Conner Reece (reece_con) wrote in rrinitiative, @ 2012-11-01 00:14:00 |
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Entry tags: | cal, cal and reece, cal and violet, day seven, group, reece, violet |
Where were you going?
Characters: Reece and Cal, later Violet
Setting: The clinic, morning
Reece had helped Brady carry Caroline down following after Cal, but when Brady left, Reece lingered longer. That was her, Caroline, under a bloody sheet. It just didn’t seem right. He moved towards the top of it, wanting to see her face. He lifted the edge of the sheet gently, but didn’t quite get all the way to the point where he could see it. I hope you remember me fondly. How could he not? Especially not now. Too many memories were surfacing. Blood pooling around his fingers, surprised at how warm it had been. It was painful, remembering it, and his eyes fell closed, letting out a sigh.
Both men were laboring under what had happened, under the fresh new burden of realization. They could die here, just like Caroline had. The difference between Reece and Cal, really, was their methods of coping. While Reece lingered by the body, fighting old memories and struggling not to look at the ruins of Caroline’s form? Cal was diving headfirst into the work before him, burying his dread and apprehension under professional duties.
Heading from the supply room with a stack of pads and several bottles of saline stuffed in his arms, Cal slowed as he spotted Reece by the body on the examination table. “You don’t gotta stick around for this, man,” he warned somewhat gently. “I know it’s a helluva thing to deal with. I’ll get her cleaned up...” Which may have been pointless, Caroline was dead after all, but it was all Cal could do now.
Reece had forgotten about the other man, assuming for a moment that he was alone, but the voice shook him from a memory he hated reliving and in some way he was grateful for it. Guilt shone in his eyes when he looked back at Cal, something that he refused to show, fought against daily. It was easier to shut off, to stop thinking about his friends, and how maybe he was responsible for their deaths than to deal with it, but now it was all bubbling up to the surface.
“It doesn’t feel right to leave either,” he admitted, voice rougher with emotion than it normally would have been. He wasn’t going to cry, not over this, but he was feeling raw and exposed for the first time in a long time. “I liked her. Thought she was kind of amusing to be around.” He sighed and looked back at the sheet for a moment before focusing on Cal again. “Can I help?” He wasn’t entirely sure he was cut out for this, but he was willing to try. It wasn’t like anyone besides the doctor was rushing to help.
“Truth?” Cal asked, watching Reece as he began to tear open packages and douse one with fluids, “You can, but you might not want to. This kind of thing’s not easy, man. Don’t feel like you have to, and if you’re set on it then grab a pair of gloves.” He nodded to the box of latex gloves nearby, moving to Caroline’s body with a damped cleaning pad in one hand and sighing. “I never got to really talk with her, you know? Not properly. Maybe could’ve kept her from trying this if I had,” he said regretfully, starting to ease the sheet back with a worried glance Reece’s way.
Cal was right, it might not be easy, but while Reece didn’t grab a pair of gloves yet, he didn’t leave either. “When they arrested me I was trying to save my friend’s life. He’d gotten shot in the robbery. I didn’t even know what I was doing, I was just trying to get the bleeding to stop.” They’d cuffed him like that, covered in Marshall’s blood. It was hours later before he had a chance to wash it off and his mug shot from the arrest showed him covered in it.
“We only talked once. She didn’t want to be here. She was cute, kinda guarded I guess, but she already had her eyes set on what was next, how quickly she could get out of here.” Which might have been what happened. “I wasn’t so sure I was ever leaving, wasn’t sure I wanted too, so she told me to remember her fondly when she was gone.”
Slow and careful, Cal peeled the top of the sheet back, reaching in to pluck away errant strands of hair that clung to it bloodily. She’d been young, not much older than either him or Reece, and that drew out pangs of sympathy as Cal wondered over her desperation in attempting that climb. “Wish I could say it was easier to cope with that sort of thing when you had trainin’,” he offered, gently swiping at Caroline’s forehead to wipe away dirt and grime. “But I’ve been there before, man. When someone’s fadin’ out, there’s nothing in the world that makes it easy bein’ there for them.”
It was probably no comfort, not against Reece’s direct experience in his past, but Cal had to try as he kept cleaning the body on the table. “And I’d say that if that’s what she told you, hang onto it,” he continued, wiping one cheek clean before discarding his gauze and grabbing another. “Caroline made her choice, Reece. We see now that it was a bad one, but you can’t let that pull down her intent in what she said. This place... we gotta stick with it if we want anything more than a cell.” Or a slab.
