InsaneJournal

Little Quirks
Characters: Matt and Autumn
Setting: spiritual room

Autumn was so far having a good time. It was strange to even think about, having a good time in a place she couldn't leave, that was technically still prison-like. But she was. She'd had fun conversations on the journals, she had met Mazie who was awesome, and it was a gorgeous day. After she put in a request to the administration, or wardens or whoever, she went for another exploratory walk, deciding to check out the 'spiritual room'. While she'd never been especially religious herself, she still wanted to see what it was they provided, out of sheer curiosity.

Ducking into the room, she smiled as she looked around, almost halfway through the room before she noticed that she wasn't alone. When she did, she startled, jumping a little, hand flying to her chest as she burst out laughing at herself. "Oh god you scared me!" she said, smiling brightly at him and her own silly folly.

Matt had yet to make it off level two but after circling it twice, his map was already dotted with coloured marks, not that they would have meant anything to anyone else looking at it. He hadn't crossed paths with anyone else yet, a fact he was quite happy about, and had just stepped back into the spiritual room to go over what he'd written before heading downstairs.

He certainly hadn't expected anyone to come into the room while he was in there and so when Autumn did just that, he panicked for a moment before instinctively backing into the corner. He was about to try and slide out of the room when she turned around and saw him.

He smiled at her apologetically and ducked his head, slipping the map into his pocket and he did so. "S...s...sorry I s...startled you," he said, not quite looking at her as he spoke.

Oh, wasn't he just a skittish little thing? Autumn smiled at him, ducking her own head a little bit, though it wasn't to avoid his gaze, it was to capture his. "It's not your fault! I'm just not as observant as I thought, I suppose. Hi. I'm Autumn, sorry I damaged your calm, or whatever, I didn't mean to come barging in like a bull in a china shop." she apologized herself.

Autumn, room 17. Very chatty on the journals, one of the people who had spoken to him, his mind quickly provided. Of course now he had a face to put to the name and there was no ignoring the fact that it was a pretty one.

"It's okay," he said hesitantly, tugging his sleeves down over his knuckles. "I wasn't praying or meditating so..." Belatedly he realised he should introduce himself and lifted his head slightly to look at her properly. "I'm Matt."

When he looked up, she stood straight, and she connected the name with the shoes. "Blue hoodie! You're shy!" she said, latching onto the fact that she had, in fact, said hello earlier on the journals. "Nice to meet you." she said warmly, reaching out her hand to shake his.

"You remembered," he said, torn between being pleased she had and vaguely embarrassed by the way she'd just announced it like that. When she held out her hand, the embarrassment grew as force of habit made him try take a step back only to find himself already against the wall. "I don't sh...sh...sh...shake hands," he stammered, pulling his sleeves down even further. "It's nice to meet you too though, r...really it is."

"Oh," Autumn said, letting her hand drop back down immediately, as to not draw out the awkward moment. "Okay then." she added, giving him a reassuring smile to let him know she wasn't taking offense. And the stammer was pretty bad, she noted. She took a step back, feeling like she was making a situation worse, even if she thought she might be the least intimidating person ever. "So," she started. "I promise I don't bite?" she suggested, looking sheepish. “Sorry if I’m a bit much right now. I’m just in a great mood, maybe I’m a little over the top.”

Physically speaking, Autumn wasn't intimidating, not by a long shot but she was still largely an unknown entity and the first woman he'd spoken to in over five years who wasn't his mother. So there was a lot of nervousness kicking around him.

He could see the effort she was making though and that helped him relax a little, if not a lot, and he managed to shoot her a shy smile. "It's fine really; a new place, a totally different kind of place, it's understandable that people would be excited."

"And maybe a little nervous." she said, since that was what he appeared to be. But her tone was completely understanding. She glanced around again, just to help take the focus off of him, to continue aiding the effort to make him feel more at ease. "This room is nice. I'm not really religious myself, but it's got a nice atmosphere." she commented.

“Maybe a little,” he admitted, running a hand through his hair. “But even so it is interesting, being here. The fact that there’s a here to be.” As she looked around the room, he kept his eyes on her through his fringe, only letting them drop when her attention came back to him. “It does,” he agreed. “Very calming. I can see me spending a lot of time in here.”

"I know, right?" Autumn agreed pleasantly. "There could be a way to get through this! And before I'm in my fifties!" she said, bouncing on the balls of her feet slightly. She even twirled around a little and beamed at him. "I will promise to keep my exuberance apart from the area of calm." she told him, poking fun at herself.

Matt wasn’t sure when he had last met someone so positive and as much as it was a shock to the system, he couldn’t deny that it was also appealing and in the face of that, his smile grew a little stronger. “I don’t know, a little exuberance is definitely a good thing,” he said. “Even in here, helps bring the place to life.”

"That's the spirit!" Autumn said, stepping closer again. "So, what is Matt about?" she asked curiously, sitting down cross legged on the nearest chair. She focused on him, liking getting to know people, and he seemed shy and like he might need someone to focus on him.

