Who: Adrian and Kane Where: Castle View When: Sunday Morning, 7/15 Warning: NSFW in spots Status: complete, Part 1
When Adrian woke up on Sunday morning, he was surprised to find that Kane was still in bed with him and his head wasn't pounding in pain. He felt pretty good, actually, a little groggy but with no horrid hangover to speak of. It was a nice surprise at least, those were always welcome. The night before was a bit of a blur as he was still trying to wake up, but he did remember Kane picking him up and then pounding him into the mattress. If he hadn't remembered, he could at least still feel it, his body pleasantly sore and sated. He was thirsty though, that was about the only ailment he really felt, so he was happy to see there was a bottle of water on the nightstand next to him. Reaching for it, he also realized he was pretty clean all things considered and that he had definitely not cleaned himself up before passing out unless he had completely blacked out after the sex and still kept going. It made something inside him feel soft and warm as he glanced back at Kane, pausing before he moved gingerly to sit up just enough to drink.
Kane slept pretty solidly whenever Adrian stayed the night, there was something soothing about the feel of another warm body next to his, another heartbeat in the room. It might have just been some deep safety-in-numbers instinct, but it felt like a deeper peace than that. He still wasn’t completely used to sharing a bed though, and it didn’t take his subconscious long to sense that Adrian was awake. Kane rolled in toward Adrian as he gradually woke up, and draped one arm over him. He hummed softly as he nuzzled his face against Adrian’s arm, not in any rush to be fully conscious. If it was morning, Adrian would have to leave soon, and Kane didn’t want to let him, he just wanted to cling and snooze and stay in that warm haze.
It felt so damn good, having someone hold him like that and Adrian smiled before drinking at least a glass worth from the bottle, the room temperature water just what he needed to quench his thirst without jolting himself out of his comfort. He put the bottle away and scooted gently back in place before turning enough to settle his hand on Kane's flank. "Morning," he whispered, just in case Kane really wasn't awake yet. He didn't want to bring him to consciousness if he was still dozing, more than content to lie there as long as his body would let him before he had to eventually take care of its other needs. He wasn't even sure what time it was, but he had a nice surprise for Kane considering he didn't actually need to go anywhere early and had every intention of staying for a bit.
“Morning,” Kane mumbled sleepily. He was teetering right on the edge of really waking up or drifting off again, but the thought of Adrian having to leave was pretty motivating, and Kane forced his eyes open and drew in a deeper breath. He shifted his legs in closer to tangle their thighs together and pressed a kiss to Adrian’s jaw. “How’re you feelin’?” he drawled. Kane tugged his pillow tighter under his head and smirked a tiny bit. Adrian didn’t look like he was suffering too bad, but Kane couldn’t imagine that he wasn’t hungover at all. He just hoped it wouldn’t fuck up whatever he had to do today that wasn’t lounging around in Kane’s bed.
"Good," Adrian almost purred at him as he snuggled in against him and turned around more fully now that he knew that it was safe to move more without jostling Kane awake. He still seemed really sleepy so he wasn't going to rush him out of bed, but that didn't mean he couldn't cuddle and kiss him. "Someone took really good care of me last night," he added with a little grin and god he felt sappy about it. For all his fantasies of boyfriends, he'd never really let himself dream about being really loved, it had all been mostly sex and companionship but this went beyond that. "How are you feeling?" he asked, drawing his fingers through Kane's unruly hair.
Kane made the little shifts to allow both of them to be comfortable as Adrian changed positions, glad he didn’t want -- or need -- to jump up right away. He gave a soft huff through his nose, his fingers curling and uncurling slowly against the skin of Adrian’s back. “Oh you mean when I knocked your ass out with my dick?” he murmured, looking smug through his sleepiness. It was easier to joke than acknowledge that he’d taken the time to clean Adrian up and make him comfortable. Or that he’d made sure there was water within reach, and he’d woken up a few times in the night to check on his breathing. “I’m good,” he murmured more sincerely, smiling a bit.
"Yeah, that," Adrian tittered but there was warmth to his voice that suggested that no, it was all those other things he was thinking of, but it was funny that he'd passed out and now at least he knew for sure he had. "Hope I didn't hurt your feelings, but you've really got nobody to blame but yourself and your powerful dick," he teased as he snuck little kisses on Kane's chin. "K. O." He was sure there was some funny video game reference he could make about Kane's power move but he was honestly not awake enough to even try.
Kane snickered and nudged their faces together affectionately. “Nah, I took it as a compliment,” he answered. He knew it had much more to do with the alcohol in Adrian’s system than anything he’d done, but his feelings had been the opposite of hurt -- it had given him a deep sense of warmth and intimacy that Adrian let himself be so vulnerable. The only thing Kane had wanted was to take care of him and keep him safe. He pressed a few kisses on Adrian’s cheeks and forehead before stretching his legs out with a little groan. “Sleep okay? Got a headache or anything?”
"Must have slept good 'cause I feel good right now," Adrian replied and getting loved on like this was just making him feel better. He wasn't thinking about the night before, more focused on the here and now, Kane's presence keeping his mind from wandering much. "How about you? You did all the heavy lifting last night. You sore?" He grinned again, rubbing more pointedly at Kane's back and although it would hardly qualify as any kind of a massage, it probably felt nice. It felt good to him too, touching his lover in any way, feeling that broad, scarred back and expanse of skin under the palm of his hand.
