Who: Aaron, Caden, Gavin & Kat Where: The Back Porch When: Tuesday night, before midnight
Gavin had sent Caden and Kat a text to come meet him at closing time at the Porch. Now that Caden was back it was time to tell them the news. He wasn't even sure it was bad news, but it wasn't good news either. Just... News. Joseph was dead and he needed to make up some lies about how it happened but that was okay, he could do that. He honestly didn't expect any of them to have that many questions. Hadn't they all been waiting for this for most of their lives? It still hurt, at least for him. On some level he had wanted to love his dad - had wanted even more to be loved by him, clinging to every little good memory he could think of and wishing things had been different. They hadn't been and he knew he should only feel relief but feelings were complicated at best.
He didn't tell Aaron simply because Aaron was at work already and Gavin didn't want him to be curious all night. He was telling his siblings all together or not at all. It wasn't until the last customers had left that he ducked out to the bar and tapped Aaron on the shoulder. "Caden and Kat are coming, we're having a little family meeting. Miles and Jocelyn can finish up out here."
Aaron had been glad that Caden wasn’t closing with them that night -- he was still highly annoyed that Caden had held him financially responsible for what Roxy had done. Just because Mila had been driving didn’t make it their fault, but it hadn’t seemed worth it to argue with his brother and agitate him further. Caden had already obviously lost his mind by marrying some stranger from Atlantic City, Aaron didn’t want to make it worse. So he’d coughed up the five hundred dollars for new tires for Caden’s truck, and gone to sleep silently pissed about it. Fucking idiots, acting like children, all of them. And people said he was the stupid one. Roxy was going to owe him that money back as soon as she had a job again.
He’d been grateful their schedules didn’t overlap the next day, and that he was closing with Gavin and Miles. So Gavin’s news that their brother was coming to the bar made his brows lift and put uncomfortable nerves in his stomach as he followed Gavin toward the back. “Is it a family meeting about how Caden’s gone insane?” Aaron asked.
Gavin gave him the wary look that he was infamous for, the one that said he wasn't willing to discuss it. He wanted to talk to his siblings when they were all there, rather than repeat himself or have Aaron break the news. To be fair, they probably should be talking about how insane Caden was acting, going on a bender and getting married then flaunting that wife in everyone's faces instead of getting an annulment. Aaron had told him all about Shan and all about Roxy showing up to take her frustration out on Caden's car. Gavin couldn't really say he blamed her, the whole situation was sticky.
Aaron knew not to push once he’d gotten the look, so he just sighed and stayed behind his brother. Gavin usually stayed out of everyone’s personal business, so he didn’t truly think this was an intervention about Caden’s marriage. Unless it was for them to strategize about how to keep Shan from fucking with the bar legally or something. Or maybe it was something completely different, Aaron didn’t know. Once they were in the back, he boosted himself up on the counter and swung his boots a bit, glad to be off of his feet for even a few minutes. Aaron didn’t try to talk to Gavin while they waited for the others, because, well ... he knew Gavin.
Gavin tried to keep himself busy while they waited because standing there idly just invited more conversation. His relief was tangible when he heard the door open, followed by a new feeling of panic as he remembered why he had asked them to come in the first place. "I'm gonna get us some drinks," he muttered, making a beeline for the bar to get some rum and some glasses. He thought they could splurge on some good stuff for the occasion, plus it gave him a reason not to be there to answer questions before they were all there.
Kat kind of loved that she could actually attend these family meetings now; she just hated that they were only necessarily when shit hit the fan. Aaron had filled her in on Caden’s recent trip to Atlantic City and the souvenir he brought back and, needless to say, Kat was unimpressed. She assumed tonight’s meeting was about Caden and how he’d lost his fucking mind, though their family had never been the sort for interventions. If they had been, there probably should have been one or another a long time ago. With the main door locked, Kat went around to the back door and spotted Gavin as soon as she walked in, but before she got a chance to say anything he darted from the room, heading back towards the bar. Her attention turned to Aaron instead. “Hey,” she said, dumping her purse on the counter. “Any idea what this is about?”
