... You need to understand this, then. For your own sake.
The others won't forgive you. You're just making an impossible hurdle for yourself, putting a condition on your own effort when it is something you want to earn. Maybe it's just habit, to make every request a challenge. But this is your request. And you don't need everyone's forgiveness. Just mine.
If you help Red. If you make it possible for him to recover. If you want this enough to truly, honestly give him the key to fixing what you've done. If... if you save him...