Who: Bash and Phee When: afternoon, Wednesday, Jan 17th Where: the McCarthy home Status: complete
Phee had a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach as soon as she woke up Wednesday morning. It had lingered through her getting ready for school, and she’d dimly thought maybe getting a ride in with Greg would help, but it didn’t. It lasted all day long, and by the time she was on her way back home, Phee felt jumpy and tired, her nerves frayed with the sensation that some horrible other shoe was going to drop somewhere. Nothing about the day had been weird or ominous -- besides passing down one of the hallways that she’d been in with Jules when they’d been in that other place. But Phee had gotten chills passing down those since it had happened.
She kissed Greg goodbye and went into the house. Phee had tried various things to try and make herself feel better, thinking that maybe school was an impossible environment to improve one’s mood. She wrote some more in her grimoire, she communed with the plants in her room, but nothing really helped. Finally, she emerged and started off to find her brother. If he didn’t have any advice, maybe he could at least be distracting.
Sebastian had spent the day looking for something, anything, that could distract him from the feeling that something horrible was about to happen. He’d attempted to goof off with the guys during lunch, but still couldn’t shake it, so he’d skipped out on history to get high behind the school. That should have made him chill, but instead he’d felt even more paranoid and had proceeded to burn his hand to the point of blistering, just to make sure Baron wasn’t back. He hadn’t heard her voice in his head, but he knew she could be quiet. The bitch had sat silently for weeks before making her move. But he still burned, the pain a weird relief compared to the alternative. When Chloe approached him again after school, he decided to hell with it all, why not take her to the dance? She proved a momentary distraction, but it didn’t last. As soon as he was home again, it was back.
He couldn’t do homework even if he tried, so he’d settled in the game room to zone out on video games. It was mostly working, though now he regretted burning his hand as bad as he had. Every once and a while the heat got to him and he put fresh ice on it, hoping that would help. He glanced to the side as the door opened, but didn’t immediately pause the game when he saw it was Ophelia. “Hey,” he said, eyes on the screen. “What’s up?”
Even in a fairly big house, Bash wasn’t difficult to find. They tended to lounge in the same two or three spots, and the game room was the second place she went. Phee walked in and flopped herself on one of the couches, looking at what he was playing for a couple of heartbeats before she looked at his profile. “Hey,” she echoed. Phee considered some pleasantries, but the sour feeling in her stomach told her to skip those. “Do you feel fucked up today?” she asked. Normally she wouldn’t have really dumped her mood onto her brother, but there was something really off about how she was feeling. It felt ... bigger than her. Or maybe she was crazy and paranoid, but she at least trusted Bash to tell her so if that was the case. “Like something bad’s about to happen?”
Sebastian could usually hold a conversation while playing, but what Ophelia asked deserved his full attention. He hit pause and looked at her, trying to figure out if there was a ‘too’ silently tacked on to the end of that question. He didn’t think he was that easy to read, but it also wouldn’t surprise him if everyone had him figured out except himself. “Yeah,” he sighed. “Like… I keep thinking Baron is back. She’s not! But… something’s off.” And it was making him feel a little bit crazy, so he’d immersed himself in video games. It felt like a better decision than calling up Logan, though the guy was a bad decision he usually enjoyed. “I thought it was just me.” But if Phee was experiencing it as well, maybe that would help settle his mind. It wasn’t an answer, but it was better than being alone with the feeling.
Phee hadn’t even considered that this might make Bash’s anxiety about Baron worse, but that made immediate sense to her and she felt bad. She shook her head and lifted a hand to run the fingers through her hair. “Not just you,” she murmured, and sighed. “But that definitely means it’s not Baron, right? So that’s a good thing.” Phee wrinkled her nose a bit. It was a good thing, but it was hard to feel like there was anything positive related to the feeling that had plagued her all day. Her and her brother, apparently. “I wonder like, what it means. ‘Cause I mean, it was there when I woke up and didn’t let up all day. Same for you?” Her eyes drifted down to Bash’s hands and she frowned a tiny bit at the bandage on one of them. “You okay?”
“Yeah, I just went a little overboard,” Sebastian said, lightly touching his injured hand. He’d wrapped it and put ice on it, but the only healing salve he knew was the one Baron had guided him through and he refused to let her help him, especially now. “But I know for sure it’s not Baron. At least, I’m not possessed by her.” That didn’t mean she wasn’t sulking around the graveyard causing destruction, but he wasn’t near as worried about that. He could steer clear of the cemetery. “It’s been all day. From the moment I woke up. I kept trying to shake it, but…” He frowned as he shrugged, too tired to put on the smile and fake it for his sister, especially if she was feeling the same way. He knew the extremes that he’d gone to to try and escape it and wondered what she’d done herself. Probably something smarter than skipping class and getting high. “I wish I knew what it was. I feel like… we’re in danger.” It was a feeling that was becoming all too common these days. It used to scare him, but it was starting to piss him off.