It did feel nice, being touched. Kane had always liked to indulge in as much touching as he could when he hooked up with someone, like he could save it for the lonely nights. But this thing with Adrian always felt different. Kane wasn’t just trying to fill the hole inside of himself until the next person came along, he was genuinely greedy for every bit of affection from this man. He hummed a soft negative sound. “Right as rain,” he murmured. “Feeling good too.” Maybe once he really started to think about how the night had gone he would start to feel a little embarrassed, but right then he just had that sweet sense of floating. “I wasn’t the one partyin’ hard though.” He grinned a little.
"Yeah, that's true, you weren't the one deadlifting strippers all night," Adrian teased. "Swarmed by them, like bees on a honeycomb. Just so many strippers." He kept touching Kane, firm and affectionate, vaguely remembering riling him up with jealousy the night before. "Don't worry, no guy strippers for me, it was all women." He was rambling a little, murmurings of a newly awake person and it was ridiculous but cozy to just run his mouth. "If you'd been there, they'd have been all over you." He narrowed his eyes as he remembered what Kane had said shortly before he passed out. "You were there... weren't you?"
Kane huffed and rolled his eyes as Adrian rambled about strippers, his grin turning sheepish. It sounded totally ridiculous when said like that, but the intense jealousy he’d felt the night before had been so real. There was nothing rational about it, he was just glad that Adrian seemed kind of into it instead of repulsed. At least when he was drunk and horny -- Kane was about to find out how he felt about it in the daylight. “Eh ... not inside,” Kane said, squinting one eye in a little cringe. “I was out in my truck when you texted. Waited around for a little while before I came in.” One of his eyebrows quirked a bit as he studied Adrian’s face.
Adrian mirrored his expression a bit as he raised an eyebrow and kept squinting at Kane. "Were you jealous or worried?" he asked after a beat. "Or both?" He didn't really know what Kane might have been worried about but in this town it was easy to worry about any little thing. Maybe he'd just been bored, sad he couldn't come along to a bachelor party and have fun because Adrian was still stuck in a dumb closet. "Bored?" he offered as a way out, not letting up on his rubbing and stroking Kane's back. That thought that he probably should be bothered by this surfaced again but he just couldn't feel it, if anything he liked Kane had been near by and yet had respected him enough to stay away and not actually come inside and force a conversation.
He scraped his teeth over his bottom lip as he considered how to answer. It had been a jumbled mix of emotions, a combo of all those things plus more. Trying to make it sound like he’d had better motivations than he’d had seemed stupid though -- Kane had killed this man, a little stalking didn’t seem worth lying about. “Mm, little of column A, little of column B ...” he murmured. “I couldn’t think about nothin’ but you, being hot, surrounded by hot people ... it was driving me crazy. But I don’t trust those guys either, so I was worried too.” He’d done his best to resist the urge to leave his apartment, but his best obviously hadn’t been good enough. He hadn’t gone to make a scene, that wasn’t his style, he’d just wanted to check on things. “I wasn’t gonna ruin your night,” he added, softer.
Adrian thought back on what he could remember and yes, he had been surrounded by hot people and Kane probably would have been jealous as fuck if he'd actually come inside. Aaron was very affectionate when drunk and some of the other guys had been the grabby types of straight boys who Adrian often felt acted a lot gayer than ever a gay guy did. It had been nice and fun but also completely not sexual in any way but he was glad he didn't have to explain that to someone just seeing it from the outside. "I know you weren't," he said soothingly, raking his fingers through Kane's hair again as he kissed him lightly on the lips. He didn't really know, of course. They were both completely irrational about each other and it wouldn't have surprised him if Kane had shown up, drunk and sulky about being a dirty secret. Adrian wasn't even sure he could have blamed him. The only thing he was fairly sure about now was that Kane couldn't have ruined his night, but that was probably love chemicals clouding his brain. "Thanks for coming to get me," he murmured. "You're the only uber driver I like around here."
“Good, those other motherfuckers ain’t shit,” Kane drawled, a faint smile tugging at his lips. Adrian could’ve been mad about the intrusion, even if Kane stayed in his car. He was glad he didn’t have to go through the whole ‘of course I trust you’ conversation. It wasn’t about that, and Adrian seemed to know it. Or they weren’t in that kind of partnership or whatever. Would Adrian have been jealous if Kane had been the one going to a bachelor party? He seemed to handle the thing with Brianna well enough ... but maybe he was just good at hiding the jealousy. Maybe he was just as insane about Kane on the inside, and that was why he was so accepting of his stalking. Kane pressed another couple of soft kisses to Adrian’s mouth. “I’ll come get you anywhere, anytime,” he mumbled. It made him think of the times Adrian had been held captive and instead of a flood of guilt, he had the useless urge to go back in time and rescue Adrian from those places. He pressed in closer and squeezed Adrian’s body a bit. “Did you have fun though? Aaron looked pretty happy when I pulled up ...” There was a note of hesitation in Kane’s voice, he wasn’t sure if Adrian remembered that he’d come out to the groom.
