Who: Eddie and Steph (part 1) Where: Gotham When: last sunday What: Eddie's godkid gets baptized and it leads to both cute and sads. Warning: swearing
The afternoon was warm, bright, and despite the overlying Gotham smog, most people swore they could smell the buds beginning to burst out of the ground and trees grow their leaves back. Gothamites used it as the chance to explore their still and perpetually always recovering city, to soak in the sun and wake their bones in the spring sunlight. Little Isabella Gesati was just a little over four months old, and today marked the day she would join the Church. In the heart of one of Gotham’s working class neighborhoods, St. Agnes Church stood to hold the ceremony. People from all walks of life in warm and bright pastels filed in to watch the young Gesati baby be baptized with the church’s favorite riddled man standing at the baptismal pool with the parents.
Stephanie, who sat on the side in one of the tinier pews to the side, sat in a fascinated sort of awe at the ceremony of it all. The blonde former bat rarely stepped inside of a church if not to save it from Bane lackeys or on the insistence of Eddie, and had never attended any sort of baptism before. Arthur and Crystal could never be claimed as religious, even after Stephanie’s mother cleaned up and went straight, and their daughter never had time for something like religion in her life when she could barely keep herself together, when there were so many bad and good things happening. Sure, some days, she believed in a higher being, but it was hard to assign herself to anything like that when she’d seen so many people she loved die.
But, despite all of that, she lost herself in that ceremony, in little Isabella not wailing when the water splashed on her tiny forehead. The prayers, the solemn promises, the way Eddie looked on the alter as the priest asked him to vow to protect the little girl in his arms. Stephanie watched all of that in amazement and enamor, a rogue twinge in her chest here and there of jealousy for something she would never have now.
The ceremony concluded, and the reception was held in the party room of a (of course) nearby Italian restaurant owned by family members of the Gesatis. Tables were together in clusters across the room, white tablecloths adorning them. The spread was usual Italian fair, a party of carbs and cheese and meat and wine that everyone just had to indulge in or else Marie would cluck at them until they did. Cousins and neighborhood kids ran around to play some nonsensical game that adults forgot when they hit puberty. It was a typical baptism of a typical Italian Catholic family, even with attendants like goons from back in the day, a reformed supervillain, and a former bat.
Stephanie, dressed in purple of course and dark tights, boots, and a cardigan to hide the tattoos on her body as a sign of respect, was a little uncomfortable at first, wary of normal people in the way vets could be after being stationed for years at war. They had obviously all noticed the age jump in both she and Eddie, but she selfishly left that to Eddie to explain. So, she hovered to the sidelines at first while Eddie dealt with godfatherly duties, exchanging words here and there with Frank or Marie as they did their rounds. Frankie, Jr., bless his heart, sensed something was off, aside from the obvious, with his favorite fake older girlfriend, and tugged her to the side to ask her.
And, god, Steph could never resist his big blue eyes and the way he hung on every one of her words. She visibly relaxed, choosing instead to ask Frankie how school was, if he found a girlfriend to replace her yet, whether or not he was being a dutiful older brother. He rattled off stories of schoolyard fights, of junior hockey games, of how Ma and Dad let him hold Isabella all the time but only if he was careful. Steph’s heart lurched at how obviously he loved his little sister, and she told him how very, very proud she was of him. When he asked again why she was older, she just smiled and told him magic, and while he clearly didn’t take that for face value, when he asked her about the scar trailing down her neck, she blamed a dinosaur quickly and tried to distract him by showing him a tattoo she had gotten especially for him on Earth-3: a tiny dinosaur behind her ear. She told him he was very, very special to her, just like his sister and parents were, and she wanted to remember that forever. She didn’t mention that her forever could have been so much shorter.
Placated and more comfortable, she shooed Frankie off to play with the other kids with the promise of more stories later and a playdate whenever he wanted, and mingled a little better with guests. The bats that curved around her chest peaked out of the top of her dress and through the little eyelets, and the tips of slant of words could just be seen edging out. Her other tattoos were on display now though, and she didn’t seem too worried about offending someone. At some point, she discarded the cardigan, and to her genuine relief and surprise, no one bullied her about it. They just talked about nice things, like the spring coming up and Isabella’s adorable face, and oh look at the picture of my cats. you have animals too? let’s see then. It was jarring and bizarre and disarming to have such nice simplicity, and when Stephanie began to feel just slightly overwhelmed, she searched to see for an opening with her riddled man. The second one appeared, she swooped in, two glasses of white wine in her hand and a smile on her face and a kiss to his cheek.