She wanted to ask what exactly he’d gone overboard on, but he didn’t offer the information and it could’ve been anything. Her brother was an athlete, after all, and they were always getting hurt in some form or fashion. What he was saying was more important to her at the moment. She definitely wasn’t trying to put a happy face on this herself, so she was glad Sebastian wasn’t either. It definitely didn’t feel good, whatever it was. “Yeah, same for me,” she murmured, burying her fingers in her hair again. “All day long, feels like there’s some threat looming somewhere ... but I’m glad it’s not just me. I wonder though ... I wonder if it’s just us? Maybe I should text Liam.” Phee nibbled on her bottom lip and pulled her phone out of her hoodie pocket, but got a little stuck on what to ask. It was easier to ask Bash ‘do you feel fucked up’ than someone else. “Greg seemed fine, but ... that’s Greg.”
It was a relief that Ophelia didn’t inquire further about what he’d done to his hand because he didn’t want to worry her. It wasn’t like it was self harm--he didn’t do it to feel better, he did it to make sure he wasn’t possessed. It felt like a legitimate concern after the past few weeks and he’d survive. The day had just driven him a little crazy. “Ask him,” Sebastian said. “If he’s not feeling the same way, it’s easy to write off. But it’d be nice to know if it’s witches or just us.” He didn’t want to think that this was a family thing, but anything seemed possible. “Greg’s always fine,” he said, lips twitching up a bit. “Even when he’s not, he kind of just seems to roll pass it and move on.” Sebastian used to think he bounced back easily too, but lately he’d struggled with it.
Twisting and nibbling at her lips, Phee composed a text to send to Liam -- felt magically weird today, Bash too ... you? Okay so maybe it wasn’t that complex, but she didn’t want to worry him that something else bad was happening to everyone, just in case it really wasn’t, so she put some thought into it. Phee wasn't sure if she hoped the answer was positive or negative. She sighed and rubbed at her eyes when she put her phone down. “Well, he like, wants to get a gun to keep on him now, so I dunno how well he’s rolling,” she said. She was aware that Greg might not want everyone to know that, but this was Sebastian, and the gun thing did really worry her. They weren’t a gun family, even if she knew a lot of people had them around here. “He is really good at acting fine, though. Like other people I know.” Phee gave him a wan smile and reached her foot over to nudge his knee.
“He wants to get a gun?” Sebastian asked, his eyes widening in surprise. It was the first he’d heard of it and it caused concern to rush through him. Things had been bad on his end, and Jules for sure, but he hadn’t realized how that might be affecting Greg. It also made him wonder if there were more things going on that he didn’t know about. Maybe Greg didn’t want to tell him because he knew how Bash would react, but a gun felt extreme. It also felt useless. He was pretty sure nothing he’d faced in the past few weeks could have been helped with a gun. “If he’s really serious about it, let me know? I didn’t realize things were that bad. We should probably put up wards at his house and set him up with hex bags, just in case. I know it’s not much, but he shouldn’t feel defenseless.” Which was probably where this was coming from, now that he thought about it. Sebastian knew the feeling.
“Oh he’s serious,” Phee said, pursing her lips to one side. Her phone chimed then with a message back from Liam -- yes. But not in a good way. More like doomed. Mom too. We were just talking about it. Can i call you later? Mom’s still here -- and Phee was distracted for a few seconds with a reply that he could of course call her later. She focused on her brother again. “Liam has had the same sense of doom today,” she told Sebastian. “His mom too. So it’s not just us. I wonder if Mom and Dad have felt it too.” She nibbled on her lip, then nodded. “But yeah, um ... wards at Greg’s house would probably be a good idea, if we can do them. With everything and what happened to Jules and then me and Jules, he’s kinda freaked out. Which like, I understand. But I don’t think a gun will help against fucking ... portals and giant fog beasts and stuff.”
“Shit,” Sebastian muttered and rubbed his hands over his face, something he immediately regretted as a pain blossomed in his palm. Placing his hands together, he iced the injured hand up, then took a deep breath. “If we can make him feel safe, maybe he won’t, I dunno, shoot someone or something.” Though he hadn’t seen what the portals could do, he imagined it must be something horrible if Greg felt like he needed to arm himself. He could only imagine how Jules must feel. Probably like a danger to herself. That was something he could relate to, at least on some level. “Mom’s just been weird lately. I dunno if I want to bring her into this. You could ask dad though.” He wasn’t sure he could tell his father about what he was feeling without causing concern, whereas James might listen to Phee.
