Sirius found himself slouched against the unfamiliar therapy couch. He didn't want to be here. It was a beautiful day outside. He could have been playing Quidditch, drinking, ignoring everything that he'd lost -- or not lost -- in the Arena. Instead, he was here, eyeing his assigned therapist warily.
"So, uh, where do we begin?" he asked, idly drumming his fingers against his knee.
Claire was exhausted but she didn’t show it.
“How did you sleep last night?” Claire asked taking a direct approach with Sirius Black. She knew this current situation was far from normal and her current influx of patients had been through so much even Claire wondered how they would fair going forward.
Sirius shrugged lazily. "S'alright," he said. He'd spent much of the night reliving his 'death', hearing Reg's voice and then...nothing. It had been bizarre, to say the least, blowing up and being alive at the same time. It didn't make any sense to him. "Caught a few hours of sleep before training this morning. Got to keep fit for Quidditch and all that."
“Are you having any dreams?” Claire asked smiling softly at his comment about Quidditch. “It does seem to be a sport that requires good physical health.” She had a feeling it would take a while to get him to actual open up.
"Well, not about Quidditch," he said, with a weighty pause. "James...my best mate, he's the -- aspiring Quidditch star." He looked up at Claire, weighing his options. True, he didn't want to be here. The idea of discussing his deepest, darkest feelings with anyone other than his two best mates (and Julia) was, well, awful. But he had to be here. Until such a time as he could figure out how to get out of that, he supposed he could at least be friendly. "The Lethal Lynxes have got to have the two best Chasers in the league."
Claire nodded. “It does seem like there are a lot of talented Quidditch players in the league,” she’d met with some of the other people from his world who were very into the sport. Claire enjoyed watching it. “And what are your aspirations, if they aren’t to be a Quidditch Star?”
"Me? Ah, well, let's see…" He was aware that his previous aspirations were null and void here. Somehow, being a lazy layabout living off his uncle's inheritance seemed very far away indeed. He needed a goal though, not having any would surely prolong this torture longer. "I dunno. I'd like to get married, I think. Maybe. Getting blown up does put your priorities in perspective."
“Are you thinking of asking Remus and Julia to marry you?” Claire asked not bringing up the comment of getting blown up, at least not yet. She wanted to see where the future thoughts Sirius had went first.
"I was," he said. "But I'm not sure. Even knowing the future, we don't know what COS will do next, right? Maybe it's not…" He gestured vaguely. "Meant to be?"
“That is one of the few downsides of seeing aspects of our future, it gets easy to over-focus on what should happen or what did happen in one timeline if you love them and that is what you want and they want, why let the future dictate what you do.”
Sirius paused. He'd never much believed in fate, but he'd also never had much of a reason to. His fate had long ago been cast off to forge his own path. He'd left behind his family to find his own version of family, a version that seemed to grow smaller with each passing day.
"But one future has to win out over the others, or we'd never… We'd never have the twins here." He missed Hope almost as much as he missed his brother. Maybe that was a sign of his impending madness. "Think I preferred not knowing any version of my future. Can't believe I'm going to say it, but life was easier then."
Claire smiled softly, she knew better than most seeing as one possible future she had twins with a psychopath. “There isn’t anything to say they aren’t part of your future, even if the future is different. The multiverse isn’t my strength or knowledge, but spending too much time worrying about the future you might miss what is right in front of you.”
Sirius sighed. He was loathe to admit, but she had a point. "Yea, alright," he agreed. He grinned softly. "Is that all this is? You telling me not to worry, and me going on about it?"
"It's a lot more work than that," Claire smiled softly before diving into the next questions.