InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Love an Ood, hello! Ood!"

Ginny Weasley (toomanybrothers) wrote in resurrectio_rpg,
@ 2008-05-18 23:25:00

WHO: Ginny Weasley and Harry Potter
WHAT: Some searching, some apologizing, and some other things
WHERE: Gryffindor commons
WHEN: Shortly after this exchange.
WHY: Because Arnold is missing
RATING: PG-13 for language most likely
STATUS: Incomplete

With the dorm room practically torn to pieces and still no sign of the small pink fuzzball, Ginny decided it was time to re-search the commonroom in hopes that she'd missed something. Or that Arnold had somehow found his way back to the tower. She probably shouldn't have been so upset about losing him, but Arnold was special. He was her pet and while sure he was a pygmypuff and he didn't do much aside from squeak and hop around, he was Ginny's and he had cheered her up more times than she could count. She hated thinking that he could be lost forever.

She descended the stairs, pausing about half way to get an overhead view of the room before she began her search. The commons were littered with younger years and she was frantically watching to be sure that none of them were about to step on her pet. She hurried down the steps (minding where she put her feet of course) and began the tedious task of trying to get the younger years to cooperate with her frantic search.

Carefully and diligently lifting and moving things around, Ginny kept a sharp eye out for Arnold.

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_harry
2008-05-18 10:47 pm UTC (link)

Harry had set his journal aside and waited for Ginny at the far end of the commons. He observed the stairway to the girls' dorms carefully, clasping and unclasping his hands. His right knee thrummed up and down; his usual fidgeting was apparent especially when he was awaiting confrontation. He felt himself swallow convulsively when Ginny tiptoed down the stairs, her eyes on the floor and then on the first years.

He stood slowly and made his way toward her. He attempted a tentative smile and sucked in a breath. He stood a little ways from her; a month of silence meant he couldn't step as close as before. "Hullo, Ginny."

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toomanybrothers
2008-05-18 10:54 pm UTC (link)

Ginny looked up when she heard her name, the worry slipping from her face for a moment to give a small flash of anger. "So you do remember my name, then." She said a bit cooly as she continued moving things around, looking for Arnold. If he could ignore her for a month or so, she could multi-task while he tried to break his silence.

She got that he still wasn't right from the war and all, and honestly, she knew she probably wasn't so much either, but she still talked to her friends. She only wanted to help him get himself to where he could say he was alright and mean it. She hated feeling rejected and helpless all at the same time.

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_harry
2008-05-18 11:06 pm UTC (link)

Harry shoved his hands in his pockets awkwardly, and bit back his immediate urge to retort with something bitter or snippy. His eyes followed hers around the floor, but he didn't see Arnold anywhere. He opened his mouth, shut it, and walked with Ginny. "I know I haven't - you know. I haven't been a friend, lately. That doesn't mean I've forgotten you," he sighed. "How could I?" His eyes were troubled and his voice sincere, but his facial muscles were taut.

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toomanybrothers
2008-05-18 11:15 pm UTC (link)

Ginny kept her eyes on the floor while he spoke. She figured as long as she could keep herself from looking him, she could keep her guard up a bit better. It had taken her a while to build it back up and she wasn't quite ready go have him go and breaking it down again. She was mad at him, damnit and he wasn't going to get out of that so easily.

"You could've y'know, acknowledged me a bit more." She stated as she picked up a pillow and searched the couch cushions. "I just..." She glanced up at him and ran a hand through her hair. "I don't enjoy feeling invisible to you." She didn't enjoy it when she was eleven and she certainly didn't enjoy it now. Not after she'd finally gotten his attention.

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_harry
2008-05-18 11:25 pm UTC (link)

Harry frowned and fiddled with the string of his sweater, pulling on it and twisting it around. "I know," he murmured uncomfortably. "I didn't mean to really ignore you, I've just been..." he trailed off, peering into the cushions. "I've just been feeling weird, lately, and you don't really need me being all messed up."

He exhaled quickly and crossed his arms. "You're not invisible, Ginny, you haven't been. I've just wanted to be invisible."

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toomanybrothers
2008-05-18 11:30 pm UTC (link)

Ginny tossed the pillow back onto the couch gently and let out a sigh. Looking back up at him she frowned a bit and shook her head. "I know that...I know that you're not..." She didn't know how to say it without making it sound like he ought to be in St. Mungo's mental ward. Which she knew he didn't, but wording it was tricky. "And no one expects you to be completely alright after what happened, but Harry..." She broke off and took a deep breath. "For Merlin's sake, we want to help you. I want to help you. What the bleeding hell are friends for if they're just going to abandon you when you need them?"

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	_harry 2008-05-18 11:43 pm UTC (link)
	"I know you want to help. I know that, and you've all said that, but I don't know that you can." Harry tucked his arms further into his sides. "I don't want to drag the rest of you down, because you are my friends, and you'd all do better-" without me around "if you didn't have my issues to deal with too." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

toomanybrothers
2008-05-18 11:48 pm UTC (link)

At this, Ginny stopped her search for her lost pygmypuff and stepped closer to Harry. She grabbed his shoulders, her head shaking. "Harry...you're not dragging us...Are you..." she couldn't even properly process what he was saying. She wanted desperately to be able to simply shake some sense into him.

