Author and Artist Interviews 2009: Gingertart
Members,
After much whipping and paddling, the third in the 2009 Author and Artist Interviews is with gingertart50.
Interview with gingertart
November, 2009
“Is this entirely necessary?” WhiteCotton asked, raising an eyebrow.
“He’s late,” atypicalsnowman answered, “And we were bored. We’ll stop as soon as he gets here.”
“Should we really be doing this without the textbook?” Torina asked, looking around the lab as if hoping the directions would miraculously be there this time.
“Do you honestly think this recipe is in a kids’ textbook?” thesewarmstars responded as she held onto the wooden rod with both hands, straining to stir the thick mixture.
“Oh, give me that,” snow snapped. “You’re doing it wrong.”
Thesewarmstars leaned away from her. “I’m doing it fine!”
“No, you need to stir faster. Let me do it!”
“I can do it! I’m perfectly capable of stirring all by myself!”
“Um, guys?” Torina took a step back. “Is it supposed to be smoking like that?” she asked, but neither of them heard her over their bickering.
“If that explodes,” WhiteCotton announced, “do not expect me to mourn for you.” “Damn it, we agreed I would stir!”
Atypicalsnowman waved her hand through the air impatiently. “That was before you started fucking it all up!”
“Guys, seriously…”
WhiteCotton scowled. “You’ll be covered in it and make a very bad impression on our guest. Must you be so juvenile?”
“She started it!” snow yelled, elbowing thesewarmstars in the side.
“Did not!”
Torina’s eyes went wide. “You’re going to knock it…! Oh, there it goes.”
All four watched in horror as the cauldron tipped and spilled its contents across the previously meticulous workbench, instruments melting and ingredients sizzling as it went.
“Oh, fuck,” thesewarmstars said.
“Yeah,” snow agreed.
Suddenly, the door slammed open. “What is going on in here?” Severus asked, surveying the scene with a stony expression.
Thesewarmstars slowly inched toward the circle of chairs where WhiteCotton sat while Torina and snow scrambled to clean up the mess.
“Who is responsible for ruining my laboratory?” Severus growled.
“Sexy when he’s angry,” WhiteCotton murmured.
“Well, there are two Gryffindors here,” thesewarmstars pointed out, settling next to her fellow Slytherin.
Stepping toward his ruined workbench, Severus scowled. “I might have known. You do realize Gingertart will be here any moment?”
“We didn’t mean to!” Torina insisted.
“It was her fault!” snow accused, pointing at thesewarmstars.
Severus, however, was more focused on the sludge spreading over the workbench. His eyes widened and he looked up in disbelief. “Were you dunderheads trying to brew a personal lubricant?!”
Just then, the door creaked open, and all eyes turned toward Gingertart...
Gingertart takes up the story
...who appeared in the doorway clad in a white lab coat and closely followed by what appeared to be a large, black, woolly sheep. She stopped and stared.
"I'm here for the interview... what happened?"
"They happened," Severus grumbled, waving a hand at the mess. "Merlin knows what would have resulted if that had been applied anywhere intimate." He drew his wand and flicked it negligently, Banishing the sludge to where all the Bad Things and Failed Potions go. He turned his intense black gaze back to Gingertart and folded his arms. "So, remind me which position are you applying for, Madam?"
"I want the position in the middle between him and Lucius..." WhiteCotton muttered and snow nudged her, while thesewarmstars's expression glazed slightly and Torina blinked in a slightly bemused fashion.
"Oh, sorry." Gingertart searched in the pockets of her lab coat. The black woolly creature gave a sharp, very un-sheep-like bark and wagged at Snape, who glowered back.
"That had better not be Black," he said in a very ominous voice indeed.
"What? Of course she's black – oh, sorry, that Black. No, she's my familiar, not an Animagus. Ah, here we are." Gingertart unfolded a piece of creased newspaper and frowned at it. "Wanted, barmaid with advanced laboratory experience, familiar with eccentric institutions of higher education, ability to cook an advantage."
"What barmaiding experience do you have?" WhiteCotton asked hopefully.
"I can tap a barrel of real ale and make a Velvet Hammer. I did three years in hotel bar work." Gingertart dug into her capacious pocket and brought out a bottle of single malt and one of gin. WhiteCotton's eyes gained an extra sparkle.
