Katalina Lucas (half_hell) wrote in shadows_rpg, @ 2018-03-27 19:26:00 |
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Entry tags: | #october 2017, gavin, kat |
Love and Hate
Who: Kat and Gavin
When: Thursday October 12th, night
Where: the Back Porch
Status: complete
The only reason Kat hadn’t gone to talk to Gavin before now had been an out of town estate sale she’d committed to helping with for a fantastic discount on vintage items she could rework for her shop. She hadn’t felt she could pass that up, and she hadn’t returned home until nearly eleven thirty in the evening on Wednesday. Sleep, a day’s work to clear her mind and she was off to the Back Porch. She had her doubts as to whether Aaron would try to get Gavin to see his point of view again or if he’d give up, not wanting the hassle, and as always, she felt compelled to stand up for him. It was a long-standing habit and she was sure it wouldn’t surprise Gavin at all, but she had to put her two cents’ worth in, whether or not it was wanted.
She parked her car and swept into the bar in a swirl of agitation, heels clicking on the floor and blonde hair fanning out behind her. Once she’d reached the bar itself, the bartender grabbed a bottle of her usual beer and handed it to her without waiting to be asked, and she thanked him with a smile that was sincere even if not as bubbly as her usual. After glancing around and not seeing her brother, she headed for the office. Some people avoided confrontation, but there was something in her that demanded she speak her mind… especially with her brothers.
It had only been a matter of time before Kat showed up and Gavin knew this. He got along with his sister just fine but he knew whose side she was on when something came up and this was far more serious than usual. He was going over the payslips when she appeared in his doorway and for once she was not a welcome sight. "If Aaron sent you I'm not in the mood," he muttered as he turned his attention back to the computer. He didn't expect that to make her go away but it was always worth a try.
Kat stepped inside the office and shut the door behind her, using a little more force than was strictly necessary. “I don’t give a fuck if you’re in the mood,” she said succinctly. She had a way of losing her temper while keeping her voice perfectly modulated; no matter how mad she might be at any of her brothers, she wouldn’t yell and act the fool in their place of business. She knew what it meant to build a business from the ground up and she wouldn’t jeopardize anyone else’s. “And no, he didn’t send me, but I feel compelled to ask you what is wrong with you?” She seated herself in a chair across from his desk and crossed her legs, propping the beer bottle on her thigh. If she got pregnant, would he have told her to abort her baby? She wondered.
She got under his skin, she usually did. She'd had an easy life compared to the rest of them and she was doing well for herself. Gavin wasn't surprised to hear that she didn't understand the gravity of the situation. He turned in his chair again with a heavy sigh, crossing his arms over his chest. "Kat," he said as evenly as that tension frustration growing inside him would let him. "I've got work to do and I am not talking to you about this right now." What was wrong with him? A long list of shit, that was what, but in this case he knew he was right, Mila and Aaron were on a collision course and the rest of them were along for the ride.
Gavin could make her furious. Probably Caden was best at it, all things being equal, but her oldest brother did his fair share. She swung her foot, a casual stance even if she didn’t feel casual inside. The only way Gavin was going to make her leave before she was ready would be if he physically picked her up and moved her, and if he did that? All bets would be off. She’d act like the worst barfly the Back Porch had ever seen and would probably bust her bottle over his head to boot. “Let me be sure I have this straight,” she said, her gaze pure poison. “You had time to treat Aaron like shit and tell Mila she should have an abortion, but you don’t have time for me to tell you what an asshole you are.”
Gavin turned around, only because he couldn't afford to go punching his computer monitor. He crossed his arms over his chest and watched his sister with a levelled glare. Let her get it out of her system and bitch at him until she got bored, that was usually his strategy with her. Trying to justify himself was a waste of breath, she wouldn't listen. She'd come there to bitch him out and she wouldn't be satisfied until she had done that.
