Coffee and Chitchat
Characters: Hannah and Becka Setting: Kitchen, morning
Despite as much sleep as Becka had got yesterday, she still managed to sleep past eight, and since the computer didn’t wake her up with a blaring alarm, she assumed there wasn’t anything dreadfully urgent that needed her attention. At least she wasn’t feeling quite so hung over now, having got through that throughout the day yesterday. Even so, she got up and showered before doing anything else, relieved when she got out that she was feeling far more normal than she had in the past few days. Today truly was a new day, and she was going to remember the advice Wren had given her a few days ago. She was going to stop trying to work out every little detail, and just deal with things as they came.
You can’t control everything, Becka, she told herself as she dressed for the day. It would be a good day, she was determined of it. Once dressed, she finally turned her computer on, made up her poll, commented on a few things, and then realized that it was already after nine. Apparently that conversation with Aaron ate up a lot more time than she’d realized! Wondering if Carmel might already be down in the kitchen starting breakfast, she decided to head down to see if she might need a hand with things. She’d spent more than enough time sulking, though she hated to admit that’s what she’d been doing, and now she wanted to get back to focusing on positive things.
Becka left her room, locking it behind her and tucking her key in her pants pocket. The storm seemed to be breaking up now, which seemed fitting, all things considered. She loved the smell of the earth after a good rain, and so she took the long way down, not realizing that her feet took the same path she’d taken just yesterday morning. As she reached the courtyard, though, she paused near the spot she’d knelt by Caroline’s body, taking a respectful moment of silence for the woman before moving on toward the kitchen.
After the bizarre day she had yesterday, Hannah took to locking herself up in her room. Well locking herself in it in every way but actually locking it. Her body was still sore and even though she had taken a shower the night before, she took a second one the moment she woke up from her two hour nap.
Taking her medications, she dressed herself in the thin light blue turtleneck sweater, choosing a longer white flowing skirt to go with it. Any damage that had been to her body was properly hidden from anyone who might notice it. That mark on her arm was going to take a couple of days to really go away. Still, Hannah needed to get dressed and out the door. It had been days since she had a proper meal and though she could try to live off of the scavenged foods of the farm, it was time to really fill her small belly with real food.
Taking a quick pace on her way, she noticed the figure of Becka in the distance across the courtyard. At least there was a familiar face that she trusted. Following her, which wasn’t her mission, Hannah caught up with Becka at the kitchen doorway. “Hey Becka,” she said a little quietly.
Becka wasn’t entirely surprised that she wasn’t alone in the courtyard, and even though her stomach twisted a little bit when she spotted Hannah and the other girl said hello, she was not about to admit that Hannah made her nervous. There was just no telling what kind of person Hannah had become from her experiences, which Becka was sure she didn’t even know the half of. She wanted to see the best in the other girl, though, and she really wanted to try to be a positive influence, to help Hannah see that she could decide where her life went now.
“Hey, Hannah,” she returned the greeting with a small, friendly smile. “I’m sorry that I haven’t seen you in a couple days. Things have been pretty crazy. How are you doing?” she asked, genuinely curious.
Hannah was good at hiding things. She had to be and anyway Ryan had made it clear that she better not have gotten him in trouble. Not that she would have willingly, she just had to take all precautions necessary. Returning with a smile herself, she clasped her hands at her back leisurely, “It’s ok, I haven’t felt like doing much lately.” She continued ahead a tad so as not to stop where they were. “Going to eat?”
“I hadn’t either,” Becka admitted, wrinkling her nose a bit. “But I’m all geared up to getting back to doing things now. Just have to figure out what. I’m planning to be in the clinic today, though, give Cal a hand with things and all.” She should probably stop chattering so much, but she wanted to feel more normal, and chit-chat felt normal. “Oh, yes I am. Carmel mentioned eggs and hashbrowns, so I was going to see if she needed a hand,” she answered as she continued on in that direction with Hannah.
“Ah, I’ll come with you then,” Hannah returned, putting a little spring in her step to hide the small limp she had when on her own. She found the more that she put on a happy face, the easier it was to hide everything else. Which was probably for the best. “I haven’t eaten properly in days!” Her voice was full of forced emotion, but it was difficult to separate the facade from reality. “Oh hey, I heard someone died the other day...” Hannah’s voice lowered a tad, not wanting to sound excited about the matter, but she was definitely curious, “Is that why you’re going to the clinic?”
