Aaron Lucas (thirdandlast) wrote in shadows_rpg, @ 2019-01-21 13:12:00 |
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Entry tags: | #november 2017, aaron, aaron x mila, mila |
Who: Aaron and Mila
When: Evening, Wednesday, November 29th
Where: Home
Status: Complete
Working a different schedule at different places meant Mila didn’t get to see Aaron as often as she once had. It wasn’t so bad now that they were living together, so they generally woke up together, and most of the time fell asleep together. Mila supposed on one hand it was a ‘blessing’ because she could do whatever she wanted without Aaron hovering. On the other hand, she wasn’t entirely sure he would notice what it was she was doing in the first place. Not to say he was neglectful or anything. Just… sometimes oblivious. It amused her as much as it frustrated her, depending on where her mind was at the time. But there were evenings that that seemed to work out where they were both off, or out of work early, and they got to eat dinner together. Mila had given up on trying to cook, considering she had nearly burned the house down the last couple of times she’d attempted it. But she had brought Thai food home and she and Aaron were eating on the couch, some mindless sitcom on the television that Mila was watching but not really paying any attention to.
Her mind was full of confusing thoughts that she was trying to sort through or ignore. But she was also thinking of Roxy, and how she might be leaving Caden sooner than later, and the shitshow that was going to create. She supposed she ought to try and figure out how Aaron would feel about it so Mila knew what to expect. Mila wasn’t talking to Gavin now that they weren’t working together anymore, and she doubted she would ever say another word to Caden if he and Roxy broke up unless she absolutely had to. So yeah, the potential was there for weirdness, at least for awhile.
“So I have a hypothetical to ask you,” Mila said after taking a small bite of one of her potstickers. “But it’s a secret hypothetical and not one you can tell anyone about.”
To Aaron, things were going pretty well. Amelia was back, so that was a big load off. Mila had a job again, and she hadn’t complained about it a lot, so it had to be going well. The bar was running smooth, and Gavin was even seeing somebody. Life was pretty good for the Lucases at the moment. He had noticed that sometimes Mila was distant or a little weird, but considering everything they’d all been through, Aaron didn’t think that was too unusual. Or maybe that was just the most comfortable thing to think.
He was feeling pretty comfortable in general at the moment, having a nice quiet evening in, complete with tasty food and comfy flannel pants and something funny on TV. He had a cheek full of pad thai when Mila started talking to him, and Aaron lifted his eyebrows questioningly at her. He chewed quickly and swallowed enough to say, “Okay ... shoot.”
"Hypothetically, if Roxy and Caden were to break up, how would you feel about that?" Apparently Mila didn't feel like giving Roxy and Caden new names, or trying to formulate some kind of background similar to Aaron's brother and her friend. It would take much longer for Aaron to understand and Mila wasn't sure she had the patience to do that tonight. This could - would - affect them all so she just needed to know where Aaron stood on things. Hypothetically, of course.
That didn’t sound very hypothetical, and Aaron’s brows inched higher. “Uh ... I mean ... bad? For them? I dunno, depends on why, I guess.” He took a swig of his drink, then went on. “Like, did she just get tired of Caden’s shit? Or was there cheating, or what?” Aaron shrugged. “Dunno why it would matter what I think anyway.” It never mattered with anything else when it came to his brothers, and he knew for sure that Caden wasn’t going to be coming to him for relationship advice or anything, so why the questions?
This was why Mila hadn't wanted to create some new story and background to get his thoughts. Because he wouldn't have all that many to begin with. But Mila loved him and she wasn't frustrated by his non-answer. Instead, she ate another potsticker, silent as she chewed and once she washed it down with a quick sip of beer, she continued. "What if Roxy was sick of his shit and just wanted to leave." She didn't think mentioning Spence would be wise, since that could be construed as cheating. And even though Aaron had cheated on multiple women in the past, somehow she had a feeling he might feel a bit defensive of Caden if Roxy did it. "Would you still be okay with it if she and I stayed friends?"
Aaron had always liked Roxy, she’d been nice to him with only a few exceptions, which was more than he could say for most people. She was far nicer than his own brother was, that was for damn sure. And he’d seen plenty of bad things that Caden had done to her, so he honestly wouldn’t blame her if she wanted to leave him. He’d been about to say so when Mila mentioned her friendship with Roxy, and Aaron gave a little scoff-laugh. “I’m not gonna tell you who to be friends with,” he assured her, shaking his head. If she’d been talking about an ex boyfriend of hers or something, his tune might be different, but Roxy was Roxy. “I mean, if she did, probably best she didn’t come around to family stuff or anything, but ... yeah, no, stay friends. You guys are close.”
Mila didn't foresee Roxy's presence at any future Lucas family gatherings, so that wasn't going to be a problem. The Lucas family rarely had family gatherings in the first place. Mila took another drink of her beer, her gaze drifting back to the television for a moment. "And hypothetically, if she decided to move out of their house while Caden was at work, would you help us with the heavy lifting?" That was really the main point here. If Aaron wasn't comfortable helping Roxy sneak out, or move, Mila was sure she could find a couple of guys to do it. She worked with some strong looking men at The Boathouse and Mila was positive bribing them with some beer and cash would be enough to get them to help out.
