I don't (do) want to know what you were thinking (smoking/drinking/inhaling) while writing (magicking) this fantastical tale but I love it!
It's like a more logical, minutely less psychedelic version of Alice in Wonderland.
Brilliant! Brilliant! Best use of HP magic in a non-hp magic way! It felt AU yet the magic was of the HP variety, the characters were the HP characters.
Sorry my vocabulary isn't large enough to express the joys I felt in reading this so I'll simply settle for my old standby- brilliant!