Reece managed to watch for a moment before he felt his breath go out of his lungs and he wasn’t sure he could stand. After a few steps he dropped into a nearby chair, elbow propped on one knee as he rubbed at his face, stubble scratching his hand. It was sickening to see her so lifeless, but Reece couldn’t pull himself away. “I know she did. I’m not one to think that what happens to people isn’t a result of the choices they make, but...damn.” He leaned back in the chair more, running a hand through his hair. “She’s dead.”
“And we can’t waste what that’s showin’ us,” Cal agreed, staying at his work as he wiped Caroline’s face and neck clean, gradually working the sheet down. It was going to be bad under here, he knew; probably compound fractures working across her body, skin tears and dislocations that always brought out just how frail the human body could be. “This is real, Reece. This place, these tests or whatever we should call ‘em? We can’t get clear from it, you know?” he asked as he worked, “No one asked us to come here, no one’s askin’ if we want to leave. That means the best we got in here is each other. I don’t think Caroline believed that, I think she jus’ wanted to keep to herself.” He sighed quietly, grimacing a bit at the shattered and pulped flesh that had been her shoulders and collarbone. “Keepin’ to ourselves just means no one’s close enough to help, though. Maybe it’s time we started stickin’ together.”
He could still see her from where he sat, though as Cal worked Reece was relieved that he’d moved farther away. His stomach turned twice, but he held it down. Later he’d drink it away but for right now he didn’t feel right leaving her alone. “She wanted what was outside of here, what was waiting. She talked about it.” Maybe that was why she’d tried and to scale the wall. Reece rubbed his forehead for a moment then sunk more in the chair. “You think we can convince the others here of that? If I could tell was what going on correctly they were voting about what to do yesterday.” And split down the middle.
“I think we gotta try, man. Even if there’s no agreement, it’s better than jus’ doin’ nothing,” Cal stressed quietly, grimacing again as he brought one of Caroline’s arms up under the sheet and rested it across her stomach, ignoring the tip of bone jutting from just above her elbow. “What we’re gonna see if and when someone tries is a whole lotta arguin’ about the how of it, about what sort of organization we end up in. There’ll be some folks who buck the whole idea, who won’t want anyone that ended up in here callin’ the shots, and there’ll prolly be a few who’re too spooked to weigh in,” he rattled off, swabbing her hand clean before Cal let the sheet settle and looked to Reece. “Thing is, that sort of thinkin’ is why we had that mess yesterday. If we don’t provide ourselves a structure, then we only get the one they give us. And we both know how that’s been goin’.”
Reece watched Cal, trying not to focus on his work, but what he was saying. It sounded important at the very least, though the more he thought about it, the more he thought Cal had a point. “I have to say, I’m one of the ones who’d buck against someone in here being in charge. I’m not sure I trust any of them enough.” He glanced at Cal then added. “No offense.” Cal was one of the few that Reece trusted more than once, even if he’d had minimal interaction with him. He just seemed good at holding his own, like he knew how to compose himself. “Maybe that’s what they want, for us to find a leader.”
Cal nodded thoughtfully at that, though his eyes were still fixed on the table, and the body on it. It had been a long time since medical school, but thankfully he’d never grown squeamish even in that absence. “Could be, could be,” he agreed, “The catch there’s the old adage about givin’ too much power to one person. And in here, maybe it’s not so much? But it’s still a risk. Still, one leader or a senate of ‘em, we need somethin’ to focus this whole group at once when trouble hits.”
That much was just common sense, and one of the things that had baffled Cal since the first day. With no guards or warden, who did they look to for answers? The terminals? That clearly hadn’t worked. “But like you say, man, who’s gonna get the trust in here? Got us some high-profile sorts rollin’ around these halls, fuckin’ Antoine Pickett, Meg Ravin, Zhang Wu Ji? None a’them is someone I’d want makin’ my calls.”
“I’m sure as hell not the type to do any leading,” Reece pointed out, knowing that much about himself. The last part had him looking up, face changing. “Antoine...what do you know about Wu?” He’d been in prison for five years and getting news wasn’t ever a priority in Reece’s life, why would it start when he was locked up?