Aaron stared at Mila’s profile while she looked away, a bit of concern surfacing on his face. All of this definitely didn’t sound hypothetical, and he wondered a tiny bit why she was bothering to keep saying that. Roxy moving out while Caden wasn’t even home sounded kind of like a recipe for a blow-up to him, but that was probably inevitable anyway. Caden wasn’t going to be happy about this at all. “Where’s she goin’?” he asked Mila quietly. “But yeah, I’ll help.” He would do it fast and make sure Caden was at the bar so they wouldn’t get caught. He just hoped Roxy wasn’t taking the whole load of furniture or something. “You just can’t tell him I did.”
Again, it didn't seem wise to mention Spence, so Mila shrugged, her gaze ticking back to Aaron. Maybe she ought to suggest Roxy not move into another man's apartment so quickly. Surely there were affordable options somewhere. At least for a temporary stay. "I wouldn't tell him a thing," Mila said. "But he'll probably ask questions once she's gone, and if he does, I'll make sure he knows you didn't know anything. I told Roxy I'd be there when she tells him, so... it'll be fine." It probably wouldn't be, but that was okay. Mila wasn't sure Roxy could handle it, but Mila felt like she could. Why, she didn't really know. The feeling was there, twisting in her gut.
Aaron frowned a little. It made sense that Roxy would want someone there with her when she told Caden, but he didn’t like the idea of it just being Mila. He felt like there should be another man present, because Caden had an explosive temper, and the last thing Aaron wanted was either of the girls to get hurt. Maybe his brother wouldn’t get violent with a witness, but Aaron didn’t know that for sure. “You want me to come too?” he asked Mila. “Or be nearby at least?” He knew Caden would rant and rave about him being a traitor if he knew Aaron was involved, but it would be more than worth it to protect his girl.
"If you're there, even nearby, he might see and know you knew something," Mila pointed out. "I'll have my phone, so if something happens I'll call you. But who knows, maybe it won't be so bad. I guess I just wanted to make sure this wouldn't be weird for you if it happened. Or when it happens. I don't want to put you in the middle of anything, though personally I think you could kick Caden's ass if you really wanted to." She pierced another potsticker with her plastic fork. "It's not like he wouldn't deserve it after everything."
“If it’s putting you in a position where he might hurt you, I don’t give a flying fuck what he knows,” Aaron said, an edge in his voice. He would kick Caden’s ass if he laid a finger on Mila, there was no question in his mind about that. “I just didn’t wanna listen to his bullshit mouth if I didn’t have to. But if you want me there, I’ll be there.” Aaron couldn’t really speak to what Caden did or didn’t deserve ... he knew his brother was a piece of shit to Roxy sometimes, but she did stay with him, so it wasn’t all Caden’s fault. They’d all had a shitty childhood and terrible role models. It sucked, but sometimes life was just like that. But be damned if Aaron let Caden hurt his woman.
Mila shook her head. "If he realizes we're there he might think we're ganging up on him and it'll make things worse. I think it'll be okay but I'll definitely call you if things go south." Not that she really cared what Caden thought or felt and she doubted Aaron did either. It was possible Roxy might feel better having another man there, but Mila wasn't sure. She reached for her beer. "Roxy will probably have to find another job. Well, not probably, she'll definitely have to find another job. I'm kind of hoping she has everything in place before actually leaving. Otherwise Caden can make it difficult on her. It just sucks all around. I don't know why some guys have to be such assholes."
Aaron nodded a bit; he wasn’t going to insist on being there, even if he knew it would make him feel better about the whole situation. Still, he would make sure to stick close to home that day, just in case. “I’m sure she’ll find something and figure it all out,” Aaron murmured, thinking that Gavin was going to be upset about losing another server. Especially one as good as Roxy. It was too bad. And they’d given him shit about dating one of the girls, it hadn’t been him who ran off Mila and Roxy. “I dunno either though. Our dad just ... well, it’s no excuse anyway.” Aaron brushed his own comment off and shrugged. “That’s just Caden. S’just too bad he’s fuckin’ up the best thing he ever had.”
Mila would do what she could to help Roxy, though it did suck that she would have to leave her own home and job because of a break up. Five years with the same person was going to be difficult to sever completely, she had a feeling. It made her wonder if Roxy would follow through on it at all. "Your dad was an asshole... is," Mila corrected. "I guess I get it. But people still make their own choices, don't they? They can change if they really want to." Maybe. Mila tended to think some people were just bad, and there was nothing to be done about it. She took another sip of her beer, her gaze back on the television. "Some people fuck up the good things because they don't think they deserve them. Your dad made everyone feel worthless for most of their lives, it's hard to shake that off. Maybe being a closed off asshole is the best way to keep that from happening with other people."
He looked at the side of Mila’s face as she gazed at the TV, and felt a little swell of pride in his chest. She was so smart. If-and-when they ended up having kids together, Aaron hoped they inherited their mom’s brains and beauty. Really, if they were just little clones of Mila, he would call it good. “Yeah maybe,” he murmured to acknowledge what she’d said. “Still his choice, though.” Maybe it wasn’t much of one, but like she’d pointed out, everybody still had free will. Aaron leaned over to nuzzle a soft kiss to her cheek. “I’m gonna try hard not to fuck this up,” he added quietly. “You’ll tell me if I’m ever headed that way, yeah?” Aaron had no doubt that Roxy had tried to tell Caden in a million different ways, the difference was that Aaron was going to make sure his ears stayed open to it.