Aaron wasn’t surprised that Kat showed up first, and he gave her a tiny half smile and leaned forward to hug her with one arm. He was still irritated from all the bullshit yesterday, and not eager to see Caden. Whatever this meeting was about, his elder brother would bring his own special brand of assholery to it, Aaron was sure. “Hey,” he greeted. “No idea. Maybe Gavin and Charlie eloped too, so both of them could steal my wedding thunder, I dunno.” Aaron rolled his eyes. It was unspeakably annoying that Caden, the man who’d sworn a million times he would never marry, had run off and gotten hitched to some random chick right before Aaron’s wedding. He was actually doing it right, so it felt like a dig at him too, even though it had just been Caden being fucking stupid. “No, but he seems upset, so I doubt that’s it,” he added to Kat, nodding toward the door to the bar that Gavin had vanished through.
“Hey, Caden did not steal your thunder,” Kat sternly pointed out. “That would take someone actually being excited for him. What he did was make a big fucking mess of things.” She had thought they were as chock-full of family drama as they could get, but no, Caden had to go and prove her wrong. She would have asked him what he was thinking, except that he clearly wasn’t. The smart thing to do would have been to get the marriage annulled, not to bring the girl home with him and start introducing her around. For all that he liked to play up Aaron being a few tools short, Caden seemed to have lost the whole damn box. Kat sighed, racking her brain over what else it could be that could’ve upset Gavin. “Are the kids alright?” They weren’t so much kids now, but Kat would probably always think of them as such.
“As far as I know,” Aaron answered, giving a little wince. He hadn’t been checking up on his nephew and niece like he ought to, probably, too wrapped up in his own life. Between the wedding and Mila being pregnant -- not to mention Adrian and Roxy both staying with them now -- he’d been pretty preoccupied. “I don’t think he’d be here if they like, really weren’t okay,” he said. Each time both of Gavin’s kids had disappeared, he’d understandably turned into an alcoholic trainwreck and stopped coming to work, so Aaron didn’t think that was the case either. Unless Gavin was going to tell them one of them had cancer or some shit. “Kids are all right, Charlie’s all right, Mom’s all right, I think ...” He trailed off and shrugged helplessly, wishing Caden would hurry up and show so they could get this thing going.
“So what’re we missing?” Kat said quietly, trying to think of what else this could possibly be about. They needed things to be chill for a while, to give them all a chance to recuperate and enjoy themselves at Aaron and Mila’s wedding, not some new flavor of family drama. “How’re things at home?” she asked while they waited. “Has Roxy heard the news?” She knew someone would have to tell her about Caden getting married, but she didn’t envy them at all. She assumed it would be Mila—Kat loved Roxy, but Caden was still her brother and that put her in the middle of things, even when she thought he was being a first class dick.
For some reason Kat’s first question triggered something in Aaron’s mind and he suddenly thought he knew what this was about. It gave him a sinking feeling of dread in his stomach. Joseph was still “missing,” but Jasper was back and had been for a while now. Had he confessed? Did Gavin know the truth now, or something close to it? Aaron decided to keep his mouth firmly shut until he knew, but now that the thought had occurred to him, he was sure this family meeting was about their father. Why else would Kat be there too? Fuck. Aaron tried to focus on the rest of what his sister said, and he gave a little snort. “Yeah she heard,” he muttered. “She swung by yesterday to slash Caden’s tires and fuck up his paint job. And guess who he made pay for new tires?” Aaron pointed both thumbs at himself, looking unamused by the whole thing.
“Shit, Aaron! You didn’t have to pay for anything,” Kat said, shaking her head. “He’s the one who ran out and got married without thinking of the consequences. He doesn’t even know this bitch, and he fucking brought her home with him. He should be the one paying for his actions, not you.” And this was why she needed to be here in Point Pleasant, because otherwise her older brothers would walk all over Aaron. He was sweet, occasionally naive, and so easy to take advantage of, especially by people he cared about. It was just another reason she wanted to throttle Caden. He knew better, plus he couldn’t blame Aaron for disclosing information that was likely to become public knowledge very soon. It wasn’t like he could keep his new wife around and not have anyone find out about her.