“Way I hear it, dude used to be a shot caller,” Cal answered as he worked, grateful for the change in topic. It let him make the body on his table more of a clinical thing, a task that just... needed to be taken care of. “Headed up some pretty serious mob shit out in New York, got a lot of red in his ledger if you catch my drift.” Which was really the short version of what he’d read in his time, but there was too much to share casually. “Papers made it sound like what he got busted for was less than half of what he pulled. Dude’s been mellow so far, but that don’t mean he’s gonna stay that way. Tiger’s a tiger, you know?”
Reece opened his mouth to answer then frowned and settled back against the chair. “I had a good feeling not to fuck with him. Though I wonder what it says about me that I like the guy.” They weren’t best friends but he did enjoy the other man’s company. “What about the other two?”
“Antoine? Motherfuck the guy, man,” Cal was quick to reply, looking over with a scowl and a shake of his head. “Straight-up goddamn cannibal, and I’m not playin’ on that. That fool literally killed and ate like twelve people. If you’re tight with anyone in here, start usin’ the buddy system with ‘em when that boy’s around.” He should’ve found Antoine fascinating, and many people with his training would’ve. But Cal? He knew permanently damaged goods when he saw them. “Meg Ravin, now... she’s probably less likely to try eatin’ your foot, but the girl’s still wildfire. Went on one hell of a crime spree with her boyfriend, he was in here with us too ‘til he got pulled.”
“Please tell you’re joking. He’s here? They let him here with us?” Reece asked. Sure he’d been brought up on somewhat murder chargers, Wu might have killed people, but he didn’t eat anyone. “Jesus Christ that’s fucked up.” Reece ran a hand over his head and fought the urge to throw up again. “Was he out there? With her?” He nodded towards Caroline, glad as hell that she didn’t have teeth marks on her. “Crime spree. Damn. We are quite the group aren’t we?”
“You really think I’d be crackin’ a joke ‘bout that?” Cal asked rhetorically, head shaking before Reece could answer. “But yeah, he was. Him and Becka, I guess she found Caroline first. Best believe I got her clear of that boy fast.” Still, he had enough insight into pathologies similar to Antoine’s to not be looking over his shoulder constantly. It didn’t put him at ease, but it did bleed off the nerves that would otherwise threaten to crack him. At Reece’s last question, Cal had to silently wonder if that wasn’t the point of the program; to mix wildly different convicts and see who wanted genuine change, who would be catalysts, who would burn themselves out early...
With Caroline’s body on the table, it was far too paranoid and somber a thought to share. “Hell yeah we are,” Cal finally agreed, “It’s why I’m thinkin’ the sooner we all sit down and figure out some kind of system, somethin’ like a society, the better off we’ll all be.”
That had Reece getting up, moving back towards Cal, frowning at the site of her. “Sounds like he need a meeting or something.” He reached out briefly, touching her hand where it lay against her chest.
“Think I’d have to agree,” Cal replied smartly, bumping his glasses back up his nose with his forearm. “That’ll be when the headache starts, though. Folks not showin’ up, complainin’ that they didn’t get their voices heard... gonna be an uphill battle, man. And I’m no fighter,” he added with a smirk. “I’m just the clean-up crew.”
“I’m more of a soldier myself I think,” Reece said, slipping his fingers under Caroline’s, holding her hand for a moment. “Better than doing nothing though right?”
Violet had headed directly for the clinic after her message from Becka. So, she arrived promptly, heading into the clinic. "Reporting for duty." she said, note in her voice somber, considering the circumstances. "Becka is taking some mental health time." she said, just so people wouldn't think she was shirking her duties.
Cal looked up from Caroline’s body at Violet’s arrival, just a flicker of a smile touching his lips. It was good to see her on multiple levels, both for the help and the steadfastness she was putting out. “Hey Vi,” he greeted with a nod, “Glad you came on down.” Nodding first at her, then to Reece, Cal withdrew his hands from the body and started to peel his gloves off. “Violet, Reece. Reece, Violet,” he introduced for them, moving for a fresh pair of gloves.
Reece had seen her, but only in passing, and as he was introduced he pulled his hand away from Caroline’s as well, offering up a half wave. There might have been something for him to say or to give her more than the sad half smirk he managed but at the moment Reece didn’t know what it was, so he left it at that.