Phee had experienced first-hand how fucking scary portals could be now, and she didn’t blame Greg for wanting some sort of protection. She just wasn’t sure that a pistol would be any protection. Remembering the way the thing in the mist had moved gave Phee and unpleasant chill. And the smell, ugh. She was still having bad dreams about it. But other people had bigger problems than that, so she didn’t want to complain about it. “Yeah, she has been weird,” she agreed, her brow furrowing a bit. “Jules was asking me about that actually. ‘Cause Jasper Lucas got hurt in the fog too, you know? And he’s been acting weird, she said. Like super moody. So ... I dunno, maybe that’s something else to talk to Dad about too.” She nibbled on her bottom lip again, aware she would have to be the one to do that. Sebastian and their dad weren’t communicating well lately.
Sebastian almost said that Jasper Lucas was always moody, but he didn’t think Jules would have said such a thing if it was the norm. And if he was moody like their mom was, then… Bash was surprised Jules would even stick around. Except Bash knew she loved Jasper and sometimes people in love put up with a lot of bullshit. “Should we… be worried?” he asked, feeling out of his element again. It was one thing for their mom to act weird, but if it was because of the creature in the fog, and Jasper was feeling it too, this felt bigger than anything he knew how to handle. “When were you talking to Jules?” he asked, the thought suddenly occurring to him. If Jules had wanted to know about their mom, wouldn’t she have asked him? He wasn’t trying to be possessive, but he kind of considered Jules his friend, not Phee’s.
“I don’t know,” Phee murmured quietly. It was the most honest answer -- she was worried, but she didn’t know if she ought to be or not. Jules seemed to think something was happening, but a lot of Phee didn’t want to acknowledge that was possible. Hadn’t they been dealing with enough shit already? It wasn’t a possession, if it was happening to multiple people at the same time, but maybe it was something even worse. She blinked a bit at Bash’s question, thinking she’d told him about it already ... only maybe she hadn’t. When she’d recounted that day, the whole Being Transported Into Another Dimension had kind of taken precedence in her brain. “Oh, uh ... right before the whole ... thing happened. That was why she was talking to me at all, asking about mom. I thought it was super weird, but then shit got really weird, I guess I forgot to mention it.”
“Oh… okay,” Sebastian muttered, his brows drawn together and lips turned down. With all that was going on, he knew he was focused on the wrong thing, but he felt out of the loop on so much. His friends were falling apart and he felt like he was only hearing about it after the fact. But it wasn’t like they were leaving him out. Jules wasn’t opening portals on purpose. And it wasn’t like Greg had actually bought a gun. He was just thinking about it. He was allowed to tell his girlfriend things and not tell his best friend. And yet Bash was bitter, then annoyed at his own stupid feelings. He needed to get his priorities straight. “We need a break,” he sighed. “I feel like the last couple of weeks have just been shit. No wonder Trip didn’t wanna come home.”
Sebastian might not have said any of that out loud, but Phee had always been pretty in tune with her brother, and she had her own sensitivity to feeling left out of things. Granted, she didn’t have nearly as many friends as Bash to leave her out, but still. It was a little strange that Jules had come to her and not him to ask questions, but maybe she’d just thought Bash was dealing with too much already. And maybe she was right. Phee didn’t know. Then there was the stuff with Greg ... “We need a break like, on the other side of the world,” she agreed with an eye roll and a sigh. Then Phee focused on him again with her own little frown. “You okay though? That was an upset face you just made.”
“It’s nothing,” Sebastian said. His knee-jerk reaction was almost always to dismiss any negative feelings when asked about them, but Phee was likely to know he was lying. As his sister, she could read him better than most and he wasn’t feeling top of his game today. “I just wonder… why she didn’t ask me? Or why Greg hasn’t said anything to me? You think they don’t trust me?” It was a bad rabbit hole to go down, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. He felt left out of things he shouldn’t even want to be a part of. He should count himself lucky. Instead, he just wanted to relate. They’d all experienced something horrific but similar, whereas the only person who’d gone through anything remotely like he had had moved all the way across the country. Maybe they were worried he was still possessed. Sebastian couldn’t blame them. His throbbing hand was evidence that he worried just the same.