"What about higher education?" Torina enquired.
"I work for Unseen University."
Torina nodded, looking pleased.
"You say you can cook..." thesewarmstars and atypicalsnowman exchanged knowing looks. Gingertart extracted a small cake tin from the seemingly bottomless pocket.
"Chocolate gateau with chocolate frosting and extra chocolate filling, and chocolate flake: Cadbury's." Gingertart turned to Snape. "Before you ask, I know an awful lot about botulinum toxin and my sterile technique isn't half bad."
"Her what technique?" snow whispered, "is that anything to do with whips and chains?"
"Ssh."
Gingertart shrugged.
"Quite why you need a secretary to be able to keep a bar, work in a lab or cook...by the way, I can drive a fork lift truck too."
"Irrelevant," Severus said. "You're a Ravenclaw, you work it out."
"Ah. The advert was written to draw me in, then."
The famous smirk twitched at Snape's lips. "Go on."
"You brought me here to do something that only I can do?"
"Of course."
Gingertart watched as Severus conjured up glasses, bottles of red wine and tonic and a pumpkin juice for Torina, then she served everyone with drinks as Severus seated himself at the Professor's desk.
"You have a mystery to solve," Gingertart said finally. "I can think of only one thing that these ladies can't do – "
"Ladies?"
"Does she mean us?"
"Ssh!"
"- that I can."
"Exactly."
"I can introduce you to Mr Sherlock Holmes!" Gingertart exclaimed triumphantly.
Severus raised his glass of single malt.
"Indeed. I need him to find two missing persons, last seen together in the foyer of the Ministry of Magic by a rather drunken George Weasley. They vanished, leaving behind a goat wearing two left Wellington boots, a quart of pickled nasturtiums and a faint scent of ammonia, although that might have been something to do with the goat. Mr Weasley was somewhat befuddled, having just left the party celebrating the birth of his youngest brother's first child. "
"And these two persons...?" Gingertart asked gently, "Were they by any chance, Mr Potter and Mr Malfoy?"
Severus gave a brusque nod.
"Neither of my young acquaintances has been seen since."
"Acquaintances?" Torina whispered to WhiteCotton. "Is that what they call them now?"
"What are we waiting for?" Gingertart asked, taking a very strange pocket watch from the top pocket of her lab coat. "Here you are. You'll need to go to 1896 and fetch him – and the good doctor as well, naturally. I'm sure they can find your boyfr – ahem, your friends for you."
Severus Snape reached out and took the watch, a strange expression in his sharp black eyes...
Questions
1. How did you start writing fanfiction?
Choose one or more of the following answers:
a) Badly b) On a clapped-out Apple Mac c) 'It was a dark and stormy night...' d) I discovered mpreg (OMG WTF?)
2. But why slash?
You can't have mpreg without it, or, to quote someone else's response to that question (I can't remember whose), 'two men, two cocks, what's not to like?'
3. Is Harry Potter your first fandom or did you wet your feet in another?
I was a fandom virgin until I discovered Snarry and Snupin. Actually I read a little LOTR slash first but Snarry drew me in to participate. There was mpreg, you see.
4. Which character do you enjoy writing most?
Do you really need to ask? Who else is half as complex, mysterious, temperamental, intelligent, loyal, vicious, protective, witty, tormented, courageous, sarcastic, powerful fierce, articulate, bitter, emotionally repressed and damaged and sexy as ... um, who were we talking about? Sorry, it's my age.
5. What is it about Severus *sighs* you find sexy?
Alan Rickman's voice, canon Snape's savage wit, black eyes, swirling black robes and incredibly powerful personality; love him or loathe him, you can't ignore him. I've always been drawn to power and besides, I had a terribly embarrassing crush on my chemistry master at school.
6. Of your own work, which is your favourite?
Echoes. I loved writing grown-up Harry with his kids.
7. Which one do you think is your most underappreciated work?
The underappreciated ones didn't deserve appreciation, frankly, and the four that I was pleased with, got far more than I expected. So I don't think I have an underappreciated work, unless you count the art. Let's not count the art.
8. Do you have a favourite piece written by another writer, perhaps one that drew you into the fandom or which you tell yourself you actually did write in another life?