“You can’t leave me alone too long. I’ve got a date with a very eligible bachelor now.”
It wouldn’t surprise anyone that Eddie was into the rituals of church, especially all the pomp and circumstance of the Catholics. For him, it felt like forever since he was able to do something as simple as go to mass, so a special occasion like this lit him up like a firework. Frank was basically family at this point and the Gestati’s were proof that something good could happen in Gotham and survive. The weariness, the tired way everyone from his past made him feel was slowly pulled away as little Isabella wiggled and cooed when Father Mike poured holy water over her head. She didn’t cry, which was a sure sign she was a true Gotham kid. It made Eddie proud and happy and he had to keep himself from sneaking looks over to Stephanie with little wiggles of his eyebrows between vows.
By the end of the ceremony, all the weight of Earth-3 unraveled into a corner of his mind and didn’t ask to be put together between the wine, the good food and the easy conversation. Somewhere along the way he lost track of Stephanie and let himself stand in a circle with other adults while they pretended the sky wasn’t falling every month. Eventually, though (as per usual), he started missing his blonde ex-bat and excused himself from conversation around the same time she managed to swoop back in.
“Oh, and what bachelor is that?” He asked, taking one of the glasses of wine and beamed at her. Eddie hadn’t looked this comfortable in years and years, which meant it likely wouldn’t last past the party. He didn’t notice it, Eddie rarely noticed his own mannerisms in the heat of the moment, but a subconscious part of him was clearly holding onto that feeling. “You better be careful. I can beat up a couple people now. Even without a cane.” He said proudly, took a healthy sip of wine and then pressed a kiss on her lips like he would run out of energy without a real kiss from her every hour or so.
Stephanie did notice all of Eddie’s mannerisms though. Even if she never graduated college, she had a PhD in Edward Nashton, after six years together, especially after spending five years together as the only lifelines they had in the world. She saw the pride on the altar when he held little Isabella, and she immediately sensed an ease and happiness she hadn’t probably seen since the last moments they had in this Gotham. Her stomach felt warm, and she couldn’t help the smile that played across her mouth as she looked at him. So, maybe there were still problems brewing underneath the surface for the both of them, but look at him. If he could slip back into Gotham finally, maybe everything would be okay.
She took a long sip of the wine along with him and hummed in pleasure. Steph could easily get used to all of this agian. Of normal things like wine, people, life. Earth-3 was starved for celebrations like this. Stephanie and Eddie were barely afforded one night to themselves for their anniversary every year, let alone something as frivolous (in that Gotham) as a baptism. It made her feel normal in the way these people always did, and while the prospect was incredibly daunting, she wanted nothing more than to have a life where she didn’t think about bombs going off or friends lost or mistakes made.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Steph smirked with a wiggle of her eyebrows, brim of the glass hovering over her lips. The fact Eddie could potentially beat people up earned a playful growl like she wanted to see him demonstrate that as if she’d never seen it before in her life. “You aren’t allowed to beat people up at a baptism, it’s against everything you just vowed.” Her hand slid up and down his arm in affection. “It’s that other Gesati kid. You know, the one you taught all your moves to? I couldn’t resist his charms and his blue eyes, and I had to say yes. You understand, right?” An innocent flutter of her eyes.
Eddie smiled and automatically looked around to see if Frankie Jr was around before noticing him off playing with the other kids. “Well, I don’t mind losing to my very own protege.” He shook his head as if it were some great loss that every master of charms had to endure once in their lifetimes. “I’m just proud he managed to snag someone like you. Someone involved in a long term relationship no doubt.” Eddie took another sip of wine and then tugged her hand to sit down at a vacant table with him. He turned his chair so they could look out at the party with their backs facing the table and then set his wine glass down.
“How many drinks have you had, Nigma?” Marie’s voice suddenly sounded to the side of him and he shot a look up at her, his hair popping out of its otherwise gelled perfection. Marie was one of those beautiful Italian ladies with square shoulders and legs that looked like they could kick harder than a mule. She was tough just like a woman from Gotham who was married to an ex-con should be and much, much smarter than Frank ever was. In her arms was little Isabella, wrapped in a patchwork pink blanket, dazeley staring up at the lights in wonder.
“This is my first one.” Eddie said with a straight face.
