Jasper Lucas (sinsoftheson) wrote in shadows_rpg, @ 2021-11-19 15:25:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | #june 2018, gavin, gavin x jasper, jasper |
Who: Gavin & Jasper
Where: Home
When: Thursday noon 6/21
Status: complete
Gavin had been in a surprisingly good mood today, which was odd considering the night before he'd had the worst bout of nightmares since he was a kid. He'd been exhausted that morning but weirdly relieved, not quite as depressed and burdened by everything that was going on. He didn't want to question it out of fear it would fade away if he looked too closely, eager to just enjoy it while it lasted. He and Charlie were hosting a cookout tonight and suddenly the idea didn't seem so bad anymore, even if it meant meeting Caden's new wife, something he needed to tell his kids if they hadn't heard already.
He was busy putting up lights in the yard, hoping Jasper and Amelia might come home for lunch so he could talk to them with some time to spare before everyone else showed up. It wasn't strictly his fault they hadn't talked, Jasper had a new job and there hadn't been much time to chat lately. Plus Gavin had just been feeling like shit - until today. He thought he heard Jasper's car out front and so he paused what he was doing to stroll up to the house, listening for the front door.
Jasper’s first day at the shop had been the day before, and it had mostly been safety talk and shadowing one of the other guys who worked there. He’d been scheduled for a morning shift today, and he’d actually managed to get up on time, though he was tired through all of it. It was going to be difficult to adjust his sleeping schedule -- or lack of one -- to be a morning person. Mr. Fox had only made it a half day for him, so he got to go home around lunchtime.
Jasper was ready to shower and flop into bed for a nap as he pulled up to the house and got out of his car. The lack of scuffling paws and slobbery greetings when he walked inside meant the dogs were probably outside, and Jasper took the time to get out of his work boots before he shuffled to the kitchen for something to drink.
Gavin remembered a time when the dogs followed him everywhere he went, but now they were happy to keep frolicking in the yard and barely even looked up as he headed inside. He supposed that was good, they were happier and better adjusted than when he first got them and they got along great with Charlie's dog. "Jasper?" he called out as he headed for the kitchen, then poked his head in and gave his son a little smile. "Thought I heard the Malibu. There's leftovers in the fridge if you wanna heat'em up. Any idea if Amelia's coming home for lunch?"
His dad’s schedule was pretty unpredictable, but Jasper was still mildly surprised to see him there. He hadn’t paid much attention to who’s vehicles were in the driveway. Maybe it was the smile. “No, I dunno,” he answered with a shrug as he reached for the fridge door. He wasn’t quite hungry yet, just thirsty and feeling dirty and tired. “Text her and see.” He wasn’t his sister’s keeper -- they were both quasi-adults with jobs and stuff now. Jasper pulled out a soda can from the fridge and popped it open as he nudged the fridge shut.
Gavin hummed and headed for the coffee maker. "I actually- I wanted to talk to you yesterday but I didn't get the chance," he said as he busied himself with his hands, though he supposed he should sit Jasper down for this one. "I told Caden, Aaron and Kat about Joseph- not your part in it," he was quick to add that last bit, realizing that if he kept stuttering the words out he might send his son into complete shock. "I told them... I said someone came to see me, to tell me he was dead. I'm gonna go tell mom tomorrow, so we can put this all to rest. They're all coming here tonight, so I figured- yeah. They know he's dead."
A wave of weirdness rolled over Jasper and for a second all he could focus on was how cold the soda can was against his fingers and the angle of the light coming in through the kitchen window. It was so strange to talk about it in the cheerful, clean kitchen, like something about reality was out of sync. Jasper’s heart felt like it had tripped over its own feet and was now racing to catch up to something. Caden and Aaron already knew the truth-truth, and he hoped it hadn’t been too hard for them to keep it to themselves when Gavin was talking to all of them. Probably not for Caden. Obviously Aaron had managed, or this conversation would’ve been starting out differently, he was pretty sure. He blinked rapidly for a second and made himself take a drink to try and focus. “What are you gonna tell grandma?” he murmured, another sick fear curling in his stomach. Jasper thought she’d been almost comatose at the time of her husband’s untimely demise, but what if she hadn’t been? What if she remembered?