Quid Pro Quo by Aucta Sinistra was the first Snarry I read that totally blew me away, followed rapidly by the early stories by DementorDelta.
9. Is there a genre/pairing/kink you would like to write, but seem unable to do to your satisfaction?
Snupin. I like Lupin, that fragile balance of reserved British schoolmaster and wild beast, but I've never managed to write anything in the pairing to my satisfaction. Perhaps he is too much of a wimp, and at least Harry can't be accused of that.
10. Do you ever feel the need to experiment, to try your hand at death!fics or extreme BDSM perhaps?
I'm rather vanilla, really. BDSM leaves me cold, I don't like PWP or pr0n for the sake of it; what I love is the development of relationships (and a good strong plot is a happy bonus.) I don't like cross-over fics either, because I usually don't know the 'other' canon, so I challenged myself to write a cross-over. Perhaps writing it for the Snarry Games was a bit OTT but yay! It worked. I'd like to write a different pairing. I read a range of pairings but oddly enough, they always have Snape in them. Can't imagine why. I like him with Draco, Lucius, Lupin, Hermione, Harry, Bill, Charlie, Kingsley, Percy or the Weasley twins, and I love the dynamics of a well-written three-some. Some of my favourite fics are Harry/Snape/Draco or Hermione/Snape/Lucius. I have written a couple of small three-some fics. I would like to write a good het fic.
11. Tell us the plot of up to 5 fics you'd love to write but haven't yet and why.
If I had 5 more plots I would have written 5 more fics! How about...
Molly Weasley dabbles in ancient magic in an attempt to pair Harry off with Ginny and her plan misfires spectacularly. If anyone is a smug know-it-all in canon, she's it. You can argue with Hermione (I like Hermione) but you can't argue with the self-righteous mother-knows-best Molly Weasley. I haven't written it yet because I need more plot than that to hang it on.
A sequel to my Snarry games fic The Fourth Deathly Hallow in which Snape, Harry and Draco go back to 1896. Needs more plot, though.
A Snape/Hermione (with a grown-up Hermione) but I haven't got a plot.
I begin to sense a theme here.
12. Is there a fic you almost didn't write, but which you are now pleased you did?
Getting Familiar in last year's Snarry Games. I got the most awful case of writer's block, aka sheer terror. I'd really stretched myself and written two longish fics in rapid succession for two exchange fests, Echoes and Being Snape, and I was getting burned out. I had really wanted to be in the Games and then nothing I tried worked. My plot-bunny wrangler kept telling me that I was writing crap (bless her, she's a star) and I ended up going away on holiday for a week up a Welsh mountain in the rain with a laptop, and I just threw myself into the middle of a fic the hard way: Snape, in the Shack, survived by taking on his animagus form, which was small and resistant to venom. What was that animagus form? Once I got that, he started to speak to me, and I had his voice and off I went. I was pleased with it, I like writing humour.
13. How important to you is your writing? For example would you sell your first born for it?
I don't have a first-born. Kids would take me away from the writing so I don't have any. Dogs are more tolerant of an owner who requires surgical removal from her keyboard and mouse when it comes to walkies time.
14. Do you have a pet beta, one who you always turn to first and who is collared and tied to your desk?
I did when I first started writing fanfic; she introduced me to Snarry, mentored me, held my hand, and was totally supportive and wonderful. *hugs Rakina* Real Life issues mean that she can no longer beta for me. I now have a vital plot-bunny wrangler, who is invaluable. I suck at plot, plot is my weakness. I can write characters, landscapes, humour, conversations, they all come easily but getting the plot, the scaffolding to built them on, is a bugger. She is happy to tell me when I'm talking out of my arse, or, as she is American, out of my ass. She helped me to knock all four of my best fics into shape. *salutes Lesyeuxverts with glass of single malt*
15. Do you have any bullet-proof kinks and squicks, ones that would even tempt you to read Severus *sighs* and Colin Creevey?
*whispers* mpreg but only if done extremely well. My big kink, if you can call it that, is for non-fluffy romance and plot. Bonding and courtship fics, someone being cursed and going to Snape for help, that kind of cliché. Yeah, I know, but I'm old...
