Adelle DeWitt (iamverybritish) wrote in safeasthreads, @ 2010-01-09 03:29:00 |
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Entry tags: | adelle dewitt, laurence dominic |
Who: Adelle DeWitt and Laurence Dominic.
When: A couple nights ago.
Where: Their room.
What: A moment outside the chaos.
Adelle closed her eyes and just breathed, resting her forehead against the window of the room she was currently occupying in Alpha's haunted mansion...or magic mansion...whatever he was calling it this hour. "Everything's moving so quickly," she said. "I thought I knew what I was doing. I thought I knew how to protect them. But how do we keep them safe from this. They're people, yes, but they're also soldiers. And this is a war...one we cannot afford to lose." She wrapped her arms around herself, shivering slightly. "We can win this," she continued, "but at what cost. I've never lied when I said I cared about all my actives. I just want them safe. They entrusted their lives to me, and I can't help but feel I'm failing them continuously."
She opened her eyes and looked over her shoulder, her features half-hidden by the darkness of the room. "Do you believe that we can do this?" That I can do this was the unasked question they both heard.
Laurence could hear the doubt in her voice, just the tiniest hint that betrayed the cracks in her perfectly polished mask. Because Adelle DeWitt was one hell of a woman, but this? This was just insanity. His second time in the Attic, he'd stopped trying to reason. Nothing made sense in here. Nothing was what it appeared to be. No,, he thought. "Yes," he said. Hope was too vital to waste nowadays, even if the lie left a bitter taste in his mouth.
She smiled, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. She knew he was lying, that he didn't really believe it, but it was a lie she needed to hear. "This is going to be more dangerous than anything before," she said, "and this stopped being your fight a long time ago. Nobody would blame you if you left. The NSA could take you back." It was an offer she didn't expect him to take. But she wanted him to. She needed him safe as much as she needed him by her side. If she was the queen in this chess game, then he was her king as much as he was her knight. Losing him would mean the end of the game. "I don't expect you to take it...you're too noble for that, no matter what the others may think. But I wish you would. I don't know if I could handle it if something happened to you."
He stood behind her, close enough to betray any fiber of professional distance they'd once maintained. He wanted to reach out, to stroke her hand like a child and tell her that everything was going to be all right. But he couldn't quite bring himself to do it, to touch her or to repeat those words, so sentimental and maudlin, the horrible echo of the handler call tainting any comfort they might've offered. "I'm not going back," he replied, and for the hundredth time that day the Attic flashed through his mind. "But maybe I'll leave. I could. I should." It was almost a dare. "You could come." Because he knew it wass a long shot, but for the briefest of seconds, he could picture them away from all of this. But then it was gone.
The smile she gave him was almost sad as she turned to face him, a whisper of a deep sorrow under the resolve and the strength that she couldn't let slip. Something only he would ever see. "No," she said calmly. "I can't." But she wished she could. Wished that they really could have just been Adelle and Laurence, free of all the complications. Maybe in another life, but certainly not in this one. She reached up, gently tracing along the side of his face and down his jaw with the tips of her fingers. "I need you beside me," she admitted. "I don't know if I can do this. And I need someone on whom I can rely." When that had become him again, she couldn't really say, but it was.
For a moment, he just looked at her. Watched as she smiled, as she cupped his chin. But then he couldn't help but laugh, dark, angry chuckles the burst from his lips, just a little more raw than he'd intended. "Look at us," he breathed incredulously, "I betrayed you. You broke me." It was all so damn funny now, now that everyone was dead or slowly dying. Even though it wasn't. He looked into her face, saw the laugh lines and the worry lines and the red of her nightgown, reflected in her eyes. "I'll be there. Adelle. Ma'am." And Laurence Dominc never considered himself to be an emotional man, but despite all the madness, or maybe because of it, he punctured the words with a kiss. It's gentler than he'd expected, more careful than anything he'd thought himself capable of. Like the all-powerful Adelle DeWitt was a china doll, so fragile even the slightest touch could shatter everything he loved.
"It's who we are," she told him. "And this is bigger than either of us. The past is just that, and whatever we have done to one another pales in comparison to the current state of things. We cannot afford to consider personal concerns, not while Rossum is tearing the world apart." But there was a tiny part of her that was flattered that she had mattered enough to break him, even before this thing between them. She nodded at his assent, and then he was kissing her as if she were something delicate. And that gentleness was more than she could bear. "Come back to bed," she whispered against his lips. "The world will still be there in the morning, God willing." Both the world and the war would. And they would fight, but not just yet. She took hold of his hand and led him back toward the bed. She just wanted to sleep. Wanted him with her when she did to chase away the dreams that haunted her rest.