Cos He Just Had to Ask Characters: Kyle and Leandro Setting: Outside of room 2, day 4, late night.
Long after the sun had gone down and the excitement of dinner in the kitchen had passed away, a lone rangy figure leaned up against the wall outside of room 2, his arm across his chest and the faint glow of a cigarette bobbing between his fingers. His face was posed to the sky, in which he could just make out a slice of the moon beyond the facility’s imposing walls. It bathed patches of the courtyard white and turned a ribbon of smoke from his lips into a fading ghost.
Smoking wasn’t his favorite habit, since it made his chest ache, but it did provide the excuse of lighting a match in public instead of doing it inside where the smoke tended to stay trapped. Plus, it was calming. The normally sharply-animated young man somehow managed to look contemplative then, a quiet veil over his eyes. It was only when he thought he heard footsteps that he looked aside. Leandro’s senses were sharp as a tack.
Kyle had taken a walk after he’d left Adam’s room, heading around the perimeter of the upper floor, waiting for the elevator and then walking the edge of the courtyard back towards his own room. It was clearly the long way round, but he needed some space and the air before he headed to bed. Maybe that was why he picked up the cigarette smoke so early, that alone giving him the heads up that he was about to no longer be alone.
He looked up and around, slowing as he caught sight of Leandro, not sure he was mentally prepared for this meeting, after the day he seemed to have had. Still, that fact in itself was nowhere near enough to have him be seen to be backing out of anything. “Hey,” he said, lightly. It was something, a start. Easy enough.
Leandro could guess who it was, more or less, by the time he was coming near. The fact delighted him, partly because he had meant to speak to him in a serious way and had somehow or another not managed to all day long, and also because he was intrigued to know what his friend from the bar would do now. They'd gotten off on an interesting foot.
Leandro pushed off the wall and stuck his cigarette between his lips one last time, taking a final puff before dropping it to the ground and squelching it out under the toe of one severe boot. That finished, he flicked his head back up and grinned toothily, opening his palms in invitation for the guy to continue his ascent over. "Hey, baby blue, I've been looking everywhere for you," he fibbed in his playful lilt, though this time gently. "How you doing?"
Kyle took a breath, his walls built back up again after his conversation with Adam. He steeled himself and continued his slower walk forward, arching an eyebrow as though nothing affected him, an almost blank look on his face. It covered a multitude of doubts and confusing and conflicting emotions. “Given how small this place is, I doubt you were looking very hard in that case,” he said, sarcastically. He had no comeback for the pet name, so he didn’t even try on that front.
Kyle seemed to like playing hard to get, as far as Leandro could tell so far. It had taken him a few messages back and forth online, too, to relax and take a chance with his words; it hadn't been lost on him that Kyle accused himself of babbling. It was unfortunate, because by all means he seemed interesting. Now he opened with sarcasm, and that was warming. Leandro took a step forward too, as if to be sure that Kyle didn't do that thing where people sometimes stopped a distance and a half away from people they didn't want to talk to, and once he was comfortable slid his hands into his jacket pockets.
"Yeah, well, you are a little elusive," he countered. "I thought you said you were up for anything. You make your own lines, and stuff. You're not playing me, are you?" Here Leandro rose his eyebrows – as if he hadn't already been playing the artist himself.
The question threw Kyle - he had been sure up until that moment that if anyone was playing, it had been the other way around. He stumbled mentally for a second, trying to catch whether there was anything at all serious in the question, or whether it was just another game, and for a flash some of that uncertainty showed in his expression before it closed up again.
“It’s been a busy day. Far too busy for me to play with anyone, especially you.” He took another breath and met Leandro’s eyes. “Why - did you think I was?” he asked, with an air of almost wide eyed innocence that was almost as sarcastic as his tone had been moments before.
What he'd said had apparently had the right effect, since that uncertainty flashing over Kyle's face was exactly what he'd intended to put there. He was sweet, probably, but Leandro didn't think he needed to plan out his words so; he didn't need to know what was coming next. It was fun that way.
Still, Leandro shifted on the heels of his boots as if Kyle's words affected him too. His hands pushed out inside of his pockets and tented the black cloth for a moment in either direction. "Well that's a damn shame. Especially me? But I'm such a good playmate." Dark eyes peered through the side-swept curtain of his hair, but he didn't exactly look half as innocent as Kyle did. That look of Kyle’s was a favorite look of Leandro's though. He liked that charm. "Maybe I did think so. You're so cold, after all, after I was so nice to you." Surprisingly, it was possible for that face to pout and pout it did, lip subtly stuck out.
There it was again. another statement which Kyle had no idea how to take. He'd used to think he read good at reading people. But that was before he'd met this man. "You think I'm cold?" he asked, despite his better judgement, which was screaming at him to keep firmly on the vague, elusive, sarcastic commentary, which would certainly do nothing to clear up his confusion, yet would not leave him open and vulnerable either.