“So, two or three. Okay, you can hold Isabella.” Marie smiled brightly, but it was over at Stephanie with a sort of knowing look that would make any young girl in a committed relationship a little uncomfortable. Eddie didn’t notice, he was too busy making no thank you waves of his hands that stopped the second Marie gently placed Isabella in his arms. It was like something snapped in his brain and all he could do was give a goofy little grin down at her. Marie held a long look at Stephanie and then pointed at her and Eddie (while he was too busy looking at the baby) and then walked away.
“Hey, Izzy.” Eddie whispered as the baby slowly turned her attention to him and reached a tiny hand up to play with his curly q hair. “Alright, but go easy. Jeez, you’re heavy what are they feeding you, bricks?” He bowed his head down so she could grab his hair and yank it with a bubbling giggle.
Stephanie continued with the innocent look, even as he tugged at her hand. “He’s a natural charmer, actually. You just enhanced his innate skillset.” She pulled a chair next to him, tilting it to face out as well, though she leaned slightly more into him. A natural instinct, especially in a place where she still didn’t feel particularly comfortable. Her awkwardness had been assuaged, but there still lingered a tiny sense of displacement in her bones, like she was watching a television show about normal people living normal lives instead of participating in it herself. But, Eddie grounded her. Eddie always grounded her.
But, before she could tease him any further, or ask him about how the party was going for him, Marie appeared out of thin air with the baby in her arms and that look that made Stephanie’s eyes go wide like saucers and stomach plummeting down. How could she do that? Oh, Steph knew exactly what that practically hammy wink and nod was implying, and she couldn’t exactly tell her why that was a problem. So, she looked a little stunned instead, mouth parting just slightly and fought the urge to mouth something to other woman. She didn’t. She just shifted in her chair, and blushed a little, and finally looked at Eddie and Izzy when Marie pointed to them.
Her heart soared at the sight of the baby in her man’s arms, and she had to bite back a mingled sound of happiness and sadness. Tears did well in her eyes, but she bit them back, too. Instead, she just watched in a happy sort of stupor that had her stomach doing flip-flops while Izzy tugged at Eddie’s hair. “She must know you like that,” she said with affection brimming in her voice. Eddie looked so happy the second Marie put the baby in his arms, and it was a mix between a dagger in her heart and a warmth spreading through her body. If Eddie looked up at his ex-bat, he would see a bright smile curling up her mouth. She looked happy, too. Happy to see him happy, and just so enamored with the sight of him holding his goddaughter in his arms.
Apparently, pulling on the riddled man’s hair was so fun that it woke up Isabella enough that she started to fuss out of her blanket. “I don’t know why your mom gives me you, I always rile you up.” Eddie frowned and unwrapped the pink blanket for her, slung it over his shoulder and sat her on his lap with his hands holding her back so she didn’t fall over. Eddie wasn’t flustered by babies, partially because he had carried Isabella around since she was born. Partially because they took a lot of patience and thinking ahead to prevent any accidents the actual parents could blame on him. That kind of challenge was Eddie’s bag.
With Isabella on his lap, she looked up at Stephanie and clapped her chubby hands together and laughed as Eddie bounced her gently with his legs. He looked over to Stephanie apologetically. “I should start acting like I hate this so Marie doesn’t hand her off to me at all the upcoming Gesati parties.” He said dryly. His smile flipped curiously, eyebrow raising at that bright smile she had across her face and he tried not to think about it too hard.
“I’ve got one of her toys in my breast pocket.” Eddie told her like they were on a secret mission and Stephanie needed to give him a hand. “Jangle it in front of her, she’ll go nuts.”
Stephanie just watched, trying her best to not disturb the moment, and goddammit did she hate Marie right now for throwing them into this situation. Didn’t they just fight about all this on her birthday? About picket fences, and having what they want, and this brand of happiness? It made her stomach lurch uncomfortably, and her mouth screwed up for a second as he busied himself with the baby. It was like an ache in her heart, to see Eddie so happy with some sort of domestic bliss, and it was her fault they didn’t have anything like this.
But, the moment was gone quickly as he began to bounce the baby on his lap, and she smiled at him again, slinging an arm around the back of her chair to prop her head up as she watched. “But you do love it,” Stephanie retorted, pointed look and wry smile across her mouth telling him not to apologize, that she had put them in this mess by bringing all of those feelings up again when they were just trying to settle in. Not that having a beautiful baby around helped that. “You love it, and Marie knows you love it. And she knows you’re great at it, too.” She wasn’t piling it on, or she didn’t mean to. It was the truth that she saw, and she wanted to share it with him.
