Some of it is doctor suggestions, so I try to listen to those as much as I can. It doesn't always work. [...]
[...] I love him. I'm probably in love with him at this point. Thinking about life without him and without Bean scares the shit out of me, but thinking about it with them isn't any better. [...] I think if I got my shit together, I could probably see being together for a really long time. And I never thought I'd say that about someone but I think I'm a lot different than I used to be about some things. But it's not all on me, either.