For all that he was an introvert, he wasn’t especially introspective so her question threw him a little. “What do you mean?” he replied, moving around to claim a chair for himself, one that allowed him to see both her and keep an eye on the door.

Autumn gave a smile. "What are your interests? Where are you from, what do you do..." she trailed off. "Who are you?" she prompted, making a vague gesture meant to convey 'so on and so forth'. "What makes you tick?"

“Oh,” he said, flushing slightly. “Sorry, I don’t talk about myself much...or ever really.” He smiled crookedly and ran a hand through his hair. “Errr, well, I’m from Rhode Island and was a librarian at Roger Williams which is where I went to school, majored in journalism. I really like photography...” He trailed off, unsure what else to say and not entirely comfortable talking about himself. “How ‘bout you?”

"Oh, journalism and photography, that's really interesting!" she said. "And libraries, I usually really love the architecture of them. What sort of photography do you do or like?" she asked, happy with latching onto something positive there. It was easy to talk about artwork. It was all subjective, and she did actually find it interesting.

His blush deepened, Autumn’s interest in him pushing him way out of his comfort zone. “P...p...portraits mostly, not the p...p...” He stopped and took a breath. “Not the posed kind though, more like slice of life kind of thing?” Like the subject doesn’t even know you’re there. “That said, I really like Diane Arbus’ stuff. I did my dissertation on her my final year.”

“Like snapshots?” Autumn asked. “I think I get what you mean. I love those too. Posed pictures are just...” she paused. “They lack something. Spark?” she suggested, laughing at herself. “I don’t know. I get it, though. I think the nicest photograph of a person I ever saw was one where you couldn’t even see the subject’s face. It was in heavy shadow, with the bright light of the moon on the ocean in the background. Probably not something that would win awards or anything, but I certainly loved it. What’s Diane Arbus’ artwork like?”

"Kinda," he replied, grateful she wasn't pushing for more details because the truth about his photography was that for the most part qualified as the behaviour of a stalker, something he was all too aware of. He smiled as she went on though, pleased she seemed to understand what he'd meant. "Well Arbus did do classic style portraiture but it was her choice of subject that made her famous; circus performers, dwarves. She saw something beautiful in people normally shunned by society."

He shrugged again, that pervasive air of awkwardness still hanging off him like a blanket. "But enough about me, tell me about you?"

“Oh I really like that.” Autumn said to his description of Arbus’ subject matter. “That’s beautiful. I feel the same way about people, really. There’s something in everyone that’s more than worthwhile. I like seeing who people really are, and it’s always easy for me to find something I like, something I find beautiful or unique.” she explained. When he turned the subject back to her, she smiled. “What would you like to know?” she asked. “I’m an open book.”

It felt oddly validating to hear her say she liked it, most people he'd spoken to in the past failed to see the appeal of Arbus' work and he found himself warming further towards Autumn even if he found her a little intense. "Well I figure that makes you pretty unique yourself," he said, glancing up at her. "Not many people view the world that way." He was itching to know how she'd wound up in prison with a personality and an outlook like hers but was too polite to start with a question like that so he went with something less provocative. "What are your interests? Did you go to school? I mean obviously you went to school but college I mean."

“I know it’s not really a popular outlook,” Autumn said, laughing. “But I think the world’s become a pretty negative place. Or, maybe it was always like that? Only these days, people are more connected. Which means before, maybe you had a bad day and you vented to a friend over coffee. Now you can vent on the internet, and that negativity is there, kinda forever. So even years later, after you’ve forgotten what made you pissy in the first place, someone can go and read it and it’s just...there.” she said. “So, I have made it my mission in life to find the good in people. To work out what I find worthwhile. And honestly? It isn’t difficult. Not even a little bit.” she shared. “As for my interests...well, I love dancing, and I play the piano and violin. I really enjoy music. I couldn’t survive without it, I swear! College, I didn’t do. I considered it, very heavily, but I went to work instead, feeling my calling in that direction.”

As much as Matt disliked talking about himself, he genuinely enjoyed listening to people providing they were interesting and Autumn certainly qualified as that. So as disparate as her world view was from his own, he smiled and nodded as she explained it further. "A musician huh?" he said. "Can't say I'm overly surprised, you come across as being creative." To hear her say she had a calling was more surprising, purely because it was something he didn't hear often. "And what is it you were called to do?" he asked, curiosity piqued.

“Creative is one way to put it, I suppose.” Autumn said, reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ears. “And, to put it my way, I was a call girl. A very exclusive, very expensive one. I filled the blanks in certain people’s lives, which was pretty all over the place, generally speaking. I mean, obviously there was the sexual part of things, but that wasn’t the only function I served.”

Of all the things she might have said, 'call girl' couldn't have been further from his mind as a possibility and for a brief instance, he could only look at her in stunned silence. It didn't bother him exactly but to describe him as sexually inexperienced would be generous at best and the thought that the beautiful woman in front of him had sex for money was a boggling one, regardless if how much or little of her job it constituted.