Blonde eyebrows raised high, and she looked at him with a smirk. “You just want an excuse for me to touch you, baby.” But, she obliged, fingers sliding across his chest with a wiggle before she dipped into his breast pocket and grabbed the plastic keys in his pocket. “Do you have a stash of these?” she asked, amused before turning to Izzy. Stephanie always did well with older kids, but she didn’t have much experience with babies. And well, babies were always a strange subject for her, especially now. Especially that she and Eddie were home, and there were the struggles of what they wanted from all this.
She pushed all of those aside though in favor of jingling the plastic keys in front of Isabella. The baby giggled in glee, wiggling her fingers for the keys. Steph relaxed again, clearly enjoying herself as well, and cooing at the baby as she moved the keys around some more.
“Hey, you haven’t gotten handsy with me in hours. I’m desperate.” Eddie whispered back like Isabella shouldn’t hear such conversations. He didn’t let himself think about how awkward it was to be bouncing a baby on his lap after a drawn out fight about how he didn’t want this. He didn’t even let himself think about how happy they were sitting at a party with Isabella giggling away. Eddie just focused on how nice everything felt. How he wasn’t looking over his shoulder every ten minutes at an Owlman that wasn’t there. He felt peace, the kind priests wish on the troubled and decided it was better to let the puzzles and riddles rumble around in his head later. Not now.
“I do when I come visit.” Eddie made little boop boop booop noises at Isabella as she swatted at the keys and tried to eat them. “She doesn’t have any toys like this one. So, she only gets to play with them when I’m around.” He seemed faintly proud of his cleverness. “I don’t care if she’s using me for the giant plastic keys.”
Isabella pulled on the loop connecting the keys and then once she had them in her hands, started nomming and slobbering away on them. “If I ever come home with a blazer, now you know why.” He grinned at Stephanie and leaned back in his chair as Isabella tried to decide if she liked how the pink or orange key tasted. A moment passed as he watched Stephanie’s reactions to his goddaughter and then pressed a kiss on her blonde hair. “It’s weird. Right? To think we can have days like this even in our own Gotham. The ceremony was beautiful even though I was a mess of nerves and this whole party is like a godda-duck...” Eddie fixed his language carefully eyeing Isabella who didn’t seem to care. “G’duck oasis.”
Stephanie tried to lose all of the weight hanging off of her, too, and didn’t Isabella make it easier? Tension built in her bones that only he could see seemed to slowly fade away the longer she watched Izzy. The brighter the baby smiled, the louder her giggles, the more Eddie came off as a natural, the easier Steph found it to turn all of that other junk off. It was easier to pretend, for the moment, that Earth-3 was a dream, that she and Eddie didn’t have a long standing tension that spanned years. She relinquished the keys without hesitation, and leaned a little closer to look at Isabella like she’d never seen anything quite like her before.
“So you’re conning her into loving you. Isn’t he?” Stephanie asked, a quiet cant of baby voice taking over her light Gotham accent. “He’s a sneaky, charming man, Izzy. You better watch out. He’ll wiggle his way into your heart, and before you know it, it’s six years down the road and you’re done for.” She bopped Izzy’s nose with an easy sort of grin Eddie only saw in quiet moments on Earth-3 when she could lose herself in him and forget about what was going on beyond the two of them.
The kiss to her hair earned a smile, though she shot him a wry look. “Nice save, Nashton.” Her hand ran up and down his upper arm before slipping into the pocket of his blazer. She nodded, letting herself observe Izzy take each key into her mouth as if tasting them and she laughed before turning back to her riddled man. “Yeah, it is. But we’ve earned it. And I’m glad it exists. That we know it exists.” There might have been something hanging in her words before Izzy giggled her way into her heart, but it was just honesty at this point. “But it’s really, really weird. I feel like I don’t belong here.”
Izzy kicked excitedly and lost her grip on the toy keys. Eddie, who apparently had seen this happen on numerous occasions or could simply see a couple steps into the future, reached his hand out and caught them before they could hit the ground. “You’re too drunk to drive, Izzy. I’m not giving these keys back.” He told the baby sternly and then took a grand total of five seconds before he relented. She swatted at his hand, grabbing onto a pinky while trying to shove the keys back into her mouth. That little tiny grip on his finger melted Edward Nashton inside and out and he gave a smile like he couldn’t stop it. Like his goddaughter was pulling all the strings now.
