Re: [OBSERVATION]
That's the kind of resolve that'll let you keep your humanity. It's impossible to protect everyone, but if you don't let that break you, and own the choices you make, you'll do all right.
Unless there's more than one new person on your team, the person you replaced didn't vanish. He moved to the black team -- which isn't good, but better than the alternatives. His name's Geddoe; he's a friend of mine.