Aaron knew that in Caden’s mind, he was aiding and abetting the enemy, Roxy. Just because his fiancee happened to be her best friend and offered her a place to stay, somehow that was Aaron’s fault. He’d even warned Caden that Roxy was coming that day, just to try to be a good brother. Kat’s choice of words made him snort with amusement, but he waved off her concern. “It’s okay. He’s dealing with a lot,” he muttered. “Roxy’s gonna pay me back sometime.” There was so much more than the breakup that Caden was dealing with, Aaron knew that better than anyone else, probably. Aaron had helped bury their father, which had been bad enough, he couldn’t even imagine watching it happen. Thinking about Gavin maybe knowing the truth about it all made his stomach feel crampy and bad, and he wished Caden would fucking arrive already so they could get this over with. Aaron pulled his phone out to text him: you better show. think its about dad
Caden had almost blown off the meeting at the Porch because he didn't want to deal with his siblings bitching at him about Shan. But on the other hand, he was no coward and if they had something to say to him, they had something to say. He could handle it. So he pulled into the parking lot of the porch after closing, wishing he'd had a few drinks first. Since he figured the front door was already locked, Caden went in through the back, blinking once when he saw Aaron and Kat standing there. Family meetings were always called by Gavin... and there was always bad news. So if they weren't there to talk about Shan, Caden figured something else happened. "Where's Gav?"
"Right here," Gavin muttered as he came back from the front. His timing was no accident, he'd waited by the door until he was sure Caden was there - a sad effort to dodge any intrusive questions from his other siblings. He set the glasses down on the counter and started pouring them all a drink. "I know you don't wanna stay long, none of us do, so I'm gonna cut to the chase," he mumbled and the way he'd planned to tell them suddenly didn't sound good in his head anymore and he could almost hear them all demanding more answers, details, closure. He was clinging to the hope that they all hated the old man too much to care, but now that hope seemed futile somehow. "Someone came to see me. Someone who went missing with dad." He licked his lips, then downed his drink in one gulp, setting the glass down before pouring himself some more. "He's not coming back." It had all been more nuanced in his head, a story that made sense, something about not wanting to tell them who had told him this because they were dealing with their own trauma and the Lucas clan wasn't exactly known for its kindness but... Why mince words? "He's dead."
Kat turned to glare at Caden as if his presence alone was offending her, but didn’t get a word in before Gavin returned. Worry began to eat at her the second he started pouring them drinks, his tone indicating that this was not something they were all going to toast over, whatever it was, which quickly followed. Kat’s mouth hung open in surprise, her brain having to play catch up as he laid everything out on the table. She’d assumed that their father was either dead or not coming back, but hadn’t expected that to be confirmed. She’d never had a good relationship with him and tended to blame him for every single issue she had, but actually hearing that he was dead was still a shock. “So—So who came to see you? How did he die? Did they, like, see it happen? Or are they just assuming that because everyone else came back and he didn’t?” She was fine with putting him to rest and moving on, but the last thing she wanted was for him to pop up again in a month just to prove them wrong.
Aaron had accepted the drink poured for him, but he didn’t drink it, not yet. As soon as Gavin said ‘dad,’ his heart doubled in speed and he had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep his expression neutral. He would not look at Caden, he wouldn’t, he wouldn’t. Gavin went on with the brevity that he was famous for, and Aaron’s stomach clenched, even though he was halfway expecting those words. Jasper had reached out to him and Caden, to fill them in on what he’d told Gavin. He’d left their involvement out of it, thankfully ... at least as far as they knew. Jasper’s conscience had obviously gotten the better of him, what if he eventually confessed that his story wasn’t the truth? Aaron supposed they would have to cross that bridge when they came to it. He kept his mouth shut and his eyes on Gavin while Kat asked her questions.
Like Aaron, Caden took his glass but didn't take a drink. Instead, he stared at Gavin, waiting for whatever bomb his brother was about to drop on them. When it landed, it was more like a pitiful thud than an explosion. He glanced briefly at Aaron, who was pointedly avoiding his gaze. It made sense that Gavin would want to tell them the news. He had no idea what the truth was and it probably needed to stay that way. "Does it matter?" he asked Kat, after she had bombarded Gavin with her questions. "If he's dead, he's dead. And good riddance." He lifted his glass in a mock salute before downing it in one gulp and setting the glass back down. "I don't want to know who told you and I don't want to know how he died. All I need to know is that he's gone."
