And let's not forget that Tarantula is the one that actually creates the wedge that breaks Dick and Babs up during Grayson's run. Blockbuster hired her in the first place to screw with (ha!) Nightwing.
Where the self-insertion/Mary-sue stuff comes in is that 'Grayson' isn't her birth name (she changed it later) and she was sexually abused as a child (which prompted the name change to distance herself).