It was still his choice, yes. Though there was a voice in Mila's head questioning if that was always true. Was it true for her? Could she honestly say she was in complete control of the things she had been doing lately? To think otherwise was a bit too frightening so Mila pushed aside the thoughts while Aaron nuzzled her. "You couldn't be that way even if you wanted to," Mila told him simply, her voice a bit softer now than it had been talking about Caden. Then she looked at him with a touch of intensity, her hand tightening around her beer bottle. "I'm going to try and not fuck this up too. I mean, not like Caden or anything, but just... in general. I'm going to try really hard."
Aaron thought maybe he could slide down a personality slope and become like Caden ... but he’d always cared more what people thought of him than his brothers. Aaron had been eager to please as a child, and that hadn’t changed a whole lot. If you didn’t give people what they wanted, how could they love you? He looked a tiny bit confused at Mila’s suddenly strong declaration, then smiled faintly and lifted one hand to tuck a bit of hair behind her ear. “Then I think we’ll be okay,” he answered. Was that what relationships were in the end? Two people trying not to fuck it all up? Sounded about right to him. Mila was so perfect, he couldn’t imagine her doing anything that would really hurt them. “I love you,” he added, moving in to kiss her.
But what if they weren't okay? What if things never got better, but got worse? Mila realized those weren't questions she could ask Aaron because he didn't realize anything was wrong, and honestly, she didn't want to tell him either. He wouldn't know what to do, and Mila couldn't expect him to. There was no rational way to explain anything she had been experiencing. So she smiled softly and kissed him back. "I love you too," she murmured. "No matter what happens." Because so much shit could happen. "Thank you for being understanding about Roxy. I know she was worried about it."
In Aaron’s mind, they’d already been through the worst of it. At least for a while, he hoped. Their young relationship sure had been through the wringer already, he was hoping things would settle down now and be easier. As long as Mila kept loving him, he figured they could get through just about anything. And he wasn’t going to turn bad and fuck it up like Caden had. “About me?” he asked with a huffed chuckle. Aaron picked up his beer again to take a swig, then picked up his fork to finish off his food. “Nah, I know who my brother is. He’s still my brother, but he’s a dick, and if Roxy’s happier somewhere else, she should go for it.” He shrugged and stuffed his mouth full.
"I think she was just worried you'd tell Caden," Mila said. "So... just be mindful of it when you're working with him. Don't accidentally tip him off or anything. I don't know how long this will take and things could get bad if he finds out before it happens." She didn't think Aaron would purposely tell Caden a thing, but he didn't always think things through before opening his mouth. A lot of people had that problem. Still, Aaron made it sound so simple. If Roxy was happier somewhere else, go for it. It was one of Aaron's more exasperating traits, how easy Aaron made the difficult things sound... but it was also one of the things she loved most about him. Maybe she needed the optimism, especially now, when her mind kept shifting to a dark place.
Aaron nodded and murmured, “I’ll be careful.” He meant it too -- he would watch what he said. Caden was a dick, but he was a smart dick, much smarter than Aaron. He was good at figuring things out, and paid much better attention to everyone than Gavin did. Aaron would just have to put it out of his mind until it happened. Hell, maybe Roxy would even change her mind and it wouldn’t happen at all. She was the one who would have to be really careful, but Aaron was sure she knew that. He stroked his hand down Mila’s thigh. “I’m always just a phone call away,” he said, just to remind her. Aaron gave her a little smile, then nodded at her food. “You almost done?” he asked, intending to clean up after them.
Mila looked down at her food and realized she had been eating it essentially because it was there. She wasn't even sure how hungry she'd been. It seemed like lately she was only eating when Aaron was home, or if Roxy came over. "I'm done, thanks," she told him with a small smile. She figured he was asking so he could take her plate to the kitchen with his own and she offered it to him. At least there would be some leftovers for tomorrow. Mila ran her hands through her hair and sighed. "I might go take a bath. Is that okay?" She wasn't sure why she was asking, exactly, but she didn't want to just disappear on him while he was in the kitchen.
Aaron stacked their plates together and gathered up the forks and napkins and all, then leaned over to kiss Mila’s cheek before he stood up with it all. “‘Course,” he answered with a lopsided smile. Then he grinned a little more and winked. “Long as I get to come peek at you for a minute.” It was mostly teasing, but Aaron did enjoy looking at his woman naked, like any other red-blooded man. “I’ll clean up out here.” He’d been trying to be more helpful since the miscarriage and everything that came with it, aware that Mila didn’t need his mess on top of everything else she was dealing with. Aaron didn’t always think to do it right, but he tried. He headed for the kitchen.
"You can come peek for two minutes," Mila teased as she stood from the couch. While he cleaned up in the kitchen she headed for the bathroom. Since she figured Aaron would 'peek in' on her eventually, she left the door cracked rather than shutting it completely and started the bath water. Mila went through the motions of getting undressed and left her clothes in a pile on the floor. After searching through the mess on the bathroom sink, she found a hair tie and pulled her hair up into a messy bun on top of her head to keep it from getting wet. When she turned back to the tub, it was half full, steam rising from the water. Without thinking, she stepped into it and immediately felt the intense heat burn her foot. Instinct should have had her pull her foot away and adjust the temperature settings, but instead she climbed in and sunk into the water, sighing happily as it sent a shock through her and reddened her skin. The pain felt good and Mila settled back, closing her eyes as the water continued to rise. Almost instantly she drifted off, feeling herself sink down into that dark nothing that overtook her sometimes when she was alone. At least she knew if she drowned she probably wouldn't feel it.
