Re: Quicklog: Bucky B/Sharon C
[Bucky was temperamental, that at least didn't change much from the past to now. He was a shit as a teenager, and now he just had a lot of anger on top of it. Strangely it was one of the few flaws he didn't mind so much, because it was as far as possible from the Soldier. He was a machine, made of ice and brutality. Bucky was all kinds of complicated and flawed and that was a lot better than the alternative, in his opinion. If he wanted to talk to someone who would just nod and agree with him or not talk back, he wouldn't be across the table from Carter.]
It's not as hard with Steve. We've got really clear lines of where we differ from the other version. He's a great guy, we get along, he's easy to care about. Mostly I just worry about not helping him enough. I mean I'm Bucky, you know? [And Bucky always helped Cap. It was an identity he had for years, it made up most of his mindset before. It was that Cap used in order to bring him back from the brink, the reminder of how important they were to each other.] I might not have been there when ours needed me, I let him down, but I'm here now, so I've got to be useful. [He owed it to Steve. This Steve, that Steve, any Steve. The list of things Bucky owed him was a mile long. It gave him something to do at least.]
There's no fixing what's broken, Carter. And this head of mine is broken. [He knocked his fist against his head a little to emphasize the point. Their food arrived, giving him some breathing space, and he was glad to have something to focus on for a minute. The amount of maple syrup he used was obscene. Whatever, he could eat what he wanted. Super Soldier and everything.] Don't mind chapter 910 of Bucky Barnes' existential crisis.