“You don’t?” Eddie looked up to Stephanie when she said she felt like she didn’t belong and concern bled into his expression. “Of course you do, Steph. We never felt at home on Earth-3. Did that flat we lived in ever feel like a home?” He wasn’t trying to be hard on her, if anything he was just worried all the things he had said and the way he reacted to her wanting, well, this had hurt her. Yes, Eddie was still having a hard time getting over what Stephanie did and maybe Harley was right, he hadn’t completely forgiven her for it, but he still loved her. He still wanted her to be happy.
Stephanie laughed as Izzy dropped the keys and Eddie immediately reacted, like a dance practiced a thousand times before and executed perfectly every single night. She smiled with affection, impressed and enamored with the scene unfold in front of her. It was unwritten law, especially of long-term relationships, that most women would positively melt watching their man interact with a young baby so easily, and she immediately fell more in love with Eddie at the sight, too. Despite the ache in her chest and the jealousy that bubbled somewhere underneath the surface, she couldn’t ignore the warm bliss she felt as Eddie held Izzy. Isn’t this what every single woman in the room wanted at some point in their life? To have a man who loved them, who loved children, who could do all of this so naturally?
She glanced up and around to see if Marie was watching them like a hawk with the steepled fingers of a matchmaker who wanted to bring more babies into the world. Wondering if any of them would keep pushing for this if they knew what she did. Steph had no idea of Eddie and Harley’s conversation about white picket fences, and god if all of them knew, they would just stop. Her mouth screwed up for a second, but slacked when she saw that easy smile on his face. A slow, easy happiness curved up her mouth, and any onlooker could see how much the blonde in purple and tattoos could want this life. With babies, with the picket fence, with the family and friends that didn’t collapse into themselves.
Stephanie shrugged. “It’s not that,” she whispered, aware that this wasn’t appropriate conversation for a baptism or for little Izzy’s ears. Even though no one, including the baby, was really paying attention to that. The blonde still smiled through it, lost and a little intoxicated in Eddie and the baby. “That place was never home, even five years later, but it was a home.” She rolled her lips together in thought and skated a hand over Izzy’s peachfuzz dark hair atop her head. “But you have to admit something’s off.” She shook her head again, like maybe he didn’t feel like something was off. She knew she still had the nightmares, but maybe he fell more easily back into things than she did.
Shrugging again, she smiled as if that would stop any further questions. “Can I hold her?” she asked, hopeful and a little wary. Eddie had an innate ability with babies, but whether it was lingering guilt from the daughter she gave up or something else, Steph couldn’t be the baby whisperer he was. The big, bad ex-bat, who took on UJL with nothing but a bow, an arrow, and a pray, who wanted all of this, was scared of holding something as delicate as a baby.
Eddie smiled as Stephanie gently ran her fingers over Isabella’s head and then sighed. Admitting that outside of this baptism reception was a big bad world filled with nightmares and danger and the sliver of a chance they’d lose everything again was hard. “No, you’re right.” He said with a nod and swallowed down that creeping feeling. “But, no matter what, we don’t belong back there.” Eddie gave her a serious look that faded away at Izzy’s babbling at him and he offered Stephanie a soft smile. A mix between comfort and regret that they couldn’t just have this without any Earth-3 to get in the way.
He turned his attention back to Isabella, letting her chomp on his fingers as she had apparently decided they were better tasting than any of the keys. When Stephanie asked to hold her, he carefully picked Isabella up and raised her to eye level with him. “Are you going to behave for Stephanie?” Eddie asked the baby, his mouth making a funny little frown as if Isabella was a big troublemaker. In response, she slapped his mouth with one of her chubby hands and giggled at him, to which Eddie made a gentle growling noise that only seemed to make the giggling worse.
“She says she does what she wants. No adult is going to bring her down.” Eddie translated and then carefully handed Isabella over. Once free of baby, he reached back for a slice of bread from a nearby basket and chomped into it, washing it down with the wine. He tried not to seem too interested in Stephanie’s interaction with the baby. On one hand, she might have felt uncomfortable even after all these years from giving up her own child as a teenager. On the other hand, Isabella was a delight.