Their reactions could have been scripted, Gavin wasn't surprised by any of them. His fiery sister freaking out, Aaron going dumbstruck and Caden being Caden. For the first time ever it was Caden's reaction he'd most hoped for and he shrugged and nodded along, tilting his head this way and that. "I don't wanna put that person through more grief, they told me so I could give the family closure, that's done with. Now we just- we gotta tell mom." His eyes automatically sought out Kat even if on some level he knew it had to come from him. He didn't really think his sister would be better at delivering the news but he just didn't want to do it himself. He realized he was trying to be avoidant though and it wasn't fair, so he didn't let his gaze linger. "It's gonna be hard on her, not having a body to bury."
“I just want to make sure he’s really dead,” Kat said. “People around here come back, and while that’s worked out well for the most part, you probably don’t want him showing up in the bar in a couple of months, demanding a drink.” She didn’t understand all the secrecy of the matter. She couldn’t say she loved her father, but she felt like they were owed more than what they’d been given. Their mother would definitely want to know more, but when Gavin looked towards her, she avoided meeting his eyes. If he wasn’t going to provide her with the information he had, then he could deliver that news himself. It would just come back to him anyways, once their mom realized Gavin was the only one who could answer her questions. “Maybe… but at least she won’t have the expense of a funeral.” It was probably callous to say, but they all knew it was true.
Aaron had occasionally been in awe of Caden’s ability to lie, and now was one of those times. He sounded completely natural, with his usual asshole attitude, just stating facts. Caden didn’t want to know. But he did know the real truth, and he knew how Joseph had died because he’d seen it happen, and it had been horrific. It made Aaron want to hug him, even though he knew it wouldn’t be welcome in any way. He felt a pang of something deep and melancholy that none of them seemed grief-stricken or even sad that Joseph Lucas was dead. He thought of their father’s body, rotting out in the woods in an unmarked grave he wasn’t even sure he could find again, instead of in a coffin with their mother crying over it. Aaron knocked his drink back and swallowed. “Dunno if there’s any way we can be sure,” he said, glancing at his sister. “Who even understands that place? But if somebody said they saw him die, then ... that’s what we got. I’ll go with you, Gav. To tell Mom.”
"Mom'll be better off," Caden said with a shrug. "She might even be relieved, even if she doesn't show it. And if he comes back, we'll handle it." But Joseph wasn't coming back. Jasper had made sure of that. There was a sick part of Caden that felt the urge to drive back out to the woods, just to make sure his dad was still buried. But the old man was gone and they all needed to accept it and move on. It was no big loss to them. Or anyone, really. Not even their mother.
Never in a million years would Gavin have thought he'd appreciate Caden's reaction far more than Kat's though he couldn't fault her for asking the tough questions, for the time being he was just glad his brothers seemed to have his back on this one. "Aaron and I will tell mom," he said and that was probably best. Aaron and Kat were the babies of the family, their mother would react less harshly than if Gavin came alone and that was just the fact of it. She was never mean like Joseph but she'd done her own damage to her kids when they were growing up, laying on the catholic guilt and ignoring her husband's blatant abuse. Gavin had no doubt she was going to make this hard on him in some way or another but Aaron would make a good buffer. "I've said all I can say about it, I made a promise."
It was shocking to Kat that her brothers didn’t need to know more, that they were okay with their father being gone and leaving it at that. He’d been a shitty dad, and probably an even worse husband, but it felt weird to just write him off as gone. Dead. Abandoned in some other world. She couldn’t even remember the last time she’d seen her dad, or what she’d said to him last. They didn’t talk on the phone. She only saw him when she saw her mother, and she’d generally avoided him if she could. It was weird, but going up against all three of her brothers wasn’t something Kat did often and this just didn’t seem worth it. “Fine,” Kat said. “If you’re all… good with that, then… I am too.”
Kat’s tone said it wasn’t fine at all, and Aaron felt for her. He and Caden knew the full truth, and Gavin knew part of it now, but she was more or less completely in the dark. It made him wish he could tell her everything he knew, but Aaron knew that couldn’t happen. Kat was a Lucas, but she was more delicate by nature than the rest of them. She might not be able to handle the truth, or keep it from Gavin. As always, their family was all tangled up with secrets. Aaron slid off of the counter onto his feet and reached out to touch his sister’s arm. “Don’t think anybody’s good with it,” he murmured. “We should just ... be grateful that we got some news out of that place. And that it gave Jasper back, right?” Aaron glanced at his brothers.