16. Which character(s) do you think you are most like?
On a bad day, I vacillate between Neville and Sybill Trelawney; on a good day, I'd like to think I'm Minerva. In reality, I probably resemble Trevor, or if I have a migraine, Nagini.
17. What character do you struggle with most when writing?
Dumbledore. I don't like him much and his motivation is often obscure, suspect or downright bad. I dislike how he treated Harry and hate how he treated Snape.
18. What's the most challenging thing about the process of writing fanfiction?
PLOT! Gah, everything else hangs on it. Get the plot right, and by that, I mean the right characters in the right situations, with the right balance of humour, sex, romance, mystery, POV, angst, action and a satisfying ending, like a single thread running from start to finish, and you're away. Sometimes it takes another person to see where you're going astray. Sometimes it all just flows.
19. At which point does your personal ‘canon’ deviate from book canon? And which of your stories tells what really happened?
I like to write within, around, and after canon and I don't deviate much. In my personal canon, Snape survives. The mechanism can be stated (medical intervention just in time, Fawkes returns to cry over the wounds, someone uses a time-turner) or back story (he's a Potions Master, for Christ's sake! He carries a bezoar and a first-aid kit!) Sometimes Lupin survives too, because he's a werewolf and he claws his way out of the ground at the next full moon. I sometimes cheat and ignore the Epilogue from Hell and I sometimes have Harry marry then divorce Ginny (because I like the kids) or cheat on her (because I don't like her much.)
20. When you began to write sex scenes, did you rely on what you had already read in fanfiction or kidnap and interrogate a gay acquaintance?
I worked in a hotel for a couple of years, which was something of an education, and one of the assistant managers was gay. He lurched from relationship to relationship and I was happy to provide alcohol and sympathy when things fell apart in his life (as they did very regularly). He would tell me all about his boyfriends/sexlife/fantasies after a couple of bottles of wine, and since I had to drive home, I remained sober and remembered most of it.
21. Of your favourite fics, which do you consider to be your best and why? Go on, don’t be modest!
The Fourth Deathly Hallow has the most complex and satisfying plot, the most character development and the best OCs of anything I've written yet.
22. Do you set specific characters always to be a friend or an enemy to your heroes?
Yes. Hermione and Ron are always Harry's supportive friends, usually the rest of the Weasleys are as well and Voldie is always an enemy. Most of the Hogwarts staff are sorry for the way they treated Snape, and usually Minerva and Filius are bright enough to suspect his true allegiance and they certainly respect him. The Malfoys are always Snape's friends and allies, although the relationship between Harry and Draco can range from full-on fighting through UST to a wary friendship.
23. What is the most valuable piece of advice you've ever received about writing stories (fanfic or otherwise)?
Write what you want to read, not what you think other people want to read, so that you put your heart into it, not just your brain - which is why I write fanfic for free instead of the stuff for which I used to occasionally get paid.
24. Are you hurt by bad reviews or criticism?
I'm a fragile little flower and I cry if people hurt me. Constructive criticism is fine, though. I need people to tell me where I go wrong and I appreciate it if it makes my writing better, especially where commas are concerned.
25. If your Severus *sighs* were to play a musical instrument, what would it be?
I see him as rather Holmesian, playing the violin; although there is no way that the young Snape could have owned an instrument or paid for the lessons. I am tempted to have him play something really odd, an instrument that he found or was given by an eccentric relative, a penny whistle, Jews Harp or mouth organ (!)
26. Would you consider writing professionally? Or do you?
I did but I gave it up for Lent. I prefer writing fanfic, I like the feedback and the freedom.
27. How has your involvement changed over the years, and where do you see yourself fandom-wise in 5 years?
I lurked and read for years, then commented and then began writing. The writing has dropped off in volume over the last year because I ran out of inspiration but I love writing. What is most likely to change is my preferred pairing. I recently started reading Snape/Hermione and everything is fresh and new and I still have lots of the classic fics to read, but whatever happens, I'm unlikely to abandon Snape. I'll just go and read him with someone else.
28. What is your most prized fandom memento/collectable?
Am I allowed my two gold medals from the Snarry Games?
29. Being Snape purposely leaves the reader questioning what will happen next. Were you tempted, while writing it, to go on to include a happily ever after for Severus *sighs* and Harry?