Becka glanced over at Hannah with a concerned expression at the admission. “That’s not good,” she commented, though she wasn’t going to lecture Hannah on proper nutrition. She would just try to keep an eye out and subtly encourage the other girl to eat properly. It would mean more time spent with her, but she was certain she could get over the little bit of anxiety Hannah made her feel in order to be a good friend. “No, no that’s not why. Cal has already taken care of Caroline as much as he could, and the Administration have presumably removed her from the clinic in order to return her to her family. I just want to help Cal in the clinic as much as I can. It’s nice to have those familiar tasks, since I was a nurse before,” she explained.
“I know,” Hannah relayed, hearing half a dozen voices brate her in her head for not eating. It wasn’t like she did it on purpose, it was just going to take a long time for her to really learn how to take care of herself.
She nodded as Becka spoke about the clinic. It must have been nice to have something familiar. Maybe in a way she could understand why Hannah had done what she did with Ryan yesterday... but she wasn’t about to test it. She knew better than to think that it wouldn’t have been seen as completely insane. “Oh, well I can understand that,” she followed, “I would hope there isn’t a whole lot of need for the clinic though. Other than runny noses and that kind of stuff...” Of course then there was Caroline. She hoped that wouldn’t become a common issue.
Becka hummed softly in agreement. Yes, she did hope that the clinic wouldn’t be needed for anything more than normal ails, aches, and pains, but judging from what had already happened, she really wasn’t sure hoping would keep things calm in the clinic. “Hopefully,” she agreed, not wanting to dim the hope Hannah had for it. When she went into the kitchen, she saw that Carmel was already there, and she smiled at her and said hi before moving to the coffee pot that Carmel had already got going and getting a mug out to pour herself a cup. “Do you want some too?” she offered Hannah, unsure whether or not the other girl even drank coffee.
“Sure,” Hannah replied, staring hard at the pot before spitting out her answer. There was something just too awful she could relate to coffee for the rest of her life. Skin burnt so well with a fresh pot. Her face grimaced for a split second before shaking it off. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been really on my own,” she said, “I mean it’s kind of weird. What should I do here?”
The vagueness of the question didn’t go unnoticed by Hannah herself, but she wasn’t quite sure she meant it any other way. Whatever answer Becka gave her was probably going to be a part of the bigger picture. She had no idea what she should do next. Having fun was never something she really got to do unless it was induced by command, such as learning the piano. That was probably the highlight of her time. Yet she couldn’t spend all her time in the music room.
Becka glanced at Hannah at the answer, thinking that something seemed off in her expression, especially at that very brief grimace. She really didn’t think she wanted to know what had brought out that expression, even though that made her feel guilty. What Hannah had gone through and done because of it, though, was beyond her comprehension, beyond her ability to even attempt figuring out how to help. “Oh, I... Well, I lived with my parents up until I was arrested, so this is the first time I’m really on my own,” she explained as she poured coffee for them both. “So I’m feeling kinda lost, too, but I guess you just find ways to keep busy. Try new things, take up new hobbies, try to figure out what you like doing,” she suggested, trying to gear her answer toward Hannah’s unique circumstances.
“Ahh,” Hannah said, thinking back on her life as a kid. She took the cup of coffee and blew on it, choosing to keep it black. “When I was younger, my family used to get together once in awhile and watch bad movies. You know, horribly directed and cheesy,” she explained, “We should do that sometime. Any friends you got... have them get together. I hear there’s a pretty big activity room in this place.”
She took a small sip of the blackened liquid, remembering the laughing voices of each of her siblings. It wasn’t even close to a fond memory anymore, but a memory it was.
Although Hannah kept her coffee black, Becka doctored hers with sugar and creamer before taking a small sip, wrinkling her nose when it was still a bit too hot. She blew on it and then took another small sip. She grinned at Hannah’s suggestion. “Oh, my family did stuff like that all the time, too,” she replied. “But yeah, we should totally do that sometime. Even if it’s just the two of us. Though - have you met anyone else that you’ve clicked with?” she asked curiously, wondering who Hannah had interacted with so far.
The question caught Hannah a little off guard. She took a large sip of the hot coffee and swallowed it with difficulty. Letting out a big breath of air to combat against the heat, she took in another sharp breath, trying to sort out her own reply. “I’ve met a few people,” Ryan was at the bottom of her list to mention. It definitely would have sounded weird if she suddenly said she had made friends with him, even if she didn’t consider them so. It was a lie either way. “The guy next to my room, Rusty, but he’s a little odd,” as if she wasn’t weird at all, “and that’s about it. Though I did talk to Ryan the other day in the stocks...” Met was an understatement for what came of it.
There was something there, Becka thought with some curiosity as she watched Hannah closely. She just couldn’t get a good handle on the other girl, and it unsettled her a bit. “Oh, I haven’t met Rusty yet.” She was curious about how he was if even Hannah found him odd, though she felt guilty for that thought right away and took a drink of her coffee to try to hide her frown. “Did you? How did that go?” she asked, trying for a neutral tone. She was beyond confused about Ryan, but she really didn’t want to talk about what had happened yesterday.