"Can't you see that we're bleeding worried about you? Dealing with...Nothing could be worse than watching you get inside your own head and destroy yourself over things that...Things you can't control. We all care too much about you to let you do something like that. Only problem is you're not exactly making it easy on us."

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_harry
2008-05-19 12:00 am UTC (link)

Harry withdrew somewhat from Ginny's touch, dropping his eyes. "I am dragging you down. I'm dragging everyone down, have you seen Remus lately? He looks at me in class and I-" Harry realised his voice was getting a little too loud to avoid being heard in the common room and he cleared his throat.

"I don't want you all to worry about me. I should be able to take care of myself." He looked up at her, and in his eyes was vulnerability, something he had refused himself in the war but could no longer.

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toomanybrothers
2008-05-19 12:06 am UTC (link)

Ginny let go of him and threw her hands up in frustration. "He looks at you like that because he's worried! Merlin, Harry! I don't know how else to say it. I could get a poster...maybe get an elf to sing it to you, but that's the long and the short of it. He's worried. I'm worried. We're all bleeding worried." She checked her own volume before letting out yet another sigh.

"Too bloody bad. You're going to have us worrying whether you want it or not." She said a bit more harshly than what was likely necessary. "It's not exactly something we can help, y'know. When it comes to you, it's simply become habit." She looked down at the couch, pretending to look for Arnold, but really just sorting her thoughts.

After a long moment she finally spoke. "I'd rather help you deal with whatever it is you've got going on than sit on the sidelines thinking you think I'm invisible."

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_harry
2008-05-19 12:14 am UTC (link)

Harry turned to drop into the couch, but halfway down he stood again, lifted the cushion, and checked for Arnold. He then sat with a measure of exhaustion, looking up at Ginny with his mouth in a grim, unsettled line. "I know that's why he looks at me. He's got enough to deal with without me, is all." He took a cushion from the couch, looked underneath, then hugged it to himself much as a much younger child might a teddy bear.

"I don't really know what all to do, Gin. About me, about you," and the unspoken, you and me, "about anything. I feel like I'm in trudging through a vat of molasses all the time."

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toomanybrothers
2008-05-19 12:21 am UTC (link)

Ginny gave a weak smile and took a seat on the arm of the couch, resting her head in her hands. "Clearly he doesn't think so." She remarked giving him a sort of sideways glance. He was so bloody thick it was maddening sometimes. If he could just learn to let someone take care of him a bit, he'd be entirely less frustrating.

"Well that's why you talk to your sodding friends, Potter." She pointed out, for what she felt was the seventeen thousandth time. "Cause maybe we will know what to do about the molasses. And then that'll save you loads in laundry bills. Impossible to get molasses out, y'know." She teased lightly. She couldn't help it. Part of growing up with the twins was always managing to crack a joke even at the most inappropriate moments.

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_harry
2008-05-19 12:35 am UTC (link)

"Oh no," Harry said, his face taking on a look of mock-despair. It was easier to deal with than real despair. "I hadn't even THOUGHT about the laundry bills. Now I'm really in trouble." He laughed softly.

He peered up at Ginny, then, studying her closely. He had hurt her, hadn't he? Had he hurt her more than he could've if he'd never left her, never avoided her, never sought to spare her? "I'm sorry," he said plainly, his eyes meeting hers directly for the first time.

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toomanybrothers
2008-05-19 12:44 am UTC (link)

Ginny grinned. "Merlin's beard. Someone get a camera. I think I just saw a smile." She teased again. Godric she'd missed that. It was about time.

She broke the gaze first when he apologized. Shifting uncomfortably on the arm of the couch. She had been hurt. Hurt, and worried and all sorts of wretched after everything had happened. But he didn't need to know about all of that. He clearly had enough to deal with on his own without her selfishly going on about how her own thing which was minor in comparasson. "Yeah...well, you ought to be." She said after a moment. "But it's all right." It wasn't really all right, but what the bloody hell else was she going to say?

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_harry
2008-05-19 12:55 am UTC (link)

"Well, no, it's not, really," Harry said, rather practically. He frowned and shifted over on the couch in a silent invitation for Ginny to abandon her less-than-comfortable couch arm and join him. "But maybe it will be." For the first time in quite a while, Harry allowed himself a measure of hope that there was, in fact, a way to live after the war without isolating himself.

He sat quietly for a moment, thinking over this conversation and the one he'd had in the journal with Ginny. It had gone much better than he thought it might. Maybe both of them were mellowing, at least when it came to pettiness. "I'm worried about Hermione," he said suddenly, recalling that she and Ginny had had a conversation.

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toomanybrothers
2008-05-19 01:05 am UTC (link)

Ginny hesitated for a moment before moving to sit beside him. She still wasn't sure what, if anything, would happen between them and quite frankly, that scared her.

"Well, y'know, if I wasn't so worried too, I'd swat you for the obvious subject change." Ginny said with a pointed look. "But as it were, I'm a bit more than worried about her. She and Ron...They haven't talked or well, anything. And she's upset, but I couldn't get more than that out of her before she left."

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