Aaron took care of the trash in the kitchen, stuck the leftover Thai into the fridge -- he noted that Mila hadn’t eaten a lot, but that seemed pretty normal for her -- and then loaded up the dishwasher. He didn’t notice that there didn’t seem to be much hot water, his mind elsewhere. Mostly with Mila in the bathtub. It was too bad there wasn’t more room in that thing. He finished up and walked toward the bathroom, a little frown line creasing his brow as he heard the water still running. Aaron nudged the door open and stepped inside, his mouth opening to ask Mila if she was okay. It snapped shut again with a click of teeth as he saw that her eyes were closed and the tub was nearly overflowing. Aaron hurried forward to quickly twist the knob and turn it off, and he caught sight of the steam rising up from the water and how pink-red Mila’s skin looked. A dip of his fingers into it made him hiss, and he put his hand on her knee. “Mila? Hey, you okay?” he asked with soft urgency.
Mila heard his voice, felt his hand on her knee. For a second she thought he had followed her into the tunnel and was going to drag her out again. He ruined everything. But it was a different voice in her head, whispering the resentment, not her own. Mila might not have recognized it if her body had been numb to the hot water. She might have just stayed where she was, asleep in some dark corner of her mind so that whatever it was that was inside of her could deal with this problem on its own. Because it felt like Aaron was a problem who ruined it. Again. But as she roused, she could feel the burning that had settled deep in her bones and before she could help it, laughter bubbled up in her throat. Her eyes cracked open to look at him. "Everything burns," she said, though it came out sounding joyful, like a joke than the truth. Her eyes welled with tears, despite the laughter. "I can't stop it."
A chill of weirdness ran down Aaron’s spine. There was something not right about that laugh, even beyond the situation itself. But that water was fucking hot, it was hurting his hand, and Mila had her whole body in it. “Yes you can, it’s okay,” he heard himself saying breathlessly as he reached for the drain lever. Aaron hurried to flick it, then reached for Mila to sit her up and get his arms around her. He started to lift her upper body, trying to push back that disturbed feeling by doing something to help her. “C’mon, let’s get you out, okay? Can you stand?”
Mila nodded, lifting her arms to grab onto him. She closed her eyes tight to shut out the noise and the cooler air in the bathroom against her skin caused her to shiver. Laughter caught in her throat, sounding more like a sob before she forced it down. She continued to shiver and Mila had to resist pulling away to sit back down into the water that was quickly draining in the tub. "I'm sorry," she muttered, though she wasn't sure what she was apologizing for. Mila clung to Aaron tightly, afraid to let go. And for a brief moment, she thought about telling him she wanted to move. Somewhere far away from this house and the woods around it. But the feeling passed quickly and she exhaled softly. "I'm okay," Mila told him, sounding more confident and alert. "I just fell asleep, I think."
Aaron lifted Mila out of the tub and carefully settled her onto her feet, glad that her grip on him was firm. It was kind of grounding, and he needed that at the moment. He kept an arm around her as he reached for a towel, and pulled it off the rack to wrap it around her back. Aaron started rubbing his hands over the terrycloth to work on getting her as dry as he could without them having to let go of one another quite yet. He wasn’t sure what the apology was for either, but sometimes those just slipped out for no reason. “Were you having a bad dream or something?” he asked in a murmur, his brow still furrowed with concern. Something didn’t feel right about that explanation, but he couldn’t put his finger on it.
The feel of the towel against her skin caused her to jerk lightly in his arms, but Mila settled quickly and buried her face against his chest. Her skin felt like it was on fire but in an odd way, it didn't hurt. If anything, she was shivering, wishing she were back underwater. "Probably," she said, her words muffled by his shirt. "I don't know. I don't want to talk about it." And that would be all she'd need to say to put this conversation to bed before she had to answer more questions. "I just want to go lay down." Mila lifted her head from his chest to look at him. "I'm tired."
Aaron’s instinct was that Mila was brushing him off and she should talk about it, because something didn’t feel right. It wasn’t just this, it was a couple of other things that had been tugging at the edge of his perception ... but the feeling was so vague that he couldn’t put it into words. Mila had just fallen asleep in the tub before she’d adjusted the water to a cooler temperature, then had bad-dream sleep-talked to him, that was all. Right? “Okay,” he murmured uncertainly after a beat, his hands going still over the towel. Aaron softly kissed Mila’s cheek, then pulled back to give her room to move away, even if he really didn’t want her to. He wanted to go with her and get into bed too, maybe cling to her for a while, but Aaron wasn’t sure if that was welcome at the moment.
Mila pulled away and wrapped the towel as tightly around her as she could before turning to walk into the bedroom. It felt like two different people were warring inside of her mind. One amused and relieved at how oblivious and naïve Aaron could be, and another that wanted to shake him and beg him for help. But she didn't know what kind of help she needed and she always seemed to zone out whenever she tried to think about it too much. Like everything was just put on pause until she was distracted by something else. Opting against putting on clothes, Mila climbed into bed, towel and all, and curled up, pulling the blanket up over her body. Her skin stung where it pressed against the sheets. It felt good. After a moment, Mila felt her chest clench tightly and she lifted her head from the pillow. "Aaron?"
