There was a lot that came with the knowledge that you were pregnant. A lot of it was simply fear. Fear of being a parent when you weren’t ready, fear of the knowns that came with pregnancy and what was happening with her body. But the biggest source of fear right now for her was the fear of being pregnant to a pure blood. She had a lot of reasons to fear that. She knew of his friends - pure bloods themselves and very likely purists as most of those she’d encountered of pure blood were purists. They looked down on anything and anyone that wasn’t one of their own. While she could care less about what they thought of her, her child would be poorly thought of and worse a threat to their ‘purist’ lifestyle as a halfblood.
Jacen, in all her time with him, had never seemed like a purist although there were times that she swore his words seemed almost sympathetic to their ideology. His desire to understand and yet condemn both sides of the war infuriated her. How you could and wanted to understand a lifestyle and a belief that made others into lesser life forms?
“Tu m'entends.” She said back in ana almost calm but eerily so, tone. Perhaps she hadn’t said it out right but even Ella knew that what she’d said bordered on suggesting that he himself was a purist. He wasn’t, on some level she knew that he wasn’t but her fear and the anger that he’d just isolated himself from her, that he’d seemingly run from the situation….it was a lot on top of the already swirling thoughts she had on the subject and made it easy to blame not just him but the situation they were in.
“En anglais?” She asked pausing as she thought about what to say but paused at the way he spoke. Something about the way he spoke sparked her own anger once more and Ella’s gaze narrowed. “If you think…” she paused obviously searching for the words as she tried to quickly translate her own thoughts into English for him though it certainly was not her first language and she found it difficult, at best, to do when angry.
“You ran,” she said finally as her anger came out, thickening her tone. “You discovered I was pregnant and ran and hid from it. Now you stand before me and question if I can protect myself or not? You would suggest that I am incapable? Unlike you I cannot run away, I must stand and fight. So if you want to suggest that I cannot protect myself go back to your purist friends. I’m sure they will welcome you with…” again she paused but thought better of the next insult at least and left it where it was. “You are no different if you would run in shame of what happened.”