"Yeah?" Adrian murmured as he tried to remember again. Images from the night before crossed his mind but then his stomach suddenly dropped as he took in the implication of Aaron meeting Kane. They'd met - because... he'd told Aaron he was gay. "Oh fuck," he whispered, the color draining out of his face a bit. Had he told anyone else? He remembered one of Aaron's friends talking about being bi, mostly because he'd told Kane about it, did that random stranger know? "He knows about you," he added with a sense of troubled bewilderment, his stomach doing some serious churning and flipping at the thought. Aaron had been very cool about it, but he was Aaron and he was not going to be keeping a serious secret from Mila - although... Adrian's stomach sank more as he remembered their conversation only that wasn't something he could really talk to Kane about. "Oh shit," he whispered instead, his hands stilling on Kane's back and in his hair.
Kane watched the realization dawn on Adrian, getting some anxious rumbles in his own stomach. He was starting to look kind of horrified, and while Kane understood why, it still didn’t feel good. He knew in his brain it was best not to take it personally, but that didn’t make it easy. Adrian’s hands stopped moving, but Kane’s didn’t, his thumb rubbing slowly against Adrian’s skin. “Don’t panic,” he murmured. “He was pretty wasted, maybe he won’t remember.” That probably sounded lame, but it honestly seemed likely, given how drunk Aaron had been. They had technically already met, and Kane was an uber driver, so if Aaron’s memory was fuzzy, maybe Adrian could play it off like a coincidence. Or he could take the opportunity to finally be honest with his family -- at least his sister. Kane wasn’t about to suggest that though, not yet. “It’ll be okay, even if he does. You seemed sure he wouldn’t tell.”
Adrian wasn't even sure if he was upset about coming out because the upset over what Aaron had told him was overriding it pretty hard. He shook his head and blew air through his lips a bit noisily before trying to settle back down. There was nothing he could do about this now, he might be awake and happy but he was pretty sure Aaron was still drooling into his pillow and would be for a few more hours before he woke up with the hangover of a lifetime. "I was kinda stupid last night, in case you didn't notice," he murmured. "But so was he... Fuck." He wanted to tell Kane, if only so he wouldn't be alone with this knowledge of Aaron's abuse, but he had sworn not to tell anyone and it wasn't like he could stop it from happening now by talking. Aaron seemed nonchalant about it but he thought he'd picked up on some hurt there underneath the facade, even if he didn't seem to get it. If it hadn't hit him already, it would when his little girl was born and he realized how fucking small and immature children really were. "I'm... I'm just processing," he mumbled. "A lot happened..."
He was oblivious to what else was said, or even how the coming out had actually gone down. Aaron seemingly hadn’t had a problem with it, but Kane didn’t know him well. Kane didn’t think Adrian would like his future brother in law so much if he was openly homophobic, and he probably wouldn’t have been so happy the night before if it had gone badly, but that didn’t mean it wouldn’t be a big deal when Aaron sobered up. Or that it wouldn’t be a big deal to Mila. Kane kept gently petting him and watching his face. He felt a weird sort of guilt for putting Adrian in this situation, even though none of it had ever felt like a choice. How they met, how they connected, the violence, the crazy lust, Adrian’s desire to stay in the closet ... Kane felt much more along for the ride than in control of anything. “What else happened?” he asked quietly, but there was nothing accusatory in his tone. The sex the night before had put any irrational jealous worries to rest. For the moment, anyway -- that possessive streak was part of his DNA.
Adrian made a soft sound that was half a whine and half a growl and he hoped Kane understood it as it was intended, 'please wait, I am literally processing'. He kept his eyes closed as he did just that, scanning his unruly and drunken memories for what exactly he had done and if he had told anyone else. "There was just... So much," he murmured, eyes still closed as he went through the evening as rationally as he could. "I was talking to some guy who was talking about bringing his boyfriend to the wedding and if that would be weird and it's like so much has changed and I don't- just ten years ago we would never had had that conversation you know?" he was talking slowly, sussing things out and he could just feel Kane's patient but worried look on him so he kept his eyes closed to try to maintain some kind of link to those fuzzy memories. "And I don't know why I told Aaron, I was gonna say something completely different and I just blurted out I'm gay like- I couldn't even laugh it off and he was so cool about it." He groaned again. "And then he told me some personal shit I really don't wanna know and it's none of my fucking business and I wanna forget it all and just erase that whole part of the evening." But that was so selfish and horrible that he felt shitty just for thinking about it. He opened his eyes, letting the vague memories that were less important slip away as he peered at Kane. "He likes you though, you saved his fiancée. You're golden."
It was difficult to be patient while Adrian thought through all of it, but Kane managed, just watching the way his dark lashes twitched against his cheek and the tension that came and went in random parts of his face. Kane shifted so his head was propped up on one hand, and listened to the memories that came out of Adrian’s mouth. He wondered immediately who the other guy with a boyfriend was, but it wasn’t his business, and in another moment he was more concerned about what Aaron had told Adrian that was such cursed knowledge. ‘Personal shit’ meant he shouldn’t ask, but now his curiosity was piqued -- considering Adrian’s perspective and experiences in life, it had to be pretty bad if he wanted to erase the entire conversation. “He just don’t know me yet,” Kane murmured, offering a faint smile when Adrian opened his eyes. It was good that he’d already accidentally made a good impression with Adrian’s family, if they were going to Know about him at all ... whether he could maintain that good impression was a totally different question. He idly stroked Adrian’s skin some more with his free hand. “That’s ... yeah that sounds like a lot,” he murmured. “He took it well though, right? Drunk people are bad at lying, so ... that’s a good sign, yeah?”