That was an interesting question. Was Kyle concerned? Leandro wanted to smile for it, but instead he shrugged just as vaguely, lifting one shoulder up toward his cheek. "Well, you didn't really want to drink with me, and you don't want to play with me..." Briefly then he glanced back out over the courtyard, as if to hesitate. "I guess you're just really serious and way too busy for me. That's okay, I guess... but I didn't think you'd mind a little excitement. 'Cause you like to go your own way, and all."
Kyle half knew in the back of his mind that he was being manipulated. Even if that was just on balance of probabilities. The worst thing about it, he realised, was that it was working. He felt an almost driving need to defend himself and just go with whatever Leandro was proposing. Not because he wanted to, but just to avoid being labelled and uptight and boring.
Kyle sighed and ran a hand through his hair, messing it carelessly. "Fine. What did you have in mind?" he asked, sounding resigned.
Bingo. Leandro felt now that Kyle would finally be open to suggestion, even if in a resigned way. It wasn't exactly what he was aiming for – that being something more gung-ho – but this was a start. His smile returned, this one soft and close-lipped around the glimmer of his lip ring.
"Well..." he started. One hand stuck out of his pocket and pointed towards the door they were standing in front of. "This is my room. It's awfully late, so it's no use running around by now, unless part of your thing is that you like midnight graffiti sessions. Which would be hot, by the way. But if not, you could come inside."
He was about to turn for the door when he stopped and added over his shoulder, "There's no weapons or freaky sex dungeon in there, promise."
Kyle actually chuckled lightly at that, though there was still tension in his frame as he stepped up to the threshold, shooting Leandro a look. "You think midnight graffiti sessions are hot?" he asked, the hint of a smile playing over his lips as he took a decision. Hell, if he was going to do this, he may as well throw himself into the mix entirely. He doubted the tack he’d taken with Adam would work on Leandro, after all. He paused for a moment, then continued, "Why do I get the feeling that, for you, it would be less about the art and more about the thrill? Wondering if you're going to be caught? Wondering whether, if you are, you'd be able to disappear into the night. Have it swallow you whole. Hide you from the footsteps chasing after you, all so you could do it again. Another time." He had stopped just by Leandro as he spoke, his voice low and filled with a certain longing that suggested he knew exactly what he was talking about, for all that he looked like he'd never broken a rule in his life.
Leandro leaned down and, instead of pulling his key from his pocket where it might have been expected, slid it out from the side of his boot. It was too easy for someone to dip into his pockets looking for something, so he never put anything important in them. Door 2 clicked open, but when it went something on the other side clattered immediately and noisily.
"Door bell," Leandro explained briefly. He was sure everyone who was allowed into his room by choice would ask the same question about the line of empty cans hanging from the inside of the door to whack together like that. The curtains were also taped tightly shut, so that there was no gap between the glass and the fabric for anyone to peer through. Other than that, it was normal and sparse, likely as everyone else's was. Except that the bed was not made and the bathroom door was closed, and perhaps the coffee table had been kicked crooked by many occasions of a boot resting on top of it.
Once Kyle was inside, Leandro closed the door behind him with an arm reaching over his shoulder. He grinned, electricity twinging at the ends of his nerves with this new admission. "So you do have a little something in you, do you, baby blue?" he purred, and if Kyle watched closely he might have noted the slightest flick of his tongue against his canine tooth. He approved. "That is really hot. Downright foxy. I like the way you think. But no, it's art and thrill. I wouldn't want to just leave any old thing on the wall, or else where's the excitement? I want the next person to walk by to wonder why it's there and what it means. Whether the fingerprints streaking through the paint in places were the result of frustration, or glee, or maybe the graffiti artists getting caught in the moment and having at it against the rough brick wall."
Here he cocked his head almost casually, taking a breath's distance of a step away from Kyle. "See, everything's more fun with friends. You can have a seat if you want." He was back to his old enigmatic mood again, just motioning towards the couch.
Kyle found himself a little lost in the description, his expression softening, his lips curling unconsciously upwards, head tilting lightly to one side. He often got carried off during times that other people talked about art with any air of experience. "Well, if you like that sort of thing, maybe we could brighten up this place a little more sometime together?" he suggested, before really processing the last meaning of Leandro's 'style' of art and how that effect was created. As that relation hit, his eyes widened a little and he took a step back, before turning and heading for the couch, not wanting to be standing right there as Leandro gave whatever his comeback was bound to be.
