Re: In-person: Misha B/Damian W
[Misha, he nuzzled 'gainst Damian as much as he could. The boy was on his lap, true, but Misha wasn't the only one offering comfort. He pressed his nose to cheek and temple, and he breathed real deep and slow. Calm, it was good for Misha, despite all his loving of the bright lights and chaos of humanity outside the quiet walls of this space.] I ain't actually human, you ken? I ain't half-bred. Could be it would be easier if I was. [He rubbed his cheek 'gainst Damian's scratchier one, and then he drew back and ran his fingers 'long Damian's upper lip, then higher, where the boy's skin was darker 'long the line of hair that grew stubbly and dark in the eveningtime.] I love you. [Could be that wasn't the point, but the echo was warm.] It's a real well-known slope. Heaven, it's real white. I know that's a real weird way to describe a place, but it is. Everything's pure and quiet and intellectual, least for us, and most angels are thousands and thousands of years old. Talking to folks, like you, it's real brilliant. It's blinding some. You feel different to me than anything up there does. [He splayed his fingers atop Damian's sweater, pressing there.] There ain't nothing like this where I spent my last decade. And time ain't normal there. It ain't a real big thing for them, since they don't age, but I found it endless. And we ain't meant to please. We're meant to keep balance by protecting folks, since the other side has their version of us doing just the opposite, like Janus. If you hear them talk up there, this is like a war.
[He liked being real close too. True, they weren't doing a thing but wrapped up talking, but it felt like the whole world was outside that door, and nothing could crawl itself on in, not earthbound or otherwise, and Misha touched Damian's ear when the boy nodded.] I know I ain't a manner of coping. I meant to say you didn't want to need me neither. Needing things, it ain't real easy. [His smile twisted intimate, and his voice did the same.] You couldn't help wanting me, though, and I reckon you tried real hard. [It was a topic he would've stayed on, on account of it being easier than his foster daddy, but he hadn't spoke words 'bout the man in any true way to anyone but Damian, and it was real hard to stopper the words once they came.] You know how to just feel. You're doing it right now, Damian. What do you feel sitting here with me? You tell me in words. [His smile was soft.] I love feeling things. Good or bad, and I won't shy from them any. But, I don't reckon I got a choice after the ECT and all that distance. [He was referring to denying being an angel recent, that was true.] But it ate at me, not remembering. When I was real young, after they took me away, it was like that for a long spell. But that passed, and I ran off and came down here. [He closed his eyes as Damian kissed his cheek, and then he was looking at the boy from a real small bit of distance.] I reckon it was jealousy. Like I told Sasha when I apologized, I ain't never felt that feeling before. I know fear. I'm real aware of what it tastes like, and it wasn't fear. But, you ain't wrong. I felt awful. Feeling bad things, it ain't a reason to be mean or take it out on other folks. I'm allowed to feel them things, but I won't lash out on account. [Then, it was fingers to Damian's jaw, and Misha skimmed the other boy's face careful. Firm:] You ain't weak. I don't think you're weak. I don't see weak when I look on you. ا نـت جـمـيـلـة