[conquered Monoceros last night after he had to put down his giant eyeball tentacle slime chimera (with built-in death ray and real Kung-fu grip), and has been ruling it from a horizontal angle on your couch ever since]
[AND FOR THE RECORD HE WASN'T CRYING ABOUT IT THAT WAS JUST YOUR IMAGINATION AND MAYBE ALSO HE'S ALLERGIC TO YOUR STUPID FACE]