I opened a portal and dropped into it to reappear between Bard and Victor.
"Bardy don't hurt him! We didn't do anything together at all! He's not even interested in me! He wants to do the hot monkey nasty with Miki over there! We just got plastered at the cafe and I brought them back here to make sure they were safe. I mean we really got shit faced drunk last night..."
I trailed off realizing saying that to my dad was probably not a great way to get him to calm down.
"Um, anyway I brought them back here and then I slept on the dinning room table... I'm not real sure why I slept there other than I was so drunk I couldn't make it up to my room..."
Again, not the smartest thing to say to Bardy.
"Um, so while I slept there, Miki and Victor slept together on my couch! Not that they slept together, slept together! They didn't make with the hot monkey sex, at least I don't think they did. They just slept."
I look over at Miki. "You could stuff something in my mouth before I dig this hole any deeper you know."
I hear deep noises coming from Bardy and think he is still growling at Victor when I realize he is not growling, he's laughing... at me!