Giving Cal a nod and subtle smile, she turned to greet Reece as well. "Hello." she said. "Pleased to meet you, I wish it were under better circumstances." she said politely. "Did you know the deceased well?" she asked, getting herself situated closer to the girl, giving her a glance over to take in as many details as she could in short order.
Stepping back with his new pair of gloves, Cal moved for the bottle of water he was already tending to keep at his desk, twisting the cap open for a drink. He was in no rush to glove up, Reece needed a moment and it seemed like Violet might have some skill with reassurances. It wasn’t like there was much else to do, either; they couldn’t do more for Caroline’s remains than a cursory cleanup, and all of her injuries were plainly in line with what Cal had been told happened.
“Does anyone know anyone well here?” Reece said, eyes ticking back to her hand, wanting to take it again. Like one simple touch might breathe life back into her. Shaking his head he glanced up at Violet for a moment. “We talked once. I was hoping we’d do it again. She told me to remember her fondly when she left. I just didn’t think she’d leave like this.”
Violet let her eyes rest on Reece, looking sympathetic. "I'm sorry for your loss." she told him, finding it not at all an overstatement, even if Reece didn't know her that well. People connected sometimes, and that was all. Clearly he'd had feelings in place, regardless of what flavor they were, they appeared strong. "Abrupt departure of people we know and appreciate is always difficult to deal with." she told him, validating his feelings on the matter.
Reece wrapped his arms around himself instead, frowning as he fought back feelings. He didn’t need this, nor did he want sympathy. He hadn’t earned it before, he was sure he hadn’t earned it now. He gave Violet a terse nod in thanks, but the words weren’t said. Turning back to Cal he took a step away from Caroline. “There was...blood on the wall. Do I need something special to clean that up?” It didn’t seem right to leave it there.
The body language on display made it clear that Reece wasn’t going to let himself be consoled, so for the moment Cal was willing to let it end with Violet’s attempt. “Easiest thing’s probably bleach,” Cal answered. “Hot water and bleach, give a good scrub and it should clean up.” At least to the naked eye, which would hopefully set Reece’s mind at ease. “If you need a hand whenever you opt for doin’ that, lemme know,” he added belatedly, just barely smiling in reassurance. “Lord knows I don’t get much call for reachin’ up these days, but I’m pretty sure I could still manage if it’s out of your reach.”
Violet let the men talk, starting to get prepared for helping with Caroline. She got herself to the sink, scrubbed up, then went in search of gloves small enough to work for her. She kept her ears open, of course, for any hint she may be needed, but for the moment, it looked like things were under control.
Nodding at the instructions Reece, let his eyes fall back on Caroline’s lifeless body again. With Violet stepping away, he let himself touch her broken hand again, lightly dragging his thumb across knuckles. It was too much, at least for right now it was too much. Pulling his hand away he nodded towards Cal. “I think I have it under control. Ya’ll have her to take care of.” For a few words his accent was stronger, though always present, something had it coming out just a little thicker. He patted Cal’s shoulder as he left the clinic, headed to gather what he’d need to clean up the stain on the building.
Watching Reece head out, Cal aimed a small, sad smile at the other man’s back. He said nothing in parting, doubting Reece would even acknowledge it. With a turn to look back to the body on his table, Cal sighed and moved for one more gulp of water before he pulled his gloves on with a snap. He withdrew the sheet from Caroline’s remains entirely, pooling it up in both hands and stuffing it into the garbage, then rounded the table once more to reclaim his wipes. “Vi, when you’re ready I’d like a blood sample,” he called after Violet, “I’m gonna have the folks in charge run a toxicology screen, wanna be sure this was what it looks like.”
"Right away." Violet said, determined to set in and do whatever it took to get through this as quickly and thoroughly as possible. She was a woman who was all about getting things done, and she was about to prove that.
As he set back to work cleaning Caroline’s remains, Cal felt the burden of it all settle back onto his shoulders and had to wonder how many of the others felt similarly. This was a stark reminder of the lines that had been drawn; that whatever freedoms and luxuries they were given, they were still prisoners. He wondered if that thought was what had broken Caroline, if maybe he could’ve prevented this by just talking with her.
“Where were you gonna go?” he murmured near-inaudibly, gentle and careful as he swabbed grime from her and worked away the dirt she’d picked up when she hit the ground. It had to have been a desperate move, given how little they knew about what real security there was here. Except that now, because of this? They knew there was a helicopter to go with the guards who’d taken Dominic.