"You must be very good with people then," he finally said, cringing slightly at how lame it sounded.

Autumn was used to that reaction. She expected it, really. So, she didn’t really react when he gave it, not rushing him through reacting either. She merely gave him whatever time he needed to formulate an answer. “It’s okay.” she told him. “Most people don’t really know what to say, or how to react. It’s not exactly like I’m a waitress or anything. Though, yes. I’m very good with people. I like people. I loved what I did, too.” She smiled at him. “Ever see Firefly?”

"Well that makes me feel a little better," he admitted, relief palpable. Uncomfortable as the subject matter was for him, he didn't want to make Autumn feel that was. At the sudden mention of Firefly, he had a moment of confusion before his mind connected the dots and he smiled back, starting to relax again. "Ah, Inara," he said with a nod. "I must confess to being more of a River fan myself."

"Her outlook most closely matches my own." Autumn told him. "It's the easiest way to get people to get what I'm talking about. And I loved River. But then I loved everyone in that show. It's hard not to love." she said easily. She'd watched through with a client. The same one she'd wound up playing a lot of video games with.

“It’s a good way to explain things,” Matt said, nodding in approval. “Assuming the person you’re talking to has good enough taste to have watched Firefly.”

Autumn laughed. "Basically!" she agreed, amused. "But yeah, that's me. A Companion, without the space ship and great clothes. At least while I'm in here, but I liked what they gave me. I'm just happy to be here, really. Happy to be here, happy to be meeting people, happy all around."

He chuckled a little. “Sounds more like Kaylee if you ask me,” he pointed out. “But given our lack of spaceship, I guess we’ll have to make do with what we’ve got. Wheel keeps turning as they say.” He smiled again.

Autumn beamed. "Oh I will take that!" she said pleasantly, pointing at him. "I will definitely take being Kaylee!" She laughed. "Yes, yes it does." she agreed. "So, new friend, what now?" she asked.

Feeling slightly uncertain, Matt rose to his feet, hand once again running through his hair. “Well...” he said hesitantly. “I haven’t been downstairs, maybe you could show me around?”

"Sure!" Autumn agreed readily, hopping up from her seat. "Though to be fair, I really haven't looked around much myself, so it'll be less showing you around and more us looking around together." she confessed. "But so long as you are okay without getting the full on flight attendant treatment...I mean, I can fake it, but I'd be making things up as I went along."

He shrugged. “Two people see more than one,” he pointed out, standing back so she could leave the room first. “And I can happily live without the flight attendant treatment, I figure enthusiastic ship’s mechanic tops it anyway.”

Autumn giggled at that. "OKay then." she said, heading out, then towards the stairs. She held the door for him this time, voice echoing slightly in the stairwell. "So, hopefully it doesn't weird you out too much...my history." she said. "And before you say anything! You don't have to say anything. I'm not grilling you on whether or not you're looking at me like I'm a..." she quirked a half smile. "You know. I just am sharing that I hope that it doesn't mean you think less of me."

Matt shook his head. “I don’t,” he replied simply and it wasn’t a lie; he certainly saw her differently than he had at first but not in a negative light. “So shall we?” He gestured into the hallway in front of them.

Autumn held out her elbow towards him for him to take, though she pulled up short after a moment. "You don't shake hands." she noted, so he didn't have to turn her down for the contact. "Sorry. I'm kind of an affectionate person, just fair warning. But I'll try very hard to keep in mind that you might not be so cool with that." she told him. "If I forget, feel free to verbally smack me upside the head."

The momentary surge in panic that came with her holding out her arm dropped back down almost as fast as she apologised, causing him to smile in the shy, awkward way that was so often his trademark expression. “I’ll bear that in mind,” he said, ducking his head once more. “It really isn’t personal though, I just had a really b...b...bad experience and since then I’ve not been great with touching.”

Autumn looked at him, clear sympathy on her face. “I’m sorry.” she told him genuinely, voice softer than it had been a moment before. “Don’t answer right now,” she added. “But if you ever want some help with that, I’d be more than willing to put in the time and effort.” she offered. “I’ve actually dealt with it before, at least in some fashion. I would guess not in the same way, but I’m not actually totally in the dark on the matter.”

Matt shrugged again, the hand that had slipped into his hoodie’s pocket pressing to the scar that lay beneath it. “I’ll bear that in mind,” he replied, flashing her that uncertain smile again; he had the feeling he’d given her the wrong impression of what had happened to him but for the time being he saw no reason to correct her. “Thank you.”

"You're welcome." she said. "Offer is open, so, just let me know if you're interested. If not, then I hope you find a different way to cope." she told him, heading down the steps two at a time. "But until then....behold! Our new home for...however long!" she announced with a flourish, opening the door at the bottom of the steps. They could go explore together, it'd be great. She was a happy camper.