Caden was good with it, but it was probably better to not say so. Joseph had been his dad, but he had been a shitty one. To him, to Gavin... to Aaron and Kat too, just in a less violent way. Why should they mourn him? Why should shitty people be memorialized in any way? Caden nodded at Aaron, because he was eager to finish this damn thing and go home. "Jasper's back. I'll take him over the old man any day of the week. We'll do whatever mom wants to do, but... we're done with dad. At least I am."
Gavin was both relieved and not with the way Kat yielded. He was glad she did, yes, but it also made him feel even more guilty, that slightly subdued tone of her voice. "I'm sure she'll want a memorial," he mumbled and his chest felt too heavy, grief lacing through him like dry grass catching fire. Along with it came anger because Joseph didn't deserve his grief, and yet it was there, weighing him down, making his throat feel tight. "We can act like we give a shit for a day, right? For mom?" It might be insane but Bridget had loved her husband, or at least convinced herself that she did. It was dysfunctional and tragic but oh so common.
“Sure. What’s one more day?” Kat sighed, rubbing her hands over her face. She’d been faking it for her mom for as long as she could remember. Getting through a funeral should be a breeze. She didn’t have to fake happiness, or even pretend that everything was okay, because it wasn’t. She could even be distant and no one would fault her, so long as they didn’t expect her to cry. The only thing worth mourning was the fact that they’d never had a father that really loved them. She had her brothers, and they were fantastic, but not once had she ever felt like she’d earned her father’s affection. As much as she told herself she didn’t need it or want it, it was a feeling she’d chased everywhere else, always striving to be good enough, but somehow falling short.
It would be hard on their Catholic mom to not have a body to bury -- at least not one that she knew of -- and Aaron was sure Gavin was right and Bridget would want a funeral of some kind. Aaron thought he could get through that, and his siblings would keep their stiff upper lips, and everything would get buried in a different way, yet again. Like the rest of them, he wasn’t too sad about losing Joseph as the man he’d been, but more sad about the potential of ever having a loving father. It had probably been too late for that, though, even before Joseph had taken his last breath. They’d been mourning their father for years. “We’ll keep you guys updated,” he murmured, glancing between Kat and Caden. Since he was going with Gavin, he assumed he would be involved in planning whatever this memorial would end up being.
It was hard for Caden to pretend to give a shit on a good day, let alone at some bullshit memorial for his dad. But he would try, just to put this whole thing to bed and move on. There was a part of him that hoped his mother would just want a headstone and they wouldn't have to do all the shit that came with an actual funeral, but given her upbringing, he was resigned to the fact that it probably wouldn't happen that way. "Are we done?" Caden asked, pulling his keys from his jacket pocket. He was ready to leave and get some distance between himself and his siblings for a while. They would all be together again, sooner rather than later.
"Yeah, we're done," Gavin replied and he saw no reason for this to take longer than necessary. He hadn't wanted to tell them individually, mainly because he didn't want to have to repeat the damn lie three times but he'd also made the right call in that Caden would inadvertently have his back against Kat's questions. It had been a gamble, his brothers might have been more adamant about finding out who had told him, maybe even suspecting foul play. It had nothing to do with avenging their father, Joseph didn't deserve an ounce of sympathy, but Gavin could easily imagine it as some misguided way to vent some rage that had been decades in the making. Thankfully it seemed to be working just as he'd hoped, they were letting it go. The hardest part would be telling his mother and if Aaron didn't go with him, he wasn't so sure he could lie to her face for long. But now he had to. This was a good thing, Bridget could never know the truth. "Caden," he started, but damn if he wasn't too tired to talk to him about his new wife right now. He sighed, shook his head and waved him off. "We'll talk tomorrow."
