Re: [The Bridge over the River: Patrick/Newt]
I think we are mindful of others, my man, and we are not hurtful if it can be helped, but it is dangerous to subvert our needs for others. It is bad for us, and it is not really good for them. [It was an earnest response, man. It was what the dude thought, even though it was often harder to live his own words.] But this situation with Adrian does not fall into the category, before you say it does. I think there is this unspoken rule, man, that we do not lock lips with those our siblings are in love with. [Maybe it was too direct, but Patrick liked direct, especially when he was not panicking.] If I told Con what I did, she would find me in the wrong. If I told almost everyone I know what I did, they would find me in the wrong. Adrian is the hurt party. I accept this. [He was grateful to move on to the subject of pranks.] If I am pranking you, then I accept the consequences. [He did not know enough about the dark stormcloud to know if going it alone was a good thing, and so he trusted Newt's opinion on the matter.]
I am enlightened. [He was being honest, for all the teasing in his voice.] Man, I do not buy into good people and bad people. We choose, every time we do something, what type of person we are going to be in that moment. [He did not argue that shit was not difficult. That would make him a most bald-faced liar.] I am not having an easy time, and conversations with Adrian have not made it easier. I do not think he understands, man, and I want to make him understand. I know this has not been easy for you, either. [He laughed about Dahl.] After she yelled at me, she was most helpful. For the record, she too would tell me I am a motherfucker for kissing you. I omitted this detail.
[He thought about feelings, now that he was on his back and looking up at the canopy and sliver of sky.] I think that once we have cared about someone, there is always something there that differentiates them from other people. It might not be love any longer, but something remains. Do you not agree? You are kind to Adrian, man, even when he maddens you. I will remind you of this. [He lifted one leg and perched his boot on the edge of the bridge, knee bent up.] Man, I loved those summers. No report cards. No bad grades. No teachers always telling Webster I did not comprehend the lessons. No Webster insisting they put me in more advanced classes to make me try harder. [He turned his head, cheek pressed to wooden slat.] I am sorry your home life sucked, man. I am truly sorry for this.