Re: Mulder/Scully
My stars in the sky, I suspect that you might be the more likely of us to find a publisher willing to share our tale of alien postmen and federal-level probing with the world. Your letters remain eloquent as ever. Might you settle for having my diary dedicated to you? All of the public scrutiny that surely comes with a government expose is dissuasion enough for me. I wouldn't mind the USPS assassination attempts, but having to go on the Wendy Williams show and all the others for publicity sake sounds like the true terror.
If it ever really bothered me, I do not think I noticed. I believe that it might be the kind of pain that I would only feel upon realizing the wound was there. Do you know what I mean to say? After acknowledging these things with you and returning to my life and my gentle, fuzzy conversations with the people closest to me, I expect that it will bother me in ways it never did before. To answer your question, I am very introspective. I live the world from inside myself, and contemplate the heaviest things in silence. I know no other way to be.
I only meant that I do not believe that I know you outside of these letters. As we've admitted to being much more open with each other than we are with people in the rest of our lives, I could be wrong. But even if I don't know you, I know you. Consider yourself known, Scully.
Is there something that I would like to do only for myself? This question feels impossibly large and therefore makes me uncomfortable. Can I get back to you on it?
I'd rather think myself incapable than constantly missing out on the chance for something revolutionary. Both viewpoints are tragic, but it feels less so if one accepts impossibility and moves on.
I'm sorry you had to experience that, Scully.
M
Should we switch to brightly colored ink and aim for optimism next go round, then?