No. I wanted to write something darker than my usual style, the ending was going to be far grimmer than it ended up. My plot beta suggested a cyclic fic, looping back to the start after Harry had been Obliviated, and I realised that I could leave them with the possibility of another opportunity in the future, a glimmer of hope.
30. You have an excellent gift for last lines, are you conscious of this? If so – and as last line whores ourselves – do you invest a lot of effort on them?
Ha! I have a terrific plot-bunny wrangler to help with those. I also like to know where I'm aiming for, I tend to have the last line in mind by the time I'm half way through the fic. I do spend a lot of time thinking about exactly where the story needs to end. For example, I knew right from the start in Getting Familiar that Harry would have to make some comment about Snape's eight inches, I just couldn't resist.
31. You have written both humour and mystery very well, which do you enjoy more?
An easy one to end with – humour. *smirks for England*
...Sometime Later
“Now, just a few more questions, Ginger, and then I think we can—what the fuck!” WhiteCotton snapped her head towards Severus’ office door, behind which was the strangest of sounds.
“I’ll have a peek, see what’s happening, shall I?” snow offered, already half out of her chair.
She was suddenly back in it when the door opened and a strange man emerged.
It wasn’t that the man was a stranger, per se, as all the Webmistresses knew full well that strange men went in and out of Severus’ office all the time – and his bedroom and bathroom and anywhere else that took Severus’ fancy. No, it was the strangeness of the man, particularly his spats and top hat.
Poised mid-interview, the five women eyed him suspiciously—except for WhiteCotton, who rather liked her men in spats, although as he was also wearing trousers, frock coat and cape, she did level a disapproving look as he passed by their table and out of the other door.
“Who the hell was that?” thesewarmstars asked of no one in particular, and as it was asked of no one in particular, no one felt obliged to answer.
Which was just as well because they had no sooner bent their heads back to the question sheets when another interruption occurred.
This time the door was flung open and a whirlwind on eight short legs flew into the lab.
“Wocher, guv’nor,” said the tail of the whirlwind, doffing his cap to WhiteCotton. “Haf ter fly, for we’re on ‘im, see.” And then the whirlwind was gone, following the path of spats and top hat.
The women looked at each other, the general feeling being that they’d got the script to the wrong play.
“Was that French?” asked Torina.
The door slammed open again, bouncing so hard off the stone wall that the iron handle drew sparks. Like the villain he was – for there was no doubt the black-clad, muffler-wrapped man was indeed Professor Moriarty – the newcomer stepped into the lab, lifted his chin, and threw his cloak theatrically over a shoulder. He paused for effect for a moment, then strode out after the whirlwind.
“I say,” said Ginger, “this is a bit odd. Is it a regular event?”
WhiteCotton and snow glared at her. “Indeed, no!” said the former, and “fuck no!” said the latter at the same time and more fluently.
Thesewarmstars had just decided that being seated in the chair closest to the office door was precarious at best, when the door opened for the fourth time. She jumped, ready to scuttle under it, when she stopped on recognising the latest arrivals.
“Harry! Draco!” she exclaimed.
The two young men skidded to a halt, their mouths widening into huge grins.
“No!” Having reached the end of her tether, WhiteCotton sprang from her chair and threw her arms into the air. “Century old thieves I can handle; whirlwinds with legs and villain professors I can – and do – handle. But Draco Malfoy I cannot, and will not, tolerate.” She moved, catlike, towards the smaller (in every sense) Malfoy, but her prey suddenly lurched out of reach when two others barged into him, having run at full speed through the door.
WhiteCotton took one look at Severus Snape, standing side-by-side with Sherlock Holmes, and swooned.
Holding her advertisement aloft, Ginger squeaked, “I’ll take the job!”
On behalf of Severus Sighs, we would very much like to thank Gingertart for taking part in this interview.
The Webmistresses
Enjoy the darkness and sweet sensual pleasure that is Severus *sighs*
Webmistresses of Severus Sighs
Site Owner – WhiteCotton Site Moderators – atypicalsnowman, thesewarmstars, and Torina Archelda Artwork by Cluegirl and banner by Bielol Severus.sighs@gmail.com