"That he died on the other side," Gavin replied and he wasn't sure how he was picking up on it - Jasper wasn't showing much of a reaction - but he thought he could feel the change in Jasper's mood. "She'll be sad and then she'll be relieved like everyone else." He turned the coffee maker on and moved closer to Jasper, concern etched into his expression. The paperwork was going to be a pain in the ass and he might have to help her financially for a while but in all honesty it was preferable to Joseph coming back. "It's gonna be just fine, Jasper. Remember, you weren't yourself and neither was he."
That last part was all Jasper really had to cling to -- he hadn’t been himself. Neither had Joseph when he started that fight ... though Jasper had the feeling Joseph had been closer to his true nature than Jasper had been at the time. Maybe that was just justification or wishful thinking or something. He didn’t know for sure and never would. “Does she even ... believe in the other side?” he asked, feeling a little jittery. Jasper had seen his grandmother since he’d gotten back, of course, but only a couple of times and only with other people around, and he didn’t really know what she’d been told or what her faith allowed her to believe or any of that shit. “Is that how they all took it? Caden and them? Sad and then relieved?”
Gavin hadn't talked to his mother in depth about what had happened to Joseph, it had all been vague so far and he honestly didn't know just what she knew. He would tell her all about it if he had to but that meant he couldn't really answer Jasper's question about it now. The second question was no easier and he shook his head, fumbling for words as he stepped closer to his son, lightly touching his shoulder. It wasn't easy to explain to someone else what he couldn't really explain to himself but then he wasn't the one who needed to hear any of it, Jasper was. "Nobody's sad for him," he started. "We're sad for the things he wasn't. That he was a piece of shit for so long that we're not sad to see him go. That's... that's the sad part."
Jasper knew Gavin was trying to make him feel better, but part of him wanted to pull away from that touch, stop having this conversation, go somewhere else. He didn’t move though. His dad already looked concerned enough, all frowny and brow-furrowed. The whole situation was sad, but it was kind of a cold comfort to think that none of Joseph’s kids were going to mourn him much. Nothing about what Jasper had done was good, and it was all just hard to reconcile in his head. He hadn’t accidentally done anyone any favors, he’d traumatized himself and Caden. “Yeah,” he mumbled, not sure what else to say. “I just ... thanks. For not ... telling them all of it.” Even though most of them already knew. Jasper blinked and frowned a bit. “Wait, did you say they’re all coming over?”
"Yeah," Gavin said a bit apologetically. "Charlie wanted- we're all meeting Caden's wife." He couldn't help but frustration in his tone, his idiot brother getting married without any forethought and precaution was going to be a problem, he could just smell it coming. Did Jasper even know about that? Gavin didn't really talk about things, but maybe Charlie had mentioned it. "You don't gotta be here, you know. They'll probably come over around five or six. I'm barbecuing, Charlie's gonna make some side dishes.” He could hear the familiar clacking of panting and nails on the floor which meant the dogs were inside but Max only poked his head in through the kitchen door before venturing off, not too excited since there was no food involved. "Did you know?" Gavin asked, giving Jasper a somewhat awkward frown. "About... what's her name."
Caden’s wife? Those two words sounded weird together, and Jasper gave a puzzled frown of his own. He thought Caden and Roxy had broken up, he’d heard that, but not really anything else. “No?” Jasper answered, his tone prompting for more information. Under normal circumstances -- though what even did that mean anymore -- it would’ve sounded really nice to have a cookout with the family all together, but as it was, Jasper kind of didn’t want to face Caden or Aaron tonight. Like they’d all just be reminded of what they knew and the rest of the family didn’t, and it would suck. “Like, he married somebody not-Roxy?”
So nobody had told him, Gavin supposed he couldn't be surprised about that since he for sure hadn't mentioned the damn thing but he'd somewhat hoped Charlie had told his kids. Would Amelia be more difficult about it? Girls tended to stick with girls and all that so he wasn't sure telling her would be all that pleasant. "Yeah, Vegas style," he sighed, his tone a good indicator of what he thought about the whole thing. "Atlantic City style, I guess. I haven't met her yet. Roxy knows already." He arched his brows and grimaced because Roxy had made it clear she knew by slicing up the tires on Caden's car. At least that was all she'd sliced, he supposed that made Caden lucky.