Oh, that was funny. As Kyle realized where the conversation was going, Leandro thought he looked like someone had suddenly pinched him. He couldn't help but wear a wicked little smile, though he didn't chase after Kyle to pursue it. The fact that he'd let his guard down like that was enough. Now he could sit on the couch and just let it sink in, Leandro thought, while his host made himself comfortable. He tugged his jacket off his shoulders, revealing the thin sleeveless A-shirt underneath tucked into grey-washed jeans by a rugged leather belt. Leandro slung his jacket over the desk chair and moved to join Kyle on the couch. Without sleeves on any longer, many of his tattoos were on display. They weren't the wild and immature images an observer might guess he'd like, but a mosaic of artful symbols down his arms. The one closest to Kyle was a practical garden of flowers, from lotus blossoms to bloody star flowers, to dainty tea roses crossing over his neck. Here and there amongst the flowers were smaller things, like an eye motif peering from the center of a lotus on the back of his hand. His left arm, partially obscured, seemed to be an image of the Virgin Mary amongst the roses. Clutching at the pit of his throat was a long-limbed spider on a thin web.
Heel clipping the wood with a slight clack, Leandro sat on the couch and put his feet up on the coffee table. He pillowed his head on one arm and glanced over at Kyle. "I think there are a few things in here you could brighten up. But, I was hoping you'd take some time to teach me the trade. I know someone who's interested in a tattoo."
The waiting was almost worse than if Leandro had immediately picked up on Kyle’s slip. The younger man sat on the couch, head down, hands on his knees, his position almost prim as he fell back into his previous stiffness, waiting for the verbal blow to come. Today of all days, he expected it. Everything else seemed to have hit him. He felt less prepared to deal with this encounter than ever before. Then again, Kyle had no idea how to prepare for Leandro.
And then the man was sitting beside him, all colour and design, catching Kyle’s eye even though he had been mostly looking at the floor, retreating back to last year’s tactic of being quiet and small and unnoticeable.
He hadn’t expected the flowers, somehow, and he looked despite himself, turning his head, and then shifting his body as his eyes roamed over the painted skin, taking in the details, tracking the designs. He was staring again, he knew. Only, this time, he didn’t care so much.
It was the sound of Leandro’s heels, followed by his words that pulled Kyle out of his stupor, and he looked up, blinking. “I…” Kyle shook himself mentally. “You want a design?” he asked. “Or… You want me to teach you to draw one?” He made an effort to sound more together. More like he would be with any other damn person here.
For a second there, Leandro thought Kyle really sort of looked bad-off. Like he wasn't just annoyed or stressed but actually scared. That too was something Leandro hadn't intended. He didn't want to give the kid a heart attack, per se, or make him feel like a victim of somebody terrible... just liven him up a little. He opened his mouth as if to say something, but closed it again when he noticed Kyle's taken attention. His eyes running up the length of his arm, his expression ringing true to Leandro as sort of similar as to when they were talking about graffiti. Leandro began to let a genuine smile creep onto his face, some pastel-soft mix of pride and satisfaction.
"This is actually the work of three different people," he explained in a low voice. He stretched his arm out so that it was directly in front of Kyle, letting the inside of his wrist face him and then turning it so that his elbow pointed up instead for a full view. "You can kind of tell where one stopped and one started back up and how they all built off of each other's work. But see how this rose is a different weight than this star flower? I always sort of liked that. The chick who did the roses had a very delicate hand, but then the star flowers are big and dark. You can touch if you want."
The smile gave way to a slight smirk at that suggestion, curious to see if Kyle would actually do it. But to answer his question, he added briefly, "Nah, we already know what we need to do. So I guess he needs a design that fits on his skin. But I do want to learn to draw."
Kyle had been listening as Leandro spoke, taking in the aspects of the designs. He could see it now – the change, where the work had been done by different people. The variation in style and feel of it all. It all actually worked together, yet there were differences in personality between the sections. He had never really considered anything like this before. He had seen tattoos previously, naturally. But never like this. Nothing this extensive up close.
He realised that it was soothing, in a way. The stresses of the day - hell, even the stress he had come to associate with dealing with Leandro, that unknown quantity that had him so at sea - it all faded and felt far less important as his attention was drawn to something he was finding he knew and could deal with. It may have been in a medium he was fairly unfamiliar with, but it was art nonetheless. Kyle could connect to that. Enough that the younger man hardly even hesitated in going with Leandro’s suggestion and reaching out to trace down one particular part of the design, lightly at first and then firmly taking hold of his wrist and starting to turn Leandro’s arm so that he could check out different parts of the design.
“I love the colours here,” he said, speaking with an authority which had been clearly missing before, pointing to one specific area. “The way they work together.” He belatedly looked up at Leandro. “Though – I didn’t see you as a guy who likes flowers,” he commented, twitching a relaxed smile. In that moment, he found he felt more on a level ground than usual. It was like during the journal conversations - whilst they were talking about art, he felt like he had regained some control. God, but he needed to feel like that right now.
So they had returned to Kyle's turf, it seemed, and he was taking charge a little. Leandro laughed openly as his arm was grabbed and turned, making an exaggerated "o" face after a minute as if he was being made into taffy instead of just turned. "Careful, you'll break something!" he chided, but relaxed so that he could lean into a better position to be looked at. His own face fell into a more contemplative pose, except that while Kyle was looking at his tattoos, he was watching Kyle's face. He was a cute kid, he thought, sweet-faced as anything, but he was beginning to wonder where he'd come from. The composure spoke of that sad ailment known as "good breeding", but he had an interesting curiosity to him. Some kind of zest for something more than that, maybe? After all, if he was into working with metal, spraying graffiti, and hanging out in the private room of a guy who'd made numerous sexual innuendos at him... Curious.
