Re: Penny R/Sam A
I can't fix this, I can't make this all go away. But I can assure you that these things you're saying, these things that you think you did to him or are making him do - these things were fucking him up long before you ever came along. The crying, and fighting, and throwing punches and losing his mind. That don't surprise me a bit. You both got baggage. You both need to figure out how to carry it together. Maybe you can't, but that's a decision that has to be come to together not one for the other and vice versa. You let him decide what he can stand from you. And you decide what you can stand from him.
Cris deserves the world handed to him on a silver platter. But me and you can't make that happen. The world ain't a perfect place, and he's going through a real bad trauma that he don't know how to deal with. Because he don't know how to deal with anything proper. This bitch that put her hands on him, I'm fixing to wear her teeth as a necklace because it'll make me feel like something is being done rather than a big fat "I'm fine" coming out of his mouth. That ain't real healthy on his part, or mine. And I'll tell you, someone I love once told me that Cris was going to get me into trouble one day, or worse. But I don't care. Didn't care then, and don't care now. So this shit? It goes all around.
You're dealing with shit too, and you shouldn't have to deal with it all by yourself either. It took me a long time to figure that out, and maybe you still need to learn it. And I hope the both of you do. I don't know if that means you two work out your problems and lean on each other, or go your separate ways and lean on other people, but the both of you are shutting out people who care when you need to take everyone you can get.