Her stomach lurched again at that soft smile, and she could sense all those feelings that came along with it. She bit back a whine of discomfort, and tried to lose herself back in that damn party again. Her eyes followed the gaggle of kids playing in the corner, and she couldn’t hide the affectionate, longing smile that crawled up her mouth. If Stephanie didn’t feel so happy to witness a snatch of normalness, she might think all of this was some cruel twist of fate to be surrounded by exactly what she wanted, by what got ruined during the last five years. She wondered if Earth-3 hadn’t happened how long it would have been until they were here themselves. Where they would be parading around a beautiful baby girl of their own.
But, it was easier to forget about all of that when Eddie placed Isabella in her arms, though the stiffness in her body stayed. “So, you’re already having her take after you, then, huh?” Stephanie flashed him a wry smile before her full attention fell on the baby in her arms. Isabella squirmed a little, fussing for the guy with the curly q hair and the really cool toys, but the blonde rocked her gently, offering her a hand to choose a finger to tug on. Izzy immediately grabbed her pink and tugged in the kind of way Steph tugged on Eddie’s fingers when she wanted his attention or adoration, and the ex-bat relaxed again.
“Are you gonna grow up to be a troublemaker like this one? Huh?” Stephanie looked down at the baby’s thoughtful, bright eyes and scrunched her nose up in thought. For her part, Izzy put the pinky in her mouth and slobbered all over it. “I think you’re more of a crime fightin’ type of troublemaker to me, Izzy.” Hmmm, hmmm, thoughtful noise, and when Izzy got bored, Stephanie sat her up in her lap like Eddie had, unconsciously emulating whatever he had done because she liked the way it look. “Hmmm. Yeah. You’ve got bat written all over you, kid.” Stephanie grinned bright and easy, tickling Izzy’s belly, which caused a squeal of delight from the baby.
Eddie took another bite of bread, eyeing Stephanie and the baby curiously. He liked to think Stephanie was a natural with kids and would make a good mother if she ever wanted that in her life. Maybe it was just those love goggles strapped on too tightly. “A crime fighter? Don’t listen to her, Izzy. Nothing good comes from a life of bats and birds.” He said, all thick Gotham slum accent pouring through as if Stephanie and himself were from different sides of the tracks. Of course, that wasn’t true. Eddie could never see himself loving a girl that didn’t come from the same neighborhood he did.
He traded the wine out for a glass of water and finished his bread before scooching closer to press a kiss on Stephanie’s shoulder and rest the side of his head there. Eddie smiled as Stephanie and Isabella played, letting himself imagine for a second it was their daughter on her lap. It was wrong to want something like that, he knew it all too well, but it felt good just giving into that daydream without anyone knowing.
“See, she loves you.” Eddie murmured as if Isabella not breaking out into a cry the second she sat on Stephanie’s lap was a good sign. “Then again, I don’t know how she couldn’t.” He turned to kiss her shoulder again, this time lingering a little longer as if he was punctuating his point.
“Don’t you listen to him, Izzy,” Stephanie insisted, as if she thought getting involved with bats and birds was the best idea for a four-month-old. She glanced at Eddie through the corner of her eye, affection for him and silly bliss through Izzy. “See, if I didn’t get all wrapped up with those bats and birds, I never would have gotten together with this goofball, and who would be around to keep him on his toes? Well, besides you, Iz.” She tickled the baby again, eliciting another excited squeal, and oh did the blonde love the sound of that. Eddie could see it in the way her face warmed, in the way her shoulders relaxed as he pressed kisses to one of them. Stephanie might not have been the natural that he was, but underneath the tattoos and scars and toughness lay a heart of gold that couldn’t resist the gurgling of a happy baby girl.
“You’re biased,” she responded, distracted by the baby in a way that all women who wanted this could be. That longing lingered under the charmed smile, but Stephanie didn’t think about it, bopping Izzy’s nose again before falling into a trail of silly expressions. Puffed out cheeks, tongue sticking out, eyes going cross. “It’s hard not to fall in love with her either.” Steph bounced her on her lap lightly, little brrrrrs and funny noises from her lips before turning away from the little girl to look at her riddled man. “You’re a natural with her, baby.” An oww oww escaped from her as Izzy reached up to grab a strand of blonde, but she didn’t stop her roaming, curious hands. Steph tilted her head into the tug, letting Izzy slobber on the hair in her hand and giving her a better position to look at her riddled man.