Aaron watched her go, his chest and stomach feeling unsettled. He didn’t know what to do at the moment, or if Mila wanted him to go with her, so he just pulled another towel down to dry up where they’d gotten water on the floor and the edge of the tub. It was a useless gesture, but sometimes those were all he could come up with. He had just shuffled out of the bathroom and turned off the lights when Aaron heard her call for him. He hurried into the bedroom, his heart pounding all over again. “Yeah?” he asked, moving to the side of the bed.
For some strange reason she felt herself relax as soon as he came into the room and Mila rested her head back on her pillow, looking up at him. "Will you lay with me?" She didn't know if he would want to go back out into the living room or not, but Mila figured he could always slip out once she fell asleep. It probably wouldn't take very long. "Just for a while." She didn't want to be in there by herself, but that sounded silly and juvenile to say out loud, like she was afraid of monsters in her closet or something. But there was that out of sorts feeling again and she couldn't seem to scratch it out no matter what she did.
Aaron was relieved to hear that question, and he smiled faintly at her. “Yeah, sure, definitely,” he murmured. He stripped his t-shirt off -- it was wet anyway -- and ditched his lounge pants, then went to flick the lamp off. There were still lights on in the living room and kitchen, but he could take care of those later. He didn’t feel like he would be falling asleep anytime soon. Aaron climbed into bed with Mila and shifted in close, reaching for her under the covers. He felt the wet towel and hummed a tiny bit. “Wanna get rid of this?” he asked softly.
Mila shifted a bit when Aaron joined her and it took her a second to realize he was talking about the towel. She nodded and lifted her body just enough for him to pull it out from beneath her. With that out of the way, Mila scooted in close to him, taking his arm to wrap it around her tightly. "Don't let me go anywhere, okay?" she murmured as she closed her eyes. "Even if I say I want to, just... don't." She was only vaguely aware of the words as she started to doze. It felt like she could sleep for days all of the sudden, and maybe that wouldn't be such a bad thing.
Aaron let the towel drop over the side of the bed and settled in with Mila, not minding where she moved his arm in the slightest. He held her close against him, and was just starting to really relax when she spoke again. It made Aaron frown vaguely again. Where would she go? The tunnel occurred to him, of course, but as far as he knew, she hadn’t been back there since they’d last talked about it. “Okay,” he whispered, not sure what else to say. Aaron gave Mila’s head a soft kiss. “I love you.” She was breathing like she was already drifting off, so maybe she would just take the words with her into sleep and get some real rest.
The words sounded far away from her and Mila thought she responded to them properly, but it was more like a faint noise in her throat. Deep down Mila knew Aaron was something of a pushover and if she really wanted to climb out of bed in the middle of the night to leave the house, he would probably cave and let her. But she wanted to stay here in bed, with his arm around her, so that's where she was determined to stay. And for a long time, it was. Mila had no idea what time it was when she heard the pounding at the bedroom door. It jolted her awake, her heart caught in her throat. The room was completely dark and while his arm was no longer around her, Aaron was asleep in the bed beside her. He hadn't heard it. He never did. A rational person would think there was someone in the house. But this had happened before, and Mila knew better. She sat up slowly and stared at the door, holding her breath. The knob turned and the door creaked open, but there was no one there.
Mila. Come see me.
Her entire body felt tense now. Tense and clammy and Mila should have reached over to wake up Aaron, but she was afraid of what that might do. So instead she got out of bed carefully and quietly pulled some clothes on in the dark. Since the door was already open she slipped out of the room and padded down the hallway to shove her feet into a pair of sneakers. She told herself she didn't want to go, but if she really didn't, she would have stayed in bed. Right? Even in the dark she could feel it, whatever it was. Or whoever it was. It was watching her, waiting. Tugging on her coat, Mila unlocked the front door and stepped outside onto the porch. It was cold but that didn't deter her from starting down the steps. She knew where she was going, and even in the dark, she knew exactly how to get there.
Aaron was asleep, but he wasn’t resting easy. He’d laid awake for a long time after Mila had dropped off, staring at the shadows on the ceiling while his heart pounded too hard. It wasn’t that he didn’t believe her ... she’d just fallen asleep in the bathtub and then said something weird, even in that hot-ass water ... right? Something didn’t feel right, and he struggled for a while to keep the feeling of helplessness from overpowering him. He eventually got up to turn all the lights off in the house, but went straight back to bed. Aaron fell into a shallow, unhappy sleep, every tiny house sound jerking him back to wakefulness just as he was drifting off for an hour or two, before he sank deeper.
He didn’t realize Mila was gone until he rolled over and his hand and arm encountered nothing but more sheets. Aaron came awake with a sick lurch, and he started to scramble out of bed, the rushing of blood in his ears almost deafening. “Mila?” he called, hurrying to the bathroom first. Aaron flicked the light on, and in the first second of blinding light, he could’ve sworn he saw her, still and pale in the tub with her face underwater. A blink later, it was all empty again. “Mila?” Aaron tried again as he moved toward the living room. He felt the cold air halfway down the hall and he jogged the rest of the way. The front door was open. Aaron’s stomach dropped through the floor and he ran to it, grabbing his boots on his way. “Mila!” he yelled as he hopped down the porch stairs and pulled them on. It was freezing, but Aaron barely felt it on all of his bare skin. He just had to find her. She’d asked him to make sure she didn’t go anywhere, and he hadn’t, and now he had to find her.
