Re: very much anon/lin a
I think one of the hardest things to come to terms with, and it's like, really hard to see when you're down in the trenches of it, is that the trajectory of change, or a person's development, isn't some perfect arc or incline. It's going to be this jagged thing, like, shit some kid draws on a sidewalk that's like, hella abstract, and sometimes, it's going to be a retrograde performance, you'll slip back, or the only progress you'll make is hard won, but any inch you gain counts. And if you could look at it from above, you'd see, overall, you're moving in the right direction.
I've been killed in dreams before. Or I've been around long enough not be so disturbed by it, maybe. Either way, girl, you're right. I did see how you see yourself, and I know someone else who thinks the same way, and he's not a monster either.