Phee did know the first part was bullshit, and she just had to wait it out until he was honest with her. Which wasn’t very long this time, so that was good. She wanted him to trust her and feel like he could talk to her, even if she couldn’t do much for him. They were siblings, he’d always been her closest brother, and she felt like they understood each other better than most. Her furrowed expression deepened a bit as he asked those questions, and she nibbled some more on her bottom lip. “No, I don’t think it’s a mistrust thing,” Phee told him first, since that was pretty important. “I can’t speak much for Jules, you know her better than I do, but I think like ... they know you’ve been through some scary shit lately and they don’t want to pile more scary shit on top of you? I think they’re just trying to give you a break. At least Greg is. And hell, maybe Jules was looking for either one of us and just saw me first, I dunno.” She wasn’t trying to be dismissive of his worries, her tone was soft and thoughtful, she just wanted him to feel better in general.
It was a good explanation and one Sebastian wanted to buy into. He didn’t like the idea that they’d left him out on purpose, but if they had then it softened the blow if it was for his own protection. He could understand that, even if he’d rather be included. Most days he could compartmentalize things, tuck away the bad as if it had never happened, but on days like today it just kept creeping back into his mind and poisoning his thoughts. Distractions weren’t working today and maybe his brain just wanted to latch on to every negative thought he could possibly have. “I just don’t want them to think I’m, like, fragile now. They listen to all my bullshit. It should go both ways.” And if it didn’t, maybe he really needed to work on keeping his crazy to himself.
She could practically see Sebastian’s mental gears turning, and Phee wished she could give his brain a hug. They were a family of overthinkers, and both of them had been trying hard to keep their parents happy, which had kind of trained them to Not Have Problems Out Loud. Phee didn’t fully understand how all of it tied together, but their family issues were becoming more and more apparent as things continued to be hard. She hadn’t even told either parent about her little adventure into another dimension, but she’d told Bash because she trusted him to believe and comfort her about it, and he had. She just wished she could do the same for him. “Well your ‘bullshit’ as you call it was kind of ... really bad. The worst among us until recently, I think, so ... maybe it’s okay to be a little fragile?” she suggested. “Talk to them about it if you want to, I just think they’re trying to help and not be burdens themselves, you know? Nobody wants to make things harder on anybody else.”
“I just don’t want them to think I’m weak,” Sebastian sighed, since that was what it all came back to. He’d never worried about his friends as much as his father, but that was before he’d come out, before the break-up, and, most of all, before he’d been possessed and gone through an exorcism. It was okay if this was a momentary thing, he could appreciate his friends wanting to protect him, but he didn’t want his friends to feel like they had to handle him with gloves forever. And he didn’t know how to prove to them that he was okay, probably because he wasn’t quite there yet. Sebastian rubbed his hands over his face as he tried to shake off the negative feelings both mentally and physically. “Sorry. Today is just… too much. It’s like I can’t focus on anything remotely positive. I feel like I should just go to bed and reassess everything in the morning. Assuming we feel better.”
Phee just looked at him for a moment, then nodded a bit. “Yeah, I feel that same way,” she agreed. She stood up and moved over next to where he was sitting, plopping down next to him and putting her arms around his shoulders from the side. She gave him a gentle head butt. “Nobody thinks you’re weak,” she murmured. “And neither should you. ‘Cause you’re far from it. And that’s all I’ll say.” Phee dropped her head to Sebastian’s shoulder for a moment and gave him a tight squeeze. Some days were just shitty, she understood that. This one seemed to be more so than most, there was the bad mojo in the air. Some rest would probably do everybody good; Phee was feeling like just hiding in her room herself, now that she knew it wasn’t something wrong with her specifically.
Sebastian sighed and leaned against Phee, letting his head rest against hers. He appreciated the support, but more than that, he appreciated her letting it go. The day had been so bizarre that he wasn’t even confident that he’d feel the same way tomorrow. The feeling of badness that he’d woken up with had saturated his mood with all kinds of horrible thoughts of doom and gloom, making him into a pessimist. He’d had a hard time lately, but there was no reason for today to be especially bad. It was a comfort to know he wasn’t alone, even if he wouldn’t have wished it on Phee. Sebastian exited out of the game and tilted his head a little to look in her direction. “Wanna watch something before bed? Your pick.”
It had definitely not been a normal day, and being a teenage girl, Phee could strongly relate to just not feeling like yourself some days. This one had just been particularly bad, for reasons that were outside of themselves. She was worried, but too tired and clueless to get anywhere grinding her gears over what it could be. Hopefully when Liam called he would have a few answers, but Phee wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t. For now she just wanted to lounge with her brother and try to feel better. “Um, yes please,” she said, sitting up a bit. She reached over to help herself to his game controller, pulling up the Netflix app so she could browse and find something light and funny for them. Maybe it would make going to sleep easier.