Mila heard her name. It made her pause briefly in her journey toward the edge of the woods and she looked over her shoulder to see if he was there. For a second she was sure it was something in the woods, but it hadn't come from there. It took another second for her to realize it was Aaron's voice. He had woken up. Shit. She didn't know what to do. Go back? Keep going? It felt like her body could split in two in that moment, the desire to do both so strong. But then she started walking towards the woods again, moving a little faster now. If she went back, she would have to explain this. She was going to have to explain it anyway, now that he was awake, but she supposed she could just prolong the inevitable by trying to ignore him for now.
She wasn’t in the front, but her car was still there, and Aaron squinted up the street as best he could. Seaview wasn’t the most well-lit area in the world, and there were a lot of houses and trailers crammed close together for someone to duck behind, but he didn’t spot her. He turned to run around the side of their house, biting back the urge to continually shout her name. They had family living very close by, and Aaron didn’t want to wake up the whole neighborhood in his panic. As Aaron rounded the corner of the house, he spotted a white ghostly figure hurrying toward the woods and he knew it was her. “Mila!” Aaron whisper-shouted as he started to sprint in her direction. The cold was burning by now, making him really regret not grabbing a coat, but it was too late now. “Mila, stop!” Aaron reached to grab her arm once he was close enough, breathing hard.
She could hear Aaron getting closer but before she could break out into a run he had grabbed her arm, stopping her in her tracks. Mila turned to look at him, and while she was panting a little from adrenaline, her expression was calm, the look she gave him full of fierce determination. "Let her go," she demanded. It occurred to her what she had just said, and how it didn't make any sense and something uncomfortable twisted in her chest. Mila looked down at Aaron's hand and frowned. "Just let me go, Aaron," she murmured with less hostility. "I'll be okay."
Aaron got a chill down his spine that had nothing to do with the temperature. Let her go? What the fuck? “No,” he said. He tried to sound firm about it, but it came out with a little more desperation than he wanted. “No, you said not to let you go anywhere, Mila. It’s fucking freezing anyway, come back to the house.” Aaron didn’t loosen his grip on her -- he remembered all too well how hard she’d fought him to stay in that goddamn tunnel. Which had to be where she was going, right? The thought made him feel sick, but he couldn’t imagine where else she could be running off to in the woods in the middle of the night. Aaron moved in closer to wrap his arm around her.
Was it cold? Yes. She felt some of it now, with Aaron there talking to her. He had to be freezing out here without a coat. "I can't," Mila said. She reached up to grip his shirt as if to push him away, but she merely held on, almost afraid in a way to let go. If she let go, maybe he would let go and she would be completely lost. It was painful in a way, to feel two different emotions so acutely. Why couldn't she explain it to him? Mila wasn't sure she knew how, and he would think she was crazy. Maybe she was crazy. Maybe that's all this was. But it all felt so real, and the pull inside of her was real. Whatever this was, it was just waiting for her to walk into that tunnel and keep walking. She hadn't been able to do it yet. "If I don't go now, I'll just go later. You can come with me." A hint of desperation slipped into her voice. "Come with me."
His body was starting to shiver hard, the surge of adrenaline not quite enough to combat the cold for long when Aaron was just in his boxers and boots. There was an agonizing tension in his chest that would have been there even on a balmy summer night, however. The way Mila was holding onto him, that stricken tone in her voice, it gave him a feeling of desperation that was physically painful. He was shaking his head as he tried to start steering them away from the woodline, back toward the house. “I can’t, no, and you can’t either,” Aaron was saying. Babbling, really. He did not want to have to pick her up and carry her again, but he couldn’t let her go, with or without him. “Please Mila, come on, come home.”
"No," Mila said, shivering now as the cold began to seep into her bones. She pushed against his arm, desperation starting to take over everything else. It was a fear that if she didn't do this, things could get worse, not only for her, but for him too. This was all becoming overwhelmingly frustrating and Aaron didn't seem to understand it.Mila had a hard time understanding it. Would he even believe her if she tried to explain this? "I don't want to hurt you," she breathed, pushing against him again. "Please, Aaron."
Aaron didn’t feel like he understood anything. Mila had warned him, she had known this was coming before she fell asleep, and now she wasn’t listening to him about going back. He hated how it felt to tighten his grip against her pushing at him, to know that he could overpower her again if he needed to, and to see that it might become necessary. Had she done this before? Gone out to the tunnel? More than once, maybe? Fuck, he couldn’t think about that, not yet. “No,” he said more forcefully. Aaron turned her around and started to pull her back toward the house. “You said not to let you and I promised, so I can’t. You can’t go back there, Mila, it’s not good, okay? Just come back, please, for me?” He wasn’t giving her much of a choice physically, but it still felt right to try and talk her into doing it voluntarily.
He was stronger than she was and Mila started to walk beside him, stumbling only once, rather than be dragged like a child. "You don't understand," Mila said, sounding angry now. She tried to push him off of her again, but it was cold and he was strong and it really didn't do much to stop their progress back to the house. Her fingers were starting to feel the bite of the night air and she wished she was back in the bathtub, burning in the water. "Aaron," she whimpered. "I think I'm going to be sick." Her stomach rolled uncomfortably and she barely managed to turn away from him before she bent over and threw up into the stiff grass. It burned her throat, bringing tears to her eyes. Mila felt like a disaster all of the sudden, something that couldn't be fixed. And Aaron was there, dealing with it when he shouldn't have to.