Kat sighed and picked up her drink, downing the contents in one go. It didn’t feel right not to have a body, or to have real, solid answers, but she didn’t think she was going to get them here. Maybe she needed to talk to someone who was over there, in that other place. Not Jasper—she wouldn’t put him through that—but she knew there had been others. If Joseph had been killed over there, someone must have seen it happen. She didn’t blame her brothers for not wanting to know, but that wasn’t the way she rolled. With Gavin and Aaron taking off to talk to their mom, Kat supposed there was no reason to hang around. She wanted to give Caden a piece of her mind, but now wasn’t the time. “Let me know how it goes,” she told them, a touch of guilt sinking in for not going with them, but if their mom had questions, she knew she’d only make things worse.
The talk with Bridget would have to happen later, given the late hour, and Aaron was already dreading it, but he knew it had to be done, and it wasn’t fair to make Gavin do it alone. Caden would be no help, mothers and daughters always seemed to have a complicated relationship, so as Bridget’s baby boy, Aaron was the best choice. He just hoped he could lie well enough to soften the blow for her. “We will,” Aaron said to Kat, still dutifully ignoring Caden. They were the only ones in the room who knew the real story, and he couldn’t be the one to fuck that up. Aaron moved closer to his sister to give her a hug, squeezing tight for a moment before he let go. She was the only one in the room getting this news for the first time, and he felt for her. It was a nasty shock, no matter how they all felt about Joseph.
The best thing to do right now would be for all four of them to separate and leave. Caden wasn't wholly convinced that Aaron could keep this secret, but then, he'd been keeping it since January, so maybe Caden really didn't have to worry about his brother blowing up this entire thing. It was a heavy secret for them to bear, but it was what it was. Caden glanced at Gavin, bracing himself for more, but then his brother appeared to dismiss whatever it was he was going to say. Which was a relief because Caden was in no mood to talk about Shan tonight, assuming that was where Gavin's mind had gone. Caden was already exhausted just talking about Joseph, he didn't need more bullshit piled up on top of that. "G'night," he muttered, saluting his siblings before turning to head for the back door.
Gavin let him leave, he'd said his piece, but he moved over to Kat and patted her shoulder gently when Aaron had let go. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, looking between her and Aaron. "He was-" a shit dad? A horrible human being? Still their father? It all sounded meaningless in his head, didn't even touch on all the complicated feelings welling up in his chest whenever he thought about Joseph so he just shook his head and lowered his gaze, letting the silence do the talking.
“He was the only dad we ever had,” Kat sighed. “He sucked at it. I’ve spent most of my adult life hating him. But it still feels weird that he’s just gone.” She hated that she cared. No matter what she did, she’d never been good enough for him. There’d always been a reason to yell and belittle, and Kat’s reaction was to yell right back or just leave. He’d been a huge part of the reason she’d left Point Pleasant in the first place, needing to put more distance between herself and him. It felt appropriate that she’d only come home once he was gone. “If you need any help making arrangements, let me know. You don’t need to take it all on yourself.”
Aaron had said “goodnight” to Caden’s retreating back, then turned to his other two siblings. It didn’t escape him that they saved any real comfort for each other until after Caden left. As much as Aaron wanted to hug him until they both had no choice but to cry, he knew that wouldn’t be welcome, so he focused on Gavin and Kat. Aaron nodded a bit -- it did feel weird that Joseph was gone, and even more weird that he knew what had really happened. He just had to be careful and not talk too much. “He definitely sucked at it,” he agreed. Aaron put one hand on Gavin’s shoulder and squeezed firmly. “Sorry you had to be the one to tell us,” he murmured. “But we’re both here to help.”
For a split second, Gavin felt tempted to tell them the truth now that it was just the three of them and things felt softer somehow. There was a small part of him that really wanted to let them know the real weight of the news and not have to carry it by himself. The fact that Jasper had caused Joseph's death weighed heavier on him than the fact that he was dead and it made him wish time and time again that he'd killed the old man a long time ago to spare his son the burden. "Thanks," he mumbled, swallowing down a lump in his throat and at least he'd already cried, he didn't intend to cry over his old man twice. "Did you guys have any good moments with him? Any good memories?"
There was one moment that came to mind for Kat, a memory that she almost wished she didn’t have. It would make things easier if the answer was no, that everything had been horrible and they were lucky he was finally gone. But there’d been moments when she’d thought maybe he could be the kind of father she wanted him to be, and those had given her the worst kind of hope—hope for something that was never, ever going to happen. “There was a time, I was maybe five or six, that I remember sitting with him on the couch and watching a football game. We were winning, so he was in a good mood. He told me how the game was played, and asked me to go grab him a beer.” Kat swiped at her eyes, pissed off that her father could draw that much emotion out of her just by being decent. She’d wanted him to be so much more than he ever was and had clung to even the smallest bit of affection like she was starved for it.
