Re: Marvel hospital: Gwen & Peter
"I'll assume it's a lot, and that you're only admitting to a little," she countered, and she maybe stared a little bit when his expression softened, and that was stupid - so stupid, Stacy. Get it together! "He would," she agreed of Flash risking himself for any of them, and there wasn't even a moment of hesitation before she agreed with him. Flash was selfless. She knew he'd been trying to keep her safe when he'd gotten hurt, and that was something she'd need to shoulder. There wasn't any logical benefit to be found from Peter being guilty too, but she knew that was a lost argument, and she sighed and gave him a soft look. "You always take on too much, Peter."
But the softness was quickly replaced by that heat that was making her cheeks redder and redder. Her frigidity wasn't really something she'd planned on discussing with her ex-boyfriend after facing horrible things and not sleeping for over a day, but nothing was predictable in her life, and she'd accepted that in the way a scientist accepted chaos theory; it was just how it was. She screwed the heels of her palms against her eyes, as if that would somehow make the conversation easier. Nope, but good try! "Peter, everyone else can just sleep with whoever. I can't do that. I messed around with a bunch of guys to make Harry like me, so he could think I was a party girl, and I had to get drunk to do it. I slept with Harry twice, and I wasn't sober either time. That's my entire sexual history, other than us messing around." More blushing (so much blushing!). "I'm not fun that way."
She expected him to argue with her about spontaneity, but he didn't, and then he said he hadn't been lying. She shook her head, interrupting, "I know you weren't lying, Peter. You don't lie, and I know you weren't saying what you thought I wanted to hear. You believed it," she said, and her tone indicated that made it harder somehow. "You didn't think anything would happen, because you didn't think you were interested in her like that, not until it happened." Which meant he was interested in Mary Jane like that, right? "This was probably just the start of something," she told him, and though her tone was reluctant, she still said the words; she cared about him too much to play games with him, and she couldn't try to guilt him into not following his heart, even if it led him to the redhead. "I know you have feelings for me, but if I asked if you have feelings for her, I bet you would have trouble answering. I don't think you could say no," she said, and she tried hard (and failed) to keep the sadness out of her voice this time. "I don't want be to the girl you're with because you lost me years ago, and I don't want to be the girl you're with when you realize you really want to be with someone else. I've been that girl already-" She almost left it at that, but if he was being honest she could be too, even if she was brushing tears away without bothering to hide it at this point. "It's harder with you. You're you. All the others were wrong somehow. Not bad, just different. You're not, and it's harder, which isn't logical. I know it's not logical."
And, okay, so maybe she scooted closer when he did. Which was stupid given everything she'd just said. Stupid, Stacy! But even with the Mary Jane thing, there were few people she trusted more, and sitting still for this long meant a lot of thinking about how terrible things had really been the past few days. She'd kept that at bay by moving, but she wasn't moving now. His emphasis was pronounced, and she covered his hand with hers unthinkingly. "Hey. Keeping me alive isn't your job. It's not your responsibility. You know that, right?" She sniffled. "And I don't want to be someone that just makes things harder for you with Mary Jane. I don't want to do that either, okay?" She squeezed his fingers. "I love you, and I want you to be happy. Just like always."