Aaron stopped walking when Mila turned away, that warning sounding so pitiful it nearly broke his heart. He gave her room to puke, but didn’t completely let go of her arm, too worried about her bolting away from him. His whole body was shuddering with the cold, and Aaron could hear his teeth clicking together. It had been so stupid to run out without even a coat -- what if she’d been way farther away? -- but it was too late now. “I’m sorry,” Aaron mumbled uselessly, rubbing his hand over her back. He wanted to go run and get someone, Roxy or Caden or Gavin someone who was actually capable of dealing with problems, because he felt completely lost, just running on instinct. He knew better than to actually do that, but God, did he want help with this.
It was so like Aaron to apologize when he had done nothing wrong. She had told him not to let her go anywhere, and now she was fighting him. Mila hadn't been lying. She didn't want to hurt him, and now she was afraid she might. What if she couldn't help herself, like she couldn't help going to the tunnel. "You don't have to say you're sorry," Mila muttered, using the back of her hand to wipe her mouth. Her stomach hurt all of the sudden and the cold was becoming a bit too much to bear. Aaron had to be freezing. "I'm the one who should be sorry," she said, coughing and spitting once more before sparing a glance at him. "I shouldn't have brought you into any of this. I should've just let you go." Crying now, Mila lifted her shirt to wipe at her face. "I want to go home."
Aaron’s natural inclination was to give the people he cared about what they wanted, to please them, because that was safest thing and it got him love in return. He wanted to give Mila everything she wanted, but he couldn’t give her this and it made him feel guilty. He had no idea what was going on, but it was scary and they had to fight it. Mila’s words stung a bit, made him want to cry too on top of everything else, but Aaron pushed those feelings away. There were more important things to take care of first. “We’re almost there, c’mon,” he murmured through his chattering teeth, wrapping his arm around her again. This time it was more supportive than constrictive. Aaron started them walking again, and he was pretty sure he’d never been more glad to step inside of anywhere as he was when they walked into the house. He rubbed at Mila’s arms briefly before he turned to shut and lock the door behind them.
The house was infinitely warmer than being outside, but Mila still shivered even after Aaron shut the door. If she was cold she knew he had to be freezing. "I'm sorry," Mila said, walking over to sit down on the couch, her arms wrapped around her body. "I don't know what to do. I don't want you to get hurt." She could feel the tears dripping from her face onto her legs, but she looked at Aaron, trying to figure out the best way to explain any of this. He might not even want to know, she wasn't sure. "I don't think it's going to stop."
After he kicked his boots off of numb feet, Aaron followed Mila to the couch. He sat down right next to her, letting those words process for a second while he pulled the big soft blanket off the back of the couch to wrap around both of them. He was still shivering like a madman, and he needed her body heat to help him warm back up. Aaron looked over, his face drawn and pale and worried. “What won’t stop? Tell me what’s happening,” he said quietly, reaching for her hand under the blanket. “Maybe I can help somehow. But you gotta tell me now, please.”
Mila wanted to tell him, and yet she didn't. She didn't know how he could help, and honestly, she had no clue where to even begin because so much of it didn't make sense to her. She clutched the side of the blanket around her and squeezed his hand, simply needing to feel the physical touch there to stay grounded. "I don't even know how to explain it without sounding crazy," Mila murmured. "I feel like... something's been here with me since we went to the tunnel. I hear things... feel things. I... zone out and lose time... it's like I'm not myself." She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, chancing a glance at Aaron. "Something keeps drawing me back to that tunnel and it's like I can't stop it."
Aaron had no idea how he was going to help either. Regardless of what was actually going on, he would probably be personally helpless. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t try. And maybe together they could find someone else who could. The furrows in his brow deepened as Mila spoke, and his grip on her hand got tighter, like he could physically keep something dark from tearing her away from him. Aaron was not a very skeptical person, and he believed everything she was saying. He just didn’t know how to explain it, if it was a mental health problem or something ... else. “What kinds of things are you seeing and hearing?” he asked, his tone still low and quiet.
"I hear... breathing. Someone walking through the house when I'm alone. Knocking on the door when no one is there. Sometimes it's like someone is talking in my head. I have these thoughts that don't feel like my thoughts." Mila blew another breath from between her lips. "I feel crazy but I know I'm not crazy. I think something came back with us after we went into that tunnel, but I know that sounds crazy." She cringed and looked desperately to Aaron. "There are times I feel okay and normal. It's not all the time. But when it happens... I don't know, Aaron. I promise I'm not insane. You believe me, don't you?"
All of that sounded fucking terrifying, and Aaron was gobsmacked that all of this had been going on and he hadn’t known about it. Guilt flooded in -- it was like he’d abandoned her to some demon and hadn’t even noticed it was happening. Sure, she’d obviously been trying to hide it from him, but still. There had been instances of weirdness that he’d just shrugged off, hadn’t there? “I believe you,” he hurried to say first. “Of course I do. Fuck ... Mila, baby, I’m so sorry.” Aaron twisted his upper body to pull her in tight against him in a hug, then let go again and pushed her hair back from her face. “I don’t think you’re crazy, okay? I was in there with you, I know there’s ... something really wrong with that place. If something like ... hitched a ride ...” Possessed, his girlfriend was possessed by a demon or something. “We should get a priest involved,” he declared, as it was the only solution that came into his head.