Adrian huffed in disapproval at that self deprecation no matter how slight it was, but then he thought about Kane's question with a faint smile. "Aaron is... He's like a golden retriever, you know? I never had any reason to really worry about him. I mean, he's just- he fucking loves people, even his stone-cold brothers. Mila though, I don't know. Not a puppy at all. I don't know what to expect with her. She might be cool about it or she might be cold about it. She's not drama like my mom though, she'll just look at me different." It sounded like such a 'no big deal' when he said it out loud, but he kept imagining a look in her eye that he never wanted to see in real life. He was her big brother and she'd been mad as hell at him in the past but that was over some stupid pranks or making fun of her toys or something small time like that. This was so much bigger and they were adults now. He just wanted her to still look up to him and not think of him as some kind of a freak. "I feel like it's just a matter of time before he tells her, she'll know something's up."
Part of Kane was tempted to snort and roll his eyes, but he resisted the urge. If he got all hung up on how Bailey looked at him, he would be crippled with guilt and anxiety, and probably just never speak to her again. But not everybody had the same kind of relationship with their siblings, and he could understand that Adrian didn’t want to cause his family any more pain than he already had, intentional or not. “Why would she be cold about it?” Kane asked, wanting to help him think it through rationally now that it was more of a possibility in the near future. “Does she have something against gay people?” Kane knew the Morettis were pretty religious, but Adrian had never said anything about his sister being a bigot because of it. He could understand being more nervous about coming out to an old school Italian Catholic mom, but his younger sister too? “How do you not want her to look at you, that outweighs her seeing all of you in the first place?”
These were good questions, but they were also bad questions because the more Adrian thought about the answer the more he realized this was some fucked up path of pain that intertwined with a shit ton of trauma. "Just... disappointment, man," he mumbled and maybe it was different now because he had Kane, but when he first got home after all these years - it felt like Mila was all he had. His friends were dead, his parents were loving but they would never understand any of what he'd been through and the thought of losing his sister too because of something so stupid had been terrifying. "And shit, I don't want her to see all of me," he added. "I don't even want you to see all of me... but you do." He ran his fingers lightly over Kane's skin. "I should probably tell her though, if she hears it from Aaron she'll never forgive me, even if she's cool with it."
Internalized homophobia wasn’t rational, and Kane knew it -- he’d been through plenty of agonizing over what his sexuality meant for his masculinity -- but it could still be frustrating in someone else. Kane knew for a fact that his being bisexual would’ve done more than disappoint his father, it would’ve enraged the old man to the point of violence. Granted, it had never taken much to do that, Kane just had to look at him wrong to get hit, but part of him was pretty sure his father would’ve sent him to the hospital if he’d come out, if not into an early grave. In the face of that, hearing that Adrian was so worried about being disappointing was a little hard to swallow.
But he swallowed it anyway, because he loved this man and not everybody had had the kind of life Kane had. He was glad that was the most Adrian had to worry about. And he had to try not to let his own desire to be seen and accepted as part of Adrian’s life seep into his thoughts too much. Adrian might come out as gay, but he could still downplay their relationship to avoid weird questions. If Kane hadn’t been face to face with Aaron the night before, Adrian might not have mentioned him at all. He told himself he had to stop wanting to be important. Kane licked his lips and nodded a bit. “I bet you a dollar she’ll be more pissed you stayed in the closet so long than disappointed in you,” he murmured. Kane couldn’t know it would all be okay with Mila, but he had a strong suspicion. Adrian just needed to give her the chance to surprise him.
"How about I bet you a dollar she'll be pissed and you bet me a thousand dollars she'll be fine with it," Adrian said in a lame attempt at a joke. "That way if she's pissed I'll at least get something out of it." He huffed softly and thought about how he would still have three people who cared about him in his corner if everything came spilling out now. Aaron would always side with Mila, but he'd still support him and no doubt speak up for him, Kane was now part of his life and they'd be practically living together by this time the next day and then there was Toby who himself was gay and so supportive. He moved to hold onto Kane in more of a hug for a few seconds, clinging to him tightly. He knew some about Kane's past and he knew that in comparison his worries about his family were peanuts but that didn't help quell the panic that rose inside him just thinking about it - it just added sympathy for Kane. "She'll wanna meet you," he mumbled. "...again."
Kane slid his arm more solidly around Adrian as he hugged him, leaning into it a bit to breathe in the warm scent of his skin and hair. He knew already that if Adrian’s family were assholes to him about this, he would want to go rip them all to shreds with his bare hands. He wouldn’t do that of course, but he was going to have Adrian’s back no matter what. Kane would do more than go to bat for him, he’d go to war. He stroked his hand against Adrian’s hair and gave a little grunt. “You don’t gotta talk about me,” he murmured after a moment. “If it’s easier to just ... talk about it as a concept.” Their relationship was inscrutable even to them, he didn’t want to put pressure on Adrian to have to explain it to anyone else, especially family. It was probably a useless suggestion because Aaron had met him and ‘are you seeing anyone’ was a very natural question during a coming out, but still. The offer was there.
Adrian knew Kane would come up one way or another, Aaron knew about him and Mila would too. That was really the least of his worries here, as long as they didn't somehow find out about their sordid history together. He liked the made up story of how they'd met because Kane rescued Adrian's sister off the side of the road, it was a good front. "Is that something you don't want me to talk about?" he asked not out of any real worry about it, more out of consideration. If Kane didn't want to get involved with the potential messy situation, he didn't want to drag him into it. Aaron would probably have an easier time keeping quiet about who Adrian was seeing than the gay thing, if he even remembered the gay thing.