“I shouldn’t say how turned on I am to see you with a baby in your arms with her so close and a priest somewhere in the room, but I’d be lying to myself if I didn’t.” Underneath all of that, of course, was the desire to have all of this with him. She’d be lying if she hadn’t pictured them in Marie and Frank’s position more than once throughout the day. She’d wished at multiple points that she hadn’t screwed up so royally and that Earth-3 wasn’t so ingrained into their lives that they couldn’t have this.
Eddie laughed as the baby pulled at her hair, “See? Troublemaker.” He reached to gently untangle Isabella’s grip, letting her grab onto his finger instead and shake it around like a new toy. His gaze drifted up to Stephanie as she told him how attractive it was to be good with children. And, then he said something really stupid. Something true, something that was honest and straight from his gut. But, something really stupid. Eddie sat up and smiled at her, dazed by her affection and the tiny little domestic bubble they had created.
“Oh yeah?” He leaned in to kiss Stephanie gently. “Then, I guess we better start thinking about making our ooow-” His brain caught up with him a little too late and his eyes went wide like he had just accidentally walked himself off a cliff. “I- I got I should go give her back, people want pictures with-” Eddie’s ears turned red as he turned to look around for Marie but she was no where in sight.
The worst part was Stephanie knew him. She could tell the difference between a simple slip up and accidentally saying exactly what he wanted. The blonde ex-bat had cracked that particular code and now she knew that desire for something more wasn’t off the table. He was caught. Eddie finally saw Frank (who gave him a look like he saw the whole thing) and gently picked Isabella off Stephanie’s lap. He stood, baby in his arms so she was peeking over his shoulder and walked her back to Frank before Stephanie could tell him otherwise.
He stopped about halfway, pulling Isabella from his shoulder so he could look at her, tell her something that Stephanie couldn’t make out from that distance and then kissed the top of her head before finally handing her back over to Frank. The walk back was long and winding, making sure to stop and chat for a second with a few people to get his nerve back. Finally, he moseyed back over to the table, hands in his pockets as he gave her a sheepish and loving look. All he wanted was for her to say it was okay.
Stephanie kept her eyes trained on Isabella once Eddie relinquished the baby’s firm hold on her hair, falling quicker and more in love with the idea of this being their life and simultaneously trying to squash the notion. It was so hard, though, when the evidence of happiness sat so blatantly close to them, slobbering on Eddie’s finger. She couldn’t fight off the overwhelming feeling that this was so right for them, even if she had destroyed that semblance of hope years prior in a Gotham that wasn’t theirs. Eddie, rightfully in her mind, probably hadn’t fully forgiven her, and some days she still woke up shocked when he would still be there, sleeping next to her. She had turned him off the idea completely, and that was it. It was her cross to bear.
So, Eddie’s words hit her like a freight train. She stiffened and was careful not to tighten her grip on the baby as she continued to bounce the baby, slower now and less conscious of the giggling and joy that intoxicated her only seconds before. Oh, she knew it wasn’t just some simple slip-up. Even when he “didn’t mean” to say things, he actually kind of did, especially things this important. She just looked at him as he stuttered out a distraction and excuse to break the tension, and truthfully, it was hard to pinpoint what she was thinking in her expression. She was shell-shocked mostly, that was certain, but was she happy about it? Sad? Angry? All of the above? That might have been the closest answer to that puzzle, but Stephanie couldn’t have given him a hint if she tried. A maelstrom of emotions racked through her body because he had admitted something she’d wanted him to since they’d come back. A flicker of hope that she didn’t actually know what to do with.
Steph took the entire time he was gone to try to shuffle through the muddled mess that was her mind, to catalogue the pain from the sadness from the rage from the weightlessness of hope, but she couldn’t hope to make heads or tails of it all. So, she focused on that modicum of happiness this all brought her. The revelation that Eddie might still want that same sort of forever that she did again? It warmed her fingers and toes and filled her with that pesky hope that always niggled at the back of her brain despite herself. When he finally strolled back over, she had finished her glass of wine, and while her expression was still relatively unreadable, she wiggled her fingers to bring him back over to her.
“C’mere, baby,” she said, and maybe it would surprise him to find no anger or sadness in her voice. Was that better or worse? She looked up at him expectantly, and then considered something. “What kind of secrets were you telling Izzy while you didn’t have me around?” She’d seen him whisper something in affection to the baby earlier, causing another jump of her heart and ache in her chest when she saw it. Her eyebrow cocked up now, and her lips twitched into the smallest curve of a smile.