able to stay away that night any better than he had today ... but even if he had, Adrian had called for him anyway. Kane moved one leg to catch Adrian’s knee between his thighs, his hands moving to the fly of his jeans to slowly start unbuttoning.
It was hard to decide where to look, Kane's face or the way he was squeezing himself and Adrian let his gaze roam quite freely, his breath catching in his throat. "Sounds like you owe me one," he murmured and at the moment he was pretty sure a strip tease done by this man might very well kill him. That dynamic of power shifted again, he could feel it, the anticipation and admiration that flooded him drowning out that bossy feeling for a moment. He wanted to lean in and lick Kane's stomach and hand, wanted to replace his hand with his own and get those jeans undone but at the same time watching was a sweet torture so he let his hands rest against Kane's thighs, forcing himself to be still.
Kane’s spine rolled in a slow wave, thick muscle flexing under Adrian’s hands as his hips pushed forward. If he could have turned some music on with just the snap of his fingers, he would have, but his phone was still in the living room and he wasn’t going to break the moment. “Maybe you’ll get it sometime,” Kane murmured as he pushed his zipper down. He slid his hands up his hips and hooked thumbs into the waistbands of his jeans and boxers. He started to ease them down with another swivel of his pelvis. The way Adrian was looking at him made his chest all tingly, encouraging that urge to preen and show off, even though he would’ve felt like an idiot with anybody else. Kane pushed his clothes down enough to let his cock spring free, and curled one hand around it to tease himself a bit.
The idea of a strip tease was a little cringy, or had been before this moment. There was nothing cringy about the way Kane was moving now and Adrian finally got what was so appealing about the whole thing. It sure as hell made a difference when it was someone he was actually attracted to. "Just maybe?" he asked, just barely able to keep his wits about him enough to banter but his heart wasn't really in it. He licked his lips as his light touch on Kane's thighs got firmer and soon he found himself gripping Kane hard, moving with him like he was part of it all, hypnotized by the sway of his hips. His gaze finally settled when Kane freed his cock and it was so tempting to lean forward and lick it, just a taste. No, not even that. He wanted to swallow it down, feel the weight of it on his tongue, make Kane moan. He let out a little groan as he resisted - for now - since this was a show and he was the captive audience until Kane decided otherwise.
He couldn’t very well do a real lap dance to no music, but there was nothing wrong with putting a little spice into taking off the rest of his clothes, right? As just a teaser of what Adrian missed out on the night of the bachelor party. He looked like he was enjoying it, so of course Kane was going to have to do it for real one night when he could set up for it, maybe just spring it on him as a random surprise. Anything to make him drool on himself as much as possible, because Kane was beyond hooked on that attention now, from this man. Kane stepped back enough to push his jeans down far enough to step out of them, leaving him nude just like Adrian had demanded. He kept that distance for a moment, watching his man’s expression while he lightly stroked his erection. “I’m naked for you,” he murmured. “What do you want next?”
There it was again, that rush of power from sitting there with his expensive pants on while Kane stood on display for him, naked and beautiful. He didn't look vulnerable though, if anything he radiated strength and Adrian couldn't stop staring at the way his fingers caressed his cock. He didn't even know what he wanted, he was feasting with his eyes for now and without Kane to touch, his hand strayed to his own crotch, lightly fondling the hard bulge within. These dress pants did very little to contain it and with his choice of underwear he could feel that touch far better than he could have through his regular jeans. He scooted forward in his seat a bit until he was nearly perched on the edge, reaching for Kane again. "How about you give me a taste of that," he murmured, nodding to Kane's cock before locking eyes with Kane again. "As is my right," he added almost playfully but God, he meant it. Kane was his. His.
Watching Adrian touch himself was just as hot from Kane’s end, and there was a lot of it to ogle at the moment. Those pants really did him all kinds of favors. Kane wasn’t usually very attracted to guys in suits, but apparently Adrian looked delicious in everything. Especially with his shirt unbuttoned and his zipper straining like that. The demand made Kane’s breath catch a little, even if it was kind of funny at the same time. It felt incredibly true though -- he belonged to Adrian, body and mind and everything else. Kane didn’t think there was anything he would deny him at this point, and he was free to taste as much of Kane’s cock as he wanted. He shuffled forward again and murmured, “Don’t gotta tell me twice.” He gripped the base of his cock and angled it toward Adrian’s mouth, his free hand moving to rest on his shoulder, thumb digging in a bit.