Something inside of her flinched at the idea of a priest, but Mila didn't know if it was her own feelings about it, or something else. "You think I'm possessed?" Mila asked, brows drawn together curiously. "I don't... I'm still me." Most of the time. And she knew, deep down, something was right with her. But she wasn't sure what that meant, and if it was even something a priest could help with. Possession just sounded so off the wall and nuts. It didn't upset her to go to church, and she never felt off when she listened to the sermons, even if she didn't really believe in them anymore. Mila licked her lips and clung to his hand. "Please don't tell anyone," she whispered. "I mean, if we need to get help but... I don't want anyone to know about this. Please."
Aaron didn’t know much about possession, but what else could it be? He’d never heard of anything else that would cling to a person like that, just for being in a place. “Maybe not like, fully possessed, but if something’s hanging around and fucking with you only ...” Aaron trailed off, because he didn’t know where to follow that sentence to. Her request that he keep his mouth shut was understandable, but it still put a sinking feeling in his stomach. He was sure Mila meant his brothers and Roxy specifically, but he didn’t know if he could deal with this on his own. He was scared and she was scared and if neither of them had a clue what to do, then what did they do? “We do need help,” he said, looking pained. Aaron wanted to promise he wouldn’t tell, but he wasn’t sure he could. “And I dunno where to start ... do you?”
Mila shook her head and then leaned in to rest against him. "Do you think anyone would believe us?" she asked. Even priests... they had to be skeptical, right? It wasn't like this was the movies. And Mila wasn't even sure what was hanging around, or calling her to the tunnel. It might not even be a demon. She didn't have the first clue as to where to start, or who to talk to. "I can't tell my parents. And Roxy and Caden... they're going to have enough to worry about. I just don't know." She sighed and closed her eyes, warmer now with the blanket and curling herself around Aaron the best she could on the couch. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I couldn't figure out how, and I didn't think anything was really wrong. Sometimes when I thought about telling you, something would stop me."
“Somebody’s gotta believe us ...” he murmured, his arms slipping around Mila as much as possible again. The physical contact with her was helping Aaron calm down, not to mention slowly warming him up, and that helped his brain work a little better. He knew who would believe them -- who had believed in fucked up scary shit for most of his life. Even if Mila didn’t particularly want Gavin to know her business, Aaron knew his oldest brother would try to help them, and maybe he actually knew someone who could. “It’s okay, though, I know ... I mean, I understand why you didn’t.” He kissed Mila’s temple. “I think ... I think Gavin might know a witch, if you don’t wanna go to the church. Like a legit witch -- Olivia was obsessed with getting these little protective bag things. He swears by them, I think some stuff has happened to him too, you know? Maybe he can give me a name or something ... I don’t have to tell him details if you don’t want. But we have to do something.”
For some reason Mila found that mildly surprising. Gavin going to a witch. What would a witch be able to do for her? Protective bag things sounded tame compared to what could be going on. But Mila also recognized that she had no idea what this was, or what a witch could really do. It felt awkward asking Gavin for help, but she felt like it would be less awkward than going to the priest at the church. Her parents could find out that way and Mila had been keeping so much from them already. "Do you trust him?" Mila asked, resting her head against his shoulder. "You don't think he'll think we're lying?" She hadn't spoken with Gavin since she quit the bar. They hadn't even seen him at Thanksgiving, so Mila wasn't sure what to expect.
“Yeah, I trust him,” Aaron murmured, one hand moving to rub against Mila’s back a bit. His body was starting to feel tired and heavier now -- except his extremities, which were still tingling painfully -- but he knew he couldn’t go back to sleep. What if Mila was just placating him back to sleep so she could sneak out again? What if that thing tried to take her for good now that it knew he knew? God, this was so fucking scary. “He won’t tell anyone, and I mean ... Amelia came home all grown up. I know he believes in unbelievable shit. And something bad happened to him when he was a kid, something dark. It’s at least somewhere to start, right?”
That was true about Amelia. How could Gavin believe something like that was possible and not what was maybe happening to Mila? She worried that maybe whatever it was that had come home with them would try to stop this, but Mila couldn't let that deter her from trying to get help. She didn't want to hurt Aaron. More than anything she didn't want to hurt him. "If you trust him and you think he might he able to help, then..." Mila trailed off and nodding once. "We can try it." She did want to sleep now, her body feeling heavy now that they were out of the cold and she had gotten so much off her chest. "I'm so sorry," she murmured, closing her eyes.
Aaron felt a bit of relief at that. It was a start, even if it ended up being a false one. If they couldn’t find anyone who knew anything about what this might be, they would go to the clergy and see if they would believe. The priest had changed again, and Aaron knew he probably didn’t know anything about Point Pleasant and what went on there, so he currently had more hope for Gavin helping than anything. “It’s not your fault,” Aaron whispered. He could feel Mila leaning more heavily against him, and she sounded tired. He couldn’t blame her. He kissed her head a couple of slow times, then shifted them a little. “Wanna go back to bed?” he asked softly. Even if he didn’t sleep at all, she probably needed to.
Mila nodded a little against his chest, wishing they didn't have to move. He was warm again and comfortable and she felt safe with his arms around her. Tonight probably should have scared her enough to not be able to fall back asleep, but Mila knew she would likely be out of it by the time her head hit the pillow. She pulled back from Aaron and pressed her lips to his cheek before carefully standing and taking his hand. She realized she needed to fight harder against whatever was happening. And she would. Hopefully now that Aaron knew what was going on, he could help her somehow, though Mila knew she wouldn't depend solely on that.