The question gave Kane such weirdly mixed feelings. On one hand he valued his invisibility, being able to come and go as he pleased without ruffling too many feathers ... but that ship had long since sailed with him and Adrian. He’d already made promises not to disappear. He didn’t want to disappear, unless this relationship went completely south and Adrian told him to fuck off forever. On the other hand, there was a part of him that was desperate to be known, seen, accepted, pulled into a family and loved in spite of everything he’d done and everything he was or wasn’t. Kane knew it was a foolish pipe dream to hope for that out of Adrian’s family, and way too much pressure on the situation, but as long as he kept it bundled up tight inside himself, it wouldn’t do any harm, right? Only to him, and he could handle it. “Talk about it if you want to, but ... only if you want to,” he answered, feeling a little lame about it but not sure how else to answer. Neither a solid Yes or No felt right.
It really wasn't a yes or no question because yes would feel too demanding while no felt like denial of what they had. Kane's answer really was perfect in that it seemed like he didn't mind either way. "I mean, I think she suspects I'm seeing someone," he said and based on the way Aaron had reacted made him think that even if he couldn't really remember what he'd said. "Always sneaking off to Portland." He smiled faintly and god he wanted to go back, hang out for a week this time, just him and Kane having a lovely time together. It'd all be easier once he moved in here of course, but it still wasn't the same. They could go to restaurants and bars in Portland, hell they'd gone bed-shopping together there. "I'm lucky she likes you already, hard not to when you swooped in all hero-like for her and then went above and beyond by changing her tire."
The reality of it was really sinking into Kane now, and he felt a nervous twinge in his stomach. It wasn’t even empathy-nerves for Adrian’s sake -- him coming out even partway legitimized this whole thing to some degree. Mila would want to meet him again, probably have them over for dinner or something normal and domestic like that. She would ask questions about his work, his family. They could lie about how they met, but Kane couldn’t fabricate his entire life. What if Mila completely accepted her brother was gay, but disapproved of Kane so hard that Adrian started to agree with her? “Nah, that was nothin’,” he murmured with a soft huff through his nose. “I’ve changed a million tires. Just glad I was headed that way when I was. So ... yeah, hope she keeps likin’ me.” His lips twisted a little. Kane tried to push that insecurity down, this wasn’t about him. “She sounds smart though, and if she’s smart she knows it doesn’t change anything about you, and she loves you. So it’ll be okay, Adrian.”
Being reassured about it felt weird when it didn't seem like such a big deal right now in light of everything else - or maybe it never had been a big deal to begin with. Maybe Adrian had just never had anyone to talk to about it so it built up in his head until he thought it was massive and then saying it all out loud made it more reasonably sized. It made him feel a little silly and yet that anxiety was still there, gnawing at him and probably wouldn't stop until he had talked to Mila. Then it'd get better - or worse - and the thought of getting rid of it made him feel weird too somehow. "It'll be okay," he repeated, though he couldn't say the same for Aaron. Was he dealing with his horrible secret in any way? Did he even realize how fucking awful it was? "Now I can play the 'at least I'm not dead' card, a pretty powerful move."
Kane chuckled faintly and gave his hair a loving little pull. “It’s the ultimate move, you’re all set,” he agreed. He was vaguely relieved that Adrian wasn’t completely panicking. This had been such a big cloud of anxiety hanging over him, maybe having it decided and out of his control now was something of a relief. Telling his sister probably wouldn’t be as nerve-wracking as telling his parents, if he ever chose to, but it was still the first step. Kane kissed his face a couple more times, not really aware of how much Aaron’s secret was still weighing on him. “So since you’re not dead ... you hungry? I’ll make you breakfast, like some good, normal-ass boyfriend.” He hoped food would delay Adrian from having to leave for a little while, give them some time to hang out and maybe fool around in the kitchen a bit. Out or not, Kane was very much looking forward to Adrian just living down the hall.
"You'll make me breakfast?" Adrian nearly purred at him, soaking in all the love and kisses happily. He could point out there was nothing normal about Kane but the idea of a 'normal boyfriend' moment was sweet so he didn't want to diminish that with lame humor. "You haven't spoiled me enough already?" he asked contently, running his fingers through Kane's hair again. He'd been so damn good to him today, picking him up and cleaning him up and now he was going to feed him. Adrian was feeling a bit like royalty and he was eating it up. He was getting hungry and he definitely needed to get up soon to take a leak, but he still wanted to just lounge in bed a little longer. They could probably do that again later, maybe even be decadent as fuck and eat in bed.
His reaction was everything, and Kane suddenly wanted to make it the best goddamn breakfast Adrian had ever had, even though he wasn’t that good in the kitchen. He was decent with eggs and bacon though, and it was hard to fuck up toast. Kane just loved that blissful smile on Adrian’s face. “Hell no, no such thing,” Kane drawled with a lazy smile of his own. “I’ll make you all kindsa breakfast, all you can eat buffet, a la Kane.” He snickered a bit. He needed a piss too, and to brush his teeth, but he wasn’t in a big rush either, comfortable and cuddled. “How late can you stay?” he asked in a lower murmur, letting his fingers drift down to the side of Adrian’s face and the big scar on his temple that felt so fascinating for some reason.