There wasn’t anyone else in the universe who could make her feel the same desperate blend of love and hate as her two oldest siblings. Kat wasn’t sure she thought Gavin was smart enough to be manipulating her with his silence, but sometimes it felt that way. Sometimes, it was all she could do to keep from using her harshest and most unfair words as weapons. She wanted to right now. “What is it?” she asked. “I’m not worth an explanation? You don’t think anyone should call you on your bullshit?” The worst part of this was that she loved and respected Gavin, oldest brother and father substitute, and she knew he’d been through a lot in his life. She appreciated the things he’d done for her and Aaron both. But at the same time, he was too heavy-handed and she thought he needed to know it.
Gavin thought about his conversation with Caden. That small hope was like an anchor right now, keeping him from flying off the handle. "You are so young, Kat," he muttered finally. "You've had it easy compared to the rest of us. None of this will affect you. You'll get to play fun aunt when you please and then you'll be on your way when it gets tiresome." He leaned forward, resting his arms on his legs as he narrowed his eyes at her in thought. "I want what's best for Aaron and if he's too mule headed to see this isn't good for him? I'll be there to pick up the shit like I always am.”
“Oh my God,” Kat muttered, wondering if it was possible to crack a beer bottle with her grip on it. “I’m twenty six, Gavin. That is not young. Jasper is young.” She was mildly surprised that he’d even spoken to her; it had looked like he was going to give her the silent treatment at first. There was a part of her that knew Gavin meant well, but she hated the way he went about things a lot of times. Maybe that was her issue, that he couldn’t ever communicate anything to Aaron without hurting him, whether or not he meant to do so. She strove for calm, taking a silent breath or two before speaking again. “What you’re overlooking in this is that the baby’s a fact, whether or not you think it’s good for him, and he wants it. Even if he and Mila don’t work out long term, he’ll do his best.”
"Like I said," Gavin sighed, tilting his head back. "I'll be here to pick up the pieces when it all falls apart, that's as close as you're getting to my blessing over this goddamn mess.” He was craving a cigarette now, and a drink, but that required getting up and he honestly didn't want to do that until she had left. "Was that all, Kat?"
Kat would never, ever let him know it, but the way Gavin treated her sometimes made her feel like shit. He behaved as if she were a stupid bottle blonde who didn’t have enough sense to understand anything. The same feelings he’d provoked in her from the time she was old enough to realize what their lot in life had been with horrible parents and that Gavin and Caden were the closest to parents that she was going to get clashed inside her: helpless fury along with the desire to go to him and be held and maybe believe for a few seconds that everything would be all right. “I don’t need your blessing,” she bit out, well aware that he wanted her to leave and was probably being a dick just so she would. “I keep trying to remind you you’re a human being but I guess it’s no use.”
Uncrossing her legs, she got up from the chair, red spots burning high in her cheeks. He was such an asshole and she loved him and she also hated him and wasn’t this how it always went? “That’s not anywhere close to all, but I’m fucking over this,” she said. Condescending jerk. Was that all, shit.
She clearly wasn't over it at all but as long as she was sulky about it somewhere else, Gavin didn't truly care. As far as she knew, he was done meddling. He and Caden had other plans and if everything went as desired they wouldn't have to worry about any of this anymore even if Aaron and Mila wouldn't listen to reason. "Good," he muttered wryly. "I'm glad you're over it." He cocked a brow at her and nodded toward the door. She'd be mad at him for a while, he knew that, but he wasn't all that happy with her either, attacking him like this.
The only possible things for Kat to do right now were scream her frustration at the top of her lungs or maybe pour the rest of her beer right over the top of his desk. Both, even. Since she couldn’t do either, she turned and stalked out of the office, allowing herself to slam the door behind her. It was the least obtrusive of all the options she had. Thrusting the beer into the hand of the nearest server, who luckily wasn’t carrying anything else, she strode out of the building, her heels tapping an enraged staccato as she did.