How fucking sad was it that was the best Kat could think of? Doing something Joseph wanted to do and would’ve been doing anyway, then getting him another damn beer so he would stay in a good mood. What if child-Kat had been bored and restlessly gotten in the way of the TV? Aaron was sure that Joseph would’ve gotten pissed at her, maybe shoved her around a bit to “teach her a lesson.” It made Aaron feel sick and angry deep in the pit of his stomach, and he silently vowed yet again to be a better father than his own could’ve ever dreamed of being. He wanted his baby girl to overflow with good memories with him. Aaron’s eyes were suddenly watery and he wiped at them with his wrist. “He came to a few of my games,” he muttered. No good memories since high school football? That sounded about right. “I think he told me ‘good job’ a couple of times ... fuck.” Aaron’s breath hitched and he turned to where Gavin had left the bottle on the counter to pour himself another shot.
That solidified what Gavin had been afraid of; that his younger siblings had missed out completely on what little Joseph had to give. "There were moments," he said quietly. "Before he realized he didn't want to be a dad. He tried with me, a little bit." Yet all he could think about now was the violence and how Joseph likely behaved at Aaron's games. "No big loss," he sighed. "He should have been better. He had plenty of chances to be better." So did he, Gavin realized, and he'd been trying lately, being there for his kids, actually talking to them. He was awkward at it still but at least he was trying. When was the last time Joseph had said a kind word to any of them?
Kat knew she’d probably have a good cry later, though she couldn’t explain why. Joseph had never been the father she wanted or needed, and what hurt the most was that he hadn’t even tried. By the time Kat was born, he didn’t even make an effort and as an adult she knew that. As a child, she hadn’t understood, and she vowed that she would never allow a child of hers to feel the same way. If she ever had one. It turned out that finding a man that didn’t resemble her father in some way was harder than it should be. She took a deep breath, then exhaled. “He won’t be missed. Even if Mom’s upset, I think she’ll be so much better for it.”
No big loss. Those words in particular rang hollow. It was a big loss, maybe one of the biggest, but it was a loss they’d felt for the majority of their lives. The grief was more about the potential than the man himself, and even if Aaron didn’t have the words for it, he knew that somewhere. Joseph would never see the light and turn his life around, never make amends, never try to love them for who they were. Maybe he never would’ve done any of that anyway, but he’d at least had a chance while he was alive. Now there was nothing but the still-echoing pain he left behind. It was so hard to love and hate someone so much at the same time, and Aaron bitterly hoped his death had been painful, because God knew he’d hurt all of them plenty. Otherwise he’d just gotten away with it all, consequence-free. “We’re all better for it,” he muttered. Maybe except for Jasper, but Aaron wasn’t supposed to know that. He put the bottle down and looked at Gavin. “I’m going home ... ‘less you need anything else for closing?”
Gavin got a painful pang at Aaron's words because he knew about Jasper, even if he didn't know the whole truth. Jasper was not better for it, he was falling apart and Gavin had no idea how to help him. If only this damn story was true, if only he could make Jasper believe he'd had nothing to do with the old man's death. He had a flicker of a thought about the witches and their abilities to erase memories but that idea came with so much darkness and fear; he'd never take another risk like that, especially not when it came to his kids. "Go home," he said quietly. "We're almost done here, I can finish up. We can tell mom tomorrow... Or the day after."
Going home to an empty house seemed absolutely dreadful to Kat, but if they were leaving, there wasn’t much reason to hang around. She idly wondered if Dragonfly was open past midnight on a Tuesday night, but decided her own liquor cabinet was a better idea. That way she could just pass out when she felt like it and not have to worry about how she was going to get back home afterwards. It was probably a depressing way to end the night, but it didn’t really feel like it could get much worse. “Kay,” she sighed, picking up her bag and slinging it over her shoulder. “Night, guys.” She felt like she should say more, that they would talk soon, but she just didn’t have the energy. Hopefully they knew where to find her if they needed her.