"A little while?" Adrian replied. "Wasn't planning on rushing out of here unless you got other plans." He had planned on getting home before Mila did but the more he thought about it, the more he didn't want to. She deserved some alone time with Aaron and Adrian wasn't sure he wanted to talk to Aaron alone right away, fully aware neither of them was going to be ready to talk about what Aaron had told him but it'd be hard not to bring it up. "Might just call Aaron in the afternoon, make sure he's breathing and if he wants to have some alone time with Mila when she gets home." If he had more things to pack, he should be going home to do just that because he was moving tomorrow - but most of the things he had were being delivered tomorrow and there wasn't a lot he had to grab from Mila's place. "Unless you get sick of me, I can stay here and just... lounge with you."
That was a far better answer than Kane had dared to hope for, and he smiled reflexively. He wanted Adrian to stay for as long as he possibly could, Kane couldn’t even conceive of getting sick of him at this point, as weird as that was. His tolerance for people could fluctuate a lot, but the only times he could recall wanting Adrian to go away had been when the wendigo was being an asshole. There was no sign of that now, just a happy and hot boyfriend who he got to spend a lot of the day with. If he’d had any plans, they would’ve been tossed aside without a second thought. Instead of answering with words, Kane gave a pleased little growl and roll-tackled Adrian onto his back, climbing on top of him to pin him down and assault him with kisses to his face and neck and whatever else Kane could reach. “Mine for the night, mine for the day ... gettin’ spoiled fast,” he grunted in between smooches.
Adrian snickered with delight at the tackle, patting at Kane's sides where he could reach and when the initial amusement passed, he stole a kiss from Kane back, humming contently. "I should probably leave town for a couple of days sometime next week so you don't get unbearable," he murmured, but there was no way he wanted to do that without taking Kane with him. They were both stupidly hooked on this thing and he was so damn relieved it wasn't a one way thing. Their love and passion burned hot but it was a nice, cyclical thing and if that circle broke, something was bound to explode in a bad way. It should probably terrify him, but he just couldn't imagine it happening, or at least not something initiated by either of them.
The chances of this exploding in their faces were pretty high, but Kane couldn’t care. It was too late now to pull out of it because of fear, Kane was all in, and in spite of occasional bouts of insecurity, he thought that was mutual. They were going to see it through, however it ended. The only thing Kane couldn’t see them doing was getting bored of each other. “Yeah you probably should,” Kane agreed, re-settling his weight to squish Adrian into the mattress a bit harder. He wanted to gnaw on him and bruise him with hugs and crack his bones. “That’ll make stalking you a fun challenge. I’ll find your ass.” Kane grinned and nipped Adrian’s chin, then started to pull away so they could get up.
Leave it to Kane to take a bad idea and make it appealing although the idea of being hunted down probably shouldn't appeal to Adrian like it did. It was different because it was Kane and getting caught wouldn't result in getting locked up or killed - just fucked and kissed and crushed into a mattress just like that. The real challenge would be to give Kane a challenge because he'd want to be found. "Let's be real, I'd never make it hard for you to find my ass," he tittered, reaching up to stroke and then nudge Kane's face a little more firmly than gently. He sat up when he had the chance to, watching Kane with warmth in his eyes. "I always want you to find me."
“Mmhmm, gonna take you to the vet and have them put a tracker in your neck,” he teased as he climbed off the mattress. The sentiment made his twisted little heart happy though, and the smile stayed on his face all the way into the bathroom. Their unique states of fuckedupness really did fit together well. Kane hadn’t even been able to stay away from him while he was out at a strip club that didn’t even cater to his tastes, could he tolerate a weekend with Adrian out of town? Maybe if Adrian had been repulsed by the idea of Kane finding him ... he at least would’ve tried harder to mind his own business. But they were made for each other, so maybe that wasn’t necessary. Kane stepped up to the sink to brush his teeth.
Adrian ambled after him, rubbing what remained of sleep from his eyes before he took a piss. They both needed a shower and some breakfast and it was refreshing to have enough time to indulge in that and not feel like they had to use every minute to the max because they had so few of them. If he told Mila, there'd be a lot less hiding - and he was about to move in here so even without her knowing, they'd still have some more time to themselves. It was both intimidating and exhilarating because while he didn't foresee them getting tired of each other - what if they did? He knew in the core of his bones he'd never find something like this again with anyone else and it went so far beyond the usual lovesick nonsense. They were both monsters in their own way and sentient and ethical monsters were hard to come by. Dating a 'normal' person would feel lonely and a bit like he was sabotaging someone's life. He joined Kane by the sink and slipped his arms around him. "Shower, then breakfast," he said rather than asked. "You're gonna make me a good toast, right?"
It felt so nice and homey to do such mundane things together. Being in the room with someone else taking a piss probably shouldn’t have been romantic, but it kind of felt that way to Kane. He’d been in love before, but he’d never had a grown adult relationship with this sort of domesticity. And he knew just as deeply as Adrian did that this was his only shot at it. Even if he found someone else who wasn’t quite human -- like Brianna with her magic -- they would never fit him like Adrian did. Kane wasn’t just a reaper, he was a hunter and a warrior and he didn’t know how to be anything else. Adrian not only liked that dark streak in him, he had his own darkness to match it. Even if Kane’s insecurity sometimes screamed that Adrian could and should find a better partner than him ... odds were that would just mean more hiding parts of himself. Just like Kane would have to do with someone else. And gods, it felt so fucking good to just relax and be who he was. Kane draped his arms around Adrian in return and huffed a bit. “Toast, eggs, bacon ... real breakfast,” he murmured as he gave him a nuzzle. “Unless you want just toast, I’ll make it perfect.”