And just like that the power trip was laced with feelings of submission at Kane's grip. Adrian felt like he was on a rollercoaster, ups and downs with all the physical sensations to match. He tilted his head to bump it against Kane's arm before leaning in, his hands finding Kane's hips to pull him in even closer as he took him in his mouth. No teasing or playing coy - he took all of his cock, letting it slowly glide against his tongue until it hit his throat, his lips pressed tightly around it. He lingered there, rubbing his tongue against the underside before pulling back again, toying with that sweet spot right under the head, letting that rich salty flavor spread on his tongue as he enjoyed the feel of the ultra soft skin. He glanced up at Kane as he took him deeper again and it didn't really matter who was in charge or how often it changed tonight, his stomach was dropping pleasantly all the same and his cock was impossibly hard and neglected for now.
“Goddamn,” Kane exhaled as he watched Adrian’s mouth engulf him. Those plush lips of his were sinful already, seeing them wrapped around his cock always made Kane feel all melty inside. And the things he could do with that mouth, holy shit. Kane’s breathing was already getting thicker and heavier in his lungs, the slide of Adrian’s tongue against his most sensitive skin sending little shivers through his body. The power dynamics were all over the place tonight, he could feel it too, and he felt both dominant and not, in the moment -- gripping Adrian’s shoulder while he got his cock serviced so deliciously, but also totally at Adrian’s mercy and enthralled by him. He could’ve just as easily told Kane to get on his knees and do the sucking, and he would’ve done it without a second thought. He let go of his dick to card his fingers through Adrian’s hair, gripping the strands briefly as his tongue hit a particularly good spot.
Adrian fucking loved doing this and it was still hard to believe that he'd been reluctant to try this at all before Kane. Hell he'd been on the fence about it for a while even after but it came so naturally, he couldn't deny it had quickly become one of his favorite things to do. If it was even possible to have a favorite, everything with Kane blew his mind in the best way. He indulged himself as much as Kane with this, taking his time in exploring the shape and texture of his cock, swallowing down the precum pooling on his tongue as his hands moved to Kane's back to squeeze and knead his ass. It hit him at random how crazy it was that Kane was his, that he could touch him so freely, lick and swallow him down as much as he wanted. Even neglecting his own cock for now felt good in a way, giving him a restless feeling of anticipation and excitement as he focused on every little sign that Kane was enjoying himself.
The signs were abundant, little and big, because it all felt so goddamn good and making out on the couch had already gotten Kane’s engines going. His breathing was getting shakier by the minute, and Kane was moaning with almost every exhale, his fingers flexing in Adrian’s hair as he stroked him encouragingly. He couldn’t keep completely still through all of that pleasure, but he didn’t thrust deep or forcefully, just rocked his body a little to get even more of that friction from Adrian’s lips and tongue. It was maybe kind of crazy how quickly he could go from being so depressed and emotional to halfway out of his mind with lust, but that was just what Adrian did to him. They made each other crazy in a lot of ways, most of which he felt completely addicted to. “Fuck ... baby, you make me feel so good,” he moaned down to his man, his hand slipping down to squeeze the back of Adrian’s neck. Kane meant it in more ways than just Adrian’s mouth on his cock, too -- he’d completely changed Kane’s life for the better, in spite of how they’d started.
The mood had shifted deliciously and on some level Adrian had to wonder if he could always bring Kane out of a funk with sex. It was a nice idea at least, something to keep tucked behind his ear for the future. He was happy to keep doing what he was doing for a while but eventually he caved to his own desires and let go of Kane's hip to reach for his own cock, thumbing it through the soft fabric before opening the fly. Losing the slight pressure of the fabric was a relief but at the same time it seemed to open the floodgates of his own arousal to the point of desperation. He stroked himself as he slowly sucked on Kane's cock but it was getting harder to concentrate on not taking Kane too close to the edge and he vaguely remembered that Kane didn't much like to keep going after he came. That made him reluctantly pull back, mouthing Kane's balls gently for a couple of seconds before pushing back against his hand to lean back on one arm. He stared up at him with hungry eyes, his lips wet and his hand slowly fisting his cock, a challenge in his posture.