That smile was encouraging, though. Leandro smiled back at him, very brief but with some glimmer of being genuine. "Thanks. Yeah. I mean, I don't think people think about it that much but there's a whole secret language written up about flowers. You can say all kinds of things with them. Like this here--" He turned his hand back around to face knuckles up, showing off the lotus with the bright blue eye. "The lotus represents spirituality. In Egypt it used to be a big deal that lotuses would dunk under the water at night to stay safe and then bloom again when the sun came out. They thought the flowers were being reincarnated every morning. So, it's sort of like a symbol for the soul. And then the eye in the middle of it, it could be like a third eye, the thing that gives you intuition and lets you see the truth, but it's also another symbol in the east called a nazar. It's a protective spirit and it chases away evil. So this whole thing means "protection of the purity of the soul from evil". I kind of made it up even if I didn't draw it."
As he was explaining, Leandro's expression turned to one of seriousness, even studiousness. For all of his jokes and his slightly meandering language, he felt confident in what he was talking about.
Kye listened, clearly interested in what Leandro had to say for the sake of the fact it was interesting, yet also intrigued because, for once, the other man wasn’t making jokes and comments. The look on his face seemed genuine, and the things he was talking about were well thought out and put together. This was clearly something that he had looked into, something which interested him. That was fascinating, because it was so unlike what Kyle had come to expect from Leandro. “I like that,” he told him. “I’d heard that there was some kind of language to flowers, but I never much paid attention to that side of things. It would have been too... obvious,” he said with a little chuckle, rolling his eyes at himself, relaxed enough in this moment to do that. He had always been aware that with his lithe build and delicate features, the phrase ‘effeminate’ was never far from people’s minds, and whilst he generally didn't let people's opinions of him away his actions, still he had taken some very conscious steps away from that when choosing his paths in life. Going and studying flowers would have been something he ran from as fast as he could, had it been presented to him. That didn’t mean that listening to someone else talk about it wasn’t interesting though. Especially when they weren't just regurgitating what they had been told, but rather had considered it themselves and come to an original conclusion. He could respect that.
"Too obvious?" Leandro echoed. He blinked a few times at Kyle, clearly skeptical... and then let out with a loud "pffff!!" and a dismissive laugh. "Really? Aw, come on. Look at me. Does it look like I give a flying fuck?"
Here he held out his hands illustratively, as if to put himself on showcase. "That kind of business, holding yourself back from stuff you like is way too boring. Who cares what other people think? Are they going to take up the task of making you happy for the rest of your life if you don't do it yourself? Naw, man... nobody does that for anybody." That last bit was laced with a tinge of bitterness, Leandro's lower lip puffing out slightly. He brought his eyes over to the wall briefly, stewing over the thought.
"I mean, I guess... I guess if it was dangerous for you to be yourself, that pretty much sucks. I'm probably not one to talk anyway. I'm not really legit "gay", I'm just gay enough to be suspicious. I'm just a bi-stander." He snorted through his nose on the last one, glancing over at Kyle to see if he got the pun. "But seriously, man. You look like you're from a nice place. Was it really that scary?"
Kyle fixed him a slightly amused look. “I didn’t mean it like that,” he said, at Leandro’s reaction, and also at the pun he’d made. “I came out years ago now, and I don't make a secret of my sexuality. I got pretty lucky on the acceptance front. And it's not like I’ve been hiding some burning desire to be all floral or some bullshit like that. It's that I’ve never been the type to do something just to please other people. I just don’t… I like to challenge people’s expectations of me. I don’t want to conform to what they expect me to be. And sure, in the past, not wanting to be something I think people expect might have just coloured my choices in things. It’s got nothing to do with fear, or wanting other people to make me happy. It’s because I want to be who I want to be. Not who everyone assumes I should be.
“What I meant by ‘obvious’ is that I’m perfectly aware what I look like. Hell, I pretty much got told I look like a girl not five hours ago. And when I was growing up, people figured I was delicate and breakable and all the shit that goes with that.” Kyle shrugged. “They were wrong and I made sure that I showed them that.” In his head, he amended that they were mostly wrong. He had moments where he felt very breakable, but those were moments that were rarely seen by others, and he had no intention of sharing with the man before him. This might have felt like an honest conversation, but Kyle remained wary and somewhat uncertain of the other man.