"Real breakfast," Adrian tittered and he could probably do with that since he hadn't been eating as much lately as he probably should be, so relieved not to have to eat all the damn time that it was easy to forget to unless he got into a routine like he did at work. "Not gonna say no to that," he added. "When I'm all moved in I'll invite you over for a proper home made meal, how about that?" It might not happen right away, he was going to need to start stacking up on appliances and ingredients before he could do that, but he was off to a good start with the money for his first monster kill - even if they'd ended up paying that back in different ways. Hell, he could probably cook something right here in Kane's kitchen if he familiarized himself with it and bought whatever was missing - it'd be less of a hassle. There was just something different about using his own kitchen.
“I mean, I’m always down to eat,” Kane drawled and flashed a smile. He wasn’t very accomplished in the kitchen, but he could make a few things pretty well. Kane had already assumed they would be eating together regularly, and he wanted to cook for Adrian too. More than just morning-after breakfast. Kane pressed a few soft kisses against Adrian’s lips and patted his ass. “Gonna make you fat and happy,” he murmured with a faint grin. That might not even be possible with his cursed metabolism, but Kane could hopefully cover the happy part. He wanted to make Adrian as happy as people like them could be. Kane kissed him one more time, then moved toward the shower so that happiness could start with being clean.
"What, too bony for you right now?" Adrian teased but he thankfully wasn't quite as skinny as he had been when he first got home. There wasn't a whole lot of difference in how he looked, but he could feel it himself, like his body was no longer in starvation mode and felt more normal again. "Maybe I'll make you fat and happy," he suggested playfully, bumping his hip against Kane before heading for the shower. "Or we can be fat and happy together, but only when you're ready to stop hunting, I don't want you to make a good snack for some critter out there just 'cause you can't run anymore." He wouldn't be surprised if Kane could run just fine even if he got fat, he'd just get more muscular to carry it.
“Excuse you, I’m already a good snack,” Kane protested. He flexed one arm and leaned in to kiss his bicep, then snickered and rolled his eyes at himself. He tried to picture them as old men with paunch bellies and gray hair, and it was such a surreal idea. Kane had never thought he would live that long, much less with a partner of some kind. He leaned into the shower to turn it on and let it warm up before they climbed inside. “And you’re not too bony, you’re perfect,” he added. Maybe it sounded corny, but it was true. He would be delicious to Kane in any kind of body, he just wanted Adrian to feel good and healthy and taken care of. He ushered them into the shower and let Adrian have the hot water first, leaning one shoulder against the tile wall. “I wonder if you can even do that, get fat,” he mused.
"Give me a few years and we'll find out," Adrian murmured and he was pretty damn happy that the idea didn't scare him - neither the idea of getting fatter or telling Kane to stick around for that long. He'd never gained much weight before, even with his mother's cooking, but he'd been young and active at the time and everyone's bodies changed with age. Maybe he was more likely to get fat now after all the trauma and his body's metabolism getting all messed up, there was no way of knowing that since he didn't exactly have any examples to look to, there were so many things he probably owed to science with what had happened to him but he wasn't willing to become a guinea pig again. He turned under the water as he soaped himself briskly, smiling at Kane who indeed did look like a snack.
A few years. Would they still be together in a few years? Kane rarely thought ahead that far, except for making sure arrangements were in place for his death. He never banked on having ‘a few more years’ left and that rarely bothered him ... but now, watching that little smile on Adrian’s face as he washed himself, Kane wanted them with a sort of intensity that felt new. He wanted to still be right there in a few years, with Adrian in arm’s reach, lathered up with soap and looking at him with love. Maybe that was a pipe dream, but it felt pretty fucking good to have any dreams at all these days. Kane stepped in closer, under the water, and pulled Adrian in close by the hips, murmuring a soft “c’mere” before he kissed him.
Adrian tried not to think about the future too much because there were so many potential things to worry about. Could he die? If he couldn't die, would he still grow old? Would he just stay like this forever and watch everyone he loved pass away, like some damn vampire? Had that one time he didn't die just been a fluke? No, it was too much to think about when he could focus on the precious current moment instead. Five years down the road wasn't scary at least, maybe even ten years was doable, anything beyond that felt like some unknowable and possibly tragic void. Kane's kiss was a beautiful distraction from it all and he leaned in against his body as he kissed him back, cupping his face with both hands to feel the subtle movements of his jaw as he deepened the kiss.
It was bliss to stand there in the hot water and feel Adrian’s lithe -- not bony! -- body pressed against him and the caress of their lips together. Only time could really tell if they had a future together, and they may still be wondering the same shit ten years down the road. Kane knew for sure they had the present, at least, and that was really all that mattered when you got down to it. He slid his hands slowly up and down Adrian’s sides and back, spreading the soap around but not really washing him with any intent. Kane just liked how it felt to glide his palms over the curves of his body. His tongue moved to brush against Adrian’s and he felt familiar warmth bloom in his gut. It seemed that every part of him was an absolute sucker for this man, it took nothing at all to make him crave this man. “We’re gonna become hermits when you move in,” he murmured in between kisses, and gave an amused huff through his nose.