Hannah shrugged slightly. “I don’t know really,” she said falsely, “He seems to hold up a good facade.” Though maybe it wasn’t the best idea to state he had a facade, but she didn’t really think there was much to dwell on about it. “I just don’t trust him,” she added, which was in a way entirely true, “But I don’t trust a lot of people...” Again, she was sticking to the truth. Her eyes cast down, taking another small sip of her coffee.
Becka’s brows furrowed in thought at Hannah’s answer. Ryan was just a huge question mark to her. She still didn’t believe his confession was the complete truth, but she couldn’t deny that he’d been very nice and helpful toward her yesterday. “Sometimes trust doesn’t come easy, and it’s easily broken, but I hope you know you can trust me,” she offered with a small smile. “For what it’s worth? I don’t really trust him either.” Even if a part of her really wanted to.
“Good,” Hannah interjected immediately. For all they had done, she definitely knew she was playing with fire and even though she had barely gotten to know Becka, she wanted that girl having no part in Ryan’s game. “But maybe we can get those people you’re cool with to come for a group movie or something,” she reiterated, “Though I guess it wouldn’t be very fair to not invite everyone.” Not that Hannah grew up being selective, but she still felt a little nervous giving a free invitation to just anyone who may have been.. well like Ryan.
The way Hannah immediately said that made the crease in Becka’s brow deepen a bit. There was something off about her, but she just couldn’t put her finger on what it was. “Maybe! There’s a lot going on right now, but maybe once things settle down, we could open it up for a larger group. Right now? I think a smaller thing might be better. And I’m not sure they have movies in the activity room? You should check later and let me know. I know the computers are all stocked up with movies and shows, so we might have to do it in one of our rooms, and there really wouldn’t be a lot of room there. And I’m rambling now, so...” She cut herself off, chuckling under her breath at herself and taking a sip of her coffee.
The way Becka went on caused a smile to erupt on Hannah’s face. “Yeah, I suppose we could always request a few movies if they don’t have any... they do that, right? I heard people were making requests for different things pretty often.” She definitely had to ignore the look in Becka’s face when she followed her reaction to not trusting Ryan. He made it clear that getting him in trouble would end bad for her and she knew how to follow instructions all too well.
Becka felt herself relax even more at Hannah’s smile. She wanted to see the other girl smile more because even though Hannah had done a lot of horrible things by her own admission, Becka knew that it had been a result of her kidnapping and the conditioning and training to do those things that she must have gone through. It made her sick to think about, and so she just tried not to, but she still hoped that Hannah would find some way to heal and go on to have some kind of a normal life. “Yeah, they do do that! I requested a quilt from home, and they even got that for me, which was pretty amazing. So yeah, if they don’t already have movies in there, we can totally request some,” she agreed enthusiastically.
Nodding, Hannah felt much more at ease shifting off the topic of people she didn’t trust. “Maybe I’ll go check out that activity room and if they don’t have anything I’ll request a couple movies,” she said with a bit of a thoughtful tone. “Got any favorites I should request if need be?”
“Oooh!” Becka bit her lip, expression turning thoughtful at the question. “Gosh, there are so many! Let me think about it, check out what might be in the activity room, and we’ll go from there,” she suggested.
“Alright,” Hannah agreed, “Why don’t I head over there right now. I’m feeling adventurous.” Somehow she was telling the exact truth. Perhaps there was something about what she had done with Ryan that gave back a bit of confidence in her. She wasn’t as afraid of everything like she was before it. Cautious, yes, but simply just afraid... the sense of being home freed her of a load of paranoia. It was invigorating.
Becka gave Hannah a look, waggling a finger at her jokingly. “You need to eat!” she reminded her with a little laugh. “At least grab something to munch on on the way.” Because Hannah had said that she hadn’t eaten properly in a few days, and that really concerned her, so she was going to look out for her as best she could.
“Sure thing,” Hannah replied with a widening smile. At least someone was on top of things with her health, otherwise she might’ve just wasted away. Taking Becka’s advice, she reached over to the bowl of fruit near by, grabbing an apple from it. “I’ll see you later maybe?”
“Definitely,” Becka replied, glad at least that Hannah was going to eat the apple, though she did wish she would eat something a little more substantial. Maybe she would make sure she got a good meal at dinner time. “And feel free to message me or something. Really hoping things are going to be quiet in the clinic today.”
“Alright, I’ll let you know what I find,” Hannah returned, taking another sip of her coffee. She thought about leaving it but her sleep hadn’t exactly been the best, so she decided to take it with her, giving a little wave with her fingers as she left.