“It was nothing to do with danger. It wasn’t scary.” Kyle laughed at that, thinking of the home he grew up in, with it’s stunning views out over New York, the private school he had attended. Hell, even the loft apartment his parents had leased for him during his freshman year had been far more than most would have expected. “I guess that I’ve always thought that I don’t care what people think of me. And, in a way, that’s right. Kind of. I care what they think of me when they’re trying to push me into some stereotype or other. Someone tries to do that and I just want to prove them wrong. But I’m not going to make myself miserable to do it.” It was a statement made with confidence, holding Leandro’s eyes as he spoke, entirely ignoring the fact that he’d had a near breakdown in Adam’s room over the fact he felt like he wasn’t coping. As far as Kyle was concerned, that was another matter entirely. That wasn’t to do with who he was, that was all about the situation he found himself in now.
Leandro leaned back comfortably again as he listened to Kyle's explanation. His elbow steadied on the armrest and he propped his cheek up on his chin, squishing it in a slight, unintentional way. His black fringe fell over his brow in such a way that the movement highlighted his stillness, a depth to his unmoving dark eyes. He was really giving Kyle and his overall presence some thought; not once did he interrupt until he was finished.
"I see," he said at first, just sitting up again and flicking his hair out of his face. Leandro started to fumble with his stash of cigarettes. "I get you. It sucks when people have this worldview they want to impose on you. Like if you mess up the way their ideas fit together their brains will explode and they'd be so embarrassed to have to be scraped off the ceiling or something. People do that to me too, you know? They expect me to be this boogeyman, and like sometimes when I was at home in Los Angeles ladies with kids would cross the street rather than have to walk their kids past me. But I'd never hurt a kid, man. That's just ridiculous."
He shook his head vaguely, something sour passing over his lips, but he drowned it out by sticking a cigarette in between them. "Do you smoke? Mind if I do?" he asked. Kyle hadn't protested before, when he was smoking for a second outside, so he thought he probably wouldn't be disturbed now. It was his room, after all. But still, just to show what an expectation-defying gentleman he could be, he waited for Kyle to say something either way and offered him the cigarettes.
After a moment of shifting the cigarette around in between his generous lips, Leandro spoke in a thoughtful murmur again. "I don't get the thing about looks. Obviously, I've seen worse. Who the hell told you you look like a girl? Were they blind? I mean sure, you're nice-looking, but I don't have any doubts about you. I can understand not wanting to be treated like a victim, though. You got it right. Don't fall for it." He broke into a more characteristic smile, eyes narrowing at the corners. "Hmh. Cool. You're not bad. I'd hit that." Well, nothing was going to last forever. Since looks were being emphasized, Leandro made a point of using that feline gaze to unabashedly check Kyle out. Maybe he was joking. Maybe he wasn't.
“I don’t mind if you smoke,” Kyle said, considering everything that Leandro had said and mentally ordering the way he was going to reply. The other man had hit on a number of points and Kyle didn’t want to let any of them go. Hell, given the way Leandro usually was - and the way he appeared to be drifting back towards being - Kyle had no idea when he would have another opportunity for a civil type of conversation and he wasn’t willing to let the opportunity pass.
“So, people judge us both on looks. Not surprising, really. And neither of us are actually how we first appear. Do - do you mind if I ask you a question? Which might come out really wrong, so please try not to take offence or anything, because that’s not how I mean it,” Kyle said, giving an apologetic-type look, just in case. “If it bugs you, how people judge you because of the way you look. Why... I mean - the way you look is kind of your choice? So... Or is it just that you like how you look and screw everyone else if they can’t deal?” he asked, almost working through the options himself as he asked the question. Leandro’s look was hardly subtle, after all.
He left the question hanging and moved on before Leandro had a chance to answer. “It was Jun-he. This asian guy here? We were talking this afternoon and he basically told me that with the way I look, it made him want to treat me like a woman. Which, as you pointed out, I clearly am not.” Which succinctly brought Kyle onto the final question he wanted to ask, and he shifted a little, turning more towards Leandro and sitting up a little straighter, leaning back slightly to fix him with a determined look. “Why do you do that?” he asked. “That whole ‘I’d hit that’ thing. You jumped on it straight away, and normally - I don’t... I’ve had guys flirting with me before. And I’ve dealt with the come on and all. But, usually, it’s guys giving me the come on because, well, for me. With you - I... It doesn’t feel personal. I don’t know if you started the whole thing because you knew I was gay. Or if, when you started, you had no clue, but you wanted to see how I’d react, or whatever. But... You come out with this stuff and it doesn’t feel like... It feels like a challenge. Not a proper come on. So - what is it?” Because he wanted to know, and if he didn’t ask now, he felt like he’d end up going crazy with confusion sooner or later. So, he was asking and he was hoping to hell he was actually going to get an answer.
Leandro noted that Kyle wasn't going to give him space to answer his questions right away, and in his typical fashion didn't let it bother him. He smiled briefly with the permission to light his cigarette, flopping the pack onto the much-abused coffee table in case Kyle changed his mind about having one. While Kyle continued to talk, Leandro went about his leisurely business of striking a match, one long stroke bringing light to the end that he held to his cigarette for a second. There was nearly a mildness in his posture as he watched the match burn down a little, trapped between his fingers and licking the air. Some subtle affection for its beauty.