Adrian just tittered at the notion because he knew he wouldn't at least; he still had family and friends who'd want to see him - and he would want to see them too, of course. Still, the idea of spending more nights at home just relaxing - cuddling, fucking - was really sweet and he kind of felt like they'd already started, like he didn't have to go back to Mila's tonight to pack up what little he had. He couldn't help but think that if he was out of the closet, he could just move in with Kane but that idea was insane either way. It'd be better to have his own place so they'd still have some independence from each other, even if they might not use it much. "Gonna put it to the test," he murmured against Kane's lips. "See if I can make you sick of me."
Kane would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about talking Adrian into moving in with him. It would probably be a ridiculously foolish thing to do, even just for the mundane reason that neither of them had ever lived with a partner before, but he was still tempted sometimes. He knew Adrian already had more of a life than he did -- a challenging job, friends, more family than just a sister who didn’t like him and a dying mom -- so they wouldn’t be together twenty four hours a day or anything. There would probably be full days when Kane didn’t see him. Maybe that was healthy, even if his current appetite for Adrian didn’t like it. They both had keys to one another’s places, so they’d be able to grab moments here and there. “Go ahead and try,” Kane challenged, grinning briefly. “I’m stubbornly obsessed with you.” It didn’t feel terrifying to say that out loud anymore, which was either a good sign or a really bad one, he didn’t know.
"Is that so?" Adrian said happily and he knew it already, knew it in a way he thought was impossible to trust another person's feelings. They were too wrapped up in each other to easily break free of those feelings and he was loving every second of it - even so it felt damn good to hear Kane say it out loud, to know he'd followed him to the club even if he hadn't come in, that it would take a lot for him to lose interest. Adrian really didn't want to think about how this might end so he wanted to take all the time he was given with Kane and enjoy it to the fullest. "Well you're not getting rid of me," he added. "So stay obsessed, baby." He kissed him again, this time letting his fingers trail down his neck and over his shoulders, smoothing his hands over his arms to feel those taut muscles there. How could he ever get sick of this man? Everything about him seemed to pull him in like gravity.
‘Losing interest’ in Adrian seemed even less likely as the two of them getting married and settling into a peaceful picket-fence-and-two-dogs sort of life together. He couldn’t see either one happening, but he could imagine losing this overwhelming connection to this man even less. No, Adrian was going to have to end it when the time came, Kane knew it down to his bones. And if ‘the’ time came and Adrian wanted to keep him? They would just have to figure it out from there. Kane liked dogs and picket fences, both. He just hummed his agreement into Adrian’s mouth as he touched him back, palms and fingers running here and there over his slick wet skin. It felt like such an indulgence, spending time just kissing and touching one another in an unhurried way, and some back part of Kane’s mind kept fretting that they were forgetting something, but he knew that just came from having a deadline hanging over their heads. They had hours now, and it was surprising how content he felt just tasting Adrian’s tongue and exploring the lines of his body.
The only thing Adrian really hoped for in the future - near or far - was for more of this and for more time with his family. He was looking forward to being an uncle, whenever he wasn't fretting about what the baby not being human really meant at least. He had his job back, he had his sister back, he had a new brother and he had a boyfriend - even if calling Kane a boyfriend felt a little silly somehow because he was so much more than that, something other than that. He was more than just a dark secret too but Adrian had yet to find a label that fit him. They didn't need labels where they were at now, they were just drawn to each other, eager to touch and kiss and soothe whatever needed soothing. It would be different if people knew, people always demanded labels but he didn't want to think about that yet and he felt protective of not just himself but also of whatever this was between them. He could feel that familiar urgency in his gut and it felt good to dismiss it for once though he knew it'd be easier once he'd sent Aaron and Mila some messages to check up on them. Fretting about them was probably dumb but they and this damn town had given him plenty of reasons to do it anyway. Right now he was content to focus on Kane though, loving the way he was touching him and the way it felt to touch him back, the leisurely kissing making pleasure pool lazily in his center, warmth spreading to his cock.
Adrian could turn him on with a snap of his fingers, but this gradual slow burn worked just as well. Kane’s body responded to all of the kissing and touching and the sensation of Adrian’s cock slowly swelling against his hip. Inhaling sharply through his nose, Kane’s hands slid to Adrian’s lower back to pull him in tighter, his heart picking up speed a bit. He’d promised breakfast and they probably needed to stop and get clean so they could get there before the hot water ran out, but it was difficult to stop something that felt so goddamn good. He’d never had anything with anyone that felt like this, and whether Adrian ever fully came out or not, Kane wanted him. As much of him as he could get, for as long as he could get it. It was a new kind of hunger ... and it did feel like hunger even more than lust, like Adrian was now a bodily need for him. He often thought about their relationship ending, even though he didn’t want to, and it made him feel kind of frantic and crazy. Kane knew it wouldn’t end up good, because things rarely did on a long enough timeline, but that didn’t deter his feelings either. He wasn’t good at describing those feelings to Adrian, so he tried to put it into the kiss and the way he held him close, stretching out the moment for as long as possible. “Still hungry?” Kane murmured finally, and gave Adrian’s bottom lip a nibble.