Jasper couldn’t help the ‘what the fuck’ look on his face that lingered until he purposefully shook it off. That sounded like a stupid impulsive decision, the kind of thing he’d never known Caden to really do. But hell, maybe he just didn’t know his uncle super well. “Okay then, weird,” he muttered. He was still uncomfortable with the idea of the whole family being there later, but he also couldn’t see himself hiding in his basement room during it all, that would probably be suspicious to the family who didn’t know the real truth. “Can I invite Logan over too?” he asked, arching his brows at his dad. He didn’t think Gavin would say no, Logan was practically family too, but he wanted to make sure he had someone there who really knew everything and could keep him steady through it.
"Of course," Gavin said and he could absolutely relate to that look on Jasper's face. He thought he might even be more pissed about the whole thing if he wasn't already feeling overwhelmed with everything else, but unless Caden's wife started messing with the bar he really had no reason to object. Caden was a grown man, allowed to make his own stupid mistakes. "Like I said, you don't have to be here either, you're a teenager, you're kind of automatically excused from family affairs." So was Amelia but Gavin didn't think she really had anywhere else to be. It worried him a little bit and maybe if Jasper decided to not stick around, he'd ask if he'd take his sister with him.
Jasper wasn’t sure that was true, especially after he’d disappeared for so long. People seemed to want to see him more now. But maybe that was wearing off and nobody would care if he and Logan came and went as they pleased. The vaguely hot idea occurred to him of sneaking down to the basement to make out while his whole family was out in the back. Probably just a passing fancy, but whatever. “I’m kinda curious about her now,” he admitted with a tiny half-smile. What kind of woman could convince Caden to impulsively elope in Atlantic City? She had to be hot. “And anything you grill is always good, so. I’ll make an appearance.” Jasper shrugged and sipped some more of his soda. If he felt too weird about it all, he and Logan could escape, he told himself.
Gavin gave him a little smile at the food comment and he had to admit he was curious about Caden's new woman too. He'd seen Caden get more than wasted and he'd never ended up doing something so stupid as marrying before. He hadn't even made dumb mistakes like cheat on his girl so he couldn't imagine what had gotten into him now. Was it all just to get back at Roxy for leaving him? Had he been high? "Well, we'll get to see her tonight," he said. "Unless Caden chickens out or comes to his senses and gets an annulment." The one thing to come out of this was that his little brother could no longer say shit about Gavin's marriage to Ollie. Gavin hadn't had a damn choice in the matter but this was all Caden's doing and he was probably never going to live that down.
Jasper had the fleeting thought that people who’d been through a lot of trauma sometimes did crazy, impulsive things. He felt that tendency in himself all the time now. In a pretty short span of time, Caden had lost a couple of fingers, watched his dad be brutally killed by his nephew, had to clean up the mess and bury the body, then his long-term girlfriend had dumped him ... maybe this Vegas wedding wasn’t too huge of a surprise. Though only a couple of them knew all of that. Jasper wondered if Aaron understood it more than Gavin did, but he sure as fuck wasn’t going to ask. He didn’t want to talk about that shit ever again. “We’ll see, I guess,” Jasper murmured. He took another small slurp from his soda, then started to move away from his dad. “I’m gross, I’m gonna take a shower.” He needed a little time to mentally prepare ... and also to wash all the grease and oil off of himself, before anybody came over.
"The pros of working with cars all day," Gavin murmured sarcastically but he was proud of Jasper and happy he had something to do now, not just with his time but something that put money in his pocket as well. Gavin could help him all he wanted but that wasn't good for a young man's confidence, relying on his dad too much. Gavin just hoped he'd stick to it. He knew trauma could get in the way for some people and Jasper had plenty of that, he just didn't know the extent of his own brother's trauma. "If you end up bored you can come out and help me out in the backyard after your shower," he said. "Charlie wanted everything to be nice so uh, I'm working on that." He didn't have much left to do and Charlie would no doubt be back from the shops soon but he liked offering, just in case Jasper wanted to help out.
“Okay,” Jasper said, giving a little wave over his shoulder as he headed for the stairs. He didn’t know yet if he would help or just lurk in his basement, it depended on how he felt after he got out of the shower. He was definitely going to text Logan to see if he was free for the evening, and wanted to come see a potential family shitshow. He knew Charlie was putting this together to be nice to Caden’s new wife, but she hadn’t seen how they could be when they were all together either. It would be interesting, either way, and if it wasn’t, his dad had already given him the greenlight to fuck off if he wanted to.