When he did look up, when Kyle was finished and greeting him with the return of that stiffness - the upright posture, the straightforward stare - Leandro reflected at him a continuing languor. He met his eye to show that he had been listening, but sucked in a puff of smoke and curled his lips to release a yawning "o" with it. "You said it yourself, you know," he started. "You'd fight for your own identity. What you really like and who you are. So would I. But consider this... maybe my looks aren't so much a perversion of me as they are an extension. They're symbols, like I said, and they all mean something else about me that I couldn't change any sooner than you could randomly stop being gay. And anyway, in case you didn't notice, I didn't exactly start with lots of advantages. So hiding is pointless. I got shit before I even started out." He stopped there briefly to take a breath, a little rasp inherent in the back of his throat, and twirl the ash off his cigarette. "So, yes. It's affirming. I wear my heart and my mind on my sleeves and I don't feel like being ashamed of them."
On the topic of Jun-he, the elder man just smiled enigmatically. "Hah, that guy. Don't let him get to you. I talked to him on the journals earlier. His English isn't great so I think half the time he doesn't catch the full drift of what he's saying. I mean, I've been there and all, but it was still a little funny when he totally didn't catch a joke. I'm sure he'll figure it out sooner or later. So, maybe he didn't mean that. And if he did, if he really wants to make you his lady, then someone needs to teach him some better pick-up lines." Leandro snorted then, smoke blown from his nose with it not unlike some sort of dragon.
And finally they were at the topic of the hour. With someone like Kyle, he was surprised it took him that long to ask. At first Leandro rose one brow, then he laughed quietly. "You worry way too much. Is that what you've had on your mind? "Why'd he do that?! What's it mean?!" Man, I thought you artist types liked to go with the flow. But seriously. Sometimes a compliment's a compliment, man. I talked to you on the journals and I liked your style, other than that way you have of analyzing the shit out of what you said after you already said it, and I wanted to play with you. I try not to overthink this shit. If I see someone and I think he's beautiful I want to say so. If I don't think the same in ten minutes, or if he doesn't like me, then no big thing. Life changes whether you want it to or not. But point being at that particular moment I felt it and owned it. So let it go, baby. Have some fun with your feelings. Tap into that artist "passion" shit. I told you already. I don't like to live halfway."
He reached the end of what he wanted to say and gave Kyle an indulgent look, cigarette hanging loosely from his upheld fingers while he waited for a response.
“Maybe I didn’t notice about the advantages - or lack of them,” Kyle offered. “I don’t actually know that much about you. Or the shit you’ve gotten in the past. But I get not being ashamed of who you are. Even if some people don’t like that so much. I just - I wanted to ask. I wanted to understand.” Because he knew there was a whole lot that he couldn’t just ‘know’, or figure out himself. But he wasn’t sure Leandro was quite right. He wasn’t sure the other man really wore his mind on his sleeve. From what Kyle could see, Leandro had far more mind than he first appeared to. He just didn’t know how to put that across, and so he kept the observation to himself for now.
Kyle thought of the way that Jun-he had held his hand earlier. He wasn’t certain that the guy had been interested, maybe he had been, though with the flirtation that he had deflected from Adam, and with dealing with Leandro right now, Kyle wasn’t sure that he was certain of anything right now. So, he let the subject drop - he wasn’t going to be spreading Jun-he’s secrets in any event. “I don’t know how to take you,” Kyle admitted after a moment or two. “The things you say, I don’t know whether you mean them or not. And, what - you’re saying that you mean them in the moment, but maybe not a couple of minutes later?” He considered this, trying to work it into his view of things. He had to change his view of things if he was going to make it. “So, what you’re saying is that I should just, what? Take whatever you say without reading anything into it? Not take you seriously at all? React and not expect anything to come of it?” He could actually do that, he figured. If he knew that’s all this was. That it was some game, a matching of wits that was leading nowhere. It would take some of the pressure off. He could have fun with that as long as he didn’t have to be worried about feelings in the meantime.
For the first time during the conversation, Leandro looked askance at some invisible object on the opposite wall and looked sort of bored. His mouth thinned out, one long arm reaching over to stub out his finished cigarette in the tray and leave it there crooked and mushed. After that, he made a movement that was something like a shrug if he had not been leaning on his shoulder. "Thanks. That's thoughtful of you to ask. But seriously, come on. How to take me? You take me with a spoonful of sugar, or for external use only, or with a glass of water and then call me in the morning. Really? You don't "take" people. That suggests that you'd do something different depending on what you thought I wanted to see and I don't like that. If you do something, or if you change your mind, you should do it because that's what you actually think. Like, see here's what I meant. If I like you, and I do something that I think would be fun with you, and you react like a brick, then I probably won't like you as much after as I did before. Or, if you throw a fit about what I did, then what am I going to do? I'm not going to regret it, because I know I did it genuinely, and if I didn't then I fucked up and I should deal with it. So it's on you then, you just don't mesh with me, and we go on our way. Whatever."
He'd even allowed his tone to grow a little icy, but that was beginning to sit poorly with him. Leandro sat himself up on the couch a little more, his heels dropping to the floor, and tried shooting Kyle a lopsided grin. "Jeez, man. All I'm saying is "relax". It means what it means. I didn't know I had to sign a pre-nup to flatter someone. All I was trying to do was show a good time to a pretty girl last night. I just wanted you to have a good time too, have a drink, maybe sing an out-of-key song with us or give me a drunk kiss over the bar. That would have been fun. Then we get up in the morning, complain about our headaches, and see what the new day brings us. Don't get caught up in whether or not you should take me seriously and don't insult me by trying to strategize your time with me."
“See - that’s the problem,” Kyle pointed out, gesturing. “We can’t ‘go our own way’, can we? We’re stuck here, in this place. Two floors, twenty nine rooms. For, how long? For years. That’s a whole lot of awkward if you read a situation wrong. Hell, we’ve been here four days and people are already getting into relationships and screwing them up.” He held up his hands. “Not that I’m insinuating anything. Because no, you don’t need a pre-nup to flatter someone. I wasn’t asking for one. I just wanted to be on the same page as you. You confuse me, and I don’t relax well when I’m confused. It’s kinda distracting,” he explained, admitting to that much. He offered Leandro a quirked smile and hope it would soothe some of the iciness that had appeared for a second, and disappeared so quickly, it left Kyle wondering if it hadn’t just been purposely covered up.
“As for last night... I was having a good time. I just don’t drink much and that has nothing to do with you at all. The fact I wasn’t up for drinking wasn’t a reflection on you, or the company. I...” He took a breath and decided to go for honesty. “It doesn’t take much, to get me drunk. And I don’t... We’ve been here for four days and I don’t know everyone, and I sure as hell don’t trust them. Maybe I’ll let you get me drunk when I feel a little more... comfortable with our surroundings. In the meantime, don’t take it so personally. I’m being cautious, here. The last year.... Wasn’t the best for me.” He snorted a quiet laugh, though there wasn’t much humour in it. “Doubt I’m the only one. But, what I’m saying is that - oh hell, I have no idea what I’m saying. And now you’re probably gonna tell me not to think so much.”
What did earn a more mellowed laugh was the idea of other people already getting into relationships and screwing them up. Leandro was quiet until then, just peering over at Kyle sideways. Then he huffed that laugh, dropping his chin and shaking his head as if in some form of observer's disappointment. "Seriously? See, I can kind of see wanting to get laid right off, especially if it's been a while, and now we have this happy little co-ed oasis going on... but, what? You mean legitimate relationships? People actually wanting to date already? Or is it just guilt from people who don't normally have one night stands?" Here he rose an eyebrow curiously.
He only managed to deflect for that long, however. Kyle was still asking after answers, and Leandro found himself with very few. It really wasn't as deep as Kyle wanted to make it. In the end, Leandro just shook his head one last time and leaned against the back of the couch to see if he could dress up his answer in some way that would satisfy him. "Look... I'll put it this way. Who do you really think is going to do nasty things to you? The guy who makes himself a very open spectacle while you're out in what counts for public around here and you're not alone? Or someone who creeps up on you when you don't expect it? Honestly. If I was really a danger to you, would I have said gross sexual things to you in front of my friend and your friend in an open place? If something happened to you, I'd probably be the first person they'd ask." His eyes crept over to Kyle to stare at him in an obvious manner. "Anyway, you really are worried what other people think. How do you expect to always get along with everyone? It's not going to happen. Out of twenty-nine people, the way I see it is you're bound to hate someone sooner or later."
Despite all of that, Leandro did understand caution. Just because he repelled what he could with a rough attitude didn't mean everyone else had it in them to do the same. He did soften out then, rubbing a finger against his lower lip for a moment. "Alright... alright, fine. I'll cut you some slack." His eyes flicked up towards Kyle's face. "Go ahead, then. Ask me some stuff. What do you want to know to make you comfortable? Since you're so worried if we're going to be friends." That might have sounded a little sharp, if not for the wink accompanying it.
Kyle chuckled. “You don’t need to cut me slack. Not in that way. I just wanted to clear up where we stood - which, we’ve done. And I wanted to clear up that me not getting wasted wasn’t a reflection on you.” He leaned back and pulled a hand through his hair, stopping as he found yet another flake of dried paint from earlier on. “I don’t think you’re going to do nasty things to me - if I thought that, I wouldn’t be here right now. I’m not scared of you, Leandro.” Which, he had to admit to himself, could be him being naive. He was positive there would be people here who he should, by all rights, be scared of.
"Fine. One time offer. Now you're going to have to work for it just like anyone else." Leandro said with a growing grin. "I'll make sure to put any future intentions towards you in writing. You should do that too, and submit them to my lawyer. He's in room 19. I'll go over them and let you know what I think." He was tired of speaking seriously now, apparently. Not that his mind couldn't be swayed to focus on something else, but the rational negotiating of a new friendship wasn't his style at all. He wanted some reaction, some excitement to remember the guy by. There was no excuse for it now, since there was no one else in the room for Kyle to be cautious about.
And naturally, that last statement helped. It earned a big smirk from the other man, who leaned forward a little in interest. "Oh you're not, are you? That's just because you don't know yet that I bite." He lifted the corner of his lip to reveal one sharp canine and snapped his teeth together lightly.
Kyle quirked a smile back. “You do that. In writing. Every time,” he said, agreeing, but with a humorous lilt to it. He’d said what he wanted, and there was a limit to his seriousness as well. “And no - I’m not scared of you one bit. Even if you do bite.” And sure, just maybe he was now out to prove something as he pulled the corner of his bottom lip between his teeth and looked up through his lashes at the other man.
Now that look. That was enough to make anyone feel like the Big Bad Wolf, not just a little keen. On some level, Kyle really must have known what he was doing. He was practically inviting it. Leandro had to lean over a little further, his own eyes falling into a heavily-lidded state. He sucked a cool breath in between his teeth, one that Kyle could feel on his cheek as the other man came nearer. He slipped past the point where it would have been comfortable to kiss him, past his cheek, towards his ear, towards his neck. His earrings glittered off his ear close in Kyle's view as he moved so slowly, one arm ghosting around the back of the couch behind his companion.
He stopped abruptly at a point and could be heard snickering as he hovered just near his ear. "Gnarly dandruff, dude. It's even blue."
Kyle had been inviting it. It had been a challenge of his own, to see what the other man would do. And to prove that just because he’d called explanation, that didn’t mean that he was going to be all straight laced and serious about everything. He didn’t flinch as Leandro moved nearer, waiting to see what he would do. And, when the laugh came, he felt himself joining in, pushing the other man away lightly. “Dangers of being an artist. Paint gets everywhere.”
Leandro's slender frame was fairly easy to push back. He moved back a foot or so, into close but comfortable space, grinning like an imp. "Everywhere?" he echoed, glancing down over Kyle. "That sounds like a good time, actually. I think you do need to help me paint something. I'm not a good artist, though, so don't blame me if it gets messier than you think." Just for show, he wiggled one eyebrow up and down playfully.
Of course. Kyle figured that the guy would be as messy as possible - or, at least, try it out, just to see. “I thought you wanted to learn to draw first. Wasn’t that where we started out. Baby steps, Leandro. Baby steps,” he said, his eyes sparkling with suppressed laughter. He was happier with this entire situation now, and it showed in his entire demeanour. He was a whole lot more relaxed now, and clearly more playful.
Something still didn't totally sit right with the change in character, but maybe as Kyle grew in confidence it would pass. Leandro tried not to think about it, his turn to be thrown off by the other's behavior. Then again, it could also have been that he himself had not been close to someone in quite some time. Maybe he didn't really remember how this ought to go after all. He wouldn't exactly have called himself Mr. Popular in times past.
"Heh, yeah. Baby steps," he echoed, feeling as though the statement applied multiple meanings to their new friendship. "Not really my style, but you're the expert here. Where do we start?"
Kyle sat up, brushing himself down. “Well, for starters, I need sleep. But how about you meet me in the activity room tomorrow and we can go over some things,” he suggested. “You can show me what you can do and I can work out where to go from there.” As he said that, he figured that Leandro could make all sorts of commentary on the phrasing , but he felt better able to handle it now.
For now, Leandro was out of commentary. He nodded lightly, raising one arm to stretch his back in a deep curve. "Heck yeah. That sounds better the more I think about it. It's been one of those days, hasn't it been?"
Finished with his stretch, he stood up as if to give agreement for Kyle to do so as well. "I'll find you tomorrow. Might be later on. I don't know what else I'll be doing tomorrow, but I guess I should ask Dominic if he managed to get the needles."
Dominic. Why the hell did everything have to always come back to Dominic? This guy that, eventually, he was going to have to properly meet. Then, suddenly, he remembered something. Fanboy. Kyle twitched a smile, but said nothing. “Sure - just drop me a line, or come find me. I’m sure I won’t have anything all that pressing to do,” he said, standing and taking a step towards the door. Fanboy.
"Will do," Leandro said. He didn't suspect anything from Kyle, so he just smiled back simply. "Take it easy, man. There ain't anything pressing to do in the Hotel California." The name had expanded after a while from pertaining just to the bar to the place as a whole, a description of the mystery and menace of the place in equal measures. "Stay safe out there."
Kyle raised an eyebrow. “I’m sure I’ll be fine,” he said